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Froggie went a-courtin’

Beetle Bailey, 4/29/07

The last four panels of this strip make up one of the saddest and most poignant little vignettes of homoerotic longing you’ll ever see. Denied their one outlet of physical contact, Beetle and Sarge take a long, wordless walk away from the base that defines their lives, through the countryside, through an enormous ice field in the middle of the city, and finally to some incredibly starry place of refuge. C’mon, guys, you’re miles away from anyone. You can at least let your hands touch.

Family Circus, 4/29/07

I am an unapologetically misanthropic bastard, but even I’m not such a sneering, above-it-all crank that I will hate on this cartoon. I will state now and for the record that I am and always have been pro-hugging. However, I do question the “silent performance” selling point of hugs that I’ve highlighted for you above. Is the fact that hugs are relatively quiet really one of their advantages over other forms of affection? Is their silence to be understood as their differentiator from loud, sloppy tongue kissing or boisterous slaps on the back? What if you and your intended hugging target are wearing raincoats, or pleather clothing, resulting in hugs that are squeaky? I’m all for hugs, but I’m just not sold on this angle, is what I’m saying.

Judge Parker, 4/29/07

Cedric is being remarkably blasé about the fact that his wife is a crazy crazy stalking lady, and whoever the word balloon on the right is coming from is way too ready to file her away under “good stalker,” but this cartoon is eight kinds of awesome for Neddy’s “Uh.. define insanely!” line. “Holy cow … I just got here” is a good runner up. “I mean, I was planning on cutting a swath through every married domestic in the Île-de-France région, but 48 hours a little fast even for me.”

Doodles by Mac and Sack, 4/29/07

I’m not going to get into the fact that this stupid damn koala (who is apparently named “Bosco” for some reason) has gotten himself tangled up in yet another larger, meaner beast’s digestive tract, or that, I wouldn’t have chosen Benedict Arnold as an archetypical liar (though I admit that his traitorous behavior probably involved a certain degree of dissimulation), or that what the Lying Lion is doing looks less like lying and more like smugly contemplating how exactly he’s going to prepare Bosco — in a nice white wine reduction sauce, perhaps — before devouring him. No, I want to point out, with disgust and disdain, the “what’s missing” panel, which I won’t even dignify with the name “puzzle.” Hmm, I wonder what’s wrong with this lion? Right number of toes … full, lustrous mane … two eyes … a tail … nope, I’m not seeing it.

Mark Trail, 4/29/07

God, first birds, now frogs. Sunday Mark Trails are a never-ending stream of filthy animal porn. I like to imagine that the formulation “a little romancing” was the end result of lengthy Pibgorn-style battle with the editors over acceptable content.

101 responses to “Froggie went a-courtin’”

  1. Uncle Lumpy
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:10 pm [Reply]

    Josh -

    Way to go with the circumflex over the “ÃŽ” in “ÃŽsle de France.” Most comics snarkers don’t have the obsessive attention to detail that makes this site great.

  2. Joe Bftsplk
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:16 pm [Reply]

    I admit I don’t follow these things too closely. So I’m risking asking a stupid question here, but, has Beetle ever been drawn wearing that style of hat before?

  3. Jym
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:17 pm [Reply]

    =v= Mark Trail: I guess Elrod prefers drawing exotic rainforest treefrogs rather than the all-American variety.

    P.S.: I got my [Margo! Boxcar! Saturn!] shirt ‘n’ mug and have been attempting to explain myself all day.

  4. Chubby Haggis
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:18 pm [Reply]

    I for one am proud to denounce huggers and their twisted worldview that requires hugging be performed at each measurable change in the configuration of a social interaction.

  5. Non-Shannon
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:18 pm [Reply]

    Good grief. I just watched Tideland, and now this?? Between the cartoon lion’s missing genitals and the embalmed corpse of Jeffrey Lebowski, I’ve had enough creeping out in one day for the entire week!

