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The plots thicken

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Oh-ho, “action” aplenty in the soaps today — let’s dive right in!

Apartment 3-G, 11/13/12

The Revenge of the Men for Margo’s many unspeakable crimes is here revealed as a one-two punch. Even as Evan the Earnest Mole conspires with his Aunt Cathy to bankrupt Margo’s publicity agency, Greg the Arrogant Actor plans to fatten her up on that mountain of generic Thai food. Soon, Margo will have no economic incentive to leave her apartment, and will be too wide to do so anyway — making the world a safer place for interchangeable men, but placing Lu Ann and Tommie in a world of hurt.

Mark Trail, 11/13/12

Did you wonder why Mark was so blasé about his kidnapping and island imprisonment? Well, panels two and three reveal that Mark can see into the future, accepting compliments before they are given, and doubtless foreseeing the hail of fists by which he will eventually secure his freedom. It’s a miracle anybody can sneak up behind this guy. I guess the ability to predict the future doesn’t mean you have to be paying attention.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 11/13/12

June got free clams and Rex got Internet fame, but Ginger wins the chest-off.

Mary Worth, 11/13/12

OK, it’s been hinted at that Jim is a possessive creep, but established beyond any doubt that he has ONLY ONE ARM. So how exactly is he grabbing Dawn in panel 2? And just what the HELL is he doing with his bottle of soda? I think the answers demand a much larger exclamation point than Dawn is giving us here.

Family Circus, 11/13/12

The original Family Circus gremlins, Not Me, Ida Know, and Nobody, are invisible scapegoats for the Keane Kids’ adorable transgressions. But newcomers Just B. Cause and O. Yeah aren’t objects of blame at all, but oddly-attired “things kids say when they’re being jerks.” If they live long enough to reach middle school, we can expect the Kids to give us strung-out junkie Whatevs, Vegas card-shark Deal With It, and the principal character from Marvin, O. Crap.

Hey, Thel — that kitchen is a pigsty. And hot dogs for dinner again? Seriously, woman, just what the hell do you do all day?

– Uncle Lumpy

179 responses to “The plots thicken”

  1. Inkwell
    November 13th, 2012 at 1:59 am [Reply]

    It seems like O. Yeah is actually helpful– coming along reminding the kids of things they would have otherwise forgotten.

    That’s even less funny than Not Me.

  2. Droopy Says
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:08 am [Reply]

    Spiderbland: She knows who she’s dealing with, Parker, and it isn’t you. Not by a long shot.

    Flunky Whatever: If there really is a special effects art club, we know one thing for certain: they don’t want their robots to look human. Good choice there, possibly-imaginary club officials!

    9CL: Solange is back. The bad news: she outputs a wall of text. The good news: Brooke has never been more eloquent.

    Dick: Read the fine print on the contest rules, Vitamin. They said the winner only had to look like one part of your anatomy. Don’t you regret that nude scene you did back in 1971?

    Mock Trail: Ohmigod a woman is smiling seductively at Trail, quick, initiate the desperate escape scenario!

    Jugs Parker: It isn’t a matter of have, Avery, it’s a matter of Bea not wanting to be had.

    Pluggers: A “Pluggers Classic” again? How hard can it be to do a new panel every day when it takes a minimal amount of work, the readers supply the “ideas,” and you know what they want?

    Mar’ma’duq: Of course the Hellhound is defensive of the empty house. If those walls could speak . . . well, they can, thanks to the ghosts of the family he killed there, and their revelations could end his apocalyptic ambitions.

  3. Mibbitmaker
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:10 am [Reply]

    FC: Seeing their new gremlin just now, I summoned one of my own: O. Brother!

    MW: And this one introduces a vastly creepier spirit of badness: O. Sister! This strip is about to get even more disturbing than usual, folks!

    RMMD: Looks like, in panel 1, Ginger is about to check out June’s chest for herself! Surely to test it for the contest, you understand. Aaaand…oop! Looks like Ginger’s actually doing it in panel 3!

    A3G: So, Greg, your proverb means that one should fill up on dinner first, THEN order something for dinner right afterward? Riiiiiiiiiight![/Bill Cosby's Noah bit]
    Not only that, but you guys are doing this all wrong! Thanksgiving isn’t until a week from Thursday, it’s too soon to be doing a bad immitation of the greatest Bob Newhart Show episode ever!

  4. Mibbitmaker
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:18 am [Reply]

    MT: In most kidnapping cases, a captive will speak in such a stilted manner as a result of Stockholm Syndrome and/or brainwashing. However, this being Mark Trail, that’s just the way everybody speaks. In other words, Stockholm Syndrome from years of captivity by Jack Elrod.

  5. This Guy
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:30 am [Reply]

    “I think my son is becoming attached to your dog, Mr. Trail!”
    “Andy is a great friend… he has saved my life many times! Also, he is extremely sticky. I beg you, in God’s name, do not ask why.”

    @Droopy Says (#2): Hey, give Brookins a break on “Plugger Classics.” He already has to spend WHOLE MINUTES each day thinking of an ancient joke to repurpose for Shoe.

  6. seismic-2
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:43 am [Reply]

    MT: “My friends like you, also! For a hostage we’re going to kill next week, you’re very popular in the community!”

    MW: “I want us to become more than friends. If you’ll just agree to be legally adopted by my parents, then you can become my sister!”

    FC: I hope Bill’s boss gets a glimpse at that pathetic flower on the window sill, before he too enters the Keane Kompound and has the life essence drained from him. He’d better, since those frankfurters look way too much like Soylent Green, if you catch my drift.

  7. Droopy Says
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:56 am [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#6): Good call on the flower, because by ancient tradition flowers always wilt in the presence of evil. Speaking of presence, where’s Billy, where did the sausages come from, and what has kept Thel too busy to keep her kitchen iimmaculate? So many questions, one obvious answer . . .

  8. Clint Brawny
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:36 am [Reply]

    Looks like bratwurst.

  9. Alfred E. Neuman
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:49 am [Reply]

    MW— I’m not sure those are soda bottles. In Panel 2, Jim is using his to show Dawn that if they can’t be more than friends, he will be her enema.

  10. tallyHO
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:57 am [Reply]

    Gonna hate myself for even considering this….

    Mary Worth:
    To answer Uncle Lumpy’s question of how Jim is doing that.
    Jim is secretly Doctor Cockterpus.


    //now to click post without previewing and forgetting I ever considered this, much more ever posted it at all.

  11. Calico
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:57 am [Reply]

    “I think my son is becoming attached to your dog, Mr. Trail! I mean literally!”

    RM – Steven Tyler makes a panel 2 cameo!

    MW – Jeez, creepy! Good on Mary for her suggestions, as usual.

  12. Dale
    November 13th, 2012 at 5:17 am [Reply]


    How does Otto figure in to this “friends” thing?
    Is Ava Maid Marian to Otto’s Robin Hood? (A little punctuation help here!)
    Is Otto like Jesse James, killer and thief, but popular in his own community?

