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Metapost: ALDOMANIA IS HERE

People, people: the moment you’ve all been waiting for has at last arrived. Aldomania 2006 merchandise is ready for purchase!

In anticipation of overwhelming demand, we have four shirt styles available: a ringer T, a junior baby doll T, a baseball jersey, and a junior raglan. PURCHASE! CONSUME! CONSUME! I DEMAND IT!

And once you’ve purchased and consumed, you need to send me a photo of yourself wearing your newly acquired product. Faithful reader bootsybooks recently let her friends and neighbors know where they can find more information about licorice:

C’mon, Comics Curmudgeon-gear purchasers, I need those pictures! I don’t have a “Hat Man” hat pic yet, which is clearly a crying shame. Just to show that I’m not above being pictured in ludicrous poses, I offer you this picture of myself in my snazzy finger–quotin’ Margo shirt:

Yes, I am at the Minnesota State Fair making finger quotes in front of a finger-quotin’ bear carved out of a log with a chainsaw. You kind of had to have been there.

Finally, for those of you who didn’t see it in the comments, you should all of you, those of you who enjoy 17th century poetry and those who do not, appreciate faithful reader Uncle Lumpy’s homage to our favorite mustachioed stalker and Andrew Marvell’s To His Coy Mistress.

To Aldo’s Coy Mistress

HAD we but world enough, and Time,
This coyness, Mary, were no crime –
An age to lounge beside the pool,
And suffer some damn chinbeard fool,
To squander half a human life
Conversing with his moron wife,
To gab the gab of Charterstone,
And scarf croquettes with my sweet crone.
O Mary! If but time allowed,
You could have done as you have vowed:
Be true to Jeff, your noble doc!
Keep one eye, dreaming, on the clock
That when he’s fixed up the displasia
Of every lip in Southeast Asia,
He’ll break free of his houseboy’s arms,
And fly to your uncertain charms.
But I, like water on the stone
Infest the nest that Jeff has flown
And — mixing metaphors with glee –
Insinuate my love on thee!
The fear, the rage, the angry glances
Which now repel my sweet advances
In time will grow attenuated
While my own Fires rage unabated.
In Time my Mojo I’ll unleash,
For time is on my side — capisce?

But always at my back I hear
A distant siren, drawing near
Foreshadowing my interdiction
By those of my old jurisdiction
Who think I may have killed my wife –
The fingerprints, the bloody knife,
Do little good to exculpate me –
I fear a jail cell may await me!
So Mary, Mary, shed that dress –
Though lips say “no”, your eyes say “yes”.
As much as I enjoy the chase
My trophy shall be your embrace.
And no fair rose will be as sweet
As your thin lips when mine they meet!
I’ll stake my claim and take my rest
Upon your desiccated breast
Just like those swans who mate for life.
So don’t you make me get my knife!
Oh, pardon me, you needn’t worry –
Just move it, bitch, I’m in a hurry!
And don’t you dare to cry out, “AAUGH” –
I’ve tapped your phone! I’ve read your blog!
Don’t sink my heart in dark despair –
I demand this be a love we share!
Who spurns the Stalkeroo’s affection
Can take a nap ’til Resurrection.

Oh, and lest we forget our cartoon favorites of yesteryear: Fencepost Frank has a MySpace account. (If you need a refresher on Frank, one of the most awesome Rex Morgan, M.D. incidental characters ever, click here.)

78 responses to “Metapost: ALDOMANIA IS HERE”

  1. 12802 crackers
    August 27th, 2006 at 10:20 pm [Reply]

    Wow, Aldomania has arrived! Work it like a claw, and you might find yourself originating the next “All Your Base” webphenom!

  2. Lapsed Librarian
    August 27th, 2006 at 10:21 pm [Reply]

    “Our state fair is a great state fair…”

    I’m glad you got to go to the absolutely superlative Minnesota State Fair! But you can’t just leave us hanging about that finger-quoting bear. What’s its story? I’m imagining all kinds of Mary Worth/Mark Trail/Gasoline Alley crossovers…

  3. comics
    August 27th, 2006 at 10:30 pm [Reply]

    Lapsed Librarian — technically he is not a finger-quotin’ bear but a liberal hippie bear flashing peace signs. But he sure looked like a figner-quotin’ bear to me.