  6. Doug Puthoff
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:19 pm [Reply]

    “Silent Performance” some as if it had come out of “Viagra” ad, which seems logical considering Bil’s advanced age.

  7. ColoZ
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:19 pm [Reply]

    What’s missing?

    My first thought was “the belly of the beast.”

  8. Artist formerly known as Ben
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:20 pm [Reply]

    BB: Is the chaplain ready to consecrate the Snorkel-Bailey union?

    FC: Hugs also have “no batteries required” going for them. So that’s a money saver for Thel.

    DZ: The maze panel is less disturbing, if rather more disgusting, if you see the next panel as also coming after in chronological order. See? The lion defecated Bosco out whole and unharmed. With a cute little red cap, even!

  9. SecretMargo
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:20 pm [Reply]

    Wow, do I know how to end a thread or what? Ahh, well c’est la vie, I suppose…

    re MT: Perhaps the first draft included the phrase “froggy-style fuckathon” as a subtle nod to the efforts of his colleagues at Sally Forth and Judge Parker.

  10. Rusty
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:25 pm [Reply]

    I had the privilege of watching one of the Walker kids testify in court the other week, he was a witness in a criminal case. Anyway, when asked what he does, he replied that he was a free lance cartoonist and also worked on his father’s strip Beetle Baily. After testifying he came and sat down nearby me, I now wish I had leaned over and asked him what’s the deal with all the unrequited homosexual yearining between Sarge and Beetle?

  11. Andy
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:26 pm [Reply]

    I also hate the hug, mainly because the only people who ever want to hug are the absolute last people you’d ever want to hug.

    Wait a minute.

    If you’ll excuse me, I have an email to Al Scaduto that I need to write.

  12. Uncle Lumpy
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:26 pm [Reply]

    I’m all on tenterhooks for the Comments of the Week! F5. . .F5. . .F5. . .F5. . .F5. . .

    What!? “Bandwidth Limit Exceeded!?” Damn, how’d that happen?

  13. Doug Puthoff
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:26 pm [Reply]

    Today’s BB strip reminded me of that Minute Maid commercial a few years back that featured Popeye and Bluto bicycling together and ignoring Olive Oyl.

  14. reader-who-posts
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:32 pm [Reply]

    JP: That would have been a great phone call. “Cedric honey? You know that bitch that you’re sleeping with? I was stalking her today and I think she’s in trouble! No, not from me, but some ruffians. Yeah, I know I’m crazy and stalking her, but I’m being honest. I swear!”

    RMMD: I like the fact that Mr. Avery hasn’t bought new luggage since 1975.

    Curtis: I once had a dream where I was a banana running around chasing donuts, but I don’t think that’s what Gunk had in mind.

    FC: Many readers were requesting this be reprinted. These are the same readers who have Precious Moments figurines all over their homes. And they are probably Pluggers too.

    Spider-Man: Somehow that damn brick transferred Peter’s Spider-sense to Mary Jane. It also appears to have transferred his annoying habit of thinking the obvious.

  15. shane shiner
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:32 pm [Reply]

    That Doodles is the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen.

  16. Austin
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:35 pm [Reply]

    Come on! I believe the “What’s Missing” in the Doodles comic is a hoop that the lion is jumping through. It is also being held by the stereotypically drawn circus man. I somehow figured that out this morning and I was hella hungover. Although, it did take me a few minutes, I will give you that.

  17. sally
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:35 pm [Reply]

    This being Paris and all, I am so hoping that Angela is following the car, papparazzi-style, and that this ride will end in tears against a column in a tunnel somewhere. But this being Judge Parker, I am doomed to disappointment.

  18. Poteet
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:36 pm [Reply]

    Arrrrrgh. For the first time in several years, my stomach and I had a violent disagreement this evening regarding the proper direction of food travel, and afterward I dragged myself to the computer while trying to recover. First I looked up the Sunday FW and saw Darrin’s nose on prominent grim display, and now I get to see a huge lion about to barf up a live koala, complete with an “out” sign. I’m going back to bed.

