Jesus isn’t your waiter, Dolly
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Mark Trail, 4/14/18
OK, fine, Jim isn’t dead, but he did have a good chunk of his shirt just completely ripped off, and is now standing around awkwardly, nipple exposed to the forest breezes. If this circus storyline has taught us one thing, it’s that the woods are full of dangers that can rip your sleeve clean off, leaving your muscular upper arms sexily visible.
Marvin, 4/14/18
Marvin is a strip that, infuriatingly, bounces back and forth between its infant characters’ speech being presented in thought bubbles or straight up word balloons, and it’s a small thing I’m willing to overlook, except in cases like today, where the distinction between actual, literal speech and, like, psychic baby communication is important! Marvin has more than a five-word vocabulary! He says seven words in the first panel of this comic strip! I swear to god, they plant these just so I’ll say “No, really, go back to the jokes about shitting.”
Family Circus, 4/14/18
Ha ha, look how angry Jeffy is as Dolly embellishes on the sacred word! Looks like he’s found the heretic!
Gasoline Alley, 4/14/18
Guys, who … who does Gasoline Alley think Paris Hilton is
125 replies to “Jesus isn’t your waiter, Dolly”
What The Funky: Oh, great. We’re in for a prolonged arc where Mopey Pete And Darrine Jarre reactivate the Holtron (with a tech manual and spare parts purchased from some wealthy baby boomer) and are regaled with stories of Westview High in the Seventies.
Flaccid Writingstyle: Why would they need a “lighter, more mobile” version of a machine that just sits there? It’s like hiring a Funkyverse cartoonist with better eyesight and improved dexterity. Who’d notice the difference?
Judge Cratered: The rest of the staff will warm up to Needy once they find the barbecue pit and lighter fluid.
Judge Dreadful: It’s astonishing, how each new arc finds a unique way to be stupid beyond words.
Luann: Is Luann relieved or disappointed because Nil may have outed her?
Marked-Down and Trailed-Off: Wilburp! Get out of that tree! Take your stalking ways back to Santa Royale!
Mark Trail: Vacation, Mark? Hah! Wait until Monday when Cherry tells you Rusty ran away to join the circus.
Mary’s Girth: “Since I got home, Iris, I’ve driven my daughter away–er, all the way to the airport! I’ve been stalking–er, eating celery stalks! I’ve even bathed–uh, bathed them in mineral water! For my health!”
Mad Magazine’s Phantom: How is it full daylight in one part of Bangagong and midnight in another?
Retch Morgan, Mortician’s Delight: It’s funny because Jughead’s antics will rip out his stitches and he’ll choke to death on his own blood, while Nikki and Kelly laugh at him.
Gasoline Alley-What decade does Gasoline Alley take place in?
Archie-“I had to do things. Things that Veronica refused to do.”
MW-“Traveling agreed with me so much I’m thinking about doing it again.”
MT-Is that Rusty in the tree?
FC-No pumpernickel?
Spiderman-Kurt Connors is rather ripped for a scientist.
MT: “That’s, um… that’s just fine, Mark.” [aside] “Hey Jim, did you invite this bumpkin to come with us or something? I’m pretty sure I didn’t. Also, did you double-check that list like I asked? I’m pretty sure there was supposed to be a monkey.”
Marvin: “I guess you’re right. Here’re another three words I’ve been working on: ‘up yours, jackass.’ Tell you what, Lil Chomsky, why don’t you leave the plans for global conquest to me and go back to your Great Big Book of Gray Rectangles.”
Family Circus: What’s really funny is that the book Dolly has open is “Hop on Pop.”
MT: Mark looks like he is bearing grave news, such as the bald guy’s father has died. If Mark had actual human feelings, of course.
Blondie: Hmm. Dagwood’s not eating, sleeping, attacking mailmen, doing a hack job on the Wingleheimer report, or overtly failing as a husband and father. Could this be a strip where Dag’s not being an awful scumbag for once? Well, kudos to- wait, never mind, he’s flagrantly disregarding leash laws. False alarm.
