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Sadly, the strip might actually be too old for a Pauly Shore joke

Slylock Fox, 11/8/12

How much do I love this creepy Six Differences scene? A lot! A lot is how much I love it! I particularly love the contrast in facial expressions — the cake-hog is sporting a manic grin, as if he’s incredibly happy that this wedding’s serve-yourself policy has allowed him to get a big enough piece of cake to meet his needs, at long last. Meanwhile, everyone else there (except the children, too young to understand) are staring at his retreating back with numb horror, and, I assume, in icy silence. Social norms have been violated so egregiously that it’s hard to know what might come next, but I think it’s safe to say that the prominent placement of that terrifyingly large knife is no accident.

Archie, 11/8/12

So I guess we can now peg the date of these Archie reruns to the fall of 1991, since that was when the first crew entered Biosphere 2 and probably was the last time anyone bothered to make any kind of joke about it, unless you count jokes about the 1996 Pauly Shore vehicle Bio-Dome, which, frankly, I don’t. (NEVER FORGET that the Biosphere thingie in Arizona was “Biosphere 2,” a reference to Biosphere 1, which was of course our Earth.) But more important is Mr. Lodge’s expression of implacable evil in the final panel. One would think that a man willing to scurry into an artificially sealed environment just to get away from his daughter’s ne’er-do-well boyfriend would be feeling more sheepish than sinister. Thus, we must assume that Mr. Lodge wants to enter Biosphere 2 not to escape Archie, but to escape the deadly poison gas his scientists have developed that will soon kill Archie and, as a regrettable but unavoidable side effect, all other human life.

Dick Tracy, 11/8/12

Oh, Dick Tracy! Are you trying to win my heart by having a desperate, injured criminal start eating pain patches so he can make one last desperate run at the cops who are closing in on him? Because it’s working pretty well!

237 responses to “Sadly, the strip might actually be too old for a Pauly Shore joke”

  1. Dartpaw86
    November 8th, 2012 at 8:27 am [Reply]

    Oh, Mr. Lodge. Don’t put yourself in the Biosphere, keep Archie in one, far away from human civilization forever.

  2. Dartpaw86
    November 8th, 2012 at 8:28 am [Reply]

    Also… the entire joke is that he doesn’t like Archie? Pretty weak imo.

  3. Bill Peschel
    November 8th, 2012 at 8:31 am [Reply]

    What a coincidence! Marc Maron’s WTF podcast (check it out!) had an interview with him last week. Fascinating cat. He’s still doing standup and doing well now that his 15 minutes are up. Still does his slacker characters when needed.

    And considering that Mr. Lodge is supposed to be incredibly wealthy, rich enough to hire goons to press Archie’s head into a waffle iron, you’d think he doesn’t need to dream about his own private biodome.

  4. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    November 8th, 2012 at 8:34 am [Reply]

    MT – Sheesh, you’d think Cherry would take the news better. Someone in that house gets kidnapped every other day. Just last week, she was freeing the Rusty Unit from kidnappers herself. “Eh, kidnapped, you don’t say? Did they bother to issue any demands this time? And did you try having Andy jump out of the woods, then grabbing their (one and only) gun when they threw it to the ground in surprise?”

    MW- And by “exploring”, you mean engaging in a series of meaningless lesban encounters, don’t you Dawn?

    9CL – For those of you who may have forgotten, Edda is not only a (former) feature ballerina, but also a world class classical musician! So, don’t worry about her! She may have been fired from her day job, but she always has a pianist to fall back on.

  5. Dartpaw86
    November 8th, 2012 at 8:41 am [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#4): @Bill Peschel (#3):

    Heck he can probably pay the Grim Reaper enough money to kill Archie.

  6. KreatureFeatures
    November 8th, 2012 at 8:44 am [Reply]

    So much to love in today’s Gil Thorp: the spasmodic flailing receiver in panel one, the vicious spearing in panel two, the delicate way that Beardie McReferee has tucked the ball under his arm in panel three. If only there was room for a fourth panel of angry parents drunkenly berating the call, we’d have a perfect vignette of a Texas Friday night.

  7. Nate
    November 8th, 2012 at 8:45 am [Reply]

    ‘I would rather give up my life of luxury, my family, and all human contact than see or hear anything about your boyfriend ever again. I would rather be alone for eterniry than risk coming into contact with him. I would rather die than live one more minute in a world where Archie also lives. I’m going to get my revolver and end this misery.’

    ‘Tee hee – oh Daddy!’

  8. Gerry Quinn
    November 8th, 2012 at 8:47 am [Reply]

    Are the humans fighting back at last? Today’s Slylock strongly suggests that humans are finally vigorously reproducing after whatever catastrophe temporarily ceded the world to the animals.

    The cake-hog is most likely an animal in disguise, naively thinking that stealing the special human wedding food will render this marriage forever barren. Meanwhile the bride hides discreetly behind the remainder of the cake. He may already be too late.

  9. CanuckDownSouth
    November 8th, 2012 at 8:51 am [Reply]

    Measles dying in a blazing painkiller-hyped gun-batttle? Nah, done to death. It’ll be an ironic overdose fatality from slurping the patch’s days-worth of medicine, as the strip retools itself into Darwin Awards Illustrated.

  10. Honey Badger, Does not give a shit
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:05 am [Reply]

    MT: Kelly: Ok, enough of that. Hell, I rarely see him anyway. And it’s not like he is a good father. That lame ass job he has doesn’t even bring in that much money. I just hope the body turns up soon so I can at least collect the life insurance.

  11. Diligent Dad
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:05 am [Reply]

    @Nate (#7): What a coincidence! This is exactly how I feel about my daughter’s boyfriend.

  12. Anonymous
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:10 am [Reply]

    Josh, Please change the system clock to EST. I am easily confused.

  13. Alice
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:13 am [Reply]

    Archie: Do we have here, in this rerun, the genesis of Evil Mr. Lodge as featured in the “what if” Life with Archie series?

    Also, what is it with Archie characters and their projectile sweat drops that travel so far away from the body that you can see them even when the character is off-panel? Yes, yes, I know, it’s an artistic convention meant to show that the off-panel character is surprised or, as is probably the case here, outright terrified, at the on-panel character’s punchline. Still, I’d think that, given Lodge’s near-psychotic grin, Veronica’s reaction of horror can be taken as read, rendering her jet-propelled perspiration unnecessary.

    9CL: McEldowney’s obsession with “classical music as erotica” has corrupted me. I had to use the zoom feature on GoComics to determine that the audience members in the last panel are tossing program booklets, not corsets.

  14. Chareth Cutestory
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:16 am [Reply]

    Slylock Fox: Do you find it revealing that two days after the election we see an image of a greedy fat man in a suit stealing half the cake? Open your eyes people! This sort of robbery has been going on ever since the days when medieval lords claimed primae caketis.

  15. Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:20 am [Reply]

    AS-M: Even the mighty Kraven is surprised that someone would have faith in his abilities. When he agreed to do newspaper Spider-Man he assumed his reputation for efficacy would be accordingly reduced.

    BB: Lt. Fuzz’s been Gitmoed! LOL!

    Social norms have been violated so egregiously that it’s hard to know what might come next, but I think it’s safe to say that the prominent placement of that terrifyingly large knife is no accident.

    And, sadly, Slylock won’t even investigate. In the pinkskins want to kill each other, let them. You know how those people (i.e., people) are.

  16. Pozzo
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:21 am [Reply]

    I assume the little kid peeking around the edge of the table is meant to be one the six differences, but I can’t help feeling that he’s in the first picture, but always ducks behind the table just as I look at it. Oops, just missed him again!

  17. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:23 am [Reply]

    MT: “I can’t believe this is happening”? Really, Cherry? Because Mark attracts kidnappers like a chunk of wood attracts termites.

    JP: In a plot filled with ominous storm clouds, a fall off a cliff, a surly innkeeper with a hammer, glowering drug thugs, a bed-hopping skunk, dangerous mountain roads, a large hillbilly with a garroting wire, and an even larger mine-shaft-dwelling drug lord with a chainsaw, the very worst thing to befall Avery is a smashed camera.

  18. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:26 am [Reply]

    @Alice (#13): I had to use the zoom feature on GoComics to determine that the audience members in the last panel are tossing program booklets, not corsets.

    Really? I just assumed it was corsets, given the previous run of strips this week, and given that there really is no joke if they are just throwing their booklets.

    Why does the concert promoter continue to allow Edda ‘n Amos to perform together? Don’t the majority of their concerts end after 5 minutes when they drop their instruments and begin groping each other, followed by Amos falling into a catatonic state while Edda goes right on goin’ on? Why buy a ticket to watch that when you can just go home and watch the video instead?

  19. Danonymous
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:27 am [Reply]

    Veronica spits uncontrollably in all directions anytime Mr Lodge denigrates his daughter’s boyfriend. Mr Lodge is determined to make that clever bit of hypnotherapy count, no matter how slight or nonsensical his insults become.