    Josh

  4. 12802 crackers
    August 27th, 2006 at 10:35 pm [Reply]

    Actually, comics, I think that both the bear and Josh are flashing gangsta’ hand signs, for which the bear will soon be whacked by OGs.

  5. comics
    August 27th, 2006 at 10:44 pm [Reply]

    12802 crackers –

    comics = me = Josh, the guy who writes this blog. Really! That’s me in the picture! And the peace sign thing is the artist’s official statement on the matter. Your idea is more interesting, but as near as I can tell there are no gangs in Minnesota, as everybody is far too nice to whack anybody.

    Josh

  6. dan b
    August 27th, 2006 at 10:52 pm [Reply]

    i never noticed the similarity in teeth with RMMD Frank and reality Frank. holy. crap. that. is. awesome.

  7. Marc
    August 27th, 2006 at 11:17 pm [Reply]

    MW – I knew the plan wouldnt go into immediate action…So apparently Nurse McButch is talking to Mary again which she hangs up the number-less phone with a piece of string for the cord. In panel two the string is gone and Mary tells us she is DREADING going home.

    TDIET – Lemme see, I think ol’ gramps wants ta stay home an’ watch that buxom woman and th d-d-docter perform “surgery” together….oh yeah!

    SF – Is it me, or did their uniforms change colors?

  8. Canaduck
    August 28th, 2006 at 12:11 am [Reply]

    What a poem! Loved it. Um…and I have nothing else witty to say.

  9. Canaduck
    August 28th, 2006 at 12:12 am [Reply]

    Scratch that “else”–nothing witty to say, period!

  10. Lisa
    August 28th, 2006 at 12:18 am [Reply]

    My prediction:

    Scene: the DeGroot house. Luann cavorts in jailbait short-shorts. Mom daydreams about the kute kouple she met at kamp.

    DING DONG

    Brad: I’ll get it [opens door]. Why, Toni! What are you doing here?
    Toni: Brad, I came to tell you that I am in therapy. I know now that Dirk is bad for me. Bad, bad, bad. I will never see him again.
    Brad: Oh Toni!
    Toni: All I want in this world is to be with a pube-headed boy fireman who still lives at home with his parents.

    THEY RIDE OFF INTO THE SUNSET ON REDDY.

  11. MJ1066
    August 28th, 2006 at 12:18 am [Reply]

    Monday, August 28:

    Curtis: Why is Michelle suddenly being so nice? She must have a hidden agenda.

    Funky Winkerbean: Sigh. Les just can’t stop obsessing about school. I thought this was a clumsy way to lead up to the scene with Becky and the band director.

    Luann: Toni Daytona is back!

  12. MJ1066
    August 28th, 2006 at 12:23 am [Reply]

    #7, Marc: It’s not just you. Last week they were wearing solid orange uniform shorts and orange baseball caps. Today they’re wearing white shirts with dark blue trim and dark blue baseball caps.

  13. MJ1066
    August 28th, 2006 at 12:28 am [Reply]

    Sorry about the typo. I meant to write “solid orange uniform shirts,” not “solid orange uniform shorts.” The point is, why did the shirts change from solid orange to white with dark blue trim, and why did the baseball caps change from orange to dark blue? Was there a different team of colorists working this week than last week?

  14. AppleGirl
    August 28th, 2006 at 12:57 am [Reply]

    FOOB – I think Monday’s strip explains Lizardbreath’s expanding waistline. A box of Mac-n-Cheese and a package of Oreos for din-din. Comfort food!

  15. Virginia
    August 28th, 2006 at 2:49 am [Reply]

    My comment probably blongs in an older post, but when I have a “plan,” or “idea,” or “hare-brained scheme,” it usually involves pirates, time travel, and a well-made pizza with a six pack.