  13. Liam
    November 13th, 2012 at 5:27 am [Reply]

    Gil Thorp-Nope. Terry was right. He never played football before and was drafted into playing football by a couch who doesn’t like it if people don’t play football.

  14. Rob in Maine
    November 13th, 2012 at 5:28 am [Reply]

    MW: This will take a sinister turn. Not only does Greg want an incestuous relationship with Dawn, his dead ringer for a dead sister, but it goes beyond that. He’s the next Arturo (q.v. Katherine Dunn’s novel _Geek Love_*) and Dawn will be cutting her own arm off!

    * From Wikipedia “The novel takes place in two time periods: the first deals with the Binewski children’s constant struggle against each other through life. They especially have to deal with the Machiavellian Arty as he develops his own cult: Arturism. In this cult, Arty persuades people to have their limbs amputated so that they can be like Arty, the cult leader, in their search for the principle he calls PIP (“Peace, Isolation, Purity”). Each member moves up in stages, losing increasingly significant chunks of their body, starting with their toes and fingers. As Arty battles his siblings to maintain control over his followers, competition between their respective freak shows slowly begins to take over their lives.”

  15. Ed Bob
    November 13th, 2012 at 5:34 am [Reply]

    MT–. . .and by my friends, I mean my breasts!

  16. John C Fremont
    November 13th, 2012 at 5:50 am [Reply]

    @Mibbitmaker (#3): “More goo to go!”

  17. Cloudbuster
    November 13th, 2012 at 5:53 am [Reply]

    Luann: When you’ve invested so much time in making a character as pathetic as Gunther, it’s difficult to then explain why anyone would be romantically interested in him. One might think an obvious solution would be to have Gunther display some redeeming qualities — bravery, compassion or honor, maybe. Evans, however, isn’t going for that crap! Gunther’s going to be utterly worthless in every respect, and Rosa’s going to like him that way! My alternate theory is that Evans considers “mewling, obsequious, needy and ineffectual” to be positive male character traits. There is much evidence for that theory in the panels of Luann. Ah, geek fantasies.

  18. gleeb
    November 13th, 2012 at 6:39 am [Reply]

    3-G: It was a love formed through a mutual interest in bulimia.

    Barney Google: Elviney escapes making a puppy pie (here dismissed as “chow”) by telling Lukey he would have to pay. The exact nature of the payment id best left unexamined. Lukey’s old bitch doesn’t look too happy, as no doubt this just means other Hootin Holler denizens will be devouring her young.

    ‘shaft: Go on, run over a child with that thing. You’ll feel better.

    ‘bean: So, Owen the Idiot and hi semi-anonymous friend are in a class set up jointly by the fine and industrial arts faculties to get guys like Owen away from their talented students. The world makes sense again.

    Down the Shaft: Bubba is loving this. A brisk morning scotch, and soon, the pleasure of Bea doing the dirty work of killing Avery.

    Phantom: The old an could be inadvertently right, too. Strip mining has never been a clean process, and disruption to the river could change patterns of animal behavior. Here’s the thing, though, :his is really more of a Mark Trail kind of story.

    Dick: It’s a trap! Shoot to kill, Tracy!

  19. gleeb
    November 13th, 2012 at 6:41 am [Reply]

    I seem to have dropped several letters. Just sprinkle these over my post: s m t

  20. jzimbert
    November 13th, 2012 at 6:50 am [Reply]

    I know I’ve seen that Family Circus panel before. I had a little book of FCs when I was a kid, and I’m pretty sure this was in it. The ghost is a new addition, of course.

  21. Chareth Cutestory
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:04 am [Reply]

    Mary Worth: While I praise the artists’s attempt at showing Dawn drinking from a straw, I’m still reserving the right to laugh at it.

  22. Nate
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:33 am [Reply]

    SerIously, Thel, it’s not like you ever leave the kitchen. Or even COULD leave the kitchen, as apparently there’s a void of inky black nothing outside. Just stand at the sink, staring into the abyss, and wash the damn dishes.

  23. Here come the Judge
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:42 am [Reply]

    In Mary Worth, Jim appears to be in the process of transforming into one of the creatures in the Mos Eisley Cantina from Star Wars.

  24. KreatureFeatures
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:46 am [Reply]

    MT: “See how my son’s hair has become sunbleached to a horrible yellow? We desperately need your ransom money to buy more black hair dye.”

  25. Steve
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:46 am [Reply]

    FC: I guess the joke here is that five-year-olds are bad at taking phone messages? Of course they are, they’re five. Why would the father make her do that?

    Fun fact, five-year-olds are also bad at driving.

  26. sporknpork
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:50 am [Reply]

    Did Mark reverse time? Are we now going to experience the strip in backwards chronology?

  27. nescio
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:50 am [Reply]

    FC: “Of course Mommy knows already. That was the entire purpose of killing Billy to make another serving of meat! And what a struggle that was!”

    “O. Yeah!”

  28. sporknpork
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:52 am [Reply]

    And just like the Kool-Aid man, O. Yeah is breaking the fourth wall.

  29. CanuckDownSouth
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:58 am [Reply]

    So the message of Mark Trail is don’t fear that your loved ones, visiting a less-stable part of the world, might be kidnapped and their lives threatened for ransom, rather fear that they’ll be kidnapped and leave you because the abductors are prettier or more fun?

  30. ArchieNemesis
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:00 am [Reply]

    That’s right, Mr. Weatherbee, you had to ask. Your designated role as the straight main to Archie’s buffoon requires you to do so. If you don’t like it, you can leave.

  31. Horace Broon aka Doc
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:11 am [Reply]

    BB: The Walkers are off their meds again…

    FC: I’ve not seen a panel with Just B. Cause, but I assume he’s the kids’ answer to questions of the “why are you…” variety. Which is, of course, reaping what you sow, because kids only think “because” is a valid answer since it’s so often the answer to questions of the “why do I have to…” variety.

    HtH: “Blast! Now we have to wait here patiently, and all the good stuff will be gone before we can put everyone to the sword and loot it!”

    H&L: It’s funny because the economy’s in trouble and everyone’s poor!

    JP: Bubba smugly drinks his scotch, apparently under the impression that he’s played matchmaker here.

  32. Mumblix Grumph
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:16 am [Reply]

    FC: O Yeah? I prefer Curtis’ anthropomorphic phrase, O Snap!

  33. lynn
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:19 am [Reply]

    I think Jon Arbuckle and Luann’s Gunther would get along well, don’t you?

  34. lynn
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:23 am [Reply]

    FC: Dad Keane is a moron if he thought one of his moronic children would pass along an important message. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, I guess.

  35. lynn
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:24 am [Reply]

    Of course, Dad Keane could be bucking for a raise. Or the euthanasia benefit on his health insurance.