  20. Dagger
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:30 am [Reply]

    And that’s how Measles got addicted to Oxycontin.

  21. Nehemiah Scudder
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:31 am [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#Y162): It just said, “If you were a robot from the future like me, you would find those comics very entertaining.”

    It sounded a little condescending, if you ask me.

    Well that explains a lot. I never bought into the threat of “evil” robots from the future. Why would a RftF want to be evil? Makes no sense. Condescending, I can understand.

    I suppose it doesn’t make a great movie plot, tho: “Condescending Robots from the Future will come and sneer at you! Be annoyed. Be very annoyed!”

    // Oh noes! Hipsters with positronic brains! We’re doomed!

  22. Liam
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:38 am [Reply]

    A3G-I allowed it to happen because I don’t think Margo cares about being a publicist anymore. I think she’s interested in becoming a tug boat captain this week.

    MT-First it was Rusty and now Mark. When do I get a story where I’m kidnapped.

    MT 2-I’m so worried that he’ll come back.

    MW-I’m sorry Dawn but you will only be allowed to explore heterosexual relationships. Mary won’t allow homosexual relationships.

    Zippy the Pinhead-Sorry Zippy, but there is a man in Baltimore who runs a blog that makes fun of comic strip characters.

  23. Liam
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:39 am [Reply]

    DT-Measles must be in immense pain. The package says “lasts up to three days” not “takes three days”.

  24. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:42 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#21):

    “I’m not evil!!! I’m just programmed that way!!”

    Yup, here’s your problem. Someone set this thing to ‘Evil’.

  25. Marc
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:42 am [Reply]

    9CL- It’s hard to have sex when you’re still holding your program to the special snowflake’s special musical performance. Life is brutal.

    A3G- I wonder what will win out in this impending conflict: Margo’s stone cold bitchiness, Evan’s douchebaggery, Skyler’s naivete, Greg Cooper’s disdain for work, Lu Ann’s utter incompetence, or the blissful abscence of Tommie in this plot?

    Mark Trail- Really Cherry? You’re REALLY surprised that somebody in your family got kidnapped? Next you’re going to tell me that you were surprised when Rusty got his head stuck in the fence of horse stable, AGAIN.

    Mary Worth- Thus began Dawn’s long string of attempted lesbian affairs. The only problem was that she is as horrible with women as she is with men. So no matter what team Dawn tries to play on, she strikes out.

    Funky- It’s funny because Comic book guy is a boring pedophile and Owen is too stupid to do his schoolwork right the first time.

    Luann- Oh hey look, chicks in the bathroom applying gobs of makeup while they talk about the stupidest shit possible. I feel like I’m having this particular case of Deja Vu for the 400th time.

    Archie- Whenever Mr. Lodge appears in Archie, I read his dialogue in the voice of Carter Pewterschmidt from Family Guy. It just seems fitting.

  26. Cloudbuster
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:43 am [Reply]

    @Alice (#13): tossing program booklets, not corsets.

    Huh. It never even occurred to me to look more closely. I just assumed they were tossing their clothing on the stage.

  27. Cloudbuster
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:44 am [Reply]

    Pibgorn: Purple heels with a red and green outfit? Really?

    ASM: It’s not really looking good for the ferociousness of the cats that Spidey, Kraven and the girl are all standing around chatting casually, and the cats aren’t trying to eat anyone.

    FW: You know, Batiuk, it’s not any more entertaining for us than it is for the kid.

  28. sporknpork
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:46 am [Reply]

    Strangely, Mr. Lodge did not mean to say “Archie” but rather “cars”. As you can see, his dentures are sliding out his mouth.

  29. Nehemiah Scudder
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:47 am [Reply]

    BB: Are those supposed to be helmets the two officers are wearing? Who wears a helmet in an office? Maybe they are wearing berets.

    // In any event, they seem to be breaking Army Regs: AR 670-1 Chap. 1 Para 1-10(K)(2): Soldiers will not wear headgear indoors unless under arms in an official capacity or when directed by the commander, such as for indoor ceremonial activities.

    // But wait! “Under arms”. They must be both wearing sidearms! Camp Swampy is obviously under attack! Lt. Fuzz should be thankful for his fortified cubicle.

  30. bbofun
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:57 am [Reply]

    In a comic-book, of course, Measles would gain amazing super-powers from chewing pain patches, and become “PainKiller-the Anesthetic Man.”

    But, this is Dick Tracy. He’ll either die horribly, or be arrested. But, in either case, it’ll be drawn really well (my god, look at that first panel! It’s like something out of an EC horror comic!).

    [80's sitcom music] “He’s Measles, the self-destructive criminal!”

  31. Mikey
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:57 am [Reply]

    MT: I’m sure Mark has at least $1M stashed away given he works for a lucrative, yacht owning outdoors magazine. Now Cherry just has to sell Rusty’s organs on the black market for the other $1M.

  32. morndew
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:57 am [Reply]

    MW- Wilber is so glad she’s going to stay single, because now she can spend more time with hi-aaaaaahhhh!!! LOOK OUT DAWN-HE’S GOING FOR YOUR BOOB!!!!
    So many levels of creepy…

  33. Not Just Any Dipstick
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:59 am [Reply]

    @Mikey (#31): That’s it! That’s it! My new band will be ‘The Rusty Organs’. Genius.

  34. Not Just Any Dipstick
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:00 am [Reply]

    @morndew (#32): Far worse. Wilbur is planning to introduce her to many other ‘new’ things. Anal comes to mind.

  35. Mary Worthless
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:03 am [Reply]

    Dawn is a teenager?!?

    Wow. You can’t tell from her clothes, her attitude, or her friends.

    Her one armed “friend” has got to be a least 5 years older than her and has tons of baggage. Either of her Ask Wendy advisors should tell her to back away from the creep.

    ’nuff said.

  36. Josh
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:07 am [Reply]

    @Anonymous (#12): IF ONLY I KNEW HOW

  37. Wally Winkerbean
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:08 am [Reply]

    I can’t wait for smug comic book guy’s explanation of how strips then evolved to cancer ridden, limbless, time jumping, wastelands of putrid story lines and santicmonious moralizing.

    Maybe in the Sunday version where Mr. Batiuk has more artistic room to roam.

  38. gleeb
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:10 am [Reply]

    Dick: Ho-ho! Afraid that they’ll work too slowly for his agonizing pain is our dope-addled friend Hideous Deformity about to give himself an overdose? I admit I was disappointed that Tracy didn’t kill him outright. The idea of his opioid habit making the pain patches ineffective helped, but now I think I see the final irony. Well done! Now, about the Moon…

    ‘bean: Two new characters: the guys who are constantly hanging around the Komix Shoppe playing videogames. I look forward to Batiuk’s loving attention to their adventures.

    Down the Mineshaft: Uh-oh. Now full of morning scotch, Avery will no doubt allow his anger to best him, ending the deal and his existence on or under Earth.

    Spidey: They’re both shocked. Our Hero because he’s amazed at her faith in Kraven; Kraven because he was going to let her die so he could collect insurance.

    Lola: Ernie Kovacs did it better.

  39. FafMor7
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:10 am [Reply]

    Dick Tracy: Measles will stuff his own mouth full of bandaids before approaching the cops. “Monft mooot! My murrender “. Then Dick and crew will argue about whether it was Mumbles or Measles they gunned down.

  40. Holly Folly
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:13 am [Reply]

    Okay this is bugging me. There is no way he could have half that cake on his little plate. Yet the drawing clearly shows that half is missing. Who ate the other quarter? Did the guests eat their fill already? Was one quarter of that cake filled with poison and he has to take one for the team and save his loved ones? Is he picturing death in glory? Truly the word may never know.

  41. hogenmogen
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:13 am [Reply]

    @Dartpaw86 (#2): Being Archie, of course it’s a weak joke. I’m getting thrilled, though, because the strip is degenerating into a pattern of “Veronica says something random. Mr. Lodge reiterates his Archie-hate.” Let’s try:

    Veronica: The results of the election are in!
    Mr. Lodge: And I hope Archie is voted out!

    Veronica: College basketball season is starting!
    Mr. Lodge: Archie season is starting – starting to annoy me!

    Veronica: Are we having a turkey for Thanksgiving feast?
    Mr. Lodge: I will feast on Archie’s dead corpse! Uh… I mean, Archie is a “turkey” in the slang-term usage, meaning that he seems befuddled, uncoordinated and slightly lacking in intelligence.

  42. Marco Polo Shirt
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:18 am [Reply]

    No, no, no Archie is not a rerun; it is just set in 1991. Next Jughead discovers grunge.

    It’s nostalgia!

  43. hogenmogen
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:21 am [Reply]

    “Blah blah blah, history of comic strips quoted from Wikipedia, blah blah.”

    “Dude, I’m going to do some ‘comic book’ purchasing online, where they just send you stuff and shut up.”