CS: Somehow I get the idea everyone else in the room is wishing that Lillian would just stop talking and sit down already so someone else could ask a question. Somehow I don’t think this is likely without a jump-cut to after the Q&A panel.
JP: Just a reminder: what Neddy is frantically apologizing for is her failure to notice Ronnie’s “Midwest accent” and thinking she might be a SoCal native. But Neddy’s making good friendship progress now; Ronnie has conceded that Neddy may be tolerable so long as she never speaks again.
Paris Hilton mopped the floor using a Segway scooter on her and Nicole Richie’s reality show, so the Gasoline Alley folks DO know who Paris Hilton is (was–her 15 minutes up?)!!!! I’m surprised but they do!
MT: Did they miss an animal? (Last panel, up in the tree, in silhouette.)
FC: I hate it when they have both a word balloon AND a caption. It destroys the one-panel nature of the strip. And is there any reason why one utterance should get a balloon, and the other be rendered as a caption? It was okay when The Far Side did it, though.
MW: I hope Zuck, I mean Zak, invites Wilbur to go camping with them.
Phantom: This strip has stopped making sense for awhile now. Phantom’s behavior is inexplicable and seemingly counterproductive.
Henry finds out what happened to his long lost brother.
MW: “And you look…clean. Bathing must agree with you.”
“You have no idea.”
FC: “And then he said ‘Make Judea Great Again.’ See, it’s all here.”
Cherry: “Sorry about your shirt, Jim, but I was desperate.”
There is apparently video of Paris Hilton trying to mop on a “reality” show.
https://youtu.be/CSxD__YIUZ8
No, I didn’t know that before I saw this comic and searched.
Phantom: I’ve noticed lately that Manley draws Devil with arms rather than front legs. It gives him a nice werewolfian tinge. Devil, that is, not Manley.
MT: The utter sadness of Mark in panel two (I mean, for the standards of this strip) makes it clear that I would want nothing more than to stay with these animals and leave his stupid human family alone
FC: Jesus lived in the Mediterranean world, where grain was the staple of the diet, but not all grains were equal. Pliny the Elder said that rye was “very poor food and only serves to avert starvation”. This is the kind of food would find in the barbaric north, so someone offering rye bread would be worse than table scraps. Wheat would be the cereal most common. Indeed, a big part of the Roman empire’s infrastructure and expenses was devoted to bringing wheat to the plebs of Rome, usually from Egypt the breadbasket of the empire. But even so, white bread is made with only the best part of wheat, so it would be a delicacy. So really, these three kinds of bread are very different and they have massive cultural and social implications. I really appreciate Dolly’s devotion to the study of Classic Antiquity. And I thought “Family Circus” was only there to make tame jokes!
MT: Well, Jim’s all ready to play Jim Kirk in the next Trek reboot film.
Crankshaft: It’s not easy becoming the new Jessica Fletcher.
MT: $^#*! It’s that $^#*%+ monkey again!! He already got me into enough trouble at Lost Forest Bar and Grille! Don’t tell me they’re gonna leave him here. We don’t need any more monkeyshines!
To tell the truth, I’ll be glad to see the “circus animals” go … They’ve really disrupted the peace and quiet of the ‘Wood. Besides taking jobs away from the natives. Now, I will miss Rompin’ Rhino … he’s a fine actor and has pretty much assimilated himself into our culture … he can even portray a Plugger! Let’s see MonkeyGuy do that!
@Carl: There is apparently video of Paris Hilton trying to mop on a “reality” show.
See? There are some ‘mudges, and I’m not naming names, who are orgulous about their encyclopedic knowledge of Pop Culture*. Then, there is Gasoline Alley.
// *It’s a fair cop, guv’nor!
I think he just wants her to start working at the Hilton Hotel in Paris, France, and get out of his diner.
Duck Twacy: “I’ll ride ahead to the railroad construction crew and get a better nickname.”
Now I know what Sid was referring to when he said he got Melody a role in the Vitamin Flintheart movie and swore me to secrecy. I figured it was some kind of spinoff, rather than a fake in-comic movie scene. Nice job stepping Into your great grandmother’s hoof steps,Miss Mare.