  36. lynn
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:25 am [Reply]

    “Family Circus: Making the Moore and Winkerbean families look functional for over fifty years.”

  37. pugfuggly
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:27 am [Reply]

    A3G In this modern day retelling of Snow White, Evan is the witch, the apple is thai food, and I guess Tommie and Lu Ann are the dwarves…

    MT “No really, my son got into the roofing tar a few minutes ago. They’re completely attached now.”

    MW “Oh YES Jim, but first, please tell me again how much I remind you of your sister…!”

    FC O. Yeah: the hilarious bearded professor ghost who comes to your house and beats the shit out of your kids until they forget what they were doing!

  38. Doctor Handsome
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:31 am [Reply]

    “Dawn, I’m tired of playing games. You can date me or not, just stop bogarting that keyboard cleaner. Daddy needs a huff.”

  39. Liam
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:35 am [Reply]

    MW-I want us to become friends with benefits.

    MT-Your son’s hair color has also changed since we last saw him.

  40. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:40 am [Reply]

    MT: What would be the version of Stockholm Syndrome in which the hostage is completely incapable of any kind of emotional attachment?

    And I’m waiting for the moment of rescue/escape, when Andy reveals he can speak human: “Uh, you go on ahead, Mark. I think I’ll stick around here for a while with the normal-looking kid, his hot mom, and all the fish heads I can eat.”

    MW: Dawn is stunned because no male person as ever indicated to her that he wants to be more than friends. “! This is the moment I’ve longed for: someone ambulatory with a penis who’s interested in me! But he’s a one-armed, sister-loving control freak—what shall I do?”

    JP: Bubba’s leer suggests that he’s waiting for the inevitable consummation of Avery’s and Bea’s “partnership,” right there on the floor in front of him. “Mein shaft,” indeed.

  41. Doctor Handsome
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:49 am [Reply]

    O. Henry is famous for clever wordplay, and narratives that subvert readers’ expectations. O. Yeah’s in The Family Circus. So obviously, one of them is a Bizzarro.

  42. Christopher
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:55 am [Reply]

    Apartment 3-G: “Oh yeah, I’m also off my medication, which is why all I bought is saltines and salt.”

    Mary Worth: “Tell me, Dawn, have you ever heard of Fatty Arbuckle?”

  43. Johnny Knuckles
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:56 am [Reply]

    @Ed Bob (#15): And you know she’s holding both breasts up-and-in as she’s saying it.

  44. hogenmogen
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:07 am [Reply]

    Thel: Why didn’t you just text me?
    Bil: O Yeah!

    I declare this new Keane invisible scapegoat to be super-lame for the following reason: It defies the rules under which invisible scapegoats must exist! The other anthropomorphic concepts were as a response to specific identity questions (ie. “Who smells like they crapped themselves?” “Not Me!” “Ida Know!”). Dolly wasn’t addressing Mr. Yeah. She was talking to her mother. You wouldn’t shout some random person’s name before passing out information (except in this context: “Margo! I just busted my boxcarthumb with a Saturnhammer!”).

    For all the vitriol that I can muster against this new incarnation of stupidity, I do have a soft spot in my heart for the societal miscreant, Jeffy. Look a the insolent way he leans on that cabinet, indifferent to the dirt smudge on his face, hands deep in pockets and hat askew in an I-don’t-give-a-crap attitude. Although obscured from view from the low res artwork, you know he’s chewing a toothpick. Or tobacco.

  45. S. Stout
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:08 am [Reply]

    Jim: Jim really wants to have sex with his sister…err, Dawn.

    Luann: Why didn’t Luann laugh hysterically when asked if she dated Gunther?

  46. hogenmogen
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:09 am [Reply]

    “My friends like you also. I, on the other hand, find you an arrogant, unfeeling snot. And your dog slobbers and farts too much.”

  47. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:13 am [Reply]

    Love Is . . .putting away the toys during the post-O nap.

    (if I were bats :[, and I’m most certainly not, replacing the various items with Rabbit vibes, handcuffs, Hitachi Magic Wands and the like might be amusing. But far too much work.)(I had another, ruder thought, but the above fits the drawing better.)

  48. Artist formerly known as Ben
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:20 am [Reply]

    A3G: These two are gonna feel weird after they chow down on those packages of salt and sugar.

    MT: Mark kicks back and relaxes on the exclusive Pirate Abduction Getaway vacation package.

    RMMD: Shock lines emanate from June as her irises threaten to escape from her eyes. San Diego loves Rex? Hell, she just tolerates him because it’s nice to live in a house with four bathrooms.

    Yester-MW: Psst, Giella. If you and Moy insist on your 1980s characters only seeing movies from 1950 and before, you might at least familiarize yourself with the actual ”Casablanca” movie poster.

    Today-MW: Jim comes uncomfortably close to saying that when he thinks about Dawn he touches himself. Especially the way that straw is pointed.

    FC: Joining the august ranks of Not Me and Ida No is a walking scrotum with a mortarboard. Huzzah!

    Better Half: “Well that doesn’t sound too good. But, uh, what’s intimate physical contact?”

    Archie: Mr. Svensen will be relieved that at least Archie didn’t give her a load of bullshit like the last time. Now that was a all-day cleaning job.

    GA: You’re Slim Skinner’s grandson. You’re supposed to be brainless, not spineless.

    BB: Quickly, Zero become’s Sgt Snorkel’s favorite private for his ability to bring venison dinners into the camp.

    GT: “Oh, I get it now. They’re a bunch of chumps then.”

    Luann: Gunther annoys me too, but I don’t think his holding my hand would help. That’s where Rosa and I differ, I guess.

    Marvin: You’re talking to the right guy. Marvin’s family know just how hard it is to pull off a baby replacement.

    Lockhorns: “The rest of the time I just give him a boot up the ass.”

  49. Marc
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:28 am [Reply]

    A3G- The lesson here is don’t order food when you’re hungry. Got it Greg, thanks for the heads up.

    Mark Trail- For a poor little island that is completely separated from the politics and ammenities of the main island, they sure do have a fully functioning barber shop. Why they felt the need to bleach the kid’s hair though, I don’t know. Mark originally agreed to play with Ava’s son because he had a healthy crop of thick black hair. Now he seems a little put off by that illegitimate blonde boy fondling his dog.

    Mary Worth- And by more than friends, Jim means he wants Dawns to give him her left arm. Turns out that Jim’s insurance won’t cover that whole prosthetic thing, so this is his only hope of ever having two arms again. Damn that California Fire, Life, and Limb LLC.

    Funky- Don’t you just like to smash those two nimrod’s heads together? I know I do.

    Luann- When the guy is terrified to even hold your hand and spends more time working on wormcock costumes than he does with you, it’s probably time to cut it off and let him hang around the inside of his closet alone.

    Cranky- Careful Cranky, you don’t want a snowblower accident. That’s how armless Joe lost his leg.

