Mostly soapy Tuesday
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Judge Parker, 4/22/25
Wow, Sophie, remember when one of your friends got mildly kidnapped back when you were a tween, and you got all revved up about the idea of the kidnappers getting killed by a CIA missile drone because wars interest you? Now you can’t even handle watching one little murder on some grainy footage from a commercial drone. College really has made you soft.
Rex Morgan, M.D., 4/22/25
Huh, I have vague memories of Rex seeing a patient a few months back and saying “Welp, looks like you’re dying, so I don’t see much point in drawing out your visit, my staff will give you the relevant paperwork,” but I don’t seem to have mentioned it on my blog, so, good subtle world-building, Rex Morgan, M.D.! Speaking of subtlety, I like the composition of this panel: Summer and Auggie standing, anxious at being in the presence of an admitted killer, while said killer was like “Say, that looks like a comfy chair to plop down into while I wait for the cops to come and take my terminally ill ass to prison … don’t mind if I do!”
The Phantom, 4/22/25
Wow, we really are still talking about the Mozz Prophecy/”Death of the Phantom” arc that’s been happening on and off but mostly on for eight years now, wild stuff. At least we’re carrying on the beloved Phantom tradition of the Ghost Who Bathes carrying on plot-important conversations with his wife while enjoying a steamy natural water feature while fully nude.
Dennis the Menace, 4/22/25
Not sure if either the traditional “Civilization was smashed and Europe was plunged into a thousand years of barbarian darkness” or the more nuanced “In Italy in particular, Roman civilization outlived the Roman state and was transformed in an evolutionary way rather than being snuffed out” answers are even slightly appropriate for kindergartners here, but that’s very clearly some kind of tourist guidebook the teacher is holding rather than anything educational, so maybe this lesson is about how there are cheap airfares to Italy during the winter and the weather is still fine for walking around the city most days, so that’s why you all had a substitute teacher for most of February.
114 replies to “Mostly soapy Tuesday”
DtM: Teachers don’t really wear little name tags like that, do they? The school brought in a rep from a travel agency, didn’t they? I smell kickback!
Dennis the Menace: With all the cuts to education, is it any wonder “Ethnic Day” is being taught by a food service worker who doesn’t have time to change into her uniform-with-nametag before her Pop’s Genuine Italian Pizza shift?
Who the hell is this non-union Margaret in Dennis’s class? Do legacy strip characters have contract negotiations that can go south?
MW: This would be a good time for, “If anything happens to me, SHE did it.”
RMMD: See, this right here is why I hate drop-ins.
DtM: While I can’t help but think that Dennis thoroughly enjoyed learning about the Roman Empire (Caligula, of course) his answer is perfectly age-appropriate.
RMMD: “So you see, Rex’s half-assed doctoring produces terminally ill vigilantes who hunt stalkers. Therefore technically, on a utilitarian reckoning, Rex’s methods actually increase the net good in the world. And that’s why the medical malpractice suit against my client should be dismissed.”
DtM: This is why you don’t hire kindergarten teachers from the r/RETVRN subreddit.
Modern patriots might be focused on the Latino or Asian threat, but Dennis is set in the 1950s, so it’s focused on the wop menace of the mob, Popery and food with garlic
“How bad were the education cuts?”
“Well, we can still afford a map of Italy, but not the entire boot. We cannot include the North, so we will have to cut around Tuscany”
For those more accustomed to counting in freedom units, 41°C water is HOT. It is in fact just a hair below the point where your flesh starts cooking and blood turns to the consistency of boiled eggs. But what can you do about such a fantastically convenient naturally steaming waterfall in your ancient cave, ha ha.
I see that public school is still spouting the German propaganda that Rome ended with Romulus Augustulus, instead of continuing for another thousand years in Constantinople! That’s because of woke!