    True, my “ideas” never come to fruition, but they are probably more entertaining than whatever lame scheme Toby has come up with.

    Unless her plan has Groucho Marx disguises and Mary adopting a Natasha Badanoff accent, I’ll probably pass out mid read.

  16. Virginia
    August 28th, 2006 at 2:50 am [Reply]

    My comment probably belongs in an older post, but when I have a “plan,” or “idea,” or “hare-brained scheme,” it usually involves pirates, time travel, and a well-made pizza with a six pack.

    True, my “ideas” never come to fruition, but they are probably more entertaining than whatever lame scheme Toby has come up with.

    Unless her plan has Groucho Marx disguises and Mary adopting a Natasha Badanoff accent, I’ll probably pass out mid read.

  17. Doug Puthoff
    August 28th, 2006 at 3:36 am [Reply]

    Zits: I never thought I’d see the day when Connie Duncan would have something in common with Huey of “The Boondocks”: A paranoid dislike of Soda Pop.

  18. Len
    August 28th, 2006 at 5:05 am [Reply]

    Perhaps the Indian dad”s baseball cap “H” stands for “Hopi,” as another Curmudgeon suggested. I hadn’t noticed that he’s also wearing a Chinese Yin-Yang on his T-shirt. B.C. characters may be coming to show him a bible.

    http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20060827&name=Funky_Winkerbean

  19. Chris
    August 28th, 2006 at 6:13 am [Reply]

    It’s getting creepy…Saturday I saw an Aldo-lookalike at a realtor’s office…this morning, in the locker room of the pool where I swim, another one, a bit older, but with the same Bob Keeshan hair and ‘stache…and naked!

    My day has gotten off to a horrible start!

  20. bisbane
    August 28th, 2006 at 6:49 am [Reply]

    Today’s Get Fuzzy is great! My only hope is that Bucky doesn’t aim for me next…http://www.comics.com/comics/getfuzzy/

  21. Doug Puthoff
    August 28th, 2006 at 7:50 am [Reply]

    #20–Yer right. That’s the funniest strip I’ve read since “Tom the Dancing Bug’s” takeoff of the Grinch.

  22. yellojkt
    August 28th, 2006 at 7:54 am [Reply]

    I’m upset that FencePost Frank has more webfriends on MySpace than I do. And they’re pretty hott, too.

  23. Justafoob
    August 28th, 2006 at 8:40 am [Reply]

    Liz is excited because the only action she has been getting is from Mustache Tony. And that is man on top, bang bang bang, and then roll over to go to sleep.

    At least with Officer Doo, she got handcuffed once and a while. And the time he came over in full dress uniform. And the time he wore his native costume.

    Even Helicopter Boy, would swoop in at unexpected times for a romp in the supplies closet.

    This is the beginning of the rest of her life for Liz.

  24. bootsybooks
    August 28th, 2006 at 8:46 am [Reply]

    Sunday’s Foob was one of the creepiest yet. Sure a little pillowfight foreplay is just the ticket to get the old folks’ heart rates in the target range, but in the last frame, Elly looks like she’s in bed with Michael!

    It’s hard to tell any of her creatures apart, except for the hairstyles. Oh, and she puts glasses on the older characters, but basically Deanna looks like April who looks like Lizard who looks like Elly.

    Do they all look like Lynn Johnston?

  25. Racing Js
    August 28th, 2006 at 9:25 am [Reply]

    WINNER, WINNER, WINNER

    http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComic.mpl?date=2006/8/28&name=Pluggers

    I won!!!! My plugger comic in in the paper today! woohoo.

    Take that you Plugger-Wannabes
    Um. What did I win?

  26. Justafoob
    August 28th, 2006 at 9:38 am [Reply]

    Don’t misread Sunday’s FBOFW.

    Liz and Mike wind up in bed together in an turn for a new audience. Mike can now dump Deanna and Liz can have the perfect man in her life.

    This way they keep it all in the family.

