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It’s morning in the comics

Shoe, 2/1/10

Say what you will about Funky Winkerbean, but at least it’s totally upfront with its non-stop cavalcade of misery. Some strips hide a core of intense gloom that occasionally peeks out from underneath the cheery front end of a gag-a-day strip. Take today’s Shoe, for instance. The Perfesser thought-balloons that “mama said there’d be days like this” as his morning alarm goes off. In other words, he’s already written the day off as terrible in his first few seconds of wakefulness. “Oh, look, I didn’t die painlessly in my sleep. Yep, it looks like it’s gonna be one of those days!

It’s also possible that the alarm has been going off for hours now, and the Perfesser is simply unable to move close enough to the clock to turn it off, due to some combination of obesity and decrepitude.

Gil Thorp, 2/1/10

Like many an angry, aimless dropout of his generation, Steve Luhm uses sarcasm to get in little digs at his elders that they’re too irony-deficient to catch. “My dad taught me there’s honor in any job if you work at hard at it … even coaching! And you know what’s a good sign that someone’s a hard worker? When they just hand off part of their workload to some other random person at the first opportunity! Anyway, I’ll be sure to thank my dad for that pearl of wisdom.”

Judge Parker, 2/1/10

Speaking of sarcasm, the Judge Parker narration box’s is particularly transparent today. At breakfast, Sam is still talking about Neddy’s live-in boyfriend! Still! The guy just will not shut up about it! Come on, dude, move on into the 21st century with the rest of us, OK?

Curtis, 2/1/10

I admit to being charmed by the enormous unblinking eye on Michelle’s t-shirt today. Curtis’s romantic ardor must be intense indeed, as it would instill a major case of the heebie-jeebies in the soul of a lesser suitor.

Luann, 2/1/10

Wait, they wish they had more time together? Every time we see them in this God-damned strip, they’re endless hashing out the terms of their perfectly gross relationship. Admittedly, each panel featuring Brand and/or Toni is one that doesn’t feature Luann and/or Gunther, but one shouldn’t have to settle for the lesser evil. Why not just retool the strip around Knute, Puddles the dog, Shannon, and Mr. Fogarty, and do everyone a favor?

Mary Worth, 2/1/10

Dear young people everywhere: do not ask either of your parents why he or she cannot forget a past lover unless you want to hear things about his or her past sexytimes that will shake you to your core. Fortunately, Wilbur is such a negative nelly that he goes straight to the arguments while meaningfully adjusting his glasses, though this may only presage tomorrow’s vivid recounting of the mind-blowing post-argument make-up sex. The description will blow Dawn’s socks off, assuming that purple bands of gauze wrapped around the middle of one’s feet can be said to constitute “socks.”

158 responses to “It’s morning in the comics”

  1. zenvelo
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:01 pm [Reply]

    Th perfesser’s hangover is so bad, he knows the terror of the alarm will be the best part of his day until he gets a couple of double gins down his gullet.

  2. zenvelo
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:06 pm [Reply]

    Wilbur is reminiscing about the only woman who ever let him be a true sub.

  3. One-eyed Wolfdog
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:06 pm [Reply]

    Fun fact: At that exact moment, Gunther was also wearing a pair of bouncy pom-poms and prancing around on a toy horsey. We are extremely fortunate that Evans opted to focus the camera elsewhere today.

  4. littlestevie
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:07 pm [Reply]

    So Jules is “well fixed” hmmm, maybe thats why Neddy moved in with him.

  5. AndyL
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:08 pm [Reply]

    I think Dawn is letting the conversation drift away from the fact that this mystery son is totally dodging a paternity test.

    I’m not convinced that the mystery son is actually a con-man though. Perhaps after meeting Wilbur he’s not thrilled about the idea of having his blood relationship with this man scientifically confirmed beyond any possibility of doubt.

  6. Patrick
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:12 pm [Reply]

    By the time Wilbur is done reminiscing about his past love life and going into excrutiating detail about every single thing about Kurt’s mother, any nefarious plan of Kurt’s will be foiled, since everybody in Mary Worth will be dead of old age.

  7. McManx
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:13 pm [Reply]

    Mary Worth — Dawn has nothing to lose in pursuing info on Wilbur’s past love life. It’s clear from her having drawn up into a fetal position that Wilbur is making her watch internet porn with him. And since he is adjusting his glasses, this site must be a doozy.

    Luann — It’s the “Finish Brad’s Sentence” Contest. What is Brad about to say now: “Wouldn’t it be nice if we could…”
    – “… actually spend some time together just the two of us?”
    – “… play fire fighters in my bedroom and you get to handle my hose?”
    – “… discover if, unlike other comic characters, we have nipples and genitals?”
    – “… set some 4 alarm fires which would require both our units to be called?”

    Curtis — Michelle’s hacking blobs on Curtis in panel 3. I guess this week’s Curtis deals with flu season in the hood.

  8. The Eric
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:14 pm [Reply]

    Blondie: Dagwood must be shocked by the pain in the last panel as the barber cuts off his feelers.

  9. commodorejohn
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:16 pm [Reply]

    Oh lord, I hadn’t even noticed Dawn’s foot…wrap…footlet? thingies. I am completely baffled by them; as near as I can figure, Giella started drawing sandals on her feet, realized that it would be a little odd to wear sandals on the couch, and forgot to erase the lines he’d drawn. They offer none of the qualities for which socks are renowned, they don’t serve to hold anything in place, and they look stupid. In other words, they’re pretty much the quintessential Mary Worth item of clothing, and I dearly hope they will be featured in the Mary Worth Cafepress store in the near future.

  10. Mars
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:20 pm [Reply]

    Josh, do you know for a fact Sam and Abbey cohabitated in the 90’s or were you just saying that yesterday?

    I didn’t think papers allowed that. I figured Lynn Johnston had to have Mike and Deanna secretly married before they moved in together because she’d face massive cancellations otherwise.

  11. Dante
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

    The comics today are reminding me of some of my favorite demotivators.

    Shoe: CHALLENGES – I expected times like this – but I never thought they’d be so bad, so long, and so frequent.

    Gil Thorp: POTENTIAL – Not everyone gets to be an astronaut when they grow up.
    (Works better with the picture of fast food fries.)

    Mary Worth: DYSFUNCTION – The only consistent feature in all of your dissatisfying relationships is you. (I’m looking at you, Wilbur)

  12. Digger
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:30 pm [Reply]

    Luann: What game is Shannon playing in the background of panel one? Enraged Alien Rides A Stickhorse?

  13. Naked Bunny with a Whip
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:31 pm [Reply]

    I’m going to give the Perfesser the benefit of the doubt and assume that this is just the first day his newspaper will be published entirely in tweet form.

  14. trey le parc
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:32 pm [Reply]

    JP: If that lampshade in the first panel and the stained glass panel in the second are any indication, Abby and Sam are having breakfast at Ye Olde Rathskeller.