  44. pastordan, lazy professor
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:22 am [Reply]

    The Amazing Spider-Man: I don’t know what’s better, Kraven’s weird groping hand emerging from his pumpkin-like shell in frame one, or his look of surprise and disgust in frame two. “Baby, I told you it was just a one-time thing. Let’s not make this weird…”

    Apt. 3-G: I will admit that I did not see this coming. I thought Greg was going to be the bad guy, had no idea Evan would two-time Margo with a poodle.

    9 Chickweed Lane: Brooke McEldowney walks into a bar, and the barkeep says “Sorry, pal. The last time you were here, it took us a week to clean up the mirrors.”

    Dick Tracy: Or you could just huff the fumes from your burning raccoon-fur coat…

    Judge Parker: Either Bubba’s a violent, jealous psycho, or he’s dumb as a board. There’s no way that trout will tolerate his image being treated so shoddily.

    Mark Trail: “Oh daughter, don’t cry. It’s not like Mark’s hanging out with bikini babes.” “But his editor said there were pelicans all over the place!” … “You knew he was a kinky bastard when you married him.”

    Mary Worth: Somehow the juxtaposition of Dawn declaring her desire to explore everything over the photo of her and Wilbur indicates to me that I’ve been hanging around here for too long. Also, what the hell is going in frame two? Wilbur looks like he’s going to cop a feel, and Dawn looks like a freaked-out alien.

    Rex Morgan: Many mornings bring us an accidental theme in the funny pages, usually involving golf, parenting, or hookers-and-blow. Today’s theme? “Intros to the World’s Worst Porn.”

    Sinfest: I know the feeling.

  45. pastordan, lazy professor
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:23 am [Reply]

    @Marco Polo Shirt (#42): I can’t wait until Jughead gets hooked on heroin. Or did that really happen in the alt-series?

  46. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:23 am [Reply]

    AD: nope, no subtext there.

    Luann: yes, yes he would.

    Bizarro: memetic. still a facepalm.

    Zits: they’re on recycled paper, doofus.

    Crank: DIE IN A FIRE!!! (or in Dick Tracy, either way is fine.)

    Lockhorns: guest-starring June Morgan. (yegodz, what a jut.)

  47. The Ghost of Jarrod
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:23 am [Reply]

    JP – Avery will use his great negotiation skills to win over Bea. Which, as far as I can tell, means he’s going to offer her sixteen million dollars in cash — but that’s just his opening offer, he could go higher.

    Luann – Color me unsurprised that Evans is arguing for a return to chivalry, which was less about opening doors for women and more about ensuring that they could be controlled and directed.

    S4th – Ces, you magnificent bastard. Anyone could make a Star Wars reference. But “Star Blazers?” Awesome.

  48. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:24 am [Reply]

    Love Is. . . fishy.

  49. Anonymous
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:26 am [Reply]

    Measles’ possession of many pain killers is a direct result of Obaamacare, but too late to use in the election.

  50. Greg
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:29 am [Reply]

    No wonder Archie prefers Veronica over Betty. Veronica is a squirter. (Sorry.)

  51. hogenmogen
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:35 am [Reply]

    @Liam (#22): A3G: “Tug boat captain” gave me a laugh. For a moment, I pictured Margo in pirate attire, sailing up and down the East River, raiding unsuspecting luxury fishing yachts and stealing their treasures. Every so often, she hits one and the owner says “You look familiar. You were supposed to decorate my condo, but then you said that you’d plan my daughter’s sweet 16 party, but then you dropped the whole thing and offered to be my PR manager.”

    Margo, of course, would never be a tug boat captain. She goes for glamorous service careers for the jet-set that require contacts, interpersonal skills and no capital investment. For her next career move, you can’t rule out high-class prostitution.

  52. Doctor Handsome
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:38 am [Reply]

    I want to be mad at Mr. Lodge for hatin’ on my boy Archie, but damn, his derriere is lookin’ CHOICE in those slacks.

  53. bunivasal
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:39 am [Reply]

    So… that little kid who appears in the second Six Differences… who else wants to guess that he’s going for that knife?

  54. ScienceGiant
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:40 am [Reply]

    Your other hint this Archie strip was written in 1991: kids are still reading newspapers, and shelves are full of books.

  55. Nehemiah Scudder
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:44 am [Reply]

    NonSeq: A quibble, perhaps, but shouldn’t the humans be in Ark I, and the dinosaurs and unicorns and such be in Ark II?

  56. Doctor Handsome
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:48 am [Reply]

    I honestly miss the days when I could make fun of Dick Tracy in earnest. Nowadays all I can say is, “Dick Tracy is fucking awesome,” which is true but not funny.

  57. Here come the Judge
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:50 am [Reply]

    One of the six differences is that the guy in the grey suit (presumably the father of the bride) visited the restroom and trimmed his massive amount of nose hair before they shot panel two.

  58. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:55 am [Reply]

    corgi info.

    Rex, from the FUTURE!!!

    Poteet’s new ride.

    the power of Labrador eyes is over 9000.

    distinguished Cardi. ‘you rang, sir?’

    cardi & merle corgsqui, flopped.

  59. Hibbleton
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:55 am [Reply]

    @Josh (#36):
    In your settings, I believe you should have a menu for Coordinated Universal Time, UTC, which should be set for UTC-5.

  60. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:59 am [Reply]

    Pigpron: sadly, Pib got a costume change. I’m sure Brooke has a few “test” drawings of her in the other djinn’s outfit, and yesterday’s pose.

    while I’m on highly random thoughts, I had a very strange dreamlette a few mornings ago. I was in a room, and to the right were cockroaches running in all directions. To the left, the roaches were all running in a line, being herded by an inch-long corgi.

  61. Artist formerly known as Ben
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:01 am [Reply]

    Archie: Hiram Lodge thinks about Archie way more than his daughter does. Methinks he has dreams about young Mr. Andrews that excite him in ways he can’t deal with.

    DT: Now’s as good a time as any for a drug safety PSA, I suppose.

    MW: Hey Wilbur, it’s nice that you’re cool with your daughter being bi-curious and all, but could you kindly not feel her up right now?

    Crock: Black Eyed Peas’ “My Humps” in its first draft form.

    9CL: “Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. That was ‘Self Ego Stroking in D Minor’ by B. McEldowney.”

    JP: “What a grotesque specimen,” thinks the tropical fish.

    Garfield: His weirdo sexual fetishes got explained away as inquisitiveness, so Uncle Otto must have been rich.

    GA: What? No definitive answer on whether the friendly hitchhiker was a ghost? Go back and rehash that mess another dozen times.

    HtH: Anachronism-filled strip does telemarketer joke, strangely enough does not include any telephones.

    Luann: Wasn’t a cape part of the attempted goth makeover?

    S-M: Spidey and Kraven may be evenly matched after all. Both are flabbergasted by the idea of a showgirl who can speak.

    OBH: The family’s Catholic, but Joe just had his “Today I am a man” moment.

    A3G: Windwood? I hear they’re so fancy they actually have someone in the office who learns the clients’ names.

  62. Illustrator Steve
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:01 am [Reply]

    MT – “I can’t believe this is happening! Do you think we will ever see Mark again, Dad?”
    “NO, he’s probably outside!”

  63. Doctor Handsome
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:12 am [Reply]

    The guy just walks up and takes half the cake right as the bride and groom were about to cut it, but nobody says a word. Heck, they look more bemused than angry. Crashing Canadian weddings isn’t even a challenge.

  64. Esther Blodgett
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:15 am [Reply]

    @Doctor Handsome (#52): Damn you for making me look.

  65. Mibbitmaker
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:17 am [Reply]

    @Josh (#36): Even though I tried, I couldn’t get the time on my comics to Daylight Savings Time, so only this week is the time on each comic’s page actually correct. Comic Fury’s exceptionally easy to use for a non-techy like myself, but that’s one thing I haven’t been able to do.

  66. Nehemiah Scudder
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:20 am [Reply]

    @Doctor Handsome (#63): I like the look of admiration the little girl is giving the the cake-taker. “My hero!,” she seems to be thinking. “Someday, when I’m big and strong, I’ll take the cake! All of it!”?

  67. Liam
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:21 am [Reply]

    JP-Wouldn’t of been easier to just destroy the memory card instead of the entire camera? Mark Trail knew to get rid of Kelly’s memory card and his stuff dates from the Fifties.

    MW-Sorry, Dawn, but there shall be no experimenting for you. Mary has already paired a man up for you. He is a balding middle aged man with a love of sandwiches. He is always there when you are around you just really haven’t noticed him yet. He’s your father.

  68. Esther Blodgett
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:22 am [Reply]

    FW: Words fail me. I wish they would fail Batuik for once.

    AS: I have to Argyle Sweater credit when it makes me laugh out loud. Well done.

    JP: Way to go, Bubba. Without that fish picture, the whole deal’s off.