  27. treedweller
    August 28th, 2006 at 9:38 am [Reply]

    CONTEST WINNER ALERT!Today’s Pluggers uses a Curmudgeon idea. I have no idea if the Curmudgeon got credit for it, but it’s the exact same idea in the correct strip. If it was you, fellow curmudgeonite, please enlighten us as to what sort of booty you receive. Congratulations!

  28. treedweller
    August 28th, 2006 at 9:40 am [Reply]

    Oops, I see I’m just a little late. Anyway, congrats. Racing Js.

  29. Craigers
    August 28th, 2006 at 9:44 am [Reply]

    Wild, mad applause for Racing Js, whose name shall be forever twinned with that of Brookins (and the beau ideal of Pluggerdom) in the annals of history.

    I’m just disappointed that he beat out my suggestion “Pluggers don’t just trap vermin, they breed like them too”

  30. cheech wizard
    August 28th, 2006 at 9:45 am [Reply]

    3-G Gina got the part? Since when do NY theatres have roles for ugly women? Though she does have a hot bod. No doubt Ari was coming by to borrow a paper bag to put over her head so he could maintain his erection during sex.

    JP – Neddy, who grows ever more worldly, has clearly been bought off by Randy’s opponent and is making over Apu to appear to be Randy’s cabana boy. The plot thickens when it is revealed that Apu is really an Islamic terrorist seeking to strike a mortal blow to America’s vital horse-breeding industry, but is too much of a dumbass to realize that you make bombs out of fertilzer, not animal feed!!!

  31. rajew
    August 28th, 2006 at 9:57 am [Reply]

    Hmm, ever since we were introduced to the subliminal message of slanting panels, my gadar is up. What does it mean in JP when the slant goes the other way?

  32. monkeyhawk
    August 28th, 2006 at 9:58 am [Reply]

    Congrats, Racing Js!

    Fellow Comics Curmudgeon Curmudgeons, we are truly in the presence of greatness.

    You give me renewed hope that my Blue Tooth tip to TDIET (now that it’s been used in several other strips) might still have a chance. Once (TDIET works through carbon paper gags and other 50s-era technologies)

  33. Chromium
    August 28th, 2006 at 10:09 am [Reply]

    OK, Chris, I think you might be suffering from CC-induced hallucinations. Get some help.

  34. rich
    August 28th, 2006 at 10:21 am [Reply]

    7, 12: I just want to know what the very tiny print on the front of the Sally Forth uniforms says. (Ugly uniforms, by the way.)

    FOOB: Liz is called in for an interview and immediately starts screaming that she has the job. I wondered if time had elapsed between the first two panels — is she now back from the interview, and they officially offered it to her? But no, it’s the same day. Perhaps the interview process works differently in Canada — or just for the saintly Pattersons.

  35. jg
    August 28th, 2006 at 10:23 am [Reply]

    Wow, the Andrew Marvell parody is exquisite. As one English major to another, let me point out that all that time reading “Beowulf” and “Canterbury Tales” and “Sir Gawain and the Green Knight’ can really pay off when your stuff gets posted on an obsessive-compulsive Web site like this one!

  36. banana
    August 28th, 2006 at 11:08 am [Reply]

    I wish there were a way to fit uncle lumpy’s poem on a shirt. It needs to be marketed somehow — maybe a poster? I’d buy that!

  37. AppleGirl
    August 28th, 2006 at 11:24 am [Reply]

    WAY TO GO, RacingJs!!!

    Curmudgeon infiltration of Pluggers is successful!

    And hey, that’s actually a good Pluggers for a change. Nice and simple. No depressing poverty/pawn shop/squalor references. Happy.

  38. BigJoe
    August 28th, 2006 at 11:26 am [Reply]

    JP: For those of you who don’t regularly read the strip, last week was a face paced exciting discussion of Randy’s opponents discussing their strategy. I’ve compiled all of the week’s ever changing conversation into one large collage of the week’s strips. I know it must have been confusing trying to understand what they were talking about, it’s not like they repeated themselves much or anything…

    http://home.comcast.net/~jterran/jp3.jpg

  39. Deckard Canine
    August 28th, 2006 at 11:45 am [Reply]

    #14 – Between this and Mary Worth’s tuna casserole, does it seem to you like the “realistic” comics do a worse job than the “unrealistic” ones at estimating reasonable food portions?