  19. Moon Mullins
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:39 pm [Reply]

    Josh, the way your highlight circle is drawn reminds me of the way kids draw farts coming out of rear ends, and it is perfectly placed behind Dolly’s behind. With the words “silent performance” inside the stench bubble and you have a great rendering of an “SBD” (‘silent but deadly’ fart for those of you from other regions).

  20. Kenny
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:40 pm [Reply]

    15. Shane – 100% agreed… that Doodles, is and forever will be that “thing that made my year” 2007. It was my birthday yesterday, and so far… this is the greatest piece of work I’ve seen at this age!

  21. Mechanist
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:40 pm [Reply]

    Today’s FW was an excecise in misleading the reader.

    Bang! Zoom! Planets exploding and rockets flying phallicly into the reader’s face! Darren and Whatsername must have FINALLY done it! Must’ve been damn good too! But no, this is Funktown. It’s just yet another dramatization of someone’s silent misery.

  22. dammit sami
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:43 pm [Reply]

    I19. Moon Mullins – Heh. Totally. I thought the exact same thing. The mean older sister pulled poor, unloved Jeffy in for what he believed was a brief, sweet moment of human affection, only to zing him with the classic SBD. Hahaha. Good one, Dolly.

  23. Mnemonica
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:44 pm [Reply]

    My margoboxcarsaturn package showed up in the mail today! Um, there’s no mail delivery Sunday, right? That means my boxcaring (and box-carrying) postman delivered it to the wrong house, and some thoughtful neighbor finished the delivery him- or herself. This actually happens all the time. Our mail carrier is a saturn, but the neighbors are nice.

    Anyway, then I had to explain it to my husband.

  24. Stuart P. Bentley
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:45 pm [Reply]

    Wait, they’re daring kids to use their imagination to draw something as freeform as… a hula hoop?! What kind of kid can do anything apart from draw two circles?

  25. heartbacon
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:47 pm [Reply]

    Hmm… good thing someone pointed out that the lion was missing a ring it was supposed to be jumping through. I would have just connected the lines on either side. Lamest “puzzle” ever.

    Also… is that last joke an innocent pun on root beer, or is there an outrageous hidden message about working class drunkenness in there?

  26. Anonymous
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:48 pm [Reply]

    I would like to unfortunately point out that the lion’s mouth is “Out.” I’m not sure I want to know what “In” was. Crazy koala/monkey/lion three-way perversions aside, it still makes my skin crawl. I really hope the lion just was sitting down after a long day and whoops, there goes a koala, because the other way is Wrong.

  27. SecretMargo
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:49 pm [Reply]

    16: But Austin, witness the look of knowing intimacy the two of them are sharing! You can almost hear the lion thinking, “Oh you scamp, you think you’re being saucy and coy, but one more tug and I’ll show you who the real ‘ringmaster’ is in this relationship.”

  28. Steve S
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:49 pm [Reply]

    I wish all mazes were as easy as saying “I’ll exit through the lion’s intestines!”

  29. Dasmarius
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:50 pm [Reply]

    The message in Family Circus today is that hugs are ONLY for people one year old and up. The lesson: don’t hug your babies. Ever. Needy little twits.

  30. Jake
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:54 pm [Reply]

    How about the lion tamer’s hand? that shit is gone!

  31. Buck Ripsnort
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:57 pm [Reply]

    Hula Hoops? Come now, the “What’s Missing?” is answered in the panel right above! The lyin’ lion is lacking his Inner Koala, and he misses it terribly.

  32. Jake
    April 29th, 2007 at 10:58 pm [Reply]

    oh, snap! i think i just busted this case wide open! josh, you can be as cynical as you want, but the real thing missing from that there picture is the white man’s WHIP he uses to keep the proud african lion down.

    and rightly so.

  33. Buck Ripsnort
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:02 pm [Reply]

    And Beetle’s, “You deserve a hard time!” sounds so much dirtier in the context of The Love That Dare Not Ask Nor Tell Its Name.