  15. Josh
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:32 pm [Reply]

    @Mars (#10): While I am a relatively recent convert to JP reading, having only picked i up in late 2004 (about a month ago in strip time), others who are longer-term readers have told me that Sam and Abbey’s nuptuals are a fairly recent development. In fact, the impetus may have been the discovery of homeless urchins Neddy and Sophie and their subsequent adoption, though I could be off-base on that. They may have been somewhat coy about the living together angle, though? Perhaps a longer-term reader can enlighten.

    Though I admittedly can’t think of any examples off the top of my head, I’m pretty sure the world of comics is ready for cohabitation without benefit of clergy. The whole Michael-Deanna weirdness was I think more about Lynn J.’s moral code than the syndicates. But I could be wrong.


  16. gnome de blog
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:36 pm [Reply]

    Having discovered the mooching prospects chez Weston are minimal at best, Kurt should simply pack up in the middle of the night and leave. For Dawn, it would be the equivalent of winning a war by declaring victory and going home, and I’m curious what Dawn triumphant might look like. For Wilbur, the angst over the loss of his putative son would keep him in misery and “Ask Wendy” columns for decades.

  17. Uncle Ritzy Fritz
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:37 pm [Reply]

    Evidently Moy and/or Giella skipped the “Drawing Realistic Human Feet” course offering at Cartoonist College. Along with Mort Walker.

  18. gnome de blog
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:41 pm [Reply]

    Sam and Abbey didn’t exactly co-habit, but he probably spent more time at Spencer Farms than his law office. I don’t think they ever showed him having breakfast in the same clothes he wore last night though (thank you, Fashion Police, for pointing that out).

  19. TheCasey
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:43 pm [Reply]

    @Josh (#15) – Are Popeye and Olive Oyl actually married? And Norm & Bridget from My Cage aren’t married.

    Curtis – When did Michelle become an agent of Mordor?

  20. gnome de blog
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:47 pm [Reply]

    Speaking of co-habitation, Toni invited Brad to move in with her when TJ burned the house down but uber-mama DeGroot firmly vetoed the idea.

    Brad inviting Toni to move in (defying Momzilla) are her accepting provided TJ moves out would be a good story arc. Never happen, though.

  21. One-eyed Wolfdog
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:50 pm [Reply]

    Dawn, who had been reading up on elementary topology and finding it far more engaging than ongoing tales of her father’s errant penis, finally grew unspeakably frustrated with so-called “tube socks” that were clearly not tubes, but discs, and — woman of lilac and action that she is — she took a pair of scissors and she did what needed to be done. She later thought to herself that Abby might have saved everyone a great deal of trouble by doing the same thing a few decades earlier.

  22. gnome de blog
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:50 pm [Reply]

    Speaking of Toni (please forgive the serial posts), Brad should be about 20. If Shannon is Toni’s daughter, either she’s several years older than Brad or she had a kid when she was about 15. Either is possible. I vote for Toni being older (like 25), as it would partially explain her reluctance to get involved with him.

  23. Alter S. Reiss
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:54 pm [Reply]

    “The truth is Abby and I had a stormy relationship. . . though loved each other, we had our share of arguments!”

    Though loved each other?

  24. DownwithOPP
    February 1st, 2010 at 3:59 pm [Reply]

    So outraged is Michelle over Curtis’ suggestion that her family’s bankruptcy would be “good news” that the very mention of it has somehow caused her to begin changing from female to male. With her long t-shirt mercifully preventing the strip’s already fragile readership from witnessing the resulting transformation of her genetalia, her disturbingly sinister mustache in the third panel is the first outward manifestation of her metamorphisis. Either that or she just really likes Hitler.

  25. matt w
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:02 pm [Reply]

    Josh @ 15: Don’t Norm and Bridget live together in My Cage? I remember that Bridget had a roommate when they were broken up, but they seem to spend all their time together in Norm’s apartment otherwise.

  26. NoVan
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:03 pm [Reply]

    “His shoe factory is in our attic”? What is this, Windtalkers?

  27. Perky Bird
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:11 pm [Reply]

    I thought Sam was saying Abby was a very healthy young woman, as in “with certain womanly needs.” Which is why the “well-fixed” comment struck me as odd. Did it mean Jules was well-hung? That he had an insatiable sexual appetite? Or that he was had a vasectomy, so the two of them could go at it like bunnies and not have to worry?

  28. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:13 pm [Reply]

    MW: Is it possible that Dawn is caught up in a super-heroine fantasy just as some of us are? Perhaps this ill-conceived outfit represents her vision of what Genetica, Enforcer of DNA Testing would wear.

    As for the …. foot things, maybe she can’t find shoes that fit those shriveled, misshapen appendages. (And good lord, her hand is larger than her feet; if she is a super-heroine, she’s one of those mutant varieties.)

  29. BigTed
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:14 pm [Reply]

    So the Perfesser thinks a dropped alarm clock is something to complain about? When his mama talked about “days like this,” she meant the ones she spent doing nothing but chewing up worms and spitting them into his mouth.

  30. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:14 pm [Reply]

    @Perky Bird (#27): As a dog owner, I can only read “fixed” one way—and that way would ensure that Neddy and Jules won’t be needing to hide any babies in their French attic.

  31. Bitter Scribe
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:18 pm [Reply]

    The Chicago Tribune today announced plans to alter the comics pages. This was occasioned by their imminent decision to narrow down their page size next week. Since the comics are practically illegible now, they have to get rid of some.

    In fact, they created what amounts to an interesting three-tiered system: comics they’re ditching, comics that are staying the same size, and comics that are getting 25% bigger. Here is the list, along with my comments:

    Get Fuzzy (good. Malapropisms just aren’t funny. Not in Family Circus, and not here)
    Lio (too bad. I considered this one of the better new ones. Interesting concept, fairly well executed)
    Raising Hector (good. Putting mustaches and Hispanic names on tired old family humor doesn’t make it funny)
    Scary Gary (see Lio)
    Sylvia (good. Rubber-stamp art with unfunny cat jokes and tiresome liberal cliches—and I’m a liberal myself!)
    Watch Your Head (good. It has spiffy artwork but nonexistent jokes)

    Brenda Starr (meh)
    Brewster Rockit: Space Guy! (glad they’re keeping this one)
    Broom-Hilda (hasn’t been funny in years—was it ever?)
    Dick Tracy (the premier so-bad-it’s-good comic, especially in the all-Locher era)
    Mutts (the Hallmark card of comics, but not unenjoyable)
    Sherman’s Lagoon (bitchy-girlfriend/wife jokes don’t get any funnier underwater)

    Baby Blues (the only family-humor strip I really like)
    Blondie (DIE already!)
    Cathy (Aaaaaaack!)
    Classic Peanuts (OK, but how long is this going to go on?)
    Dilbert (yay!)
    Doonesbury (yay, and he can really use the space)
    For Better or for Worse (nothing left to say about this one)
    Frazz (not bad, but not in my top tier)
    Hagar the Horrible (ugh, ugh, ugh!)
    Mr. Boffo (dedicated to simple gags, but they’re good ones)
    Prickly City (this wouldn’t be funny even if I agreed with its politics)
    Shoe (another zombie strip that deserves snuffing)
    Zits (OK by me)

    What does the CC community think?