    #19 – GAHHH! I hope he wasn’t looking your way!

  40. Jay
    August 28th, 2006 at 11:57 am [Reply]

    Okay — I finally caught up on the weekend comics, and discovered that Spiderman is NOT — repeat, NOT — faking unconciousness in order to learn who really tried to kill MJ. No, instead, a dopy bodyguard ACTUALLY GOT THE DROP on the great webslinger, felling him with a lead pipe (in the ballroom) DESPITE the fact Spidey has a sixth sense that WARNS HIM OF IMPENDING DANGER.

    And now he’s “helpless,” wrapped in chains. Chains, people. Chains have rendered a superhero able to heave buses “helpless.”

    WTF?

  41. Jo Jo
    August 28th, 2006 at 11:59 am [Reply]

    Okay — I finally caught up on the weekend comics, and discovered that Spiderman is NOT — repeat, NOT — faking unconciousness in order to learn who really tried to kill MJ. No, instead, a dopy bodyguard ACTUALLY GOT THE DROP on the great webslinger, felling him with a lead pipe (in the ballroom) DESPITE the fact Spidey has a sixth sense that WARNS HIM OF IMPENDING DANGER.

    And now he’s “helpless,” wrapped in chains. Chains, people. Chains have rendered a superhero able to heave buses “helpless.”

    WTF?

  42. Racing J
    August 28th, 2006 at 12:23 pm [Reply]

    I’m so happy. Being a plugger has been my life long dream. I hope I get a hat. Then I can where it all the time.

    I’ll send you guys a picture when I get it…

    Now I got to work on my TDIET:

    Mr Woozit enters every contest known to man, waiting for his 15 minutes of fame…

    What happens?

    He wins!!! Finally!!!! What does he get???

    Nothing….. OH yeah!

  43. rich
    August 28th, 2006 at 12:34 pm [Reply]

    38: Excellent montage! But still — what are you talking about, Reg?

  44. yellojkt
    August 28th, 2006 at 12:35 pm [Reply]

    JoJo (#40) ButlerGuy studied up on Spidey’s weaknesses and knew just how many chains to use. That subscription to Janes Superheroes Weekly really paid off.

  45. SmartPeopleOnIce
    August 28th, 2006 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

    It’s a shrine to Molly the Minibear! Yay!

    While I’m here, anyone else notice that the inking in today’s FC makes Billy look like he’s sportin’ a pair of weird dual-tang prosthetic legs? Maybe my Greyhound bus interpretation of Sunday’s strip was prescient…

    spoi

  46. JonboyDC
    August 28th, 2006 at 1:06 pm [Reply]

    Y’all, I do believe that today’s Mary Worth has placed us in media res — Toby’s plan is afoot!

  47. bubujin
    August 28th, 2006 at 1:19 pm [Reply]

    MW–surely the nefarious plan hatched by Toby will stem from last Wednesday’s action when Mary slams the heavy glass doorway to Charterstone on O Stalker Lad, cutting off his left arm.

    http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20060823&name=Mary_Worth

    Before leaving the hospital, Mary will discover that Aldo has been admitted—to the SAME hospital!

    Hilarity and hijinks will ensue….stay tuned.

  48. Badly_Computer_Animated_Boy
    August 28th, 2006 at 1:24 pm [Reply]

    #3, 4 & 5 – I’m Joshicus!

  49. bubujin
    August 28th, 2006 at 1:24 pm [Reply]

    Oh, and d-a-a-amn you, Josh, for getting me hooked onto MW. Think I checked it daily while you were off finger quotin’ with Yogi.

    Must…resist..temptation…to…check…JP…GT…DT…A-3…

    Ah, never mind.

