Gil Thorp, 7/5/23
Ahh, there’s nothing like waking up on a fine summer morning, picking up the morning dead tree paper, and seeing the banner headline that your hated rival was not only fired but escorted off the field by a police officer. Gil is too “old school” to have already learned this via Marty Moon’s podcast or TikTok or whatever like everyone else did, so this is a pretty great way for him to start the day. It’s nice that the paper reminded Gil that he also won a championship himself, in case he forgot.
Mary Worth, 7/5/23
Welp, Greta’s been reunited with Saul and a large steak, so I guess all’s well that ends well! We know that Greta had been held captive by evil Lyle Lovett, but Mary and Saul definitely don’t, and I think it’s very funny that they just assumed, based on some dramatic local news reporting, that a nervous dachshund in a bow tie managed to successfully escape an evil underground dogfighting ring, when the much more probable explanation is that she just wandered off when Saul wasn’t looking and temporarily got lost.
Rex Morgan, M.D., 7/5/23
TIRED: The weird adult-teens of Glenwood finally graduating from high school
WIRED: The idiot citizens of Glenwood blowing off several fingers, much to Rex’s disgust
Hi and Lois, 7/5/23
Not sure how I feel about Trixie transitioning from “Trixie, the baby who talks to the sun” to “Trixie, the baby who can’t wait to show off her hot beach bod … just like her mom.”