Family Circus: Blasphem-ilicious!
Mark Trail: The monkey in silhouette hiding in the tree. It’d better be preparing to leap down onto a passerby to rip his face off in a screaming arm-flinging frenzy. It’s still holding a grudge for being made to wear a fez.
Rex Morgan: He’s going viral? I don’t see anyone with a frame. Also, in a hospital, “going viral” probably isn’t the best choice of words for someone who wants to be discharged soon.
Hagar the Horrible: In an odd coincidence, all-you-can-eat buffets in Japan are generically referred to as Viking Restaurants. Back in the 60’s, the first smörgåsbord restaurant was named “Viking” and thus a food service nickname was born.
xkcd: Turkish Delight is a little subtle; I had the same reaction to the Narnia books. But I came to like the stuff, and now I have a hard time finding it in stores. I mean, I wouldn’t betray members of my immediate family for Turkish Delight, but some of my cousins should mind their steps…
// Re: the mouseover. It’s hardly worth bothering over the lawn at this point, but it should be “whomever”, drat it all to heck.
@Zla’od: On Zak inviting Wilbur camping-
Do you think Zak and Iris’ relationship can survive Iris looking on as Zak tells Wilbur to squeal like a piggy?
@Charles Nelson, Really!: Well, it’s a living! Seriously, I always wanted to be in an old-timey Western, so I guess this is close enough. The only problem was all that white makeup … they said “Vista Bill” had to be identified as a “good guy” on a white horse. But my Mane ‘n Tail Nourishing Makeup Remover with vitamin E took care of it easily.
@Charles Nelson, Really!: Set pointy sticks to stun, er um, poke!
@Zla’od: Phantom has reached the point where it only works as a parody. Or would if it showed any awareness of how loony it’s become.
Flunky Wrinkledbrain/Crankshaft: The “importance” and “value” of the Mary Sue character Holtron to the story both in universe and out would seem to give credence to the fan theory that FW and Crankshaft are in reality just a story being “written” by the Westview computer as it waits for DeForrest Kelly’s agent to return his invite to Kelly to be a guest at Westview’s Trekfest ’80.
Mary Worth – The sexual tension in this dialogue is Pickup Artist perfect.
“Being home from your travels must agree with you.” means Iris saw the Instagram of Wilbur in the Speedo. Notice it’s not a question.
Wilbur’s retort “You have no idea.” is just his way of negging her.
They’ll be banging again in no time. (Well, in MW time, it will be a year.)
FC – What, no “gluten free” joke? It’s a miracle!
MT: The checklist of animals IS actually complete, despite the monkey in the tree. Jim put Rusty in a cage and checked off monkey.
@Jeffery Lindholm: I never saw that show so I didn’t get the Paris Hilton joke. I do know she was the prototype for the Kardashians.
@Your pal, Nehemiah Scudder: Boscov’s has it, if you have Boscovs. I imagine you can order it. You can also get it online through Vermont Country Store and other outlets. I love the stuff but haven’t had it in a couple of years.
@Baka Gaijin: BWAHAHAHAHA
@Your pal, Nehemiah Scudder: I don’t understand why Turkish Delight gets no respect. Even the usually-charming Dorothy Sayers, in Strong Poison, digresses from the narrative for a wholly gratuitous and unfair rant against that fine confection.
And yet, people are crazy for the superficially similar “gummy” candies, which are like chewing on artificially flavored inner tubes.
Blondie: Elmo’s Adult Coloring Books are a bit more Adult then Dag expected.
JP: the only thing that would save this storyline if they jump to Neddy’s yoga class. Downward facing dog would be a good pose.
MW: Credit where credit is due. Karen Moy has done a great job of portraying Wilbur as pathetic and unattractive in every way.
MT – I know the CCC community is interested, but the Adopt-A-Rhino program requires an apartment of at least 600 sq. ft. before they’ll even consider an application….
Marvin – You might consider becoming a turd conqueror first….
FC – Anything in a peta-pocket?
GA – So, he wants little Giggle sucked-off?