  50. Perry
    August 28th, 2006 at 1:46 pm [Reply]

    #19 Don’t worry. That’s just Aldomania sweeping the nation!

  51. Mibbitmaker
    August 28th, 2006 at 1:49 pm [Reply]

    Today:

    FOOB: A marriage is breaking up. WOO-HOO!! Now, Liz’ll offer to help that teacher beat her husband up.

    Lockhorns: She could’ve said the same line herself, but with more sarcasm.

    FW: Wow, what an amazing, incredible, unbelievable, contrived, badly-written, pointless and depressing coincidence! Who knew?

    FC: “Okay, Billy. Why don’t you smash up a couple more windows, too? It’ll be so good for you to leave a couple unharmed, honey.”

    Alternate FC comment: The sad part is, he wasn’t playing baseball at the time!

    A3G: Touche, Tommie! It’s almost like one of us wrote that. Racing J?…

    SF: “…you’re looking the wrong way!”

    Garfield: Again, if you eliminate the thought balloons, it’s much funnier. In fact, if you also remove the yawns/speech balloons, it’s even funnier than that.

    Rhymes with Orange: Vice Principal Henshaw is a mean, mean person.

    Nancy: Contrary to the punchline’s intent, Sluggo’s right… provided he were reading the right graphic novels. Gilchrists, information on the comic book medium today can be found on the internet. Maybe if they spent less time at “furries” conventions…

    Buckets/BBlues: More proof that syndicated strips aren’t written by children.

    Non Sequitur: Danae sure is no Josh! (High compliment, actually) This blog is an embarrassment of riches. No “blogger’s block” here, eh?

  52. juan mortyme
    August 28th, 2006 at 3:28 pm [Reply]

    Congrats, Racing Js! Good work.

  53. cheech wizard
    August 28th, 2006 at 3:33 pm [Reply]

    FC – alternate caption “I better not be smellin’ what I think I’m smellin’ or the baked eggplant ain’t gonna be the only thing in that kitchen that’s a puffy red pulp.”

    Lockhorns – Is it any surprise that they don’t appear to have children? Is that the cause, or an effect, of their seething mutual abhorrence?

    FOOB – Whoohoo! Some teacher left her husband! I not only got me a job, I might be able to get a new man out of it as well!!! Pass the mac ‘n cheese!!

  54. bootsybooks
    August 28th, 2006 at 3:59 pm [Reply]

    Phantom: so the Chatu story just…ends? What, he whistles for his wolf and his horse, and he just goes back to the Batcave, um Skull Cave?

    So what we can expect is that Chatu will return for more unspecified skulduggery, Phantom will stop him, they’ll throw some unintentionally hilarious dialogue at each other, and then Chatu escapes without ever mentioning what evil he came to do,and the Phantom walks home through the jungle shoeless.

    Then the whole process begins again. I hate you, Phantom. Sure, for a while I loved your purple suit and your striped ass, but now you’ve just pissed me off.

  55. marky mark
    August 28th, 2006 at 4:34 pm [Reply]

    Another comic takes on bears.

    Okay, I admit I’ve just been waiting for an excuse to bring this strip up since I saw it on the Chron pages. It’s very bizarre–basically, the same crappy jokes you’d find in dozens of mediocre strips, but with that certain air of racist undertones that you can still get away with as long as it’s not directed at the wrong minority. Plus, it occasionally has themes and situations specific to the Wild West, such as this one.

    I used to see it sometimes at my grandmother’s, and I always assumed it was by the same guy who did Tumbleweeds, but it really has its own artist/writer. I still don’t quite know what to make of it.

  56. treedweller
    August 28th, 2006 at 4:38 pm [Reply]

    Here’s a recycled FC joke, recycled again by a different comic: B&G

  57. gnome de blog
    August 28th, 2006 at 5:02 pm [Reply]

    #34: It’s not that interesting. It says “Rosemount.”

  58. BigJoe
    August 28th, 2006 at 5:06 pm [Reply]

    #41 – RJ, if I recall correctly, I think I remember somebody posting on this site that readers who get their suggestion turned into a comic get a signed copy of the comic.