    (Cross-posted from last thread. Sorry, hope that’s not obnoxious, but I’m so curious as to what true comics connoisseurs think about the decisions by a major, albeit bankrupt, newspaper.)

  32. AJ
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:18 pm [Reply]

    This doesn’t apply to this post at all, but on a comics-related note, behold the first Bill Watterson interview in 20 years (probably):

    A funny, fascinating read.

  33. Farley's Revenge
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:27 pm [Reply]

    MW: Dawn, in her own flashback, is wearing legwarmers. Teeny-tiny legwarmers that barely cover her instep. Why? Who knows? Who cares? I know I don’t.

    I note that Wilbur appears to have moved his computer from the closet where it had been located to the living room where Dawn can watch him do whatever it is he does. I suspect this has been done to make it easier for her to fetch his sandwiches for him.

    Oh, and the line “Mama told me there’d be days like this” is a song lyric from Aerosmith’s “Take Me to the Other Side”. Does this mean that bird-guy is an Aerosmith fan?

  34. Foolkiller
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:29 pm [Reply]

    Who is this Morelli, the butcher of Dagwood’s wings?

  35. Farley's Revenge
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:30 pm [Reply]

    @gnome de blog (#22): Shannon was introduced as Toni’s niece. Toni seems to get stuck babysitting the rugrat on a fairly regular basis, such as whenever the cartoonist thinks it’s entertaining. To me, Shannon is the jr version of Jar-Jar Binks in a strip filled with Jar-Jar Binks characters.

  36. Steve C.
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:30 pm [Reply]

    “My dad taught me there’s honor in any job if you work hard at it… even coaching! Or statutory rape! That’s a job, right? My dad always said it was, and that’s why Mom was only fifteen years older than me. Or did he just say it was hard work?”

  37. Steve S
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

    “My dad taught me there’s honor in any job if you work hard at it . . . except janitor. He said he’d kill himself if his son were a janitor, which is why I talk about him in the past tense.”

    Gil’s so callous and narcissistic that his response can still be “Make sure to thank him for me.”

  38. commodorejohn
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

    @matt w (#25): Bridget does have her own apartment, but seems to spend a very large amount of her free time at Norm’s (jokes have been made about the roommate she can’t remember because they never see each other.) However, implications have been made that they’re knockin’ boots on occasion, if I recall correctly.

  39. Baka Gaijin
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:35 pm [Reply]

    Mary Worth, unseen panel 4: Wilbur: “Our arguing. It almost doesn’t matter Abby had a pussy like an iron fist in a velvet glove.”*
    Dawn: POW! [sound of head asploding]

    Slylock Fox, answer: Slylock took the magnifying glass out of his pocket and focused it on the happy squirrel while Max held him down. Once he burst into flames, Slylock flung him out the window, where he up and down the trees, setting them afire. Even the slackest, most clueless fire marshall Mark Trail couldn’t miss the conflagration at the old Weiredly place.

    Cathy: Cathy, you ignorant slut. Irving’s trying to get you to get rid of that movable hoarder’s paradise you call a purse.

    * BLARGH! I completely grossed myself out.

  40. Chyron HR
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:35 pm [Reply]

    MW – “Abby and I had a stormy relationship, and I’m going to write all about it on”

    JP – “At breakfast, Sam continues to spout racist diatribes against cobbling elves!”

  41. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:37 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#39): I’m not sure that the guy who runs screaming from clowns has the right to give the rest of us an image to make us run from our computers screaming: “EEEEEEEEE! Scary pussy joke! EEEEEE!”

  42. GotFuzzy
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:38 pm [Reply]

    @Bitter Scribe (#31): This makes me ever so glad that I dumped the dead-tree Trib. No Get Fuzzy, Lio and Scary Gary and bigger Cathy, Re-FOOB, Hagar and Shoe would have made my head explode. Plus, the loss of the truly awful Raising Hector is not enough to make up for the continued appearance of Broom-Hilda.

    MW: I didn’t look too closely at this on the Chron site (I never try to look too closely at anything Wilbur-related), so I just assumed that Dawn was wearing flip-flops. And what’s up with her pants? Purple from the waist to the knees and then blue for the rest of the leg? Mr. Giella, would you please look at some human women and their manner of dress? Maybe you need to leave Long Island to do that (a preemptive apology to all L.I. Mudges!).

  43. Gary
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:40 pm [Reply]

    If Ned is as “well fixed” as my dog, Toby, then Jules, like our couch in the family room, can expect occasional and random dry humping as well.

  44. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:40 pm [Reply]

    @Farley’s Revenge (#33): Not only has Dawn wisely moved Wilbur’s computer to a more public place in the home, where she can keep an eye on him, but she’s going one step further.

  45. Foolkiller
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:41 pm [Reply]

    @33: More likely he is a Shirelle’s fan/rememberer. Mama said there’ll be days like this/There’ll be days like this Mama said/(Mama said, mama said)

  46. cj
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:43 pm [Reply]

    Yeah, I’m calling shenanigans here. No white guy just willingly becomes a janitor anymore. “Steve Luhm” (if that is in fact his name) must be enacting some nefarious plot.

    Sam Driver, PI:
    21st century? From the sound of it, Sam isn’t ready to accept living in the late ’60s! He went from an anti-hero willing to do what it takes to serve justice in a grey-and-black world, to a fix-it guy who used the legal system for evil, and now he’s simply an overbearing father! His character derailment is complete.

    “Everything. But I may be idealizing the past, Dawn.” Is Wilbur Weston actually engaging in self-reflection? The meaningful kind, I mean?
    In panel two, it becomes even more evident that Wilbur has old guy eyes painted on his glasses. Self-mockery? I think the old hog just became my favorite (read: only liked) MW character.

    But they already retooled it to the Brad and Toni Show! I know this may be an unpopular suggestion, but I think TJ should get his own spinoff. As disturbing as his smirk is, he’s still the only likable character that’s not Antonia Daytona, who lights a fire in our hearts. Oh, and Gunther can burn! Burn, you snotnosed dork! Just burn!

  47. Mollificent at work
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:43 pm [Reply]

    @Dante (#11): Boy, I can think of a few people I’d like to quote that “Dysfunction” line to.

  48. Motorposus
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:45 pm [Reply]

    MW: You know what I love about Dawn? That her pants are a different color below the knee. Or, possibly, that her lower body is stuffed inside the sofa while she clutches mannequin legs to her bosom…mannequin legs with tennis wristlets on their feet. Anyway, I love it!

  49. StoutHearted
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:45 pm [Reply]

    OK, I give up. What are those things on Dawn’s feet?

  50. Binder's Butter Beans
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:47 pm [Reply]

    “Decrepitude” is one of my favorite words! It doesn’t come up NEARLY often enough in normal conversation, and Josh, I’d like to thank you for using it today.

    Also: did anyone else laugh out loud at the phrase “Jules is well-fixed himself”? Or am I the only one immature enough to admit it?

