Mary Worth, 6/26/18
Iris is right to be worried about guys who rush in, Tommy! Remember when she first moved to Charterstone and some guy made an overture at her at a pool party, and then after one date (if you can call it a date when you bring your daughter along with you) he was all like “I think the lady and I are going to be spending a lot of time together, mu ha ha ha!” and then one thing leads to another and suddenly he’s lurking in the bushes furiously wondering “Is he a professional? Or into illegal activities?” Anyway, take it slow is what we’re trying to get at, buddy!
Beetle Bailey, 6/26/18
It’s easy to project onto Beetle a a vague anti-militaristic sentiment, just because he seems so very uninterested in performing his duties as a soldier, but it turns out he loves the idea of bombing cities into rubble! Doesn’t feel any moral twinges about it at all! He’s just extremely lazy.
Dagwood definitely just agreed to have his organs harvested, right? Anyway, joke’s on Mr. Dithers or whoever had their eyes on his healthy young heart and liver: everything in his body cavity is like 90 percent deli meat at this point.