  50. terrapin
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:30 am [Reply]

    Luann: Don’t worry, Rosa. He’ll be thinking of you tonite, while using that hand for… something else.

    MW: Can’t wait for tomorrow, when Jim transforms into Micheal Jackson and does the zombie dance.

  51. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:30 am [Reply]

    MT – Given the pale complexion and blonde hair on the child, I’m beginning to suspect that Mark has fallen into a secret off-shore genetic experiment. They hold their American victim for a week, assign a fertile partner to bond with him, then a week later they announce that the ransom has not been paid and execute the sperm donor.

    However, I fear that they have bitten off more than they can chew this time. If they want Mark to contribute his genetic material, that is going to prove to literally be a tough nut to crack.

  52. Marc
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:30 am [Reply]

    Family Circus- When did Jeffy join an early 90′s all white street gang?

  53. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:34 am [Reply]

    @Marc (#49):

    Cranky- Careful Cranky, you don’t want a snowblower accident. That’s how armless Joe lost his leg.

    Not just a leg. Hundreds of people every year lose their tongue to frostbite as part of a snowblowing accident!

  54. Elmo
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:37 am [Reply]

    Mark Trail is a Time Lord?

  55. Darryl Heine
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:38 am [Reply]

    Regarding the Family Circus strip: Even the kitchen and kids are resembling a circa 1991-1992 Nirvana style grunge look, but not O YEAH!

  56. Greg
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:44 am [Reply]

    MW: Careful, Dawn, he’s about to cleave you in two with his yellow hair! Wait… shouldn’t he be in Spider-Man? Blando! Watch him squeeze water from a bottle with his one arm! Thrill as Spider-Man takes a bong hit from a honey bear…!

  57. seismic-2
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:47 am [Reply]

    @Elmo (#54): That might help explain why people in this strip keep changing their appearance, depending on which clip-art file is being used on any given today. Also, those aren’t just ginormous chipmunks – they’re ginormous Gallifreyan chipmunks, which is why they can make word balloons emerge from their rear ends.

  58. tb4000
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:49 am [Reply]

    RMMD: “Nobody beats me in the obscenely perky tits department, see? Nobody!”

  59. Artist formerly known as Ben
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:50 am [Reply]

    @terrapin (#50):

    MW: Can’t wait for tomorrow, when Jim transforms into Micheal Jackson and does the zombie dance.

    “I’m not like other guys. At least not outside certain royal families.”

  60. Illustrator Steve
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:57 am [Reply]

    MT – “I think my son is becoming attached to your dog, Mister Trail.”
    “Nah, your son is just listening to the sounds coming from some sort of new fangled electronic devise that Andy swallowed while coming down here on the yacht. The crew called it an eye phone or I phone or some danged thing. Ever since then Andy has been broadcasting hourly weather updates and the crew told me it also sends out GPS coordinates to all of the Coast Guard’s search and rescue units. Dang fool dog will eat ANYTHING!!”

  61. Ranger
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:58 am [Reply]

    ASM: Ok, this is sad. It is obvious that the hot dancer is going to try to steal the whatever it was and frame Kraven. Spider Sense my ass! I think Peter needs to introduce his new hero, The Janitor. He can accidentally catch people by forgetting to put out the Wet Floor sign.

  62. Mibbitmaker
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:59 am [Reply]

    @John C Fremont (#16): “Moo goo goo goo…”

  63. Voshkod
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:01 am [Reply]

    At first glance, I thought “O. Yeah” had a knife through his skull, as opposed to a graduation mortarboard. But then I realized that would have made him “O. No,” the ghost of the missing Keane kid that Jeffy dispatched a few months back. And I think I would have remembered that comic. “Who killed your brother?” “Not me.”

  64. Illustrator Steve
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:07 am [Reply]

    MT – “My friends like you also, and we all will make your stay with us as comfortable as possible until your execution. …You may say this is your LAST RESORT! ™”
    “WELL then…. that accounts for WHY the nuclear submarine USS Colorado is ancored in the little village’s harbor!”

  65. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:08 am [Reply]

    Beetle – In panel 1, an animal thing is hitchhiking. In panel 2, Zero explains that he was hitchhiking! Ha ha! Because he was hitchhiking and then Zero said he was hitchhiking! And he’s some kind of animal!!

    Smirky – This strip was funny in the 70s. I think it was on a Thursday.

    Slylock – Six Differences: six freckles. done.

    Hi – Buy Lo’, sell Hi.

  66. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:08 am [Reply]

    Mark – “Seriously, Mr. Trail, your dog and my son seem to be becoming some kind of unholy human-beast abomination. Next thing you know, they’ll be hitchhiking to Camp Swampy. Together.”

    Mutt – While I wasn’t looking, this strip has changed decades! We’re somewhere in the four-panel years of Al Smith now. 1950s?

  67. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:10 am [Reply]

    @how to watch tv on your computer (#yy125): Ooh! Ooh! Send this link to me five or ten years ago, when I might have cared!

    Lumpy – I dealt with the Family gremlins some years back in a never-actually-drawn final Sunday panel where the police are trying to make sense of the gory murder-suicide scene at the Keane household even as “Not Me” and “Ida Know” edge nervously away from Billy’s latest and last invisible enabler, “Fuh Q, I M Drunk.”

  68. Ranger
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:13 am [Reply]

    MT: I just noticed, these are the absolute whitest Caribbean island natives I have ever seen.

  69. Illustrator Steve
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:19 am [Reply]

    MT – (Blond bastard son of Senora Momjeans): “*HICK*! Hey, Mommy!*HICK* You gotta taste shum of thish deelishioussh root beer that Andy dog keepsh in thish little wooden keg hidden in hish hair under hish neck!! *HICK*!”

  70. TheDiva
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:23 am [Reply]

    A3G: What Thai place lets you order staples from the bakery aisle for take-out?

    MT: Figures Mark would bond with the only Aryan kid in the Caribbean.

    MW: Now we’re getting somewhere! Jim has the potential to be the most delightfully crazy, creepy antagonist since Charley Smith and his swingin’ bachelor pad!

  71. Inexplicable Bear Tongue
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:23 am [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#17): Re: Luann

    I think it’s just wistful wishful thinking on Evans’ part. Wouldn’t it have been great if hot girls pursued me romantically in high school, demanding to hold my hand? (Me being a socially retarded, totally unremarkable dope) And when I got all sheepish and shy and weird about the prospect of holding this hot girl’s hand, she INSISTED, pushing herself on me until I had to accept her romantic overtures? I mean… hot romance with a hot chick! And I didn’t even have to do anything!

  72. Liam
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:30 am [Reply]

    MT-You don’t want your son becoming to attached to Andy or else Andy will absorb your son into his body.

