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Sorry for the delay, all, but here is your COMMENT OF THE WEEK!

“It’s clear from their matching outfits: Jeff = Ted + Time – Dignity.” –Albert Camus

And the runners-up:

“Is Abby’s pose in the last panel of Judge Parker supposed to be a look of horrified shock? Or is she just desperately, fiendishly sucking the last lingering molecules of chocolate-flavored THC from her fingers, as befits a newly-minted drug addict?” –mojo

“I’m pretty excited that the Crank is doing whippets while driving. That can only lead to something great.” –EFR

“Is this Mary Worth in a nutshell or what? ‘I went all the way to Vietnam for you, you owe me! Now, get out while I go visit with another man.'” –Mac

“Buxley is a civilian employee; that would be the other reason why she gets dates and not Lt. Blips — the fraternization rules don’t apply. Well, and the boobs.” –Nil Zed

“I’m actually enjoying these cats [in Gasoline Alley], BTW. They’re not nearly as disturbing as the usual lineup of pixies with blank, soulless eyes.” –cheech wizard

“Um, Mister Jameson? You know she can’t see or hear you, right?” –Thinks He’s Brenda Starr

“That fancy two-panels-in-one trick in Sally Forth makes it appear that Ted and Sally are discussing family planning and potential sexual intercourse with their identical twins. ‘Baby, it’s not cheating if it’s with our look-a-likes!'” –Gnemec

“That ‘everything being so expensive line’ totally sounds like something from Herb and Jamaal. Who says that? Everything is so expensive! Everything in the world! Nothing specific … say, remember the good old days when a box of medication for your crabs was only $1, and instead you’d use that dollar to buy a pair of handcuffs and spread the nasties to every hot nipple-less nature writer who dared to pop his little head into the room? You don’t? Cherry? Are you there?” –Howabominable (aka Lindsey ^_^)

“OMG, Mary is meddling in her own life. This can only mean the universe is about to die in fire.” –Inspector Dim

“I love the way in which Cherry has to get permission from a male in order to allow Kelly Welly to film in LoFo, or indeed make any decision other than to clean the house.” –Islamorada Girl

“I’m strongly in favor of the ‘Edda dumps her dead fish of a boyfriend’ storyline, but I’m not in favor of it being so boring.” –monkey.dave

And special recognition needs to go to these two comments from faithful reader Rusty. They managed to repulse even my wife, who’s a professional sex educator:

“Dr. Jeff looks haggard because he suddenly realized he’s been banging Mary Worth. ‘Put it in there, Jeff. Now isn’t that comfy? Now start moving it in and out. That’s right, sexual intercourse is one of God’s gifts to us all.'” –Rusty

“Sally is turning down a chance to be manipulated by the slenderest hands on the planet. He could probably get his entire reed-like forearm up in there.” –Rusty

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So I’m going away tomorrow for the weekend, and was hoping to polish Friday comics off before bed, but here it is after 1 am and the King Features strips are all down (have we angered you, O Chennux?). So, you’ll get three day’s worth of comics when I get back Sunday, or maybe four days on Monday at some point. Happy weekend!

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As Monday draws to a close, why not kick back and relax with this week’s top comment?

“I think my favorite thing about the last two MT strips has been the incessant apologizing. ‘Oh, I’m so SORRY that I have to kick your door down.’ ‘No, I’M sorry that you had to break into my house.’ ‘Oh, no, I’M sorry that I have to punch you in the face.’ I would say that they’re being ironic. But in a world where little girls can catch illness of the puppy, I just don’t believe that irony has been invented yet.” –A New Day

And then pour down some icy cold COTW runners-up?

“I think it’s hilarious that the hopeless degenerate Haley’s idea of drug-fueled mayhem is the absurdly wholesome suggestion to ‘go look at the art.’ It’s clear why Alan is so outraged; he’s all, ‘No, let’s go to the nursing home and read to visually impaired seniors!'” –Violet

“I also like the fact that, in addition to them not using drug lingo or real drug paraphernalia, neither one of them appears to actually be high.” –20 Miles From the City

“Hey, Mark? Ever hear of a little something called a ‘search warrant’? Or ‘home invasion’? Or ‘knocking’?” –The Spectacular Spider-Brick

“‘I’m sure you did a great job, Mary — as always!’ = ‘Will you please shut the fuck up about this?'” –cheech wizard

“What intrigues me is how polite Mark is. It’s like he’s the Amy Vanderbilt of tough guys. He certainly has her ankles.” –gh

“Before we dismiss the lackluster denounment of the pot-dealing neighbors, remember the wonderful arc of strips with Abbey and the yellow room — the only instance in which paint drying wasn’t just exciting, but erotic.” –Little Guy

“Blood Cargo really is a great title, though. It’s the only thing in this strip that remotely has any life to it. Or possibly ravenous zombie pirate un-life.” –SFMarcus

“Am I the only one that thinks that Ruby might be Lu Ann’s real mother? Am I the only one that cares? No, wait. I don’t care either.” –mafketis

“Whoever was wondering how Lynn could possibly continue greasing the plot wheels, look no further than the oil reserve trapped in Weed’s hair. That boy’s scalp looks like the Middle East. And I’m not just saying that because I dream of him and Michael getting hit with a missile, although, wink.” –RaJ

“I don’t know if that puppy is housebroken, but Mark had better be sure that he’s shirtbroken.” –Tom Bombadil

“Oh, Jeff. Do NOT get between the woman and her meddling. It’ll be like those bear attack videos when some dumb camper thinks it would be cute to hug a bear cub. I smell a mauling in the wind … a mauling of sensible advice, that is.” –rocketbride

“As cartoon Chevalier impersonators go, I still prefer Pepe Le Pew. Sexual harassment notwithstanding, at least he doesn’t have glistening wonky eyes and a sheepish fanged grin that makes him look like he is about to devour your face, but feels bad about it.” –Sharona

“I’m actually reasonably curious to see what becomes of this twist in the Mary Worth storyline. I think that means I’m ready to be euthanized.” –monsieurjohn

As usual on this day of the week, we must give a big sloppy kiss (MWAH!) to everyone who puts a little bit of scratch in the tip jar!

And finally, we must give it up for our advertisers:

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• The secrets of the quest: The quest is under way. Some puzzles have been solved, but greater challenge lies ahead. Show resolve, and you could find great reward. $100,000 in treasure awaits. Join if you dare. Many will try. One will succeed.

To find out more about advertising on this site, click here.