Comment of the Week

Tune in tomorrow as Rev. Croom embarks on a new life of selective observance. He'll dine and dash (thou shalt not steal), covet Herb's wife, murder Jamaal, and make a graven image, but he'll at least call his mom to wish her a happy birthday (honor thy father and mother). The funnies haven't been this theologically bold since Judge Parker financed the construction of a giant needle big enough for a dozen camels to thread.

Abram Beazer

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Apartment 3-G, 2/16/05

This is quickly becoming one of my favorite features of Apartment 3-G: the Wildly Overacted Margo Reaction Shot. “The public library? Are you insane?

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Judge Parker, 2/15/05

“No, I don’t think you’re listening to me, Harman. She’s an American. A white American. We all know that those crazy-ass Mexican ‘laws’ don’t apply to her!”

Maybe our hero would be having more luck if he were actually talking to someone from the U.S. State Department, rather than Australian Prime Minister John Howard. Also, I like to see that the State Department is being tight-fisted with my tax dollars, since it clearly hasn’t replaced the phones in its offices since 1987.

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Hi and Lois, 2/14/05

When I read this installment of Hi and Lois in the newspaper, I thought that there could be no greater horror than the sight of Hi making what appear to be “bedroom eyes” at Lois. Then I downloaded the colorized version of the comic, only to be confronted with inky blackness of the heart-shaped candy box that Hi has purchased, which I presume signifies some sort of S&M relationship between the two of them. I’d cry “But what about the children?” except that I’m reasonably sure that no children actually read Hi and Lois.

Trying to avert my mind away from the vision of Hi and Lois in fetish gear, I note that I’m not the only person with a home-based business who’s sometimes still wearing a robe when their partner comes home from the office. Of course, in Lois’ case, it just makes it all the easier to quickly change into … damn it, that didn’t work.