  34. Artist formerly known as Ben
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:06 pm [Reply]

    #14, Re: Curtis, maybe that is what Gunk meant, and Curtis just wasn’t comfortable sharing on that level with his inbred Caucasian pal.

    #13, Stephen Colbert did a whole story on that commercial when he was still on The Daily Show. He went to a strip club that didn’t serve orange juice and also didn’t have a lot of gay men hanging around. What more proof do you need?

  35. Spiny Norman
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:08 pm [Reply]

    MT: Funny, the “spring peepers” around here tend to keep fairly quiet as they lurk in the thick vegetation. Of course, that’s probably because of the Neighborhood Watch…

  36. NotGodot
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:10 pm [Reply]

    If I did it right, click my name to see the original, uncensored version of today’s Beetle Bailey.

  37. Sabrechick
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:19 pm [Reply]

    John C. Freemont (previous thread)

    Heywood Banks rules!!! You forgot to mention the “chorus” of pig grunts that makes this song so fun to sing along with. A few years ago a friend of mine and I went to a HB show and bought one of his tapes. The “pigs” song came on and of course we were singing along at the top of our lungs with the windows wide open. We were stopped at a light during the chorus, both grunting along and laughing, then looked next to us to see a cop car – with the cop glaring at us trying to figure out if we were insulting him or not.

    P.S. Thanks for the kind thoughts regarding my fencing club – we are actually looking at a building to buy and renovate specifically for fencing. It will be a lot of work but it will be pretty cool (and yes bladerunner we WILL have springy wood floors)

    Happy snarking -

  38. Mibbitmaker
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:20 pm [Reply]

    Angela is an angel all right, Neddy. An angel of vengeance and retribution. One false move – so much as an unintentional mini-firt – and Angie’ll get some other punks to terrorize you; got it, Ned? Good.

  39. anthus
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:22 pm [Reply]

    #25 – as Oscar Wilde once said, “work is an affliction of the drinking class.”

    I think he also said, “Geez, when are Sarge and Beetle Bailey going to get it on already?”

  40. Len
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:23 pm [Reply]

    #18 — Poteet, the phrase “barf a koala” falls trippingly off the tongue. I may try singing it to the “pina colada” song…

    Give me a pina colada,
    or I will barf a koala!

    Or you can bite Darren’s nose.

    Appropos of nothing much, am I on bad blotter acid, or is it significant that Cedric’s wife is named Angela, and I think the street-walker doctorate student was named Angel? (I don’t want to look it up!) Does Mrs. Cedric put on a blonde wig and leopard print clothes to do her stalking?

    Hope your tummy is better, Poteet!

  41. Jake
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:24 pm [Reply]

    wait hold on!

    my “and rightly so” meant it’s good that the whip was MISSING. NO WHIP=GOOD.

    AUGH FINALS ARE FRYING MY BRAIN

  42. fizzy logic
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:24 pm [Reply]

    I’m more of a comic-strip gal than a comic-book gal, but does Cedric look like Bruce Wayne in today’s strip, or is it just me? Maybe it’s just because he’s so studly, saving the girls the way he did and never breaking a sweat wearing his tux. Is evening wear appropriate for the time of day? So many questions. And Neddy still wearing that margoing beret.

  43. M. Bouffant
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:33 pm [Reply]

    Shouldn’t Sarge & Beetle be doing “hard time” in the stockade for their continuous pugilism? I know you’re not supposed to hit officers, but I don’t think sergeants are supposed to beat on the grunts either….
    BTW; It may’ve been mentioned before, but to me “Charterstone” sounds like some sort of rehab place, not just condos. Maybe Vera is Britney Spears with a bad wig.

  44. puzzled
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:35 pm [Reply]

    Am I the only sick bastard who thought that what was missing was the lion’s dong?