  51. True Fable
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:47 pm [Reply]

    @Bitter Scribe (#31): Okay, here’s a Fable take on it:

    Get Fuzzy I would have raised hell a couple of years ago. Now I can’t even manage a good sound heck.
    Lio the FOOLS!
    Raising Hector Never heard of it.
    Scary Gary Never heard of it.
    Sylvia GOOD, this comic gives my eyes a headache.
    Watch Your Head Heard of it but never followed it.

    Brenda Starr Is this one of their few serial comics? Well, at least they’ve got a good one.
    Brewster Rockit: Space Guy! This is a riot of a strip; glad they are keeping it.
    Broom-Hilda Birdcage fodder.
    Dick Tracy Ahh, snarkable badness!
    Mutts usually sweet, sometimes painfully sweet.
    Sherman’s Lagoon I used to follow this but like chewing gum, it’s lost its flavor.

    Baby Blues It’s an okay strip but little-kids-doing-messy-things gags are on the Birdcage fodder list when they get too Poor Pitiful Parent-y.
    Blondie oh yay, let’s recycle 50-year-old gags because it’s a Legacy.
    Cathy Cathy. Must. Die.
    Classic Peanuts Dammit, KILL THIS COMIC ALREADY
    Dilbert I can name you three other office-centric comics that would be worlds better than this.
    Doonesbury Good. See kids, THIS is what a good long-running strip is like.
    For Better or for Worse NO NO NO This piece of SHIT needs to GO, even the birds won’t poop on it. Even the GOATS won’t have a nibble. Unsympathetic characters, dumb plotholes the size of a Buick, offensive anti-male, anti-working women, anti-kids, anti-NORMAL PEOPLE strip that appeals to God knows who – what kind of Polaroids is Lynn holding, that she’s still got this thing running? /rant
    eh, it’s okay. Not a great strip but it sure beats Certain Ones all to hell.
    Hagar the Horrible
    This strip reminds me of the Flintstones, and next to being compared to For Better or For Worse, that is a damning phrase in my book.
    Mr. Boffo
    Not familiar with this one.
    Prickly City I liked the recent Lizard Girl artwork, only because it didn’t look like the strip was drawn with a lump of charcoal by a spasmodic monkey with delirium tremors. Storyline? Meh. Political bashing, but at least it bashes both ways.
    Shoe The birds aim for this in particular in their birdcage.
    Just because I don’t like that lazy-assed entitled like shitheel Jeremy or his malleable sheep-dumb tinderbox of a mother, the rest of the cast is enjoyable and I like the artwork for the most part.

    There ya go.

  52. Hand J?b
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:52 pm [Reply]

    Wilbur’s chest hair certainly has a mind of it’s own from panel to panel.

  53. True Fable
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:52 pm [Reply]

    I imagine these are what Joe was shooting for: sandals comprised of a slab of plastic on the bottom and a strip of fabric or something going across the foot just enough so the toes can slide in and be exposed on the other side.

    Oh dear lord, I sound like a shoe designer! Hot damn, where’s Neddy?!?

  54. commodorejohn
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:53 pm [Reply]

    @True Fable (#51): Fable! Man, where ya been?

  55. Rusty
    February 1st, 2010 at 4:55 pm [Reply]

    Wilbur either has a near naked combover, or somebody took a few whacks at his skull with a hatchet.

  56. Edgy DC
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:00 pm [Reply]

    Last week’s Croc has moved us into a new sexual paradigm and in panel two of today’s Gil Thorpe Steve Luhm is buggering somebody while casually having a conversation over his shoulder with Gil.

    What the hell is wrong with people?

  57. Dr. Weird
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:00 pm [Reply]

    @StoutHearted (#49):

    The only thing I’ve seen like what Dawn has are bouncy ninja Mai Shiranui’s instep guards.

    I somehow doubt there’s going to be a Mary Worth fighting game… on the other hand, Mary would be a scarier final boss than M. Bison or Omega Rugal.

  58. True Fable
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:00 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#54):

    I’ve been working my ass off on writing books and doing my own comic, man. Let me tell you, I have worlds of respect for cartoonists who really care about what they are doing; this shit is not easy.

    I snark here every chance I get but most of the time I’m snarking my own strip in true ‘Mudgeonly fashion. It really does help to have studied the snarking here because I know what to try to avoid. TRY, that’s the key word here.

  59. Poteet
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:04 pm [Reply]

    MW — Did I miss the memo wherein it was decided that “…though loved each other, we had our share of arguments” was reasonable English?

  60. cheech wizard
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:08 pm [Reply]

    We can’t tell what Shannon is saying, but seeing as she appears to have the dog’s severed head on a pike, it’s probably some kind of ultimatum. “See this?! You wanna be next?! Now go get me some juice and cookies!!”

  61. James
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:09 pm [Reply]

    Wilbur’s mouth is closed while little Shannon’s there is open with nothing above it. Maybe some speech bubbles migrated

  62. gnome de blog
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:12 pm [Reply]

    Pastis is on to something here. Since Darby Conley obviously can’t draw women, he could “borrow” some from Barreto.

  63. finger quotin\\\\\\\' annie
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:14 pm [Reply]

    @Mars (#10): Ah, but don’t forget, Lizzie and her college boyfriend lived together until she dumped him because he was cheating on her. And didn’t she also live with (or at least visibly spend nights with) her native cop boyfriend? So, I guess the rule is, your unmarried characters can live together, as long as one of them ends up miserable for their dirty, dirty sins.

  64. gnome de blog
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:15 pm [Reply]

    @Farley’s Revenge (#35): There has been a lot of speculation around here that she is really Toni’s daughter. Maybe it’s wishful thinking. It makes for a better story, and I think it fits with the character.

  65. commodorejohn
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:16 pm [Reply]

    @True Fable (#58): Ah. How’s the comic effort coming? I recall you were working on that a while back.

  66. queek, Source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:17 pm [Reply]

    I seem to remember Ed Power mentioning that the syndicate wouldn’t let Norm & Bridget officially co-habitate in a non-married condition. And yes, they have made the “you’re always here anyways” jokes on several occasions. The roommates comment about thinking the apartment was haunted by an awesome ghost that payed half the rent was one of my favorite gags in the entire strip!

  67. Cranky
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:24 pm [Reply]

    How can you even look at her “socks”? Capri pants and two-toned hair and you’re concerned with “socks”? Damn, Josh, it’s like you’re not even a fashionable gay man.

  68. Pozzo
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:25 pm [Reply]

    Sam is “still” talking about Neddy’s live-in boyfriend the next morning, meaning either he and Abbey didn’t have sex the night before, or he talked about Neddy and her guy while he and Abbey were…damn! Now I’ve got a stiffie.

  69. tb4000
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:26 pm [Reply]

    Luann: Brad, shut up. Everyone knows whenever you attempt to showcase you have testicles, someone chimes in to metaphorically strip you of said testes. In this case, Shannon.