  73. CanuckDownSouth
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:37 am [Reply]

    @Inexplicable Bear Tongue (#71): Yesterday’s Luann made me cringe for just that reason, but today’s has some sure-to-be-disappointed hope that Evans realizes this is nuts, because Rosa is getting upset by this. As well she should.

  74. Mibbitmaker
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:38 am [Reply]

    DT: Stupid, isn’t it?

    Doones: Pierce Hawthorne beat him to it!

    JP: Bubba’s a real fan of the Roman Gladiators and their carnage. And here we have a battle Louie DePalma vs. Sarah Palin AND Roseanne! The Tiny Taxi Titan vs. Two Kinds of Deadly (Sarah’s guns and Rosey’s mouth)! A real bloodbath. This will be Bubba’s Finest Hour!

    ZtP: Then, suddenly, a mob of people mistake Ludwig for a true mental patient, deem him a danger to the community, and promptly gang up on him, beating him up and killing him, the end.
    This has been another of “Mr. Mike’s MOST-loved Bedtime Tales”!

  75. Dood
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:38 am [Reply]

    Family Circus: Why is this “O. Yeah!” guy depicted as some sort of a wise bearded academician? Has he been endeavoring to study this oddly dysfunctional family lo these many decades to secure a tenured professorship somewhere?

  76. Dood
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:40 am [Reply]

    Family Circus: And speaking of gremlins, does “O. Yeah’s” cousin, “O. Yes-Yes-Yes-Yes!” hang out in Bill and Thel’s bedroom?

  77. TheDiva
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:45 am [Reply]

    9CL: Panel one is the most intelligent Wall O’ Text Brooke has put out.

    C’shaft: You’re just pissed because there’s no property for you to damage.

    FW: The idea of a special effects art class is too cool for a) these characters, b) this school and c) this strip.

    HotC: Heart hits the nail on the head–at this stage in the franchise, a change in management could hardly make things worse.

    Luann: Credit where it’s due, this is the closest Luann has come to admitting Guther’s behavior is creepy and repulsive. Of course this will all end with Rosa being in the wrong for not appreciating the unique needs of her Self-Proclaimed Nice Guy suitor, so it won’t last.

    Pibgorn: Well, at least they both shut up.

    Pluggers don’t know what pate looks like or how it tastes, but them ferrin’ foods is pretty much the same, right?

    SM: Well, she realizes she’s not dealing with you, and thats enough.

  78. seismic-2
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:48 am [Reply]

    @John C Fremont (#16), @Mibbitmaker (#62): Given Margo’s enthusiasm for bourbon, I must confess that I am looking forward to seeing her demeanor in the aftermath of the worst defeat in William and Mary’s history.

  79. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:49 am [Reply]

    On The Fastrack — Art is just SICK! Even the Computer Bug doesn’t deserve that!

  80. TheDiva
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:49 am [Reply]

    @Inexplicable Bear Tongue (#71): Yep, that’s the ultimate Self-Proclaimed Nice Guy fantasy right there. “I shouldn’t need to do anything to cultivate a meaningful relationship with a woman–they should be falling in line to admire my nice niceness!”

  81. Austria
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:49 am [Reply]

    Arch: The first panel is funnier than the rest of the strip.

    BB: In which Walker confuses himself with Dr. Seuss.

    FC: I’m getting a distinct “college professor” vibe from O. Yeah. Is he supposed to represent the forgetful professor? The nutty professor? I don’t get it.

    MW: Oyez! Oyez! Ye 19-year-old completely oblivious to established tropes!

  82. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:50 am [Reply]

    @Dood (#76):

    Unfortunately, the only gremlin in their bedroom lately has been “O. ye- ooops. Sorry, been distracted lately. Maybe try again next week?”

  83. seismic-2
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:56 am [Reply]

    @Dood (#75): In today’s daring cross-over episode, the role of O. Yeah! is played by Prof. Ian Cameron. Pool party!

  84. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:02 am [Reply]

  85. AhClem
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:03 am [Reply]

    MT – The woman in the third panel looks human and even female-like. Okay, guest artist, who are you and what have you done with Jack Elrod?

  86. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:03 am [Reply]

    and squee!

    ikkle tapir not safe for Hannalore.

    meanwhile, on Poteet’s porch.

    otter can see clearly now, the rain is gone.

    The Daily Puppy is Olive the black Lab. (omg, the extra pics on TDP are keeewwwwwwttttttt!!!)

    Corgiscism Tango.

    bellehrubz naow?

  87. Uncle Lumpy
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:08 am [Reply]

    @Dood (#76):

    … does “O. Yeah’s” cousin, “O. Yes-Yes-Yes-Yes!” hang out in Bill and Thel’s bedroom?

    You’re thinking of “O. There, there, dear – don’t worry, it happens to a lot of guys.”

  88. batgirl
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:10 am [Reply]

    Okay, Dawn’s hair has always been unnatural, but today’s is extreme. It’s clinging to her head like molded plastic, when by the angle of her recoil from Jim it should be swinging back and down. How much hairspray does she go through a day?

  89. Inexplicable Bear Tongue
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:17 am [Reply]

    @CanuckDownSouth (#73): Luann: Nah, she’s getting upset because he won’t return her advances, so she goes off to this girl Gunther used to date with the intention of figuring out from her how to get him to loosen up and accept her advances. She’s PURSUING him, and REALLY committed to it! And remember how this is following up the mini-plot about how Knute is a gentleman, and that Rosa complimented Gunther on his “gentlemanly” walking her to her class. I bet that will factor in to what Luann tells Rosa, that she needs to remember that Gunther is *just that good* and needs to be considered that way.

    It’s pretty sick, and is absolutely a part of the Nice Guy trope. If only every beauty queen knew what a great guy I really am, they’d be fighting each other for my affections, and I’m such a great gentleman that I’d turn them all down for fighting.

  90. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:17 am [Reply]

    @Clint Brawny (#8): As in, pig meat? Heathens!

  91. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:26 am [Reply]

    @jzimbert (#20): I’m pretty sure both FC and Dilbert are reruns today. I can’t prove it, though.

  92. Shrug, Speaker to My Fellow Norwegians, But Of Course Only in a Subdued Polite Monotone
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:27 am [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#40):

    “MT: What would be the version of Stockholm Syndrome in which the hostage is completely incapable of any kind of emotional attachment?”

    Oslo Syndrome.

    // I also do “Ole and Lena” jokes.

  93. Amos Snarkadder, CQB
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:31 am [Reply]

    MW The pier! The pier! Run to the pier, Dawn! He won’t follow you there.

    Crankedshaft So, who forced the old man out in the cold to clear the snow from the driveway, probably endangering his life? Oh, right. They all did.

  94. Gringo
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:32 am [Reply]

    A3G: Greg’s “takeout” looks like nothing more than numerous containers of salt. Maybe he has sussed out after all that Margo is indeed a witch.

    Or a ghost. I can’t remember which one doesn’t like salt. Maybe Margo’s a slug, or a leech.