  45. Power of 1000 Lemons
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:37 pm [Reply]

    The lion in Doodle Zoo barely even looks like a lion – did Mac and/or Sack even do any research before shitting this one out? Also, what’s with the mincing pose? It looks like they combined a lion’s DNA with Bruce Vilanch’s.

  46. Spiny Norman
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:37 pm [Reply]

    FOOB: I must be missing the point today (not that there’s ever much a point anymore). Is it that John has mistaken another patient for his wife–or that he’d rather be guilty of dental malpractice on his nearest and dearest than on some random patient? And what’s up with Ellly’s expression in the last panel? It’s as if John’s rant, “Everything that could go wrong…went wrong!!…It’s a good thing I was working on my wife!” hits just a little too close to their bedroom chatter.

  47. Toonhead!
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:38 pm [Reply]

    Actually Uncle Lumpy you’re not supposed to use any diacritical marks on capital letters.

  48. Spiny Norman
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:40 pm [Reply]

    #44: Nope, that was where my mind went, too. I’m a bad, bad person.

    And that should be “much OF a point,” not “much a point” in my last post.

  49. SecretMargo
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:44 pm [Reply]

    40, Len: Sacré merde, you’re right!

    (Obligatory footnote: http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/fun/judgeparker.asp?date=20070325)

    That means Dingo was right, too! This plot is snapping together like a Foobish jaw on a fragile crown. I hope the punques sans vêtements et moralité turn out to be the “sucre on the side” that almost prevented Randy from winning the election.

  50. p.
    April 29th, 2007 at 11:46 pm [Reply]

    42: I was thinking Clark Kent because of the glasses and Brylcreemed hair, but the tux fits the Wayne modus operandi much better. The car, however, fits neither of them, as the inside chairs appear to be covered with those plastic furniture covers and the outside seems to have been randomly splashed with red and black paint while bearing a superficial resemblance to my mom’s station wagon c. 1988.

  51. the disembodied voice
    April 30th, 2007 at 12:10 am [Reply]

    Did the *crunch* sound effect in Sunday’s FBOFW bother anyone else?

    ARGH.

  52. Octal
    April 30th, 2007 at 12:13 am [Reply]

    16: Oh, thank GOD. Although, that made me notice the ringmaster and the positioning of his hand, so maybe that makes it even worse.

  53. RaJ
    April 30th, 2007 at 12:17 am [Reply]

    The koala’s name is clearly a reference to the painter Hieronymus Bosch, known in Spain as El Bosco; the koala represents the sinner who suffers eternally (also see: a The Garden of Earthly Delights). In other words: he’s inside a lion because he betrayed the Lord. That jerk.

    I swear that Judge Parker is always on the cusp of becoming an episode of Cowboy Bebop: I can totally imagine Neddy and Angela trading gunfire in a cathedral, while Cedric, victim to a hail of gunfire, dies in Neddy’s arms. While Abbey, um, polishes her metal cyborg arm. I’m just saying, it could happen (please?)

  54. magic8ball
    April 30th, 2007 at 12:36 am [Reply]

    #41 Jake: good luck with Finals. I just finished mine, so I feel your pain.

  55. stewart
    April 30th, 2007 at 12:46 am [Reply]

    And of course, the female spring peeper’s mating call is “Y’allllllllllllll! I am SOOOOOOOOOO drunk!”

  56. Tomcat
    April 30th, 2007 at 1:28 am [Reply]

    Josh, what is it with you and all this ‘homoerotic’ crap? Dirk was never attracted to Brad in any way at all. He simply wanted Brad dead. This is simply symbolism that Sarge and Beetle cannot get along ever.

  57. Daniel
    April 30th, 2007 at 1:46 am [Reply]

    #2: No, the hats weren’t always like that. They’ve only been drawn like that the past 3 weeks or so, and when the comic was drawn in the 50′s though the edges were sharper.

    I hate the way the hats are being drawn now. I think they look quite ugly.