  70. mr 12 oz can
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:28 pm [Reply]

    @Bitter Scribe (#31): a paper ditching good stuff like scary gary and lio and keeping old moth balls like cathy and doonesbury thats sad . not as sad as long island newsday comic section thats why i read all my comics on line

  71. ratnerstar
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:30 pm [Reply]

    @NoVan (#26): I was wondering the same thing. I admit — well, “admit” is really the wrong word, more like “boast” — to not really following Judge Parker, so I thought maybe the kid literally has a shoe factory in Sam’s actual attic. Because the sexual euphemism option is simply too horrible to contemplate.

  72. mustang
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:31 pm [Reply]

    If you do a Google Images search for “heelless, ankleless, toeless socks”, you just get a picture of Dawn. That’s it … just Dawn on the couch at Charterstone with pictures of foliage behind her.

    And while we’re on the subject, someone explain that shirtpants thing she has on.

  73. True Fable
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:32 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#65):
    Not bad. It’s a daily plus Sunday now. I’m wrestling with the color aspect of Sundays; right now I’m using a primitive Paint program to color, and it’s eating my time like crazy. Greater Metropolitan Roopville only has a box of 8 basic crayons, y’know. I may go back to doing all black and white (and shades of gray.) I’m looking into other programs.

    It’s been fun though; my sons Galevav and Sweet snark the living HELL out of me at home.

    Don’t know if I’ll ever knock Lynn off the page though. Got to get syndicated for that and I don’t know that I’m ready to run with the Big Dogs.

  74. Dr. Weird
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:34 pm [Reply]

    I hadn’t noticed it at newspaper size, but Shannon’s stick horse looks like it has a REALLY tormented expression on its face.

  75. mojo
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:35 pm [Reply]

    Look! Wilbur made CNN! A nice picture of he and Abby, right before the breakup!

    (You can just tell Abby’s about to have those shocklines start radiating out of her face. Methinks she’s about to leave him because she’s a free spirit who likes to wear kooky hats. Plus, clearly she wants someone who’s more her intellectual equal.)

    As for cohabiting before marriage, am I the only fogey here who remembers the big Doonesbury brouhaha when Joanie first spent the night with Rick Redfern? The camera zoom over four panels to their bedroom window the next morning? People totally freaked out. Of course, I think that was sometime in the late seventies. Some of you probably weren’t even BORN yet… One of the compilation books with this strip in it was called “As the Girl Goes For Broke” which is what Joanie thought to herself when she first suggested she should spend the night with him.

  76. mr 12 oz can
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:38 pm [Reply]

    mary worth – well dawn moved the computer and shes wearing sweatbands on her feet of course purple . hot and bothered wilber must have a foot fetish because he took off the green sweater meanwhile kurt stuffs anything of value into the dufflebag .

  77. Josh
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:39 pm [Reply]

    @finger quotin’ annie (#63) sez: Ah, but don’t forget, Lizzie and her college boyfriend lived together until she dumped him because he was cheating on her.

    True, but they were in a larger group house, and there was a LUDICROUS plot development where, on the first day they all arrived at school for the year, it was revealed that Cheatin’ Eric was thinking that he and Liz would share a room while Liz assumed they’d have separate rooms. This was awful on a number of levels. Not only is it insanely unrealistic that this is something that, you know, wouldn’t be discussed in advance, but the ultimate outcome was separate rooms, which meant that another housemate (forget his name, shlubby guy who ended up dating Liz’s supposedly punk rock friend) ended up getting displaced and sleeping on the couch, which, are you kidding me? “Oh, sorry you have to spend your junior year of college without any personal space of your own, person I pretend is my friend, but it’s very important that the illusion of my chastity be preserved! Too bad I can’t do the basic math of figuring out the people-to-room ratio on this house, and too bad it’s too late for you to find other housing now!”


  78. Brian
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:46 pm [Reply]

    In the final panel of the Mary Worth, I have the horrible feeling that Wilbur is going to remove his glasses and his eyes will go with them… look, they’re a little askew already.

  79. little lulu
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:50 pm [Reply]

    Dawn clearly doesn’t need full socks, as she is only a TORSO who merely hugs her lower legs to her body as she floats horribly through the Charterstone community. Also:
    For when socks are too much!

  80. finger quotin' annie
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:54 pm [Reply]

    @finger quotin\\\\\\\’ annie (#63): @Josh (#77): Oh, Josh. That’s why we love having you around. I had certainly not remembered all of those circumstances! And you are right, that is ridiculously awful on so many levels.

  81. commodorejohn
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:57 pm [Reply]

    @True Fable (#73): Fun, fun! I know I’ve thought about trying my hand at that sort of thing before, but as much as one might look at Sylvia or Dinette Set and think “hell, if they’ll take THAT,” getting syndicated doesn’t seem to be nearly as easy as it ought to.

    As far as coloring goes, you really can’t beat Adobe Photoshop. Being able to keep your lineart on a separate layer makes things a billion times easier, and if you can afford a basic tablet, it gets even more convenient. Obviously, being famous commercial software, you’re not going to be able to afford it new unless you want to live off ramen and Shasta soda for a month, but you can probably pick up an older version (7 is quite nice) for cheap.

    @Josh (#77): Ah, yet another tale of the entire civilized world bending over backwards to lavish the Pattersons with everything they could possibly want. Was the air of derision for non-Patterfoobs part of the strip back then, too?

  82. James
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:58 pm [Reply]

    Also, just stare at Michelle’s head in the last panel (Or Curtis’ in the second) for a good amount of time. After a bit my brain stopped thinking of it as a comic and I grew concerned over the fact that their whole mouths are visible from the side

  83. Jamus The Bartender
    February 1st, 2010 at 5:59 pm [Reply]

    @mojo (#75): A seven thousand dollar sex robot. Damn. I don’t have anything to say to that.

  84. Baka Gaijin
    February 1st, 2010 at 6:10 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#41): Thinking is talking inside my head, typing is talking with my fingers. Sometimes I get them confused. Wilbur Weston’s everchanging eye color and facial features confuse me, too.

  85. Crankenstank
    February 1st, 2010 at 6:13 pm [Reply]

    I think the next dramatic twist we’re going to get in Luann is that Gunther will get the part of Chino, and will shoot Quill (playing Tony) at the end of the play having substituted a real gun for the stage gun. Hey, like Gunther, we can all hope for a happy ending, right?

  86. Crankenstank
    February 1st, 2010 at 6:15 pm [Reply]

    Oh, that is the actual color pattern of Dawn’s feet.

  87. bunivasal
    February 1st, 2010 at 6:20 pm [Reply]

    @Patrick (#6):

    Don’t be silly, Patrick! Mary Worth characters can never be granted respite for their demonaic matron, it’s we who will be long dead, wasted away before Mary Worth’s interminable narrative.

  88. Carly
    February 1st, 2010 at 6:28 pm [Reply]

    I think most of us actual human young people (or not so young people) know better than to ask our parents about their love lives. More proof that Dawn is a cyborg built by Wilbur. This can only end in tragedy when the cyborg is replaced by the living, breathing son and she goes on a murderous rampage through Tokyo.

    Man, that would be so much cooler than what’s actually going to happen.

