Funky Winkerbean, 3/26/16
Proof positive that Funky Winkerbean takes place ten years in the future: Everyone, even people going to see classic films in retro movie theaters that cater specifically to cinephiles, just talks at full volume right through the movie now. This is basically my nightmare scenario for the future, frankly. I’d rather have the killer robots take over. At least that’d be faster.
Judge Parker, 3/26/16
“Look, I don’t actually care about this arbitrary rule you broke! Why don’t you call someone over my head? Why don’t you hire my sister? Why don’t you contemplate how small my hourly rate is compared to your vast resources? DO I HAVE TO SPELL THIS OUT FOR YOU?”
Gil Thorp, 3/26/16
Oh, yeah, right, so this confrontation ended with rugby star Kenzie breaking one of the bad kid’s jaws, and now everyone feels bad and weird because
you shouldn’t resolve your disputes through violence men should be violently protecting women, not vice versa. Now Coach Thorp is going to rouse himself from his usual torpor to Fix Things With The Teens, by use of clever thought experiments that definitely aren’t going give rise to lawsuits and/or lifelong emotional scars, no sir.
Hagar the Horrible, 3/26/16
OR MAYBE SHE JUST DOESN’T WANT TO TALK TO YOU GUYS, JESUS