  58. Mike
    April 30th, 2007 at 2:21 am [Reply]

    Doodles: Truly “too hot for TV”

  59. Plasma
    April 30th, 2007 at 3:42 am [Reply]

    I would like to nominate Anonymous #29′s comment for next week’s COTW. It made me laugh long and hard.

  60. Plasma
    April 30th, 2007 at 3:44 am [Reply]

    Whoops, by #29 I meant #26. D’oh.

  61. Chubby Haggis
    April 30th, 2007 at 6:40 am [Reply]

    more human sexuality gone tragically wrong in “The Wizard of Id” today

  62. Sheilagh
    April 30th, 2007 at 6:43 am [Reply]

    Austin, you’re a genius! *I* thought you were supposed to draw the lion’s back and his genitals. I mean, they do have them… and they’re located pretty much right where that blank is.

  63. Sheilagh
    April 30th, 2007 at 6:44 am [Reply]

    Also, in the Doodle Zoo, is that lion fixing to take a big satisfying crap or what? I mean, LOOK at that pose…

  64. True Fable
    April 30th, 2007 at 6:57 am [Reply]

    #53 RaJ: Any mention of Cowboy Bebop wins a big cheer from me. Put Neddy in Faye Valentine’s outfit and have her work it like a claw. Or just work it, I’m good with that.

  65. Dean Booth (Tyler Bid Page)
    April 30th, 2007 at 6:58 am [Reply]

    BB: In the last panel, it looks to me like Sarge and Beetle have become ghosts in A3G Luann’s studio.

  66. Carmichael the Polar Bear
    April 30th, 2007 at 7:03 am [Reply]

    My inner 7-year-old instantly decided that “Silent Performance” meant Dolly cut a silent but deadly fart, which is the only proper reponse when one’s little brother hugs one.

  67. Hilo Hello
    April 30th, 2007 at 7:13 am [Reply]

    The Lying Lion looks like he just let one.

    Also, “hard time,” lolololololololol.

  68. Klipper
    April 30th, 2007 at 7:14 am [Reply]

    I believe that top-hat-wearing-shrew-thing is a magician with a light saber. A rather phallic light saber he’s using to cut a swath through the midsection of that lion. What’s missing? Nothing as far as I’m concerned.

  69. insolenttomato
    April 30th, 2007 at 7:22 am [Reply]

    #26: Considering the lion’s pose (and I cannot believe nobody else has commented on this yet) I’m kinda thinking that’s how the koala wound up inside him. His full-on bending over, combined with his saucy expression, doesn’t so much say “lying lion” or “satisfying dump” as it does “power bottom.” Oh la la!

  70. Tukla in Iowa
    April 30th, 2007 at 8:06 am [Reply]

    Doodles:
    Q: What do highway workers love to drink?
    A: Route beer.

    What? I don’t get it. Or am I supposed to be pronouncing “route” as if it rhymes with “root”?

  71. Hogen Mogen
    April 30th, 2007 at 8:23 am [Reply]

    “48 hours a little fast even for me”

    Point of order, Mr. Popeness, but since Abbey and Neddy landed, it has not yet been 24 hours. Mind boggling, I know, but true. They landed, they partied, they went to the school, they missed their subway stop, and here we are.

  72. Citric
    April 30th, 2007 at 8:26 am [Reply]

    This “nice Canadian” stereotype is really getting out of hand. Even our insane jealous psycho stalkers are unfailingly polite.

  73. Pelagius
    April 30th, 2007 at 8:31 am [Reply]

    Having warmed up with the birds and the frogs, Mark Trail is moving on to some hot Mark-on-Cherry action today! Hot diggity dog!

  74. schlimmerkerl
    April 30th, 2007 at 8:33 am [Reply]

    A sergeant is not a comissioned officer, but they’re not permitted to strike other enlisted personnel, in any case.

    “Sodas” indeed. the only reason we went to the PX was beer.

