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Well, my birthday isn’t until next week, but today is actually the fourth (fourth! ye gods) anniversary of the launch of this blog. Behold the first post ever, in which I quixotically take on Non Sequitur, something that I would not in fact attempt particularly often. Faithful reader Mark S., author of the fine Autumn Lake Webcomic, sent me these fine birthday cartoons to celebrate the occasion. Thanks to Mark, and thanks to everyone who’s read and commented over the years!

UPDATE: Oh yeah, and if you want to see some YouTube video shot by faithful reader Mooncattie at the Tucson Curmudgeon get-together, check it out! (I’m linking to his comment ’cause his descriptions are very funny.)

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OK, we’ll get to the COTW and runners-up momentarily, but first, several items of interest.

First! You may remember some days back that Uncle Lumpy posted a link to an honest-to-god real recording of “Tarzana Nights” by Kalamazoo-based songsters/madmen the New Real People. But today I am authorized to actually show you a picture of the recording session in progress (taken by faithful reader Jules), which I guarantee will blow your minds:

I would have loved to have seen the look on the face of the hapless Kinko’s employee who was handed the infamous “Ease up, friend” strip and told to blow it up to such gargantuan proportions. Remember, you can relive the magic on the New Real People’s Web site.

Speaking of Gil Thorp insanity, did you know that there’s now an official, authorized-by-the-syndicate Gil Thorp Facebook group? You young people who use the Facebook should totally join. I got the tip from the brilliant This Week In Milford blog, your source for all things Thorpian, which, naturally, also has a Facebook group. (As do I! Goodness gracious, with the technology!)

Also! I have received another adorable picture of a child wearing Comics Curmudgeon gear, in this case a Fist o’ Justice shirt. That’s little Lee, son of faithful reader Robert:

“He so does like to punch stuff!” says Robert of his four-week-old son.

Also! Faithful reader ChattyGenes posted an Aldomania ditty that you might enjoy.

And finally, at long last, brace yourself for the COMMENT OF THE WEEK!

“Mary Worth wears Depends with Snoopy’s picture on them, and the slogan ‘Happiness is a Warm Poopy.'” –The Spectacular Spider-Brick

(That’s a reference to this horror, if you’re confused.)

It was a hard choice this week, as the runners-up are also hilarious:

“I hate Curtis. I hate Curtis’ hat. Dear lord, how I hate that hat.” –Sully

“What Mr. Abner needs is a puppy!” –blueberrygrrrl

“Gosh, I remember when I was in marching band in the suburbs of Cleveland and cut out every single comic making fun of Wally playing the trombone, because gosh-dang it, I played the trombone, and it made me so happy to know that the comics pages reflected me — a Northeastern Ohio high schooler playing trombone on a muddy football field for a losing football team in the snow. Somewhere in Northeastern Ohio, an angry, cantankerous, cancerous former pizza store owner is cutting out today’s strip and proudly taping it on his refrigerator.” –Sunny Paris

“Let’s see … Dolly badly botching the lyrics to a song that only elderly people are likely to know, ending up in a malapropism. That’s it! Dolly is starting her Crankshaft training.” –Mibbitmaker

“Jack, meanwhile, clearly doesn’t know Margo very well at all. ‘Help you? Yeah, look, unless her sweater’s green because it’s actually made of money, I’m going to deal with the paintings here, thanks. Don’t let our flirtation make you think I have any interest in real human compassion — you want that crap, see if Alan will rent you Lu Ann for the hour.'” –Windier E. Megatons

“Before we enquire into Dolly’s rationale for singing boardwalk songs on Independence Day, perhaps we should determine the alcoholic content of whatever she has in that bucket.” –odinthor

“If Gabriella faints at ‘the presence of evil’ anyplace where low-level drug dealing and bad art occurs, how can she even enter lower Manhattan without immediately slipping into a coma?” –Hank

“I can’t wait for the bridezilla’ing to start. And the single malt. We’re gonna need it.” –Islamorada Girl