Adios Amigos, DJ.
@Peanut Gallery:
Scudder: I don’t understand why Turkish Delight gets no respect.
———————————
I think it might be the name.Naming something Delight may seem to be the kind of hubris that inspires attack.
Beatup Bailey: “Hey $50 guy, the 3D movie’s been over for three weeks! How bout returning those glasses to the box office?”
GassedUp AlleyCats: As I understand it Paris Hilton is an artificial life form cloned from the skin cells of a France hotel chambermaid, genetically programmed to clean up messes.
@24 Melody Mare, as herself:
You missed a spot.
HtH: “Hagar!Stash the food in your breastplate like I do!”
Six Chimps: “Echo, why do I use a butcher’s block as a table?” “Echo, will this comic ever be more than warmed over “Cathy”?”
Marvin: didn’t the shit machine have a baby sister or am I imagining that?
Ziggy: They have the right not to serve Ziggy unless he’s wearing le pants and le shoes.
To be fair, from the drawing, we cannot tell if Ziggy is wearing pants and shoes or not. However, any day is a good day to be “poking the Ziggy”.
MT: Are we sure that’s a monkey in that tree? It could be a giant tarantula.
I am confused about the Mary Worth timeline, didn’t Wilbur and Iris see each other just after he got back and she broke his heart
a mayonnaise and white bread sammitchwith the news about Zak?Why would she be saying something like this now? Or is she just trying to make small talk so Wilbur will go away so that she and Zak can test the air mattresses and see if they can with stand some great boinking stress?
Should I write to the advice column in the Santa Royale Shopper and pose my question there?
If y’all are wondering what Sid looks like, he makes an appearance in today’s Speed Bump.
RwO: Another page out of the Gary Larson play book.
@Sequitur:
Or Rusty.
He is old enough to join the Shriners now and after the initiation would be drunk enough to climb into a tree and throw his shit around.
R.I.P. Road Runner.
@50 Marked Trail:
Rusty would probably try that except he would forget to take off his pants and the shit ball would roll harmlessly out his pants leg.
Okay, Family Circus, you lost me.
Usually your religious comics are things like (Looking at the ocean waves) “Why is God flushing the ocean?” or (looking at a sunset) “God got out his crayons”
But when you actually need to know the Bible to get the joke, that’s going too far. Family Circus is gradually becoming the new B.C.
@Sequitur:
Ziggy: They have the right not to serve Ziggy unless he’s wearing le pants and le shoes.
To be fair, from the drawing, we cannot tell if Ziggy is wearing pants and shoes or not. However, any day is a good day to be “poking the Ziggy”.
——————————————————–
Le Chef is squinting feverishly at something. Careful Zig! it’s a cookbook!
@Dimensionalotter:
Family Circus is gradually becoming the new B.C.
——————————————
Can we start calling Dolly “Fatfaced Broad”?
MT: It’s obviously the Phantom up in the tree. We never saw that coming, James!
Now to get Rusty off to Tibet, and Mark and Cherry on vacation to Santa Royale, and the Grand Unification will be complete.
The Schlockhornes:”Lorretta, THIS is the Redzone, YOU are the Deadzone. Big difference.”
MT-“Rusty, you come out of that tree. Jim, take that stick and knock Rusty out of the tree.”
@Charles Nelson, Really!:
That is hurtful for all the pleasantly plump faced people out there.
How about we just call her bitchy face?
K&K: Remember, kids file them down to #2 claws for the final pouncing exam.
@Widdle Jeffy:
Widdle Jeffy
April 14th, 2018 at 8:00 am Reply
@Charles Nelson, Really!:
That is hurtful for all the pleasantly plump faced people out there.
How about we just call her bitchy face?
—————————————————
Works for me.
Sex Morphine: Medically Deficent: “That’s HiLoisious! As in something funny enough to appear in “Hi&Lois”, “
@Charles Nelson, Really!: #38
“Turkish Delight” also sounds too much like the procedure of dropping the soap during a shower in a Turkish prison.