  69. Illustrator Steve
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:26 am [Reply]

    MT – “I can’t believe this is happening! I could have easily raised the two million dollars for Mark’s ransom if I hadn’t allowed Rusty to trade his collection of pre neanderthal arrowheads for that ugly darn old eighty pound solid gold rock I keep tripping over!”
    (Pop): “NO, he’s propbably outside!”

  70. Liam
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:28 am [Reply]

    Dick Tracy-”Three days? But I want this pain patch to last three hours.”

    RMMD-Wow. This is going viral.

  71. Mibbitmaker
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:30 am [Reply]

    DT: Really dark strip there, like Gould in his prime. Good job, boys!

    Archie, meta: 1991, eh? Makes me think less of Pauly Shore (and, as if I need to tell anyone, thinking least about Pauly Shore is the only way to think about Pauly Shore!), and more about when I first discovered MST3K. A couple weeks before that year’s “Turkey Day Marathon”, in fact. [*]

    SFx: Huh, huh, huh, huh… Fat guy eat… Huh, huh, huh, huh…….

  72. Austria
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:41 am [Reply]

    Blondie: Clearly Elmo hasn’t ever been forced to eat cafeteria Thanksgiving food multiple times in the weeks leading up to the holidays.

    Curtis: I like the chewed-up box in the last panel and Barry looking for the escaped rodent or whatever. It’s a nice touch.

    MW: What a nice sentiment from HOLY GUACAMOLE SHE’S A TEENAGER?!?

  73. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:41 am [Reply]

    JP: Tomorrow: Avery transforms into a pudgy ball of squinty-eyed rage! “My camera?! Avery angry! Avery smash!” Hilarity ensues as he futilely tries to put a plump little fist through that fish tank as Bubba looks on bemusedly.

  74. Liam
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:41 am [Reply]

    Crankshaft-Geez, Cranky, with the way you are going about running that’s girl horn we would think that you actually ran over the girl instead and is rather proud of it too.

  75. Calico
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:50 am [Reply]

    Nothing like chewing a little Fentanyl in the morning!

  76. pugfuggly
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:56 am [Reply]

    SFx Never mind the differences between the two panels, I’m more interested in the two virtually identical couples that appear in both of them. Is this a case or twins marrying twins, or is it that Mr Blue Suit’s act of gluttony is so rude that it ripped the fabric of space and time to allow two versions of this man and wife from parallel universes to attend the same wedding?

    Archie This week, on A&E’s Hoarders: the tragic story of a bizarre millionaire who’s been collecting newspapers since the early 90s, and his deranged daughter who can’t seem to distinguish the past from the present.

    DT This is why Beyers stopped selling heroin in patch form.

  77. Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD
    November 8th, 2012 at 12:02 pm [Reply]

    DT: Poor Measles. What he doesn’t know is that those pain patches are knock-off Chinese imports and each one contains a vicious mix of camphor, menthnol, nicotine, and botulinum.

  78. Liam
    November 8th, 2012 at 12:04 pm [Reply]

    FW-”I have yet to reach my point. You shall stay here and listen to the entire history of comics.”

    MW-”You’re a teenager, Dawn. Did you know that? Did you know you’re a teenager even though you look like and have the fashion sense of a middle aged woman.”

  79. TheDiva
    November 8th, 2012 at 12:09 pm [Reply]

    Jumping in quickly between bouts of unpacking; snarpologies:

    C’shaft: Well, that weak pun completely justifies Crankshaft destroying a valuable instrument that will cost several thousand dollars to replace!

    FW: I tell you, The Kids These Days don’t appreciate the history of the noble art of the comic strip, which need not be a vessel for something so pedestrian as humor but which is a serious art form for serious issues which deserve serious awards!

    Luann: Sorry, no male character in this strip is cool enough to be sporting a cape. Unless it involves a tragic fashion accident, a la Isadora Duncan or The Incredibles.

    MW: In other news, Wilbur approves of Dawn’s “experimenting” phase. Make of that what you will.

    Pibgorn: I suppose we should be thankful she didn’t opt for the loincloth.

    Pluggers even fail at nostalgia.

  80. Spiff Bereft
    November 8th, 2012 at 12:28 pm [Reply]

    DT: Since Measles already drastically misunderstood “lasts three days” on the label, what happens when he reads they’re ANALgesics?

  81. Mibbitmaker
    November 8th, 2012 at 12:30 pm [Reply]

    BBlues: “Honey, you’ve got to stop hanging around with Danae Pyle! She’s a corrupting influence!”

    …Sorry, that should read: “THOSE TWO AREN’T AMAZING!!!!!”

    Curtis: (Admittedly annoying as hell)”Vernacular! How DARE you?!!”

    JP: This is the point where Avery turns into Louie DePalma. God help the huge purple guy!

    MW: Jim’s a controlling quasi-incest case — and “I want to explore everything” is her reason for maybe not seeing him?! I’d really rethink that “pretty smart” thing, Wilbur! …That, and the idea of ripping off her arm. Rethink that, too! Didn’t exactly do much for Jim, did it?

  82. Bootsy
    November 8th, 2012 at 12:34 pm [Reply]

    I’ll go back and read the above comments, so if this has been addressed, oversnarpologies.

    In the first panel of Spider-Man, is Kraven wearing a pumpkin shell?v It sure looks like it.

  83. Liam
    November 8th, 2012 at 12:40 pm [Reply]

    @Spiff Bereft (#80):

    Sadly we won’t be able to see that part.

  84. Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD
    November 8th, 2012 at 1:08 pm [Reply]

    AS-M Redux: Tune in tomorrow, True Believers, when Avery Blackstone steps from behind the potted palms to offer Kraven and Spider-Man a one-hour prime-time TV variety show. He’ll hook’em up with Magee & Magoo (slogan: “Now you see’em, now you — meh.”) and no one will ever hear from them again.

    From that point on, Newspaper Spider-Man will become a naturalistic, slice-of-life strip detailing day-to-day life of a spider-eating homeless man wandering the Five Boroughs.

  85. 555 95472
    November 8th, 2012 at 1:21 pm [Reply]

    @hogenmogen (#41): Impressive, Hogenmogen! Just think….with this writing sample, the only other thing you’d need to get a job writing Archie comics is a time-travel machine, so you could go back to 1991 when they were actually writing them!

  86. 555 95472
    November 8th, 2012 at 1:24 pm [Reply]

    @Esther Blodgett (#68): But Batiuk fails with words on a daily basis!

    Oh, wait. I see what you were getting at. Yes, that would be nice….

  87. pastordan, is not aware of all internet conventions
    November 8th, 2012 at 1:30 pm [Reply]

    @Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD (#77): Don’t forget the dried-up babies coming over from North Korea…

  88. Poteet
    November 8th, 2012 at 1:34 pm [Reply]

  89. Poteet
    November 8th, 2012 at 1:38 pm [Reply]

    9CL — Isn’t it a little hazardous to hurl your program toward the stage and hope it won’t hit another audience member? And thanks, Mudges, for pointing out that the hurled items are programs. For a few wild moments I thought the audience was supposed to have extracted their own souls and flung them toward the stage because Amos and Edda are Just That Good.

  90. Poteet
    November 8th, 2012 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

    S-M — That really is supposed to be a mane on Kraven, right? Has it actually grown out of his shoulders via some weird operation, or does Kraven (odd name for someone who obviously wants to ooze courage and testosterone) take it off and hang it over a chair at night and put it on every morning, like a wig? Does it have to be dry-cleaned occasionally? I’m surprised the actual lion wasn’t doubled over laughing. As for how Kraven probably smells if you get too close, ewww.

  91. damanoid
    November 8th, 2012 at 1:56 pm [Reply]

    Let’s review: a freakishly disfigured criminal, simultaneously bleeding out from an ax-wound and horribly burned about the face and shoulders, tosses his still-flaming jacket to the ground and desperately shovels pain patches into his mouth as he prepares for a last-ditch shootout with the law. It’s like one last, gloriously sordid ember of the Golden Age of Newspaper Comics flaring up, up, before the print medium gutters out forever.

  92. hogenmogen
    November 8th, 2012 at 1:56 pm [Reply]

    Luann: A girl who makes a big stink out of a guy opening a door for her now wants this guy to throw a cape over a puddle for her?

    By the way, three hundred years ago, maybe one guy dropped a cape in a puddle by accident and a woman walked over it. The girl was hot, so the guy said “Yes, Ma’m, I draped my cape over the puddle so you would not become tarnished.” That, versus “You ruined my cape, bey-otch!” Anyway, it has been chivalry legend ever since, but never actually repeated.

    And Gunther would definitely do the cape thing, even when not asked.

  93. Snarkotix Addict
    November 8th, 2012 at 1:56 pm [Reply]

    MW – “You’re pretty smart for a teenager, Dawn.”
    “Dad! I’m thirty years old!”
    “Oops. Sorry, I let that slip.”

  94. hogenmogen
    November 8th, 2012 at 1:57 pm [Reply]

    I mean Gunther would WEAR a cape. And spandex underwear.