  89. cheech wizard
    February 1st, 2010 at 6:28 pm [Reply]

    MW – “A stormy relationship”? Yeah, I guess that’s one way to describe when a dweeby guy has drunken sex with a gal who’s way out of his league, then won’t quit bugging her for weeks on end. No, Wilbur, what you had with Abby wasn’t a relationship, it was “history” – and what she had with you was likely a PPO, which is why you never heard from her again.

  90. bunivasal
    February 1st, 2010 at 6:31 pm [Reply]

    In Other News:

    Gil Thorpe:
    Gil: “Be sure to thank your dad for me. You know, one more job you can do for me, for no pay!”

    Mary Worth:
    Wilbur isn’t actually looking at his computer in these panels. From any other comic, I’d say he was looking into the past, setting up a flashback that should be here by sometime in July, but since it’s Mary Worth I’m convinced he’s actually peering out from the pages of the paper, checking on his remaining target audience.

    Judging by the angle that Shannon is holding that Stick Pony, the “fit” she’s having is that it’s jammed deep into her kidney.

  91. True Fable
    February 1st, 2010 at 6:34 pm [Reply]

    YEEEEHAAAW! I found the solution thanks to Galevav! Our GIMP program ought to be the answer.

    Kuller funneys, heer Ah kumm!

  92. NJP
    February 1st, 2010 at 6:53 pm [Reply]

    Just when I think I hate I can’t hate the characters in 9 Chickweed Lane any more than I already do, Gran is revealed as a Nazi sympathizer. Is this really supposed to tug on the heartstrings, McEldowney?

  93. gleeb
    February 1st, 2010 at 6:55 pm [Reply]

    Candor: I hear ya, Clyde.

    ‘bean: I smell Charles Whitman.

    Pluggers: …have inventive ways to make their drug dollar stretch.

    Rex: I’d like to think the nanny isn’t really as mean as June. I’d like to think that she just knows enough not to disagree, like a dog that’s been whipped too many times already.

  94. commodorejohn
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:00 pm [Reply]

    @NJP (#92): *head asplode*

    That’s it. Brooke McEldowney is just. Fucking. Insane.

  95. gnome de blog
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:00 pm [Reply]

    @cheech wizard (#89): Don’t forget: Abby was a townie, and still in high school. Wilbur was the first older boy she could catch. She dumped him fast when something better came along.

  96. Buck Ripsnort
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:00 pm [Reply]

    I just had this horrific flash of a Pluggers/Shoe crossover– “You’re a Plugger if you get ideas for your zombie comic from old bumper stickers.”

  97. Écureuil Écumant
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:03 pm [Reply]

    A3G: Our attic? The only way that flies is if they’re subsidizing every sou of Neddy’s Paris life. But in panel 1, Sam states she’s a “very wealthy young woman”. Sam, it sounds to me like “shoes in the attic” is Newspeak for “bats in the belfry”.

    MT: Dawn has had her feet tattooed with the Charterstone tribal pattern. She probably has a salmon-square tramp stamp too.

  98. Deon
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:07 pm [Reply]

    Today’s BC’ seems kind of familiar, but the joke is kind of generic so I’ll give it a pass.
    I dunno, this isn’t the first time I’ve noticed the same joke being used in a different strip.
    I dunno, if you’re a writer on three newspaper strips, is it okay to reuse a joke you wrote for one in another?
    Especially if you originally wrote the joke for a strip of your own creation that probably isn’t as well known as the other two strips you write for?
    I dunno, but I’m keeping an eye on you, John Hart Studios

  99. gnome de blog
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:10 pm [Reply]

    @gleeb (#93): This story is approaching Victorian melodrama. Cast out from her home and having no prospects, the poor young woman is forced to enter domestic service by her cruel cousin and equally cruel friend.

  100. Mooncattie
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:14 pm [Reply]

    MW – Perhaps Dawn should have tried “Dad, help me understand. And start by not talking like some moron in a Mary Worth comic.”

    BB – It would be history in the making if this developed into a week-long storyline in which Beetle and the Sarge set off to explore neighbouring comics in an unprecedented bid for self-awareness. Sadly, they’d probably only get as far as Hi and Lois before quickly retreating to the safety and comfort of Camp Swampy, and each other.

    GT – It’s not so much “coaching” as “bellowing”, is it?

    MT – “Yes Senator, things have changed. This modern world we live in. The weekend crowds in their high-speed motorboats. The fish, leaping in terror. Our declining sexuality…”

    FW and GA – What is this, Make Fun Of Veterans Week? Well, stop it.

  101. fnord3125
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:16 pm [Reply]

    re: curtis – Josh, are you suggesting it would be less creepy if the eye on Michelle’s shirt was blinking?

  102. Joe Blevins
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:24 pm [Reply]

    LUANN: I’m intrigued by the specifics of Shannon’s little dress-up game which involves deely boppers and a hobby horse. Is she imagining herself as one of a race of super-evolved insectoid equestrians? If so, I fully endorse your plan to make Shannon a main character rather than a mere supporting player because that is an awesome fantasy.

    MW: “I may be idealizing the past.” I’m pretty sure you are, Wilbur. Otherwise why would you be clinging pathetically to your LONG GONE days as a hirsute youngster with that dreadful Alpine rope toss you call a combover?

  103. queek, Source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:26 pm [Reply]

    @Deon (#98): recipe for the perfect dry martini: two oz gin, and a sniff of the vermouth bottle-cap.

  104. queek, Source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:36 pm [Reply]

    Roughly 38 days after today’s Lio.

  105. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:38 pm [Reply]

    @queek, Source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#103): But the perfect summertime martini: Hendrick’s gin, a bit of vermouth, muddled cucumber in the shaker, and a couple slices of cucumber in the glass. Mmmmmm…..

  106. BruceJ
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:48 pm [Reply]

    Curtis is really not well-read in the classics, else he’d clearly recognize Michelle’s T-shirt proclaiming her to be one of the Orcs of the Lidless Eye, a follower of Sauron.

  107. gnome de blog
    February 1st, 2010 at 7:58 pm [Reply]

    @queek, Source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#103):

    Two ounces of gin and face Italy.

  108. Roger
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:02 pm [Reply]

    Yes, once again, it’s…

    Word Bubble Swap Theatre!

    I could take or leave the swapped Judge Parker, but I rather enjoy the swapped Gil Thorp. The last panel displays my new favourite sports heckle.

  109. Écureuil Écumant
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:06 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#105):

    Not quite sure why, but when I read those words “muddled cucumber” I can’t help seeing a vegetable with a pathetic combover and look of cluelessness…

  110. Red Greenback
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:12 pm [Reply]

    @Roger (#108): Excellent! “His shoe factory is in our attic!” almost sounds like something the late, great Chick Hearn would have said.

  111. Ribinin
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:12 pm [Reply]

    @True Fable (#73): Photoshop is good, but if you are on a budget, look at Gimp.

  112. queek, Source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:13 pm [Reply]

    @gnome de blog (#107): ROFL!

    “According to legend, Sir Winston Churchill made martinis by pouring gin into a pitcher while glancing briefly at a bottle of vermouth across the room. (Martini Muse adds to this legend by having Churchill glance toward France as he passes the bottle of vermouth over the gin-filled martini glass.)”

    personally, I loathe gin with a passion, but booze anecdotes are always fun.

