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So, here’s this week’s Comment Of The Week almost-made-its. In case you haven’t noticed, this has pretty much become a regular feature at this point.

“In reality, this is how this conversation would go: ‘Honey, guess what I saw?’ ‘It’s probably some feeble attempt at ingenuity for the idiotic masses, but what?’ ‘A freaking divorce lawyer, you self-righteous piece of crap!'” –reader-who-posts

“Notice how it’s all about La Camerona. ‘I spent 45 minutes of torture inhaling Wilbur’s piercing aroma of Indonesian hair tonic and neglected genital hygiene, wasting my shrewish hectoring on this pathetic nitwit who has gone out and killed himself before he could even get depressed over my emasculation of him!'” –Craigers

“Aldo Kelrast’s death hits especially hard as he was the only character in the Worthiverse that had anything resembling ‘passion’ or ‘basic wants.’ His death is the final proof that in Charterstone simple human emotions are not only undesirable, but deadly.” –Anonymous

“For those reading Cathy this week: What is up with the war against business casual? Did a t-shirt kill her dog or something?” –Shawn Struck

“What kind of cop just strolls in to say, ‘YEP, IT’S SAD, BUT ON THE OTHER HAND, OH WELL.’ I submit that this is not, in fact, a real cop, but instead a stripper that Mary & friends hired for Aldo’s wake. And before you ask what kind of stripper delivers a sermon on the dangers of drinking and driving and doesn’t remove a stitch of clothing, it’s the kind that Mary Worth would hire.” –SarcasticAcid

“As the days pass within the sinister case of Aldo Kelrast, Charterstone Stalker, I feel sorry less for Mary Worth and more for Toby Cameron’s pants.” –Dingo

“I suspect that Anthony will be strangely envious of Grampa’s corpse being, as he is, dead on the inside already.” –michael

“Margo apparently still has it, whatever ‘it’ is.” –LynnyM

On Mark Trail: “Also, for a few days we’ve been watching these bears in the woods and not once have we seen any signs of defecation by either animal. I guess thats the answer to that philosophical question.” –MGArchitect

“OH MY GOD! THERE’S FIRE IN GIL THORP! Fire, I tell you! Fire = adventure! It’s almost a substitute for a coherent plotline!” –leathermessiah

“Planning Eric Mill’s niece’s birthday party takes PREPARATION, dammit. It’s not like she’s planning an invasion of a third world country or anything. There are lots of variables. If any one goes wrong, disaster could strike. For example, what if one of the kids pukes into the whiskey fountain after doing a keg-stand? What are you going to do then? The obvious — start serving up shots straight from the bottle. But there have to be fresh bottles and chilled shot glasses immediately available. Planning, people! Planning!” –hogenmogen

“On the FBOFW site, they animate the comics. Granted, this animation frequently consists of nothing more than characters blinking, but the idea is that is makes them seem more ‘alive’. I just use it to scare my little son.” –Zikar

“Today Toby and Chinbeard finally realize the life-truth that Aldo knew all along: The best sex is always with the totally wrong people.” –AppleGirl

“Today’s edition [of RMMD] is, as is par for the course, awesome. No, I don’t know who those people are. (And you don’t either, so stop acting like you do.) But I can tell that they’re totally awesome! Will there be a tie-in between these lowlifes and the egregious purse-napping June suffered a few days ago? Who knows? But I’m guessing this: ADVENTURE!!!!” –Fred P.

“In the way in which young people can be clueless as to the (ick) continuing sexual activities of their progenitors and elders, Gina is so proud to make it crystal clear to the old biddies who made her dinner and cleared her plates that she’s leaving to ‘do it,’ while oblivious that Margo has just returned form a day-long brunch ‘date,’ and Tommie is still satisfied from scorning and humiliating Ted just the other day.” –ohyes

“Normal people would use the guns, but [The Phantom] is a strip in a paper where kids can read it, and they have to learn ‘family values,’ such as punching people and throwing them through windows instead of shooting them.” –hogenmogen

“It is entirely possible that Spider-Man is a cartoon strip which doesn’t actually have a ‘best character.'” –Fred P.

Also, faithful reader Dadzilla sent me this picture of his encounter with a bear statue. The statue didn’t understand Dadzilla’s hostility.

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Off for a weekend trip for family fun. New comics Tuesday. To discuss while I’m gone: Josh’s many vacations: Lame or stoopid?

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This is getting to be a regular thing, but once again I present to you this week’s almost-made-it contenders for the Comment of the Week.

“Judging by Spider-Man’s continued ineptness at crime-fighting in this strip, this may very well be the end of him. I mean, he’s having trouble taking down the evil butler, what’s he gonna do against his worst enemy? Die, I suspect.” –Debt On

“Clearly, Hi and Lois are just putting on a good face for baby Trixie. In reality, the fact that he didn’t get the raise means they are all going to be out on the street and the only real estate Lois will be selling is her ass.” –Gryph

On TDIET: “The incredibly weird tone of the captions doesn’t help dispel the whole ‘written by a jaunty serial killer’ vibe of the strip.” –Christopher

“I think Aldo will be a sloppy drunk. Heck, he’s a sloppy sober.” –AppleGirl

“If Aldomania doesn’t end with Aldo shrieking maniacally, a bottle of Bombay in one hand and Mary’s head in the other, backlit by the flames of the burning pyre that is Charterstone, I for one am going to be dissapointed.” –Monkey’s Paw

“Truly, in the comic pages, characters seldom suffer fatal consequences from assaults/dog attacks/cliff-falls/beekeeper potshots. While this may be a comfort for Molly aficionados, I consider it a horrible shortcoming in For Better or For Worse.” –Fred P.

“You have to smile when Aldo says (out loud), ‘This is more like it!’ Who among us hasn’t experienced that first soft glow of false confidence that comes from angry binge drinking?” –smacky

“I was wondering what the hell that roof is made of, and then it came to me … gingerbread. I’d have a inspector come look at the house. Just not a hungry one.” –mndean

“For a little fun, try reading the TDIET ‘commercial’ out loud. It’s like two boxcars of adjectives ran into each other, and this is what came out.” –Zikar

“Resist the temptation to fall for Molly. Mark Trail uses compelling animal characters to draw in unsuspecting readers. You stay because you hope that this time, finally, at long last, Mark Trail will meet his demise. Then the actually interesting animal characters are never heard from again, and Mark Trail goes on to another self-righteous adventure … There was a great cat character a couple of years ago, I have never gotten over it.” –Clyde

“Seeing Aldo plunge off of a cliff is a great way to ring in the Jewish New Year! L’shana Tova, Aldo. But soon, I fear, ‘L’chaim’ would be ironic.” –Marc

“All I can say about Mary Worth is — worst city planners ever. ‘Hey, you know what this quaint residential district needs? A big-ass gaping chasm.'” –Raznor

“In Mary Worthland, even the bumper stickers are dull and verbose. The political ones must be fascinating: ‘Considering all factors, although I continue to have certain reservations about aspects of his domestic and foreign policies, and after weighing the arguments advanced by his opponent, the junior senator from the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, I urge you to vote for President George W. Bush in his campaign for re-election in 2004. Thank you for your kind attention.'” –Von Zeppelin