  95. Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:04 pm [Reply]

    @pastordan, is not aware of all internet conventions (#87): No, I think Dried Baby is a different, Locher-era villain.

  96. hogenmogen
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:04 pm [Reply]

    HtH: “Where else WOULD we be at dinnertime?”

    A restaurant
    A friend’s house
    Hunting, gathering
    A dungeon with now trite anachronisms
    Sacking castles in England with other trite anachronisms.
    A cliched small island with one palm tree, bantering trite anachronisms.

  97. hogenmogen
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:10 pm [Reply]

    Arch: Maybe all of Riverdale is a bio-dome, cut off from the outside world for twenty long years now.

    There was a movie called Dark City, where the inhabitants ultimately find out that the city is really a zoo on a space ship.

  98. Shrug, Speaker to Elrod
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:14 pm [Reply]

    @Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD (#y105):

    “I think I saw that movie! What was it called? Dial M for Mark? To Punch a Thief?”


  99. Austria
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

    @Mibbitmaker (#81): re Curtis – Actually, he was showing off his boxers. Take a look at the second panel again. (No worries, took me a while to figure out, too.)

  100. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:16 pm [Reply]

    Slylock MFing Fox–

    Maybe someone has already mentioned that cake taker is the brides ex-husband. For him, it is a happy, happy day.

    As for the twins mentioned by @pugfuggly (#76):.

    What is up with their hair? Are they inspired by that character on the Fat Albert Show, Dumb Donald, who wore a stocking cap over his eyes?

  101. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:19 pm [Reply]

    I hereby decree that Dick Tracy has transcended the comics page in ways that will make Batuik want to make a story line about comic strips, forget about Life’s tragedies, and embrace great comic arts!

    And, no on shall know that this change occurred as no one will bother reading Batwicky’s meanderings.

    So be it!

  102. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:21 pm [Reply]

    snuffy smif

    it took forever to figure out what was going on there. Once figured out, it still doesn’t make much sense. What benefit is there to those giagantic knitting needles unless there is going to be a drunken jousting contest–which will. not. end. well. at. all.

  103. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:23 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#88): Never-Ending Story Racing Snail + “they see me rollin’” meme.

  104. Calico
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:23 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#17):
    Let me guess…tomorrow Bubba will say “but because you love that trout so much, and he’s part of our family too, I downloaded the Old Hardy pics first and had prints lovingly framed for you, in mahogany and cherrywood.”
    (Big “Awwwww”, then canned laughter, Avery and Bubba hug, and Brady Bunch *da da da da da boont* episode end music plays)

  105. Calico
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:26 pm [Reply]

    @Alice (#13):
    I hope Mr. Lodge can afford a good doctor to help with Veronica’s extreme hyperhydrosis.

  106. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:30 pm [Reply]

    So, after a long confabulation with Slylock Fox, it has been determined that the proof is overwhelming against the credibility of Jim’s Story in the comic strip, Old Boring Biddy, Mary Worth.

    If you look closely, in panel one of today’s strip there is a photograph of Wilbo Snackins and his daughter Awwwwwn. Does that look familiar? Of course it does. Any astute follower of the delightfully eccentric adventures of OBB Mary will recognize that is a variation of the exact same photograph that Jim showed Awwwwwn as he continued his freaked out stalking lunches with her.

    It is safe to assume that Jim Photoshopped himself to replace Wilbo Snacking–who thankfully is back from his quest for the Ring Dings and is spending time eating Albino-ized Delicacies his daughter is making from her new favorite cookbook, Tofu for Me and You–Getting Used to Bland, Daily, Repeatedly.

    Awwwwn is somehow unaware that the evidence is sitting right behind her. Tis rare a saucy redhead, like her, misses something that obvious.

  107. Calico
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:33 pm [Reply]

    @Greg (#50):
    Haha, like Dana in The L Word. : P

  108. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:34 pm [Reply]

    mark trail

    I think it is safe to say that today’s strip was done to help Elrod remind himself what is going on in the story.

    It helped me, too.
    I was like, “Oh yeah! They went fishing….!”

  109. Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:34 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug, Speaker to Elrod (#98):

  110. Chaze
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:42 pm [Reply]

    MT – When I read today’s strip, I hear Dr Evil’s voice come from Cherry when she says TWO MILLION DOLLARS. Of course, then I turn into Tim Robbins and go “bwaahahaha.”

  111. TheDiva
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:45 pm [Reply]

    @hogenmogen (#92): One of the reasons Judi Dench as Elizabeth I is the best (and arguably only) reason to see Shakespeare in Love is the scene where she finds a puddle in front of her carriage door. While her retainers fall over themselves trying to remove their cloaks and cast them at her feet, she just rolls her eyes, hikes up her skirt and tromps through the mud.

  112. Chaze
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:49 pm [Reply]

    MW – Based on the picture of Dawn and Wilbur in panel one, she’s had that lame hairdo since she was ten. Pretty creepy. But because Wilbur also has a picture of the flowers in the vase in panel two up on the wall, I’m suspecting that change might not be welcome in Wilbur’s life, or apartment.

  113. Calico
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:51 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#100):
    Fat Abbot:
    (As I recall, Cosby was really pissed off about this)

  114. Chaze
    November 8th, 2012 at 2:53 pm [Reply]

    Mr Lodge, Dennis the Menace’s grampa and I all are wearing brown slacks and a black sweater today. I don’t usually do that. Should I be alarmed?

  115. Chaze
    November 8th, 2012 at 3:03 pm [Reply]

    JP – Avery is a ginger whose nickname just might have been Rusty. He has a fixation on a camera and craves fishing over everything else in his life, as if he had been deprived of the pleasure when he was a kid. He rushes headlong into dangerous situations without giving it much thought and wants a big man’s partnership. See where I’m going here?

  116. Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD
    November 8th, 2012 at 3:15 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#115): Avery is Ted Forth all grown up?

  117. teenchy
    November 8th, 2012 at 3:23 pm [Reply]

    @Mary Worthless (#35): F’reals. I thought Dawn was at least in her early twenties if not older.

  118. Shrug, Howdier to Hormones
    November 8th, 2012 at 3:24 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#4):

    Edda “may have been fired from her day job, but she always has a pianist to fall back on.”

    I don’t think she’s quite agile enough to “fall back” on such without the risk of missing and spraining something; usually she just faces forward, quickly climbs on and . . .

    /// Oh, wait. PIANIST. That’s different. That’s very different.

    /// Never mind.

  119. Shrug, Flaunter to Fluids
    November 8th, 2012 at 3:27 pm [Reply]

    @Alice (#13):

    “Also, what is it with Archie characters and their projectile sweat drops that travel so far away from the body that you can see them even when the character is off-panel? ”

    Veronica has become strangely excited at the thought of the two main men in her life, fun-loving swain Archie and stern daddy-figure Mr. Lodge, struggling manfully over little old her.

    /// In other words, those projectile drops aren’t just sweat.

  120. Inkwell
    November 8th, 2012 at 3:28 pm [Reply]

    Y’know, when I was younger, Mr. Lodge was always one of my favorite Archie characters. Now I’m not sure why.

  121. Mr Foofram
    November 8th, 2012 at 3:28 pm [Reply]

    9CL: Amos is undoubtedly playing (and singing) ‘Is You Is, or Is You Ain’t My Baby,’ in the style of Tom Cat in the classic 1946 Tom and Jerry cartoon ‘Solid Serenade.’ No wonder everyone is swooning.

  122. Illustrator Steve
    November 8th, 2012 at 3:33 pm [Reply]

    MT – “Poor Mark, I’m so worried! Dad, please explain tome again WHY we never call the police when things like this happen?”
    “No, he’s probably outside!”
    “Yes, Dad, I unerstad. But what if we at least call ranger Tom Martin? Ranger Tom may know WHAT to do, don’tchathink, Dad?”
    “No, he’s probably outside!”
    “Oh my, I wonder if Andy was kidnapped too!”
    “No,he’s probably outside!”

  123. Alfred E. Neuman
    November 8th, 2012 at 3:38 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#89) said Re: 9CL— “And thanks, Mudges, for pointing out that the hurled items are programs.”

    What? You mean those weren’t items of clothing tossed by the audience in a mass involuntary orgiastic frenzy? Brooke is really off his game today.

  124. Marthas Rolling Pin
    November 8th, 2012 at 3:40 pm [Reply]

    @hogenmogen (#92): Ah, good sir, ’twas far more than a mere three hundred years ago. Legend (sadly unsupported by fact) has it that sometime in the late sixteenth century, Sir Walter Raleigh tossed his velvet cloak over a puddle to keep the dainty feet of Good Queen Bess dry, as part of his campaign to win her favor and patronage for his scheme to colonize the New World. Which is why, in his namesake city of Raleigh, in the state spiritually descended from his ill-fated colony, there stands a once-grand hotel still known as The Velvet Cloak Inn.