  75. Old Bean
    April 30th, 2007 at 8:42 am [Reply]

    After soaking so long in the stomach acid of various predators, ‘Bosco’ has probably lost all sense of touch. That little frown is the frown of a nerve-deadened koala who knows he’ll never again feel what it is to be hugged, and the silent performance it brings.

  76. stinky pete
    April 30th, 2007 at 8:47 am [Reply]

    My 18 year old, who is getting ready for prom & high school graduation, has lately been heard to make comments like those in the last panel of FOOB. I’ve learned to just smile, nod, and say “yep.”

  77. Chupper
    April 30th, 2007 at 9:34 am [Reply]

    I’m pretty sure that the “get one today” word balloon in FC is actually just a piece of Mark Trail dialogue slightly further off the mark than usual. Right Hook o’ Justice? Get one today!

  78. Buck Ripsnort
    April 30th, 2007 at 9:49 am [Reply]

    4/30 Pluggers: So skinny Plugger-wives eat fat foods, while ordering “diet” foods for their fat husbands. Tough love? No, judging from carniverous hubby’s expression, the tough love comes when he devours his wife on the sidewalk.

  79. no springs
    April 30th, 2007 at 9:51 am [Reply]

    Re DZ: I think the monkey is responsible for Bosco’s plight this week. He’s never forgiven him for ripping off his artwork. Course, it looks like Bosco stole his hat after escaping from the lion (or being defecated, depending on the skill and/or apathy of the reader).

  80. Deborah
    April 30th, 2007 at 9:54 am [Reply]

    I’m thinking that the “what’s missing” segment of Doodles is indeed the most artistically challenging feature ever in this strip.

    Oh, sure, at first I thought “lion’s penis” and had several perverse moments visualizing the drawing thereof, and then I had to go wash my brain out with soap. But then I realized that no, you’re supposed to draw the penis in the act of insertion. The little ones have an entire satisfied lioness to draw. Yay for them.

  81. Gabriel M
    April 30th, 2007 at 10:04 am [Reply]

    Not ONCE does Cedric open his mouth throughout the entire set of Judge Parker panels. Looks like he’s “throwing his voice” so that the headrest appears to be saying all those things. Cool — a handsome, barrel-chested international ventriloquist. I’ll bet that’s the first time anyone’s heard that sentence.

  82. Stranger…
    April 30th, 2007 at 11:47 am [Reply]

    Ok, now I see how that guy got the job as Lion “Tamer”. It’s obvious that we are supposed to draw the Lion being held up by the tamer grasp, which is a feat by itself…

  83. Poteet
    April 30th, 2007 at 11:59 am [Reply]

    # 40 — Thanks, Len, I do feel better now. And I wondered the same thing about Angela/Angel, so maybe I was on the bad acid also.

    # 44 — Puzzled, I definitely fit the “sick” part last night, and the answer was no.

  84. Mam'zelle H.
    April 30th, 2007 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

    I nominate “Uh.. define insanely!” for the t-shirt design suggestion bonanza!

  85. Grumpy McFly
    April 30th, 2007 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

    #70, ‘Route’ is pronounced ‘Root’ on occasion. i.e. ‘Get your kicks…on Route 66…’

  86. Flan
    April 30th, 2007 at 1:26 pm [Reply]

    BB: I like the allegory of the 2nd to last panel. Beetle and Sarge know that by acknowledging the white-hot man love that burns in their loins, they walk on thin ice as witnessed by the frozen moonshadowed lake they walk across.

    And for those of you who’ll complain about a frozen lake in late April, I’ll point out that Beetle Bailey a strip based on emotions and romanticism, not facts.

  87. DarkHorse02GT
    April 30th, 2007 at 2:21 pm [Reply]

    I love how Bill Keane’s signature is talking to us in Family Circus.

  88. Elegist
    April 30th, 2007 at 4:25 pm [Reply]

    As post #17 said, I believe the item missing is a hoop or a whip (see how the lion-tamer’s hand is all grippy and forlorn?). However, my first thought was that “Mac” intended to teach children how to become Furry artists and give the lion a raging boner. I very nearly cried for the youth of the nation.