@Marty Worthless: #47
“didn’t Wilbur and Iris see each other just after he got back and she broke his heart”
Vague memory says she “broke his (clogged) heart” over the telephone, not in person.
Of course, Wilbur *ha* seen HER since then, if only through clumps of stalker-foliage or through car windows obstructed with roses, so I’ll allow half credit.
Marvin is playing us like a kazoo.
@Shrug:
I believe you are correct.
How sad has my life become when I worry about the logic of Wilbur’s lovelife?
I would go for a walk, but these shoes and this coat…..jeeeez!
@The Purging Lutheran:
Trust me, you don’t want to see Marvin play a kazoo.
@Sequitur: Heh,heh,heh … ya know I’m better lookin than THAT, pal! When they asked me to do a cameo in Speed Bump, I agreed – IF they would disguise my appearance. I got enough trouble avoiding the paparazzi as it is. Always trying to buttonhole me for dish on my star clients. It’s hard to even get out to The Club to meet and greet. And fageddabout the gym – never know who’ll be hiding in the steam room….
God, I love this business!
@Sid, Agent to the Animal Stars!:
Don’t flatter yourself, Sid. I have the pictures of mom tying a porkchop around your neck to get the other dogs to play with you.
MW – Zak is checking out the backpacks, figuring out how many condoms they will hold.
FC – Once again, the kids, especially Dolly, look like a Mr. Potato Head put together wrong. Her head looks like it’s on her shoulders backwards. If it isn’t, and her shoulders are actually rolled forward like that, she’s going to be a hunchback before she’s out of high school.
JP – Join the club. I’ve been reading this more than five years, and I haven’t warmed to her, either. In fact, every time I see her, I wish she had fallen into that sinkhole.
FW: From me and my rusted Honda CRV whose back doors are rusted shut, fuck you and your wealthy baby boomers. From my baby boomer friend who’s been a respected editor all his life and is trying to live in Mexico because he can’t afford to live here in Canada, fuck you and your wealthy baby boomer. From another baby boomer friend who has been struggling to keep a steady job only to have them disappear out from under him for the past 30 years, fuck you and your wealthy baby boomer.
And yeah, God help us if some baby boomer who does have money managed to get his hands on a prop from a movie that he and other baby boomers spent good money to go see and to make profitable.
And fuck anyone else who’s going to dump on baby boomers with stupid, cliche, biased insults.
Fuck You!
ASM: So we have to believe that JJJ can’t hear whiny Spider-Man and hear Peter Parker’s voice? I guess that’s canon.
BB: The practice of hiring a substitute was a legal way to get out of risking getting your nuts shot off in battle. Considering you’ve never been within firing range of any conflict for the last half-century, what’s your excuse?
GT: So the heckler’s veto’s alive and well in Milford? She’ll be wearing a mask and trashing the Starbucks next.
VA3G: Wow, doctors had a lot more authority back in 1970. Of course, New York had no competent physicians in 1970. Not even Rex Morgan would practice there.
@Hershel — THE Agent to the Animal Stars!!: Slow day in stir, huh, Bro? Yeah, Mom always did like me best – she just sprayed you with coyote urine! Dogs wouldn’t even come near ya! That pork chop gave me a rapport with animals that led me to the success I enjoy today!
@70 I speak Jive: (on FC)
Her new name will be Quasidodo.
@74 Anonymous:
And in case anyone was wondering or even cares, that was me.
Beetle Bailey-Beetle’s just upset that he can’t afford to pay somebody to fight instead of him.
@Sid, Agent to the Animal Stars!:
Treif is the lazy man’s way to success.
MT-“And there’s no way I can get out of taking my family on vacation,” Mark groans in despair.
@Liam:
Make it a “fishing trip” so when you bail on it Rusty and Cherry will not be surprised.
@FrankLee MeiDere:
Sorry for all your woe.
Maybe you could get a job as a Holtron programmer.
MT: Okay, every possible vacation destination in the world, you’ve been put on notice. Mark Trail and his family might visit you in the very near future. Prepare for the worst.
Marvin: I think that kid on the right is reading Concrete: A Pictorial History.
