Dick Tracy, 9/25/21
Oh, huh, I guess the guy in the Ace of Spades outfit isn’t actually the first guy to wear the Ace of Spades outfit, and that apparently the reason the Ace of Spades outfit involves a mask is that the original guy had a huge “A” in the middle of his forehead. This is profoundly uninteresting to me, it turns out, but I guess we’re going to watch Dick try to puzzle all these questions out when he could just USE DIET SMITH’S TIME-DRONE TO ZOOM IN ON THE EXACT MOMENT OF THE MURDER AND SOLVE IT WITHOUT ANY EFFORT, god, Dick, do I have to think of everything for you????
Mary Worth, 9/25/21
“[adorable French accent] Oh ho ho! This Weelbur, he seems to think that he can threaten me with ‘arm! Fortunately, eet is very obvious that I would defeat him in either a battle of physical prowess or a contest of weets! The game is afoot, mon frère! ‘Bring eet on,’ as you say in this county!”
Beetle Bailey, 9/25/21
Years ago, when I first started this blog, one of my running bits was that Beetle and Sarge were lovers in a tempestuous, sometimes violent relationship, but I dropped that because it got old after a while. And really, when you think about it, friendships can be just as intense as romantic relationships, right? A guy saying “my mother never shoved a fist in my face” while the guy who just shoved his fist in his face watches him walk away with crossed arms is just as grim even if they aren’t sleeping each other, in my opinion.