  95. Cooler King
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:35 am [Reply]

    FC: Frustrated by his lack of action in recent Mary Worth storylines, Professor Ian Cameron begins moonlighting in the Family Circus as O. Yeah.

  96. Karmyn
    November 13th, 2012 at 12:03 pm [Reply]

    Mary Worth- Why are Jim and Dawn drinking dishwashing liquid?

  97. This Guy
    November 13th, 2012 at 12:21 pm [Reply]

    9CL: I was very skeptical about Brooke managing a piece of realistic, coherent dialogue, but panel one made me a believer. Well done, Brooke.

  98. Stroker Ace
    November 13th, 2012 at 12:36 pm [Reply]

    FC – “Oooh Yeah!” died with ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage. “I Vanna D. Vorce” would be a lively addition to Klan Keane.

  99. No Stupid Bear
    November 13th, 2012 at 12:41 pm [Reply]

    MW: Jim brings the phrase “being a douche” to horrifying new levels of literalism.

  100. Marc
    November 13th, 2012 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

    @Dood (#76): O. Yes-Yes-Yes-Yes hasn’t resides in Bil and Thel’s bedroom since about 1959.

  101. Ubiq
    November 13th, 2012 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

    Anybody ever try and pick voices for the various Keantergeists? I didn’t until I saw O. Yeah, which is definitely Macho Man Randy Savage.

    “Better tell Mommy that Daddy’s coming home with the Boss. OOOOOHH YEAAAAAAH!”

  102. Marc
    November 13th, 2012 at 12:52 pm [Reply]

    (Kool-Aid Guy crashes through the wall) Oh yeaaaah!

    “Okay, can I ask everyone to please stop saying “Oh yeah” in this courtroom? Cause the fucking Kool-Aid Guy’s gonna keep showin’ up. Thank you.”

  103. MySpoonIsTooBig
    November 13th, 2012 at 12:53 pm [Reply]

    Back in the day, the day being late 90s when I non-ironically read Luann (i was 14 dammit) Gunther actually took the initiative to kiss Luann on several occasions, asked her out, and later on asked out her friend Bernice. And this was back when he had big ole nerd glasses, so I guess this makes him the first guy to invert the trope of glasses come off= ladies man?

    Whatever, between this and Funky Winkerbean I just don’t like nerds right now (and I have my share of nerdishness too)

  104. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    November 13th, 2012 at 12:55 pm [Reply]

    @Ubiq (#101): *flashbacks of Miss Elizabeth and Mr. McMahan*

    *goes for the brainbleach*

  105. terrapin
    November 13th, 2012 at 12:58 pm [Reply]

    @Karmyn (#96): So their colons will be sqeeky clean?

  106. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    November 13th, 2012 at 1:07 pm [Reply]

    intriguedmildly interested by one of the banners, I took a look at ~6 weeks of The Meaning of Lila.


    just wow.

    Sex in the City wants their cliches back.

    talk about Dusbin level drivel.

  107. Liam
    November 13th, 2012 at 1:10 pm [Reply]

    FC-That doesn’t look like the Kool Aid Man.

    Garfield-Sadly John wasn’t in the tutu.

    RMMD-”What? But what we did was supposed to be private. How did our sex tape get on the Internet?”

  108. Daniel
    November 13th, 2012 at 1:14 pm [Reply]

    FC This one’s old enough to have been in the DFC.

  109. La Cieca
    November 13th, 2012 at 1:32 pm [Reply]

    The profile exposed in the second MW panel confirms my long-held suspicion that Jim is actually Mary in a blond wig and male drag. The whole arc, it turns out, is about a bizarre post-menopausal Sapphic plot to ensnare Dawn as Mary’s love object. Yes, I hear you asking: but how is Mary faking a missing limb? To which I reply: child’s play to a woman who can contrive the sinking of a cruise ship half a world away!

  110. hogenmogen
    November 13th, 2012 at 1:41 pm [Reply]

    @sporknpork (#28): “And just like the Kool-Aid man, O. Yeah is breaking the fourth wall.”

    Ha! Don’t compare Kool Aid and O. Yeah. They’re not in the same league because they’re not even in the same sport! The children would cry out and Kool Aid would come to the rescue! What does O. Yeah do – run from the scene like a dog from a smelly toot? Kool Aid would break down the mightiest walls, but O. Yeah isn’t even interesting enough to have caused the hygenic disaster of the Keane Kitchen. You could tell what Kool Aid was. He was the biggest friggin’ pitcher of Kool Aid that you ever laid eyes on. What is this O. Yeah freak? He’s got six chins and why the hell is he wearing that graduation cap? Kool Aid had presence. O. Yeah is the very embodiment of nothingness. A transparent non-entity. Don’t drag my Kool Aid through the same mud that O. Yeah wallows in! I mean it, man!

  111. Braniff
    November 13th, 2012 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

    FC: Do Thel or O. Yeah have a cousin named “Ima Hogg”?

  112. hogenmogen
    November 13th, 2012 at 1:47 pm [Reply]

    “We heard what you and Rex did…”

    June didn’t do shit but eat free clams.

  113. Calico
    November 13th, 2012 at 1:50 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#67):
    There’s another invisible excuse-monger, named “Mr. Trazadone.”

    I like how the little flower on the windowsill is drooping/slumping, just like Jeffy. Looks like something out of 6 Differences.

  114. seismic-2
    November 13th, 2012 at 1:54 pm [Reply]

    @MySpoonIsTooBig (#103): I guess this makes him the first guy to invert the trope of glasses come off= ladies man?

    Actually, that may have been Clark Kent.

    RMMD: “He was just on TV… San Diego loves him!” Your cable channel has just about run out of porn if it’s sunk to airing Rex Does San Diego.

  115. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    November 13th, 2012 at 1:58 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#84): commodorejohn’s pc might need some software maintenance. Other than that, it looks fine to me. Trust me; I’m a CompTIA-certified A+ hardware technician. :)

  116. Inkwell
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:03 pm [Reply]

    Y’know, Gunther was always my favorite Luann character (that is, the only one I liked) because he was dweeby and he had serious flaws that Evans didn’t try to spin into something romantic.

    Now my hate level for Gunther is slightly higher than that of T.J..

  117. Calico
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:04 pm [Reply]

    @Horace Broon aka Doc (#31):
    Avery and Bea, the new Lockhorns, Scotch and all.
    Although, even Leroy doesn’t get drunk before noon.

  118. Mysterious shirtless lawyer
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:12 pm [Reply]

    “My friends like you also.”

    “Thank you.”

    “And I like you also.”

    “Thank you again.”

    “Would you consider also, receipt of most excellent blow-job? I am most skillful in the satisfaction of men!”