DtM: Most professional comedians have a writing partner, a person who may contribute a large share to the comic’s routine but is never seen in public. Just saying if he wants to succeed in today’s world, Dennis might want to update from Wilson’s vaudeville-based routines.
“I am dying anyway, so it costs me nothing to do some dirty work for you. No problem, really! Do you have a neighbour who occupies your parking spot? I can key their car!”
RMMD: “Of course I remember you! You strangled our candy striper.”
CS: So why was Pam blankly staring at her hands yesterday? No reason worth mentioning. But i’m going to assume she murdered Crankshaft, until the strip says otherwise. Today, Jeff gets the good idea that they should be seen in public before the body is found.
A map of Italy that excludes Milan, Venice, Sicily and Sardinia: pretty menacing. Standing up so fast that your chair flies off-panel: also menacing.
DtM:
“What came after the fall of Rome?”
“Neighboring communities in upstate New York recoiled.”
JP – When you’re in trouble and the crumbling institutions of the good ol’ USA can’t help, you need the Death Wish-ilizer….
RMMD – It was bad news, alright – they no longer take the Death Wish-ilizer Local 761 reciprocity card in lieu of payment….
Phantom – What did the Mozz Prophecy say about getting a blowjob in a subterranean waterfall….
DtM – What a silly answer – everyone knows it was the rape of the Sabine women….
Adios Amigos, DJ.
DtM:
“I sure am glad you and I didn’t have the cafeteria treats that the rest of the class did, Miss Crabtree. As you can see, they’re all in anaphylactic shock!”
The Phantom: Aspirin? Well, stick it out the waterfall, maybe it’ll cool off a bit.
RMMD:
“Turns out ‘Doctor’ Morgan isn’t a doctor after all, Ms. Knight. He’s got more ‘quack’ in him than the AFLAC duck!”
Luann: WTF? Did the parents take all the food with them for sustenance during their weeklong trek to Wherever? Did they also leave word with all the local markets and stores not to sell ‘the kids’ any junk food?
Crankshaft: What’s worse than Batiuk trying to write existential ennui? Batiuk trying to write two adults wanting to get frisky…
FG: Nice two days of body language from the mind-swapped duo (Flash’s body all cringy; Dale’s all fisty). But we’ve come to expect that Schkrade is really good at his job.
Blondie: He better hope Dawn Weston doesn’t drop in for lunch.
BF: Are we getting a full week of dweeby Blonde Friend in bed? I want to meet Benoit’s half-crazed vengeful French/Canadian daughter!
Crank: OOOOOOOOO a NEW movie at the mall! Not to the CRAPPY theater for Episode Seven of “Rocket Ranger Rick Battles the Pink Robots.”
RMMD: See Jack Ritchie’s classic 1960 short story, “For all the Rude People,” in which the protagonist learns he’ll be dead of cancer in six months and devotes the rest of his life to shooting assholes.
MW – Ew. Cathy has Barney Rubble peasant feet.
Which biz are you talking about?
Which biz are you talking about?
Which biz are you talking about?
Which biz are you talking about
JP: I wouldn’t have thought it possible to make a complaint as valid as “you made me witness a murder” sound whiny and entitled, but here we are.
MW: Is Brigman slowly forgetting how to draw the human form? First Dawn’s increasingly tiny hands, then whatever’s going on with Belle’s torso every time she’s sitting on Wilbur’s couch, and now what even are Cathy’s proportions? Also, who was this panel drawn for, foot fetishists?
Which biz are you talking about?
I owe a lot to that joke. My cousin Sheryl told it to me (Woman sees her bus and rushes out of the drug store, forgetting her bottle of aspirin. On the bus, she remembers and says, “Oh my ass burns,” to which the driver replies, “Stick it out the window and let it cool off.”)
I thought it was so funny that I told my dad who, though probably amused, had to act stern. He wanted to know where I heard this and I told him and soon my cousin Sheryl had her ass burning. (Yes, at age 7 or so, I was a narc.)