    I think, unless I’m confusing it with something else. Could be TDIET’s prize I’m thinking of.

  59. K Bear
    August 28th, 2006 at 5:09 pm [Reply]

    anyone notice that raju’s new hairstyle magically gave him muscle tone as well?
    it’d be so funny if the strip morphs into a bollywood movie.

  60. Chris
    August 28th, 2006 at 5:53 pm [Reply]

    #49, Aldomania sweeping the country!

    I am meeting tomorrow with new clients, for the first time, and I tell you, if one of them is an Aldo-look-a-like I will freak and dive out the window, screaming platitudes as I meet death.

  61. Uncle Lumpy
    August 28th, 2006 at 6:09 pm [Reply]

    Chris -

    Some words of advice:

    “Meet your death with a happy face,
    “So you don’t leave life in disgrace!”

    Use’m on the way down!

  62. bisbane
    August 28th, 2006 at 6:12 pm [Reply]

    OK Curmudgeon fans, I hope this is not a repeat of “old news” for you, but you have to check out this site about Urban Legends–specifically Bloody Mary! About half way down the page, you run into this little gem: “Summoning Mary requires the right chant. “I believe in Mary Worth” is the key phrase according to one version”.

    I promise that I am not making this up–in fact, something like this is too good to be made up anyway! Hiliarious!!! http://www.snopes.com/horrors/ghosts/bloodymary.asp

  63. Url
    August 28th, 2006 at 6:23 pm [Reply]

    http://img201.imageshack.us/my.php?image=tit20060828ak6.jpg

    What gives with today’s Tiger? I guess the younger brother is meant to be covering his shame, but one drawback to having characters with such stubby little arms is that they can’t even reach below their belly buttons. The character’s apparent lack of genitals is taking attention away from the joke about laundry day

  64. MossMoses
    August 28th, 2006 at 6:23 pm [Reply]

    “Calling it a a day, Mary”. Judy sure has a stammering problem (or maybe she used to work in the Department of Redundancy Department). She just needs a little self confidence and some tender loving meddling to overcome her speech impediment. I’m kind of surprised other curmudgeonites didn’t point out the redundancy. Also, “I don’t know what to expect” makes no sense at all. She just got done explaining how predictable Aldo is in his stalking, how he waited for her every time she came home. Maybe she means she doesn’t know what to expect from Toby’s hairbrained plan.

  65. El-ron
    August 28th, 2006 at 6:25 pm [Reply]

    http://img201.imageshack.us/my.php?image=tit20060828ak6.jpg

    What gives with today’s Tiger? I guess the younger brother is meant to be covering his shame, but one drawback to having characters with such stubby little arms is that they can’t even reach below their belly buttons. The character’s apparent lack of genitals is taking attention away from the joke about laundry day gone mad

  66. James Schend
    August 28th, 2006 at 6:42 pm [Reply]

    What’s with the rated-X ad at the top of the page? Criminy, some people try to read this site at work.

  67. leftcoast.pdx
    August 28th, 2006 at 7:06 pm [Reply]

    Un. Believable. Epic. Poem.
    Many Thanks!

    My little
    Haiku for Mary:

    Autumn brings stalkers
    Oblivious wife killers
    Lusting for Mary

  68. Von Zeppelin
    August 28th, 2006 at 7:17 pm [Reply]

    God, we’re proud of you, Racing Js. It’s an honor to be a part of this great community of Curmudgeonists. I love you guys. I really do. (Tear trickles unashamedly down masculine cheek.)

    Actually, this is better than my real family in some ways.

    Turning to the Raju makeover, I think he looks like the Penguin in the far-off, Bob Kane-drawn days of Batman. Or, “The” Batman, as he was known of old. Not to be confused with “A” Batman. Anyway, Raju has something of the Penguin’s mocking grin and overbite in panel 2. Replace the Harry Potter specs with a monocle, add forty pounds and a Rooseveltian cigarette holder, and voila!