  119. hogenmogen
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:20 pm [Reply]

    SM: I have no idea what you’re up to, Kraven, but I have unfounded suspicions! Yes, I’m telling you that I’m watching you so that you know that you’re being watched! I’m also extremely jealous that you’re hooking up with a hottie, so I’m going to run interference like a total petulant dick. Wha..? Why, yes, I did graduate from the Inspector Cluseau Mail-Order Spy School. I was top of my class.

  120. commodorejohn
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:24 pm [Reply]

    Seriously, woman, just what the hell do you do all day?

    Drink the pain away, I’d expect…

  121. hogenmogen
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:29 pm [Reply]

    Greg: Margo, you don’t have to like me, just help me eat this ridiculous amount of take out!

    Margo: Omigosh, Greg! You’re right! I don’t like you at all, you two-timing, bottom-feeding worm! You’re less than nothing to me! Oh, and, uh, this is the receipt for paying my invoice. You can take a credit next month because you paid early but didn’t calculate out the deduction.

  122. bbofun
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:44 pm [Reply]

    Uncle Lumpy, re:A3G-”Soon, Margo will have no economic incentive to leave her apartment, and will be too wide to do so anyway — making the world a safer place for interchangeable men, but placing Lu Ann and Tommie in a world of hurt.”

    So, win-win, all around, then?

  123. bbofun
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:46 pm [Reply]

    RMMD- June is shocked to hear San Diego love Rex. “Wait until they get to know him” she thinks.

  124. Little Guy
    November 13th, 2012 at 2:57 pm [Reply]

    FC: Looks like Jeff Keane is drinking the Kool-Aid again.

  125. Little Guy
    November 13th, 2012 at 3:00 pm [Reply]

    FC, by O. Yeah: “Mommy, this captive kid is so much trouble, maybe we should send him back.”

  126. bats :[
    November 13th, 2012 at 3:24 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#17): maybe if things could move along faster than a bookworm’s pace, the whole thing would be more interesting…

  127. Anonymous
    November 13th, 2012 at 3:55 pm [Reply]

    @hogenmogen (#110): If the Kool-Aid pitcher-person burst into Family Circus through the kitchen wall, he’d be wearing a big, wide, happy, ear-to-ear Kool-Aid smile. Kill me now for remembering this.

  128. Dood
    November 13th, 2012 at 3:57 pm [Reply]

    @Anonymous (#127): O. Yeah, that was me.

  129. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    November 13th, 2012 at 3:59 pm [Reply]

    @Inkwell (#116): Maybe this is Evan’s secret retirement strategy: slowly bring us to the point of loathing every single one of his characters, so that we won’t miss the strip when it’s gone.

    When Puddles starts behaving like a dick, the end is near.

  130. Calico
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:00 pm [Reply]

    @Dood (#128):
    O. Yeah?

    I kind of like this way of bursting through a wall (early ’80′s vid, probably not safe for work and not for kidz)

  131. sporknpork
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:08 pm [Reply]

    Apparently Greg’s idea of takeout is buying up an entire grocery aisle of Domino sugar.

  132. sporknpork
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:14 pm [Reply]

    @hogenmogen (#110): Don’t get me wrong, man. That little popcorn-headed specter wannabe ain’t got shit on Kool-Aid!

  133. bats :[
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:21 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#48): funny, I saw the mortarboard first, and wondered why it was there. The scrotum resemblance…eh.

  134. Calico
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:24 pm [Reply]

    @sporknpork (#131):
    That, and Morton salt.

  135. bats :[
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:37 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#86): o da little watermelon bebeh tapir! <3

  136. Marc
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:38 pm [Reply]

    @MySpoonIsTooBig (#103): If you’re going nerd bashing, can I come too?

  137. Dood
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:43 pm [Reply]

    Apartment 3-G: Doesn’t Margo always play this cute word game when reading a fortune cookie’s message by adding the phrase “after I kill you”?

  138. Sgt. Stoned
    November 13th, 2012 at 4:50 pm [Reply]

    MT: Is that the look of love in Ava’s eyes? Ha-ha. Boy, are you barking up the wrong tree, lady!

  139. Calico
    November 13th, 2012 at 5:00 pm [Reply]

    For Thel – always use the good paper napkins, at least!

  140. seismic-2
    November 13th, 2012 at 5:06 pm [Reply]

    DT: Can we just skip this dumb story about the Flintheart look-alike contest that’s won by Walt Wallet, who doesn’t actually look like Flintheart, and instead just jump to the inevitable concluding shootout where someone gets killed? And by “someone” I of course mean Slim Skinner.

    JP: That last panel is an ad for Captain Morgan rum, right?

    GT: “We’ve won four of of five, Terry. You know why?”
    “For the same reason that you have one arm out of two – you lost one!!! HAW HAW HAW”
    “God, I wish I could still punch people without losing my balance.”

  141. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    November 13th, 2012 at 5:17 pm [Reply]

    So far, I’m finding Walt’s appearance in Tracy kind of amusing, and an in-kind payback for Gasoline Alley’s “Dick Tracy” storyline that celebrated the detective’s anniversary a few years back — and at the time, Tracy hadn’t looked that good in years.

  142. demoncat
    November 13th, 2012 at 5:34 pm [Reply]

    mw . i want us to be more then friends and thus it begins dawn now will soon be trying to come up with ways to avoid jim or ask mary to finaly step in and add jim to her body count in the end. can one say restraining order soon filed.

  143. Jeff Soesbe
    November 13th, 2012 at 6:20 pm [Reply]

    In a Ginger-June chest-off, *everybody* wins.

    - yeff

  144. MWDG
    November 13th, 2012 at 6:35 pm [Reply]


    in answer to poster “karymn #96… Jim believes that Dawn’s blood serves as the basis for “incredibly powerful, yet soft to your hands,” Dawn dishwashing liquid.

    Forgive me for saying this but, Dawn has asked for this! She knew that Jim had some sort of freaky side… apparently this got her “engine running!” Enjoy the ride girlfriend… apparently our one-armed Don Juan is Santa Royale’s own General Petreaus!

  145. SideshowJon
    November 13th, 2012 at 6:56 pm [Reply]

    Props fo’ Gangsta Jeffy!

  146. Alison
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:01 pm [Reply]

    “Mary Worth”: WTF is up with Dawn’s eyes in that first panel? Or any panel on any given day, really. Half the time Dawn looks cross-eyed and the other half the time she looks wall-eyed. Go to a doctor, Dawn. (But before you do that, push that straw right up Creeper Jim’s nose, and then run. Lordy, what a jerk.)

    “Rex Morgan”: “What you and Rex did”? Okay, Rex saved some old person, I get it, but what, exactly, did June do? Oh, I forgot, this is “Rex Morgan” and therefore all the main characters constantly get praised and receive expensive gifts just for being alive. That woman probably has a new car outside to give to June just for the hell of it.

    “Luann”: Yet another hopeless, pointless relationship between two people who don’t even seem to like each other*. And as usual, all the characters in the strip will encourage this crap, instead of doing what anyone in real life would do, which is to point out that the “relationship” is obviously going nowhere.