When I was about 11, I was assigned to read to the third-graders while their teachers went on break. It meant I had to give up recess to do this and was told I was picked for this special assignment because I was responsible. One day the little bastards were rowdy and I said I’d tell them a joke if they’d settle down. I told them the Ass Burns joke. They thought it was hilarious, but they didn’t settle down. However, they did tell their teacher about the joke I told them. The shit hit the fan, and I was taken off reading duty and got to go back to having recess.
A valuable life lesson learned in the third grade: Antisocial behavior does pay.
Thanks for the memory, Handsome Harry.
Mr. Cthulhu, Sir, you ask me, Just how square is Dennis the Menace? So square the beatific teachers have rectangular halos!
The Phantom: Given how inseparable Darling is from his spandex-and-lycra purple outfit, I’d have assumed he was a never-nude, but it sure looks like he’s showing Mrs. Phantom the big picture, if you know what I mean.
@Amelie Wikström: Oh, please. It’s nowhere near that bad. It’s the temp of a hot summer day, and just enough above body temperature to make for a comfortable shower. The real problem here is that DePaul is going to pan away where Brooke would zoom in.
Phantom: Clearly they were drawn nekkid and had the blue lines scrawled over afterward, when Manley had had a wank. Now, is that an icy cold shower, or does Kit just have a very small dick?
Phantom: “Darling, I know you face whatever may come, that’s your way” is the most stilted compliment on a partner’s oral sex skills I’ve ever read.
Judge Parker: “Fine. Fine. I’ll say what you think you want to hear, but you’ll hate it and get upset I’m even saying it. Randy’s corrupt up to his eyeballs, so’s my boyfriend, you’re a terrible lawyer, and Abbey should just accept that she’s going gray and stop dyeing her hair bubblegum pink. Are you happy now?!”
DtM: Our Gang originated this trope and they did it so much better.
Miss Crabtree: Uh-Huh, use the word ‘isthmus’ in a sentence.
Uh-Huh: Isthmus be my lucky day!
Miss Crabtree: Farina, what was Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address?
Farina: 6854 Main Street!
@richardf8: Hey now, if Swedes (Norwegians?) are anything like the English, the idea of a shower warmer than ice cubes is anathema.
JP: Looks like Sophie’s parents managed to upset her in spite of their best efforts to keep her calm, like taking her out to the pinkest restaurant in town. Does this place exclusively serve rosé and strawberry shortcake?
RMMD: “Sorry, I have to ask: is that a polyvinyl ceiling cover with an orange peel finish? So nice, can’t keep my eyes off it…”
Ph: I mean, I guess that looks ok. It’s hard to imagine exactly how it would feel. Wait, 41 degrees? Centigrade? Oh man, that is sweet. I am there!
DtM: I know that the unification of Italy was complicated affair, but I think by the time Dennis was in school they had managed to secure Sicily and Lombardy…
On the corner of 69th Street – speaking of which, Miss Crabtree . . .
@richardf8: Have you tested the temperature of a comfortable shower? I don’t think it’s as hot as you think. And on summer days that hot, people usually want to get into water that’s cooler than the air to escape.
JP: Is this really an appropriate time for Abbey to be practicing her mime skills?
While the remains of the once-mighty Roman Empire struggles to fight off the barbarian hordes, and the barbarians fight for the iron throne of the legacy of Rome and supremacy across the Europe it once dominated, all their fights for power and glory are immaterial, for winter is coming.
Ph – Narration box’s use of the term “Centigrade” just seems so . . . retrograde.
DTM: Based on the name tag and uniform, I think that is an actual flight attendant giving a presentation. That would explain the brochure. All of the kids are going to get a packet to take home to their parents.
Curtis – quick websearch finds bacon-flavoured toothpaste and bacon-scented deodorant, taking this zero-joke strip into negative-humour territory
I can believe Luann never bothers to check the fridge, and wouldn’t even have a clue about its stock because she’d never grab a healthy snack from the fruit drawer or help with meal prep, but Bernice?
