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Hi and Lois, 9/19/19

I don’t know why Lois even has an elaborate, frilly apron that seems like it wouldn’t be much practical use for protecting your clothes from cooking splashes and is probably from some catalog dedicated to eroticized maidwear … actually, scratch that, I know exactly why she has it: it’s for sex play, and she obviously deploys it on the regular when she watches the Donna Reed Show and gets hornt up, and, you know, good for her, BUT: Hi has clearly suffered some kind of vicious beating on his way home from work, with his suit badly damaged and his eyes wide and unfocused due to shock or maybe a concussion. This is no time for love, Lois! Read the room!

Gil Thorp, 9/19/19

Hey, remember this past summer, when we revisited a former high school athletic superstar who also liked books and learning, like a damn nerd? Well, welcome to this year’s football plot, where the star running back likes quiet evenings at home reading books, like a damn nerd. He likes books more than sex even. What madness is this?