FC: Dolly gets most of her theology from truck stop waitresses.
GA: In Dawn’s defense, she can only see the stick part of the mop in panel one. For all she knows, that could be a bow staff.
FC-And then Jesus said, “No wine for me just water,” he says with a wink.
@Liam:
And because it was Olive Garden, he got endless bread sticks.
GA: Now that T-Bone’s assured of keeping his diner he’s getting a wild marketing idea. Of course it’s just a redo of the Paris Hilton Carl’s Jr. ads from a dozen years ago, but if you haven’t seen it, it’s new to you.
Marvin: You know how the Khmer Rouge targeted academics and intellectuals, sometimes murdering people just because they wore eyeglasses which showed they were readers? Yeah, keep that in mind for when Marvin grows up.
FW: Of course Holtron being so heavy and bulky transporting it will likely result in back injuries for Durwood and Mopey Pete. So yes, there is an upside.
GT: Marty Moon should have been off the air before he imploded? Would that have been, like, twenty years ago when he was a station intern?
Luann: As an artist, as a model, whatever. Either way would give her some justification for being on campus.
RMMD: How to put this? If your aim is to capture footage of Justin being goofy, I really don’t think you need to wait for surgery or anesthesia.
S-M: Why is Connors still lying helplessly on the ground? Hey art monkey, he’s missing an arm, not both legs.
@Baka Gaijin:
The Return of MRSA. This time it’s personal!
Bliss “Talk about your ‘Night Moves’!” (For those who may not be familiar with it, “Bliss” is a one-panel comic by Harry Bliss, whose other work appears in the “The New Yorker” and aims his humor at upscale liberal white baby boomers..but I’m being redundant. )
FW: Can’t Mopey and Dopey sell Holtron to rich baby boomer Chester Hagglemore? If they act quickly before Chester loses all his money on his comics scheme….
MT: Wasn’t Mexico the intended vacation destination? Where’s Dirty hanging out these days? Is he still enjoying the pink sands in the Bahamas? Have Doc and the schoolmarm gone on their date yet? So many questions.
I wish Jack & Nill had thier own comic
@Sequitur:
R.I.P. Road Runner.
—————————
What a time for Ol’ Wyle E. to be out selling his urine to Acme Co.
@Myrtle:
Myrtle
April 14th, 2018 at 12:01 pm Reply
MT: So many questions.
—————————
Don’t forget “When are the feral clowns set to explode?”
Nancy-“I went down to Mexico and flashed people.”
@Charles Nelson, Really!:
And the clowns will burn fast because they are full of alcohol.
@Charles Nelson, Really!: Where are the clowns? There ought to be clowns!
@Beetle Bumstead:
They got cloned,
Housepets!: Keene’ll touch the cursed coin and turn into a certain toupee wearing, orange real estate mogel turned pollitico.
Turkish Delight? Isn’t that stuff made out of white sugar and cows’ hooves?
RMMD-“This could make us big. Channel Awesome big.”
@98 Ukulele Ike:
Yes, yes it is with a bit of flavoring added.
It’s also the most successful Dutch film ever made.
@Beetle Bumstead:
Send in the clowns!
@102 Liam:
Don’t bother, they’re here.
@Liam: And then Jebus gave Jubas the stink-eye after he said they’d need twelve individual checks….
DT: Later when his career took a downturn, Vista Bill was reduced to making credit card commercials … as
Visa Bill. (damn phone)
GA: This had to be drawn when everyone knew who she was.
Marvin: I’ve got five words for you….SUCK, SUCK, SUCK, SUCK, IT.
Pluggers: Tune into Gunsmoke on INSP, which has become the all-old Western network.
LHs: Four out of five infuriated housewives agree – NFL RedZone provides such excellent coverage of NFL games that your worthless husband will never have to miss a touchdown again, even in mid-April!
RMMD: As we (hopefully) close out another Rex Morgan that started fun and dragged on in tedium way too long, let’s take one last look at Justin, who is now completely unrecognizable from the teenager we met at the beginning of the story. That operation may have made you 30 years older, Justin, but I think we’ve all grown up a litle along with you. Cheers. *sips* GLRRK!