  125. Marthas Rolling Pin
    November 8th, 2012 at 3:48 pm [Reply]

    Election-season lagniappe: Back in the last century, the Velvet Cloak was where the North Carolina Republicans gathered for their election-night watch and party, while the Dems held theirs in the even older and grander Sir Walter Raleigh ballroom downtown.

  126. Shrug, Grumbler About Garments
    November 8th, 2012 at 3:52 pm [Reply]

    @Marthas Rolling Pin (#124):

    We can only be thankful that Sir Walter had a cloak handy and did not need to make a desperate substitution for the lack of one. I can’t see a high-class hotel in Raleigh naming itself The Leather Truss Inn.

  127. 555 95472
    November 8th, 2012 at 4:05 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#114): That you’re paying any attention whatsoever to Dennis The Menace? Yes, you should be extremely worried.

  128. Dan
    November 8th, 2012 at 4:06 pm [Reply]

    The knife, placed prominently at the groom’s waist, shrinks in the second vignette. On his wedding day he has been dominated in front of his new bride, and Six Differences has entered strange Freudian territory.

  129. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 4:08 pm [Reply]

    @Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD (#109):

    Mr. Punch, Punch, Slug, Slug–

    //(“kiss, kiss, bam, bam”) –it might just be a variation of a song title that was or wasn’t used in a movie. dunno. twisting it around makes me chuckle though.
    Damn. Now I want to make a character with that name. I’m half-way there (annnnnnd, completely out to lunch!)

  130. ArchieNemesis
    November 8th, 2012 at 4:11 pm [Reply]

    Biosphere 2 gave us important data about the positive health and longevity effects of a low-calorie, high nutrient diet. Mr. Lodge would actually be prolonging his life, and therefore his Archie-related misery, by joining the Biosphere crew.

  131. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 4:14 pm [Reply]

    @Calico (#113):

    Yeah. The Cos is a cranky one these days. I swear he lost his sense of humor–as others practice it–years ago. Pre Jay Leno.*

    There was a series of web cartoons called “The House of Cosbys” that freaked him out and he got all lawyerly with the guy who made them. Imagine a bunch of Cosby Show characters who were all in fact clones of Bill Cosby. It was just weird.

    Cos wan’t happy.

    *and like Funky Winkerbean’s creator, maybe there is a specific event in his life which is an extenuating circumstance which precipitated his diminished capacity to appreciate all things which can be humorous. Dunno. In a way, I don’t doubt it. But, he lost a son some years ago. And, that is possibly the reason why he can be funny himself but has such a low tolerance for some things. And, he’s old and rich.

    You know: whatever.

  132. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 4:15 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#131):

    Cos wan’t happy.

    I’m sure that was a typo that doesn’t also qualify as Webslang.

    Cos wasn’t happy.

  133. Liam
    November 8th, 2012 at 4:20 pm [Reply]

    Archie-The Biosphere wasn’t that the thing where only one person left or am I thinking of Thunderdome.

  134. Calico
    November 8th, 2012 at 4:20 pm [Reply]

    I know, his son was killed on the side of an LA highway by a couple of robbers/thugs. Very sad.

  135. Baka Gaijin
    November 8th, 2012 at 4:30 pm [Reply]

    Snatching half the wedding cake is a Plugger move, amirite?

  136. Poteet
    November 8th, 2012 at 4:38 pm [Reply]

    SLYLOCK — So that’s why I get invited to so few weddings. Huh.

  137. Chaze
    November 8th, 2012 at 4:40 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#132):

    Not so fast, my friend. “Wan’t” was exactly the way my family from Rutland, VT pronounced “wasn’t.”

    Or, it was a typo.

  138. Liam
    November 8th, 2012 at 4:51 pm [Reply]

    RMMD-”Wow. This video has gotten more hits than the one of Queen Bee dressed like Mona Lisa with a frame around her neck.”

    Pluggers-”Why back in the day we would keep the sexes separate.”

  139. This Guy
    November 8th, 2012 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

    9CL: I’m reminded of a bit by Russell Brand in which he posited the outcome of his audience breaking out in a mass orgy during a show. “We surfed out of that theater on a river of sperm…”

  140. Poteet
    November 8th, 2012 at 5:05 pm [Reply]

    DT — So umpteen cop cars are closed in around a tree watching a guy named Measles munch on pain patches. It’s maybe even more interesting to drop in on DT occasionally than follow it, methinks.

  141. Poteet
    November 8th, 2012 at 5:09 pm [Reply]

    @This Guy (#139): Brain bleach! Stat!

  142. Horace Broon
    November 8th, 2012 at 5:14 pm [Reply]

    HtH: In the 10th century, cowboy builders didn’t even knock on the door, they just stuck their heads through the window and introduced themselves. True history fact!

    FW: I can’t decide if Tom is attempting knowing self-awareness (and falling short), or if we’re supposed to be horrified by this kid’s lack of interest in such a fascinating lecture.

    JP: Oh, right, that.

    MT: No, Cherry, you’ve got the TWO MILLION DOLLARS! right, but try it with your pinky held to your mouth, not your whole hand.

    Phantom: I assume there’s a further twist coming, because I can’t quite believe that Phantom is doing a story where the outsiders who are after the mining rights are in the right, and the village elders are pulling the Scooby-Doo Hoax.

  143. Horace Broon
    November 8th, 2012 at 5:15 pm [Reply]

    Should’ve hit preview…

  144. Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD
    November 8th, 2012 at 5:15 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#141): Rivers of Sperm is McEldowney’s new band’s name.

  145. Artist formerly known as Ben
    November 8th, 2012 at 5:17 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#4):

    She may have been fired from her day job, but she always has a pianist to fall back on.

    Thanks to Amos, yes. She’d just better be careful not to sprain it.

  146. Artist formerly known as Ben
    November 8th, 2012 at 5:23 pm [Reply]

    @gleeb (#38):

    Two new characters: the guys who are constantly hanging around the Komix Shoppe playing videogames.

    The bespectacled one has shown up before and probably has a name, although I’m not looking it up. He’s a friend of Owen’s, looks like a young Les, and had an aching crush on Summer. Yeah.

  147. Calico
    November 8th, 2012 at 5:28 pm [Reply]

    @Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD (#109):
    Gone with the Dog (again)

  148. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    November 8th, 2012 at 5:38 pm [Reply]

  149. CanuckDownSouth
    November 8th, 2012 at 5:58 pm [Reply]

    @Horace Broon (#142): re Phantom: But Guran’s tribal elders *always* pull the Scooby hoax when they help the Phantom succession! Why should they have all the fun? But yeah there has to be more – the odd hunting range has to mean something (invisible fence with subcutaneous shock device? what’s the point?).

  150. The Central Scrutinizer
    November 8th, 2012 at 5:59 pm [Reply]

    If in the first picture there is a giant, menacing knife, then in the second picture somebody better be getting stabbed. If it’s not going to stab someone, it shouldn’t be there. It CERTAINLY shouldn’t just get smaller.

  151. seismic-2
    November 8th, 2012 at 6:03 pm [Reply]

    SFx: The way I interpret the scene, the middle-aged guy with the buzz haircut is trying to do the newlyweds a favor. First, he has arranged things so that the only other people present at the cutting of the cake are two over-50 couples consisting of bald, worn-down husbands who are forced to attend weddings in taupe polyester suits because that’s all they’ve got, and their frumpy, overweight wives with their horribly colored hair piled high not so much in a beehive as in a wasps’ nest. How’s that for a glimpse of what you have waiting for you a few decades down the road, huh, happy couple? Next, he has sliced the wedding cake right down the middle and walked off with half of it, to show the newlyweds what to expect in a community property settlement should they divorce. Are you sufficiently horrified, bride and groom? If so, it’s still not too late – you can have the marriage annulled right now, before it’s legally consummated! Fortunately, the young couple has apparently taken the lesson to heart, since in the second panel they have already started to hide any evidence of their relationship by disposing of the first of their two bastard children.

    DT: Let’s see- Measels has been shot in the arm, had his collarbone shattered with an ax, had a shovelful of hot ashes tossed on his head and has his clothes set on fire, but he so tough that he still manages to escape successfully even without taking any pain killers? If so, then once he chews and swallows that whole box full of “pain patches”, he will become as invulnerable and unstoppable as Superman on Ecstasy. The cops will subject him to a barrage of bullets greater than that of the entire Battle of Iwo Jima, yet he will keep on coming even as they escalate their attack to include shotguns, machine guns, RPGs, bazookas, howitzers, and tactical nuclear weapons. This assault on his person will make the assassination of Rasputin look like a pleasant evening spent with friends, yet he will keep coming back for more. And this will all be played out on the same comics page as Spiderman??? Sam Peckinpah wept.

  152. CanuckDownSouth
    November 8th, 2012 at 6:04 pm [Reply]

    @The Central Scrutinizer (#150): Never mind chainsaws! Was there some special “Anti-Chekhov Cartoonist’s Principles” seminar recently?