“Liz looks like the doll off the top of the music box, only about 10000 times more smug and entitled. ‘I did it! I finally did it! I fulfilled everyone’s expectations! Now I never have to think about anything ever again! Go me!'” –Shoebox

“Please let that be the plastic bag from the dry cleaners that Grandma Marion is preparing to clamp over Liz’s smug head. ‘Wear MY dress to marry a divorced man?! I’ll smother you first!'” –Stroker Ace

“Deanna has a pretty dreamy look as she cops a feel on Lizardbreath. Almost as if she finally has found a way to have sex with a Patterson.” –Lockestep

“What [Margo’in] reason would the Santa Royale city council have for calling two emergency meetings, two evenings in a row? More complaints about the old people smell? They’re never going to get rid of that.” –PeteMoss

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Wait, what’s this? Why, your favorite Uncle left a parting gift — some comments of the week for me to sift through! Here’s the new COTW, at long last:

“A crime-fighting judge? What a novel and entertaining idea. You might also consider adding a disease-fighting nurse, an illiteracy-fighting middle school teacher and perhaps a fire-fighting fireman, to add to the variety. Throw in a busman who drives buses and you’ll be all set.” — Henning Makholm

And some runners-up!

The specificity rolls on! For Herb, it must feel liberating, like coming out of the closet. ‘And I have a whole bunch of Captain & Tenille albums! And I eat Grape-Nuts for breakfast! Hee hee! And I drive a Ford! No, not just a Ford… dare I say it?’ ‘Don’t do it, former NBA star and longtime friend with whom I run a restaurant! You don’t know what’ll happen!’ ‘No, I’m gonna say it! A Ford Crown Victoria! And I prefer R.C. over Pepsi or Coke!’ — The Spectacular Spider-Brick

‘Is Spider-Man Really the Vulture?’ ???!? Why would someone who IS a secret identity NEED a secret identity?” — Pozzo

“I’m fairly sure Osama bin Laden has wept at some point today. If America’s the devil, then having Peter Parker mention your name must be like the most tediously pathetic version of hell.” — kitty

“Mary: You’ve driven me into the arms of another man, Jeff!
Jeff: How’d I do that?
Mary: By implying that I date other men!
Jeff: Huh?
Mary: Grovel, Jeff! Grovel!” — Hogenmogen

“Unfortunately, in Judge Parker’s book, the judge disappears on page 25, and the next 200 pages feature almost totally unrelated characters doing all of the crime-solving. Someone must have told him to write what he knows.” — Windier E. Megatons

“I love the serendipity of placing the ‘Learn to Draw the Human Figure’ blogad adjacent to Dick Tracy, whose illustrators have never, ever taken any such course.” — Evan

“Kitty is going down a bad path. Next thing you know, she is going to be doing lines of cat nip and having threesomes with Morris and Garfield. Stop her Rufus before it is too late.” — Walt’s Wallet

“If ya wanna date Mary Worth, ya gotta love dead fish.
Somehow I already guessed that.”– mojo

“Suddenly Coach Thorp’s team is trying to qualify for the playoffs, not the playdowns. Did their town move?” — Saluki

“Bonus! More similes for Dick Tracy villains! –
• Easy as chewing milk!
• Easy as shoveling wood!
• Smooth as a baby’s resume!
• Fungible as pie!
• Platitudinous as February 3rd!
• It was just like driving a train to the dentist!
• It was just like putting a rubber band around a lava lite!
• Like sand through the hourglass; these are the days of our lives!” — Muffaroo

“Gosh, was this just the best darndest Mary Worth ever or what? In one fell swoop, Ron goes from potential ‘friend with privileges’ to ‘friend with shriveleges.’ There’s a reason Mary wants you to order the raw oysters, Ron. Actually, a couple reasons.” — gh

Ahh, feels good to have the COTWs back, don’t it? Enjoy!

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