GT: Let’s see, Gil. If Marty Moon feels disgraced or embarrassed, it’s because of the cussing, not the racism. He didn’t and still doesn’t feel any remorse about the racism. As for suspended, well, that goes away the moment he’s allowed back on the air. So you’re asking Paloma to bless the professional forgiveness of a bitter, unrepentant bigot that insulted her family and ethnic heritage for days with nary a finger lifted until he accidentally said a swear word. And now I guess Paloma is the petty, unreasonable villain of this story. This next sentence may get me pulled from the comments section by a frantic, coffee-flinging Comics Curmudgeon technician, but I’ll say it anyway: go fuck yourself, Gil Thorp.
Luann: WHAAAAAAT?! Someone dared to obliquely suggest that a 20 year old woman not be ashamed of her filthy, filthy nakedness? Luann is a good girl, not some no-clothes whore like the rest of the painted skin-showing harlots out there! How dare he?! Oh, he just meant she could learn to draw, too? Don’t know how that came up naturally, but whew, okay.
Jesus wept. You know what strip treats romantic interest and such with more maturity than this? Among nearly all of them, Marvin. That’s right, even an unfunny comic about infant bowel movements is less sexually-repressed than Luann.
Gil Thorp-“Not to me. I want Marty Moon dead and his head mounted on my wall.”
FC- And Jesus asked “Did the boy stop at Mort’s Delicatessen to pick up something to go with the loaves of bread? Maybe some pastrami or lean corned beef? Seriously, I’d kill for a reuben right about now”
@Dennis Jimenez:
“Okay who had the roast beef?”
GA: I’m not entirely sure who Paris Hilton is, but I’m sure not going to look her up after seeing THIS strip. I have suffered enough.
@Ukulele Ike: I thought it was pectin or agar and simple syrup.
MT: Did the ostrich eat Jim’s sleeve?
MT: Now that the animals are all rounded up, Dusty came out of hiding. Mark really needs a vacation away from all these losers.
MARVIN: Not a p**p joke, but not funny either.
@Liam: 11 roast beef, one water, 1 pulled pork….
@Kemal Ataboy: This must be why we hear more about the delights of Turkish Baths than Turkish Showers.
@Ukulele Ike: No, there’s no gelation in Turkish Delight. You’re thinking of marshmallows. Yummy, yummy marshmallows.
@Peanut Gallery: “Gelation”? I’m sorry. I was busy thinking about marshmallows.
@Northernlurker:
I suspect you’re thinking of Marvin’s cousin (the one who was adopted). When my brain starts to get too full, I hope I can delete knowledge of Marvin canon.
Saturday’s Nancy was legitimately funny, and the art looked better. (The previous couple of days were just blah.) I still find the new adult characters a little jarring, style-wise (they don’t quite match the legacy characters), but okay fine.
MW:
Iris: “And I’m here to buy glasses, because obviously I don’t see too well if I think you look good. What, this isn’t an optician’s? God, I really need glasses.”
MT:
I always wondered what the “ripped” look they talked about was and how one got it.
Now I know.
Turkish delight is kind of like Christmas fruitcake, people either like it or hate it, no in betweens. One time a patient of a dentist that I worked for came back from a trip to Turkey. She gave every employee a box of Turkish delights. Some of my coworkers tossed their box in the trash.
@Guillermo el chiclero: Giving Turkish deligjt to a dentist? Isn’t that a bit like giving chicken fried steak with country gravy to a cardiologist or cheesecake to a dietician?
@111 Poteet:
It’s the reason Tiffany calls herself “Sheraton St. Louis”.
Possible this Gasoline Alley dude is planning some sort of mop-based sex tape. “Where is Paris Hilton when you need her? Some guys get Kim Kardashian, I get this clown!”
@Jeffery Lindholm: Well, I was completely unaware of the mopping-on-a-Segway thing, but that makes it a little better than “Jim Scancarelli was aware of Paris Hilton in 2007 when this story first ran.”