  153. Marc
    November 8th, 2012 at 6:06 pm [Reply]

    Mark Trail is interesting in taking a pleasure bonefishing trip on the river of sperm.

  154. This Guy
    November 8th, 2012 at 6:29 pm [Reply]

    @Liam (#133): Oh, come on, Liam, can’t we just get beyond Thunderdome?

  155. Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD
    November 8th, 2012 at 6:48 pm [Reply]

    @Calico (#147): @This Guy (#154): Oh, calm down. We don’t need another hero.

  156. Alfred E. Neuman
    November 8th, 2012 at 6:51 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#4) said: “9CL – For those of you who may have forgotten, Edda is not only a (former) feature ballerina, but also a world class classical musician! So, don’t worry about her! She may have been fired from her day job, but she always has a pianist to fall back on.”

    Edda’s less endowed fellow ballerinas must certainly suffer from pianist envy.

  157. Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD
    November 8th, 2012 at 7:06 pm [Reply]

    @Inspector Butterflyfish, LFHD (#155): Uh, yeah, that wasn’t meant as a reply to Calico (#147).

  158. Calico
    November 8th, 2012 at 8:58 pm [Reply]

  159. H-Bob
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:04 pm [Reply]

    Why does Mr. Lodge infuriate Josh so much ? Josh’s comment about Mr. Lodge’s egomania in reading his own autobiography is one of the funniest I ever read !

  160. Artist formerly known as Ben
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:06 pm [Reply]

    @The Central Scrutinizer (#150): The shrinking knife is a portent of the honeymoon night. Indeed, this marriage is off to a rocky start.

  161. MWDG
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:29 pm [Reply]


    Sorry to repeat this but, For GOD SAKE someone call the Santa Royale Police! … I believe Adrian’s husband, Scott is on the force…. Drew Corey Fu@K$d Dawn at least three years ago! Drew was about 30! Dawn would have been 15 at the time… which makes this act statuatory rape in state of California. Drew was “doing” Vera at the same time as Dawn.

    It is just as about as likely that Dawn Weston is a teenager as Diane Sawyer being sober on election night. Why would any teen hang out with a senile hag like Mary who at least fifty percent of the time has a large dried out stool in her Depends.

    Jim is even weirder than the typical character in this strip. When is he going to get an artifical arm? I hope his fake arm allows him to strangle Dawn and Wilbur so that he and Mary can have a cannibal feast!

  162. Elk Meadow
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:38 pm [Reply]

    @Doctor Handsome (#56):

    I honestly miss the days when I could make fun of Dick Tracy in earnest. Nowadays all I can say is, “Dick Tracy is fucking awesome,” which is true but not funny.

    Who knew it could ever be so?! Can you imagine what other legacy comics would be like if such love of the characters and talent were combined for them? (Prince Valiant notable exception, as it is the only comic as awesome now as Dick Tracy.)

  163. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 9:50 pm [Reply]

    cake guy:


    “Oh. Haha! Now I feel like a well-fed fool! I guess I mis-read the invitation!
    No. No. I’m not a member of the church. What’s that?

    “So this is NOT a Mor-cake Wedding Reception?

    “Then I plead temple-ary insanity! burrrrp!”

  164. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:01 pm [Reply]

    Mary Worth:

    “The Buzz According to What I’ve Figured Out About Jim”

    He’s a freak. And, he is not a freak because of the way he is drawn, missing one arm. That is barely consequential. This entire Getting to Know Each Other thing is so awkward. They spent weeks sitting at a cafeteria table talking. Weeks. And, then finally he springs the surprise on her as to why he is fond of her…

    splllllllllttttttzzzzz. C’mon!

    It is never cool to express to someone you are fond of someone because they remind you a dead person. Fortunately for Dawn, they were not in bed together when he told her that.

    Either Jim the Teacher is legit and is awkward by nature or Jimbo Shaggins likes himself the May-September Shag-a-thons.

    Since Wilbo Snackins is too busy stuffin’ himself for Thanksgiving, it is probably up to (sigh) Mary Worth to help Dawn extricate herself from this spooky situation. Personally, I think Jim might be a stalker. But, hey. He probably isn’t.

    The way I see it, Mary probably has a stash of Shame-unitions someplace that she saves for just some occasion. More than likely there’s photos of Jimbo and some compromising photos that he hasn’t seen. Because you know that Mary has probably had that school camera’d up since Dawn was attending it.

    Pfft. Ferry. Disaster.
    More like Ferry Unlikely.

    He probably thought he was Jungle Jim and had an accident on the playground.

  165. Sequitur
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:09 pm [Reply]

    Dating Dawn would be like having Jello in your pants. At first you think, “Hey! This is fun!” But soon it becomes, “Hey! This ain’t Jello!”

  166. pastordan, lazy professor
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:40 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug, Grumbler About Garments (#126): Or Ye Olde Ivory Codpiece…

  167. pastordan, lazy professor
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:47 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#129): The phrase you’re looking for is kiss kiss bang bang. The wiki doesn’t mention the band of the same name, but they seem pretty cool too.

  168. Baka Gaijin
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:48 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#165): Someone has to say it: Ew.

  169. pastordan, lazy professor
    November 8th, 2012 at 10:49 pm [Reply]

    @pastordan, lazy professor (#167): Adding X’s “Make the Music Go Bang” is pretty awesome too.

  170. Sequitur
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:04 pm [Reply]

  171. Northernlurker
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:14 pm [Reply]

    MW: so how old was Dawn when she was dating Dr Cockblocked’s doctor son?

  172. Sequitur
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:17 pm [Reply]

    @Northernlurker (#171): Fourteen? Maybe it was a Snuffy Smith crossover.

  173. seismic-2
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:28 pm [Reply]

    @Northernlurker (#171): Dawn may chronologically be still a teenager on earth, but she’s about 42 years old biologically on the time scale of the Westons’ home planet, which explains so much.

  174. Sequitur
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:31 pm [Reply]

    Wait, wait, don’t tell me! It’s Ripley’s!

    The total known population of Mountain Gorillas is less than a thousand!

    I begged the gorillas not to move to Westview.

  175. Tilaney
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:32 pm [Reply]

    The wedding couple and their guests are stunned to silence not because he took half the cake but because he licked the knife clean.

    And having suffered through enough long wedding receptions waiting for them to cut the cake I, like the children, applaud cake guy as a hero

  176. Stroker Ace
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:52 pm [Reply]

    Slylock – Bride is pregnant in second panel.

  177. Comcis Fan
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:03 pm [Reply]

    @Liam (#78): No, she has the fashion sense of a middle-aged woman from previous eras when middle-aged women were expected to be frumpy.

  178. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:27 pm [Reply]

    @pastordan, lazy professor (#167):

    Right. Right.

    I was trying (badly) to reference the James Bond song. But, yes. of course it is “bang bang”. Silly me.

    X, huh? I am sure I’ve heard that song (I’ve seen them perform) Not sure I know it though. I’ll try to remember it…electronically.


  179. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:29 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#178):

    I was trying (badly) to link to the James Bond song.

    Me. Silly.

  180. Sgt. Stoned
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:40 pm [Reply]

    Bill: “Mark’s been kidnapped!”
    Cherry: (Yawn). “Again?”

    MW: Dawn wants to experience everything and, presumably, everybody. At least everybody male. Calling Nora Levernson!

  181. greghousesgf
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:41 pm [Reply]

    @Bill Peschel (#3): I think he already did, that would explain those hash marks on Archie’s head.

  182. tallyHO
    November 8th, 2012 at 11:54 pm [Reply]

    @greghousesgf (#181):

    Okay. This goes two ways.

    First, I agree with ya. That’s a funny point.

    Second, in re-reading what was written earlier, I think that was the point Bill made about Archie’s head.

    It is a win-win all the way around…although….

    It raises doubts that I understood all the of the comments from earlier today.

    Okay. Gadzooks!
    @Dartpaw86 (#5):

    See I thought that said “he can probably play [a song called] “The Grim Reaper”” to kill Archie.

    I gasped when I read this:
    @Josh (#36):
    “@Anonymous (#12): IF ONLY I KNEW HOW”

    I didn’t bother to read the original thing Anonymous wrote (I mean seriously, why should I?!? I come from a long and proud line of HOs and we put our name on what we write. haaaaaaaarumph!)

    Anyway, after I read that, I debated on whether giving Josh a number for a therapist. It “sounded” so….desperately important for him to resolve the anomie in his life. I wanted to say, cheer up, dude. Just think, Tomorrow is not only another day, it is tomorrow, too.

    So, cheer up. Be glad I didn’t run for office. The only office I will run for is when I need to relieve myself.

    God Bless you all! And, why the hell do I write these things?

  183. tallyHO
    November 9th, 2012 at 12:11 am [Reply]

    Mark Trail….

    hoo boy.

    Post-Coital Turtles.

    It had to happen sometime.

    Now, I won’t be able to read the comic strips for Friday. Turtle Lovin’ in my head!