  69. AppleGirl
    August 28th, 2006 at 10:08 pm [Reply]

    41 – Racing Js, GO for it on that TDIET! To guarantee success, make sure you show a guy in a 57 Plymouth convertible. A tiny clown-sized one. With fins.

  70. Hogenmogen
    August 29th, 2006 at 8:50 am [Reply]

    Say what you will about Tomalia in today’s TDIET, but she’s the only one of the horde that actually brought food to the potluck.

    Dick Tracy’s August 25 strip shows DT taking a call. A few days later, he takes the same call. Note to artist: You’ve only got so much space to carry your story, why waste it by repeating the same action? Not even a critical or plot-twisting action – in fact getting a phone call isn’t much action at all.

    No one will accuse 9CL of going soft now. Macho Seth with a “F*%k Jane Austen (half-sister of Steve Austin, bionic man).”

    Foob: More letter madness. Ticka-tappa-ticka. Ha ha ha.

  71. Hogenmogen
    August 29th, 2006 at 9:02 am [Reply]

    MW: The “plan” is to have Ian Cameron pose as Mary’s boyfriend, and abuse Aldo to tears with his rampant opinions on Charterstone landscaping.
    Prof: The management should surely put in some day lillies here.
    Aldo: I think the rose bush is fine. It reminds me of my sweet Mary’s – I mean my sweet but dead wife’s fair hands.
    Prof: Harrumph! You’re wrong, I’m right, and that’s now solved. Now, look at that shrub. They should have planted an oak tree.
    Aldo: Oak takes decades to look good, and it won’t grow in this climate. The shrub is as lush as my sweet Mary – uh, my dead wife’s hair.
    Prof: Oak tree, sir, and you are wrong again! Now, see this mulch?
    Aldo: Yes, it reminds me of where I buried my sweet Mar- wife.
    Prof: Harrumph! If you say “Mary” one more time, I shall force feed you tofu croquettes through your nasal passages!

  72. bootsybooks
    August 29th, 2006 at 9:51 am [Reply]

    TDIET: HogenMogen, I think her name is Tomania, as in ptomaine poisoning. But you’re right, she’s the only one who actually brought anything. Arfo and Herkie and Insania and Batshit Crazia and and all those other goofuses in that strip are just sitting around waiting for the “liver pot pate” which I can only pray to Jah actually contains pot.

    In Phantom, I wish we could see what Hero and Devil are thinking as Phantom summons them with a wimpy little TWEEE!

    Hero (I guess he’s the horse): Damn! He’s gonna be Ghost-With-A-Hoofprint-Upside-His-Head.

    Devil (by process of elimination, the wolf):I’m gonna shove that whistle where the sun don’t shine!

  73. rich
    August 29th, 2006 at 10:33 am [Reply]

    64:That’s a very disturbing Tiger strip…

    70: Excellent Ian impression!

  74. Angie
    August 30th, 2006 at 8:13 am [Reply]

    Inspired, Uncle Lumpy. That poem was inspired.

    By the way, I think you’ve got almost as much time on your hands as Aldo. Yikes.

    Seriously, though, I enjoyed the poem.

  75. Beane
    August 30th, 2006 at 12:31 pm [Reply]

    How about a shirt that just says: I refuse to believe that you prefer to be alone.

  76. Marty
    August 30th, 2006 at 1:53 pm [Reply]

    I desperately want a shirt with this on it…but I don’t want a ringer T. Any chance of getting a regular T?

  77. Paul in NJ
    August 31st, 2006 at 4:40 pm [Reply]

    How many bloggers were at the MN State Fair, anyway? There’s you, Lileks, Captain Ed (CQ) and the rest of the Northern Alliance…

    Sheesh, who knew that MN could turn into the Blogger Capital of America!

  78. Carly
    November 20th, 2007 at 3:16 pm [Reply]

    Whoa, the triple finger quotin’ action there is trippy. It’s like those pictures where there’s a picture hanging on the wall, which is the same as the picture you’re looking at that, and then in that picture there’s the same picture again…

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