    *See also, Quill and Luann; Toni and Brad; Knute and Crystal.

  147. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:03 pm [Reply]

    @hogenmogen (#119): Being cock-blocked by Spidey would have to be a new low for—well, for just about anyone.

  148. tallyHO
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:15 pm [Reply]

    I get it now.

    Snuffy Smif’s Second panels are like that show Laugh-in where they would crack a joke, crack themselves up, say something like So Kick It To Me or Ubbit Yer Bippples and the music would play, people would laugh and they would go onto the next joke.

    With Snuffy and the gang, if there is any music it is Jughaid’s Jug Band (hopefully featuring Guest Jugger, Jughead from Archie Comics). Not that I have any proof of this supposition.

  149. tallyHO
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:23 pm [Reply]

    Slylock Fox
    That dog is an ass. An ass with opposable thumbs, but still an ass.

    Mark Trail
    Andy Dog could swallow young Jonny Quest whole much quicker than he could fetch a frisbee or pour a Whiskey from his neck keg.

    Why the way Andy’s tongue is hanging, he’s slowly but surely applying excess Salivant to serve as a substitute for a spoonful of sugar.

  150. Illustrator Steve
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:37 pm [Reply]

    MT – “I think my son is becoming attached to your dog, Mister Trail!”
    “By golly, you are RIGHT! THIS is serious! In order for them to be surgically separated we must get them to a hospital or veterinarian in Miami, IMMEDIATELY …QUICK, Do you know where the keys to Otto’s plane are?”

  151. The Ridger
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:37 pm [Reply]

    MT: Has Andy licked all the color out of that child’s hair? Is his saliva acidic, or merely bleachy?

  152. tallyHO
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:41 pm [Reply]

    @hogenmogen (#110):

    An Ode to Kool-Aid Man?

  153. tallyHO
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:45 pm [Reply]

    It is probably safe to presume that Professor O. Yeah instructs the younguns at Gangster and Prankster Tech. (it is close to UNLV)

  154. Liam
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:48 pm [Reply]

    A3G-Greg, when you are stoned you shouldn’t buy unknown yellow food stuff in generic shaped containers.

  155. tallyHO
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:48 pm [Reply]

    The end is nigh:

    Pluggers are all around the world!

  156. Liam
    November 13th, 2012 at 7:53 pm [Reply]

    MW-Dawn, I feel so close to you that I never want you to leave me. I want to wear your skin like a suit.

    MT-”Don’t let our kidnapping of you and keeping hostage for millions of dollars negatively affect our relationship.”

  157. Poteet
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:17 pm [Reply]

  158. Poteet
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:21 pm [Reply]

    MW — Jim obviously learned that hairdo from Mary, but I’d still like to know how she achieves it.

  159. Poteet
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:21 pm [Reply]

    9CL — I actually like this strip. What a weird day it’s been.

  160. toxic
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:33 pm [Reply]

    Sometimes I feel like the artist thinks Dawn is like the Pale Man from Pan’s Labryinth, but she has decided to attempt to join human society by waking up every day and using mascara to paint two crude eyes on her empty face.

    That or the artist is fucking terrible and shouldn’t be allowed to work professionally without taking remedial high school art. One of the two.

  161. Poteet
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:52 pm [Reply]

    S-M — I looked up Kraven in Wiki and it says he can “take down large dangerous animals with his bare hands.” I figure that means the large dangerous animals take one look at his costume and collapse with the giggles.

  162. Chaze
    November 13th, 2012 at 8:58 pm [Reply]

    @Marc (#136):

    Me and Boog are in hiding, along with my buddy, Sheldon.

  163. Chaze
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:08 pm [Reply]

    Honestly, has ANYONE ever seen a St Bernard chase a frisbee? Not unless Otto’s island holds Ponce DeLeon’s fountain of youth.

  164. Droopy Says
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:10 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#84): That snake-riding rodeo squirrel looks like something from “Oddities:”

    For some reason the show had an episode where two of its stars entered a taxidermy contest. The winner mounted a bandolier-wearing monkey atop a coyote. There was applause at the end. Maybe next year they can have Avery stuffed and mounted atop Old Hardy.

  165. Cloudbuster
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:29 pm [Reply]

    @toxic (#160): Joe Giella was probably a good artist, once. But he’s an octogenarian now. Like fellow octogenarian Frank Bolle of A3G fame, he’s on the comic strip artist’s “Legacy Strip Retirement Plan” (LSRP). Basically, when you’re an elder statesman on the funny pages, they give you a tired old legacy strip and let you keep at it as long as you can credibly claim to be pasting some clip art in some boxes.

    In Bolle’s case, I’ve actually seen recent work of his and outside of A3G it seems, strangely, that he can still actually draw. He’s just phoning A3G in.

    Giella was an inker most of his career, which isn’t terribly prestigious, and I haven’t seen any independent early work, but I’m giving him the benefit of the doubt.

  166. Cloudbuster
    November 13th, 2012 at 9:41 pm [Reply]

    Three of my goats posed today for a portrait of the Apartment 3-G girls as interpreted by the caprine crowd. From left, Margo, Lu Ann and Tommie. (Margo is “finger-quoting” with her ears!)

  167. Comcis Fan
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:09 pm [Reply]

    MW: Heh. Is that your Sunny D or are you … really, really happy to see me?

  168. Der Kömmëntätör, Herr Schnärkïnätör
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:28 pm [Reply]

    BB – That’s clearing a guy wearing some sort of animal costume complete with a head that morphs ala Rusty!

  169. Poteet
    November 13th, 2012 at 10:45 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#166): In your version, Margo looks nicer, Lu Ann looks smarter, and Tommie looks more interesting. The background does look a lot like the soothing bland A3G version of NYC, however.

  170. Archivalist
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:03 pm [Reply]

    MT — Mark’s new lady friend obviously has a thing for Our Bland Hero. Which means her story ends in a shallow grave dug by Kelly Welly.

    RMMD — Uh oh, June’s Spidey-Sense is going off, as she struggles against the pull of the soulless black pits where Ginger’s eyes should be.

  171. Der Kömmëntätör, Herr Schnärkïnätör
    November 13th, 2012 at 11:25 pm [Reply]

    @Der Kömmëntätör, Herr Schnärkïnätör (#168):

    Let’s try that again….

    BB – That’s clearly a guy wearing some sort of animal costume complete with a head that morphs ala Rusty!

    That is all….

  172. greghousesgf
    November 14th, 2012 at 11:44 am [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#148): well, Jughead (as opposed to Jughaid) already plays drums.

  173. Charly
    November 14th, 2012 at 6:05 pm [Reply]

    RMMD: Ginger resembles Paula Broadwell. Glad she’s built a new life for herself out in California.

    MT: I didn’t know the lost colonists of Roanoke ended up in the Caribbean.

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