  184. bats :[
    November 9th, 2012 at 12:35 am [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#173): dammit…this didn’t post, and I did it just for you, too!

  185. bbofun
    November 9th, 2012 at 12:37 am [Reply]

    @Northernlurker (#171): How long ago was that story arc? Because I believe the time scale for Mary Worth is 1M(rw)=2D(cst) (1 month in the real world equal 2 days in comic-strip time)

    Other strips have their own scales, of course. Gag-a-day strips are close to 1D(rw)=1D(cst), with slight variations. Serialized (but funny) strips (Sally Forth, FOOB[okay, I'm pushing the meaning of "funny" here]) are about 1W(rw)=1d(cst).

    Rex Morgan and Judge Parker, however, are a remarkable 4M(rw)=1D(cst)- although JP has stretched that even further.

    So, if the Mary Worth arc was, say, two years ago (real word) time, then it only happened about 2 and a half months ago (cst).

  186. bbofun
    November 9th, 2012 at 12:38 am [Reply]

    Of course in “gag-a-day” strips, the characters are also immortal and ageless, although birthdays will still be celebrated.

  187. bbofun
    November 9th, 2012 at 12:43 am [Reply]

    This is precisely the sort of thing that causes DC comics to decide to re-boot their comics every 15-20 years. Marvel, on the other hand, simply employs a “sliding time-scale”- the Fantastic Four, have gone from having their flight into space (where they gained their powers) being some of the first people in space to being the first private citizens to fly into space on their own to testing out a new type of propulsion to I don’t-know-what-now. All in the service of it being no more than 10 years since they started (as opposed to 50 years).

  188. Baka Gaijin
    November 9th, 2012 at 12:58 am [Reply]

    Friday’s Spiderman: Hmm, Petey, let’s see why Sherry Showgirl is attracted to Kraven. Exhibits bravery, check. Groovy cool clothes, check. Massive muscles, check. Doesn’t pout and whine like a 3 year old at the slightest provocation, check. Why Kraven might be attracted to Sherry: Showgirl, check.

    Friday’s One Big Happy: Ruthie’s friends include Ana Heim, Aziza, and Cuco Monga.

  189. Poteet
    November 9th, 2012 at 12:58 am [Reply]

    JP — I know a perfectly sane expert fly fisherman and there are many more, so the following only applies to Avery. He is going to put those photos of Old Hardy to use, and what he’s going to do as he looks at them, eww.

  190. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    November 9th, 2012 at 1:00 am [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#60): I know. First outfit he draws that I actually think is cute, and, whoosh! there it disappears, so he can indulge his leg fetish.

  191. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    November 9th, 2012 at 1:03 am [Reply]

    @teenchy (#117): I know. Wasn’t she just at college?

  192. Baka Gaijin
    November 9th, 2012 at 1:03 am [Reply]

    Second thought on Spiderman: Petey, Kraven’s secret to attracting the chicks is a dab or two on the pulse points of jungle cat pee.

  193. Poteet
    November 9th, 2012 at 1:04 am [Reply]

    MT — Wow, that’s some amazing insurance policy! Very impressive! The tragic mutant painted turtles that have been deprived of their beautiful orange and yellow markings are not so impressive. I know life is brutal, color monkeys, but please don’t take it out on the turtles.

  194. Poteet
    November 9th, 2012 at 1:06 am [Reply]

    MW — Why do her eyes keep shifting to Kewpie Doll mode? It’s creeping me out.

  195. Droopy Says
    November 9th, 2012 at 1:09 am [Reply]

    Spiderbland: Know what’s funny, Parker? Sherry is a reporter, too, and her boss got her on the Kraven story the same way Jameson did for you. Be glad that her editor didn’t consult with your editor, or you’d be wearing her costume right now.

    STFU, Wankerbean: “Serious stories blahblahblah,” said the stereotype to the carboard character.

    Family Circus: A jockey? Jeffy, you’ve set your goal too high. Aim for something a bit lower, like being a horse’s ass.

    Jugs Parker: Damn, I thought Bea was the one who’d save the day by walking in with the downloaded picture, but his crisis didn’t even make it to Saturday. Somebody knows how to drain the dramatic tension out of a story, don’t they?

    Mock Trail: Editorbillellis thinks his magazine has kidnapping insurance? Who knew Trail was such a hot commodity?

  196. Poteet
    November 9th, 2012 at 1:13 am [Reply]

    GA — “Fellers”???!! And look at those outfits and hairstyles. A3G, I do believe you’ve lost the Twilight Zone competition.

  197. Poteet
    November 9th, 2012 at 1:16 am [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#192): HAR!! I believe it. When I look at him, I can practically smell it. He may be the grossest supervillain I’ve ever seen.

  198. Droopy Says
    November 9th, 2012 at 1:23 am [Reply]

    9 Dickweed Lane: No Solange today, but a thought about her: does the end of the election cycle mean she’ll revert to acting like a higher form of life? Or will she keep talking like the rest of McEch’s characters?

  199. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    November 9th, 2012 at 1:41 am [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#190): Man, full view of the outfit today, and boy is it tacky.

  200. Droopy Says
    November 9th, 2012 at 2:22 am [Reply]

    I’m still bemused that Mark Trail’s magazine might have the kind of insurance that people might buy when they’re kidnapped. Editorbillellis “thinks” they have it. As a highly-placed executive in this organization, which evidently pays its writers about five hundred dollars per word, shoudn’t he be better-informed about the sort of insurance coverage that magazines offer their writers? It took him two days just to tell Cherry that her husband had done a Rusty. How long will it take him to search the files for his policy, contact the insurer, file a claim and get the money? And what’s the deductible on accident-prone outdoorsmen like Trail? For that matter, given Trail’s alarming record at stumbling over criminals, what if the magazine’s board of directors decided that the premiums were just too high on Trail? They might have pocketed the money and invested it in the southern part of the state.

  201. Droopy Says
    November 9th, 2012 at 2:25 am [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#199): No wonder Kraven wants to steal the tiara. It might actually improve that . . . that–is there a word for what he’s wearing? Can it be used in polite society, or should it be reserved for discussing 9CL?

  202. seismic-2
    November 9th, 2012 at 2:39 am [Reply]

    @bats :[ (#184): Thanks – much appreciated!!! You have made a profound improvement in the rendering of the character, which I pray to God will immediately be made canon by Mr. Giella. Of course, making her signature chapeau be a sack over her head would be a change that would perhaps be even more warmly welcomed by the comics-reading audience. Life is brutal.

  203. Droopy Says
    November 9th, 2012 at 3:20 am [Reply]

    Can you blame Phil Hitler for feeling upset? When he imagines that poor gopher in its bunker, cowering as an implacable force digs it out, he cannot help but think of those final days in Berlin.

  204. Droopy Says
    November 9th, 2012 at 3:26 am [Reply]

    Oh, yeah–what hapened to Luann? No less than two characters are being nice today, to the point of maturity. That’s pretty much what happened yesterday, too. I hope this starts a trend.

  205. Dale
    November 9th, 2012 at 5:54 am [Reply]

    @Droopy Says (#200):


    How can Bill prove that “Mark Trail” was kidnapped?
    Is this guy an actual employee or a free-lancer?
    Was he on an assignment or a pleasure trip using the company yacht?
    Got anything in writing?

  206. Dale
    November 9th, 2012 at 6:21 am [Reply]

    The time stamp looks like EST.
    It’s 06:21 here in Raleigh, NC, Eastern Time Zone.

  207. gleeb
    November 9th, 2012 at 6:57 am [Reply]

    ‘bean: Warming to his theme, Batiuk forgets to actually draw half his strip, filling it with airy blather on a subject no one asked about. And what he does draw is mostly bricks and yammering silhouettes. So much for a non-infantile strip, either in its story or art. Ironic and funny!

    Bubba’s Mineshaft: Bubba’s quick thinking prevents an Avery meltdown, darn it! Anyway, why was he able to extract the pictures but not eliminate them? And what else is that in Bubba’s hand? An eyepatch?

    Dick: Dazed and still in pain, Hideous Deformity lashes out! No doubt it’s just a clever decoy by Tracy (an actually good use of silhouettes). If only there was more than that fire for him to see by. Maybe some MOON light.

    Zig: That is, no sitting that will allow your caftan to ride up and expose your pantslessness.

  208. Vince M
    November 9th, 2012 at 9:25 am [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#179): I like that both Dionne Warwick and Shirley Bassey sang that song – similar orchestration, very different vocals.

    What surprised me is that Johnny Cash sang another alternate song for ‘Thunderball’. I was also surprised to hear Brian Wilson’s instrumental ‘Pet Sounds’ was allegedly his take on a Bond movie theme.

  209. Señor Tortilla
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    There was an old Dilbert comic strip where Dogbert wins millions in a lawsuit, and financing Dilbert’s “biodome” ideas (given that he got to pick the participants himself) wherein participants had to eat and live off plants inside the dome (which came too late before the dome was sealed)

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