  89. Elegist
    April 30th, 2007 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

    Ah, shoot. As I keep reading the thread, I see #26 has realized the horrible truth as well: “Mac” is a closet Furry and an “unbirthing” fetishist. No, it’s better that I don’t define that. Keep the brain-bleach in handy when you Google it, for your own sake!

  90. Alex Blase
    April 30th, 2007 at 7:00 pm [Reply]

    Ha! I thought the same thing when I saw Beetle Bailey. I’m really beginning to wonder if all the ggayness in BB isn’t intentional….

  91. Joe Bftsplk
    April 30th, 2007 at 8:17 pm [Reply]

    29 – This annoys me for a different reason. “Recommended for ages 1 to 100 and up!” Just say, “ages 1 and up,” dammit.

    44 – No, you are not. That was the only missing lion-part that I could think of. The hoop is obvious to me now that I’ve read the comments above, but I wouldn’t have gotten there on my own.

  92. alamo
    April 30th, 2007 at 9:09 pm [Reply]

    doodles — i do not have time to read all the comments — sorry – but there is another way out of mr. lion and i think it is a sad commentary on our society that we are unable to deal with this.
    yes bosco could exit through the ears. up the lion’s eustachian tube and through the ear portals.
    what you say, a third option??? no!!!!

  93. Melp
    April 30th, 2007 at 9:25 pm [Reply]

    What’s even more disturbing is that during the ten minutes I spent trying to decipher the artist’s actual intention in the “What’s Missing” panel, I couldn’t stop picturing a fistful of Beastus Maximus.

  94. PapaFrita
    April 30th, 2007 at 9:42 pm [Reply]

    I don’t know if anyone else picked up on this, but the last three panels made me think of Sonic. Beetle and Sarge run through Green Hills Zone, then through the Crystal Egg Zone, and then run through the credits, only to look up at the night sky to see Tails’s spirit in the stars because they didn’t collect every crystal emerald. No? No one?

    Well, FINE. I’m going back to my Game Gear.

  95. heynoni
    May 1st, 2007 at 10:48 pm [Reply]

    Good for you, Elegist. A hoop! Of course! Far from this thread proving the artist to be mad, he’s proved that it is indeed a puzzle not so easy to solve – even by adults.

  96. Omnywrench
    October 14th, 2007 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

    hugs: ribbed for her pleasure.

  97. Niall
    October 17th, 2007 at 2:52 pm [Reply]

    47. Toonhead: Actually, in French, you are supposed to use accents on capital letters. It’s a fairly recent development, admittedly – 15 years or so.

  98. Erik
    September 19th, 2008 at 1:14 am [Reply]

    IT’S A PENIS YOU IDIOT THAT LION IS MISSING IT’S GOD DAMN REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS!!!!

    Just had to say it.

  99. Thinker
    December 3rd, 2008 at 10:15 pm [Reply]

    Just came across this page by chance and…Jesus, what the f#$($&@? Homoerotic meaning in Beetle Bailey strips? Man, I´ve been a Beetle fan for over 40 years, and it always´s been a source for clean nice fun for me! What´s the matter with some people? Does EVERYTHING have to have a homosexual meaning?? You guys disgust me…you ONLY think about homosexual sex, ALL the time, 24/7…you define the whole universe on a sexual view of things…as far as you´re concerned, God, Jesus, the Big Bang, any gesture, any text, and yes any comic strip, is only about sex…pitiful, too pitiful. Now it may AMAZE you guys, but some of us DO NOT think about sex in everything we do and think…a behaviour which used to be called “normal” in saner times…

  100. Jym
    August 6th, 2009 at 1:56 pm [Reply]

    =v= BB: For someone named Thinker, that’s a whole lot of unthinkin’ going on there. Like the time I ruined this one guy’s life by getting him to look at Lyman in that certain way.

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