  113. Ribinin
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:14 pm [Reply]

    @Crankenstank (#86): I was thinking that too. Cheap dye on the shoes she wore to clean the fish.

  114. Jamus The Bartender
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:15 pm [Reply]

    9CL: “….I would like to thank the Academy….I would like to thank Hitler…”

  115. Jamus The Bartender
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:17 pm [Reply]

    Spider Man: You know what this means, right? All those cute little stories I like to do? With Dick Tracy drinking and Cassandra doing everything else? This means the characters of the Marvel Universe at large are all mine. MINE!! Hot damn, this must be how the Disney Corporation felt !!

  116. Jamus The Bartender
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:19 pm [Reply]

    Slylock: Okay. Real question here is, where are Max Mouse and Sammy Squirrel keeping their poker winnings?

  117. Jamus The Bartender
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:21 pm [Reply]

    JP: I’m getting the feeling that Sam Driver is taking issue with Jules Of Paree dipping into Neddy’s Golden Treasure. Both of them.

  118. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:22 pm [Reply]

    @Écureuil Écumant (#109): Gah! Please don’t spoil my favorite summer drink by making me think of Wilbur Weston being anywhere near my mouth!

  119. Jamus The Bartender
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:23 pm [Reply]

    Blondie: What…have….you….DONE??

  120. UncleJeff
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:47 pm [Reply]

    @Roger (#108): Brilliant! Gil’s expression when he talks about the rich young woman works for me!

  121. Johnny Knuckles
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:48 pm [Reply]

    MW: Dawn is positioned to immediately curl up tight into the fetal position and tip over on the sofa when she learns from Daddy McCombover that “stormy relationship” means “nonconsensual experiments in multiplexed paraphilia, sexual asphyxia, urolagnia, and zoophilia.”

    That’s why actually making an actual human baby is such a shock to him.

  122. gnome de blog
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:55 pm [Reply]

    Tommie should have left Margo a note!? She couldn’t send a text message? No wonder Tommie’s such a drudge. She started out hip and fab in 1962 and went backwards. In another couple of years she’ll be living in Lost Forest with a pet beaver and poaching alligators. Shopping the Cherry Trail collection should improve her wardrobe though.

  123. Poteet
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:56 pm [Reply]

    JP — Now I keep remembering the shoe-making in TALE OF TWO CITIES and the shoe-making in THE LEGACY, later turned into A TOWN LIKE ALICE, and the shoe-making in “The Elves and the Shoemaker”…this can’t be healthy.

  124. Muffaroo
    February 1st, 2010 at 8:59 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#y119): When I took logic in college, we were shown a list of mnemonics for various valid (and invalid) syllogisms. The vowels represented the type of statements. Thus, Barbara was A A A (All X are Y. All Y are Z. Therefore, all X are Z.). Fesapo was a syllogism of E A O form, that is a syllogistic argument in the fourth figure, in which there is one universal negative and one universal affirmative premise and a particular negative conclusion. Fesapo, we are told, is an invalid syllogism. But gosh darnit, we still love him, because he’s Fesapo, dammit!

    @True Fable (#51): For me, Peanuts is still in the top five every day for simply being entertaining on its own terms. The Beatles of the comic strip page.
    ps: Doonesbury’s still great too. The Neil Young of the strips: getting older, but still inspired and with awesome integrity.

    @commodorejohn (#81): Oh yeah, I forgot to mention the tablet to Fable. Hey, TF! Under a hundred bucks buys all the tablet you need, and maybe you can score a used one cheaper (but be careful).

  125. Poteet
    February 1st, 2010 at 9:02 pm [Reply]

    9CL — So people in the 9CLiverse are breathlessly waiting for the latest chapter in Gran’s long saga of how she was willing to play along with the Nazis as long as one of them was a good kisser who knew how to sing. This is not going to land her a chapter in the next book about The Greatest Generation.

  126. Perky Bird
    February 1st, 2010 at 9:02 pm [Reply]

    “Though loved each other…” :Thinking of all the raw, primal love he and Abby shared made Wilbur briefly forget how to use “civilized” word structures, such as pronouns.

  127. KarMann
    February 1st, 2010 at 9:12 pm [Reply]

    For those intrigued by Blondie‘s giant leap, it might be worth being reminded of the setup, two weeks ago.

    @Muffaroo (#124): Ah, I noticed the vowels there, but then I was trying to figure some meaning for the consonants, and got nowhere after that.

    Much like the Trib being discussed, the Tucson paper here went to narrow format and reduced comics today. Three casualties: Mother Goose & Grim, Pardon My Planet, and… Funky Winkerbean!! Bye-bye, Cancerville! (Except they say the Sundays won’t change, which would mean we’d still have Groovy Blinkerlegume there.)

  128. DaveyK
    February 1st, 2010 at 9:13 pm [Reply]

    Two panels and just 56 words in today’s Mary Worth and yet Wilbur’s last sentence is still missing a word. By contrast each of the 3 wispy hairs on his forehead are meticulously rendered in each panel. The priorities at Mary Worth Quality Control are a little hard to fathom.

  129. DumbBlone
    February 1st, 2010 at 9:29 pm [Reply]

    Actual conversation between husband and self after reading today’s Mary Worth:
    Me: What are those things on her feet?
    Husband: I think those are supposed to be sandals.
    Me: Shouldn’t sandals have soles?
    Husband: Her sandals have no souls. Just like the rest of the characters in Mary Worth.

  130. yorn
    February 1st, 2010 at 9:34 pm [Reply]

    I just wanna know what kind of “fit” from Shannon involves a recently decapitated furry and little googly antennae.

  131. tb4000
    February 1st, 2010 at 9:35 pm [Reply]

    Blondie: United Features Syndicate is going to fuck up the Young estate for that little bit of copyright ruination.

  132. cheech wizard
    February 1st, 2010 at 9:42 pm [Reply]

    @gnome de blog (#95): Abby was a townie? That explains a lot. Back in the 40s, you never used condoms on the local girls. You only resorted to them for women of your own class whose fathers could make your professional life a living hell.

  133. Zla'od
    February 1st, 2010 at 9:45 pm [Reply]

    Luann: Say “Sitting Shannon” three times fast.

  134. cheech wizard
    February 1st, 2010 at 9:48 pm [Reply]

    9CL – Then didn’t shoot her back then, but what’s the statute of limitations on treason? I mean, can we still hope? This is one time when I really wish our government was based on religious fundamentalism, so we could visit the iniquities of the parent out to the third generation.

  135. anty a
    February 1st, 2010 at 9:54 pm [Reply]

    Josh, just wanted to put in a word of appreciation…I rarely fail to laugh out loud when I read your commentary. Thanks!

  136. Revenge of Chesnut
    February 1st, 2010 at 10:04 pm [Reply]

    Perhaps Michelle’s shirt is a variation on a Turkish nazar in an (unsuccessful) attempt to ward off Curtis’ “evil eye” of romantic intentions. Or maybe I am just a nerd who likes to look shit up on Wikipedia and then tell people about it.

  137. Tintin LaChance
    February 1st, 2010 at 10:24 pm [Reply]

    Shoe has sunk so low as to start cribbing lines from the extra verses of the Friends theme. I have to admit, I’m a little ashamed for it.

  138. Anonymous
    February 1st, 2010 at 10:28 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#44): Heaven knows someone needs to monitor Wilbur’s computer usage or he just might clean out the bank account to help out a needy Nigerian prince.

    @True Fable (#53): Perhaps you should design shoes for goats, those poor shoeless things.

    @gnome de blog (#64): If Shannon is really Toni’s daughter, then Brad is even more gullible than we imagined, if that’s at all possible.

    @mojo (#75): I remember the collective vapors that occurred when Trudeau showed that Joanie had slept with Rick out of wedlock. Trudeau has also shown Alex and Toggle sharing the same bed, although they don’t live together.

  139. Farley's Revenge
    February 1st, 2010 at 10:29 pm [Reply]

    Oh for pity’s sake. #138 was me.

  140. Black Drazon
    February 1st, 2010 at 10:33 pm [Reply]

    “Mama said there’d be days like this, when I’d wake up to the force of a non-euclidean explosion under my bed.”

  141. Farley's Revenge
    February 1st, 2010 at 10:34 pm [Reply]

    Blondie. Whoa. Did NOT see that one coming.

  142. NoahSnark
    February 1st, 2010 at 10:40 pm [Reply]

    The Perfesser would have had far fewer of these bad days if he was allowed to die with Shoe’s creator.

  143. queek, Source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 1st, 2010 at 10:42 pm [Reply]

    OK, I have to ask! Today features a new day in Judge Parker.

    How long has it been in real time since yesterday morning in JP time? (I know that some folks keep track of such things.)

  144. Dingo, the Essence of Purity and Virtue Incarnate™
    February 1st, 2010 at 10:57 pm [Reply]

    Hey, folks. I had a much larger missive that I wrote but I deleted it all. Fear of someone from work reading it. Please know that I’m here and always reading your comments. Because of the difficulty using the new version from home, I may not write as much as I did before.

  145. Saluki
    February 1st, 2010 at 10:57 pm [Reply]

    Why not just retool the strip around Knute, Puddles the dog, Shannon, and Mr. Fogarty, and do everyone a favor?

    Add the Ropers and you just might have the makings of a hit spin off.

  146. commodorejohn
    February 1st, 2010 at 10:59 pm [Reply]

    @queek, Source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#143): Hmm. Unless I missed something, the previous day began with Godiva’s ill-fated ride, all the way back on August 10th, meaning that it took up very nearly six months real time.

  147. FOOBed again
    February 1st, 2010 at 11:30 pm [Reply]

    Dawn might be wearing sandal band socks. I think they’re supposed to protect the foot from getting blisters when wearing sandals. I don’t know how common they are among college-age women in California though, especially to wear around the house when not wearing sandals.

    (I remember seeing a knitting pattern for these a few years back, and wondering if anyone would actually wear them.)

  148. Miss Othmar
    February 1st, 2010 at 11:33 pm [Reply]

    @Dingo, the Essence of Purity and Virtue Incarnate™ (#144): I know you’ve mentioned that you’re having trouble connecting to CC at home, but it was in bits and pieces so I am not sure exactly what’s going on. Maybe if you described the problem again someone can help you figure it out? Sounds like you need to refrain from websurfing at work for a little while (maybe while you collect evidence against your weaselly co-workers??) Let’s see if we can get you set up at home again.

  149. Topliff
    February 2nd, 2010 at 12:21 am [Reply]

    Judge Parker wasted such an opportunity today. Jules is clearly “well-heeled”, with his shoe factory, not “well-fixed.” If he were well-fixed, he’d be barren and would belong in Funky W.

  150. queek, Source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 2nd, 2010 at 12:26 am [Reply]

  151. Aaron
    February 2nd, 2010 at 12:47 am [Reply]

    @zenvelo (#2): And by “sub”, he means “submarine sandwich”… completely stuffed on the inside with salami, pickles and mayonnaise.

  152. Ari
    February 2nd, 2010 at 1:14 am [Reply]

    Say, was that a nod to the Beach Boys in the last panel of Luann? Because I will give them an extra point for cuteness there, if so.

  153. Ed Power, Cage Writer
    February 2nd, 2010 at 2:08 am [Reply]

    Hey CC folk,

    queek, Source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando @ Y95:

    Lio. Everything is better with platypi!!! (does this count as a MC x-over, or just something that Norm should be cluing in on?)

    Well, I’m telling people it’s a x-over. :)

    I’d like to take this oppriunity to point out our tvtropes page too:

    Ok, now the ‘insider’ stuff. ;)

    Josh @ Y15

    The whole Michael-Deanna weirdness was I think more about Lynn J.’s moral code than the syndicates. But I could be wrong.

    TheCasey @ Y19:

    And Norm & Bridget from My Cage aren’t married.

    matt w @ Y25

    Don’t Norm and Bridget live together in My Cage? I remember that Bridget had a roommate when they were broken up, but they seem to spend all their time together in Norm’s apartment otherwise.

    Ok, here’s the deal. When we signed the development deal with KFS the only chnage they requested (at first) was that Norm and Bridget couldn’t live together.

    At first we dropped more clues that Bridget was just always at Norm’s place but didn’t live there. Now, I just keep things kind of ambiguous. Readers can decide what they want.

    Speaking of the early days of the strip, did I mention you can buy our book at either createspace:


    Anyway, hope I’ve provided some insight….but most likely not….but I trired. :)


  154. Just some guy
    February 2nd, 2010 at 8:07 am [Reply]

    I really like looking at Judge Parker these days.
    I said “looking at”, not “reading”.

  155. Paul1963
    February 2nd, 2010 at 12:16 pm [Reply]

    And the 2/1 Family Circus was another retread! Replace “listen to my iPod” with “finger paint” and suddenly it’s 1970!

  156. Paul K
    February 2nd, 2010 at 1:13 pm [Reply]

    Michelle is clearly a fan of early 90s UK band, The La’s, as that shirt is actually a showcase of their album cover art, most likely purchased from a thrift store. There she goes indeed.'s_(album)

  157. Comcis Fan
    February 2nd, 2010 at 5:08 pm [Reply]

    #89 Cheech Wizard: No thank you for prompting me to look up PPO in the Urban Dictionary. I’ll stick with Preferred Provider Organization, even if it makes no sense in the Wilbur-Abby relationship of Mary Worth.

  158. Jack Pendarvis
    February 3rd, 2010 at 9:48 pm [Reply]

    I did a “search” of your web site, and didn’t find any mention of this, so forgive me if you’ve heard it. I tried! Anyway, there was a Gil Thorpe reference on the ABC sitcom MODERN FAMILY a week or two ago. One character had been forwarded a racy picture by a coworker and it got him into all sorts of crazy shenanigan-like mix-ups. The name of that coworker? Gil Thorpe. I thought you would want to know!

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