@Amelie Wikström: We’re talking 105F. So yes. People don’t like weather that warm, but it won’t do those things you said to the blood and skin.
Any reference to Rome in DtM should include a hint that Dennis sees Nero as a role model. Our overalls-wearing protagonist has the makings of a tyrant who craves not merely power but also chaos. He’ll grow up to play shred guitar while the world burns.
DtM: If you read it like an Italian opera with teach and Dennis singing their lines, the corny response is more forgiving.
You try a comeback that fits three beats of a timpani, laments Dennis.
PH – according to my ThermPro, the water at temp to switch from pouring down to start the shower is 42C. 45-46C feels a *little* hot.
At least we have a natural explanation for the Phantom’s apparent lack of offspring – his sperm cannot survive the regular exposure to water at that temperature.
The DeGroot grownups took the time to throw away every jar of mustard, fruit preserves, pickles, giardiniera, stick of butter, yogurt container, and bottle of salad dressing before their week’s departure just so the girls could be confronted by a completely empty refrigerator. It takes dedication and hard work to be an absolute shit.
“RETVRN,” Dennis shouts, “Rome never fell, it was betrayed! Down with the weak Byzantines and effete Easterners!”
Menacing.
The Phantom: Hot sexy nude bathing and the Phantom somehow manages to kill the mood.
RMMD-Every news from Rex Morgan is bad news.
“So I figured that making my way through the courts to a date with a lethal injection needle will be quicker and less painful than dealing with Doc Morgan and this vaguely ominous health news.”
***
Why is a teacher wearing a name tag? Wait. They’ve finally institutionalized Dennis, haven’t they?
MW: It’s nice to see that even Dawn’s friends are bored with her bullshit. Little boy who cried wolf and whatnot.
@pugfuggly: “Does this place exclusively serve rosé and strawberry shortcake?”
Now let’s forget our troubles with a big bowl of strawberry ice cream!!
Judge Parker – Sophie would never make it as a researcher for Wikileaks if she cannot handle some leaked state-sanctioned murder footage.
Rex Morgan, MD – What we lost in the cat-and-mouse game of hunting a mysterious murder of a dangerous stalker will turn into a long, tedious court case where the family of the stalker sues Rex Morgan for his bedside matter leading to hopeless patient turning to murder.
Dennis the Menace – Dennis’ teacher is just upholding a long-held tradition – not shutting up about the trip you took to Rome. Let’s hope she keeps it G rated and leaves her encounter with the charismatic Vespa-driving Paolo, full of vigor and machismo, to the teacher’s lounge or her adult friends.
What’s the over/under on when Luann and Bernice each attempt to kill the other for meat?
What came after the fall of Rome is that the Eastern Roman Empire continued calling itself Rome and lasted over a thousand years longer, that’s what happened.
@Philip: With my sixth grade teacher, it was Egypt.
The geothermal waterfall camber of Skull Cave . . . 410 degrees Centigrade
A cut-off scream, then hissing
What do you mean, the boiling point of liquid phosphorus? That’s crazy, I didn’t type an extra . . . zero . . . ahem . . . Suddenly, Mozz’s prophecy came true!
@astroboy:
Miss Crabtree: “Class, can anyone use the word ‘Rotterdam’ in a sentence?”
DtM: “My neighbor Margaret has a bad case of poison ivy, and I wish it would Rotterdam leg off!”
My niece told me her middle-school class had a semester where they studied Italy, and she got a gold star! I said, “Molto bene!” and she said, “…what?”
“Studying Italy” turns out to be the Colosseum, Leaning Tower of Pisa, and spaghetti. Not even “mangia!”. And she lives in North Jersey. I mean, *I* picked up this stuff.
RMMD – Augie, when someone is confessing a murder to you and explaining that he doesn’t mind going to prison because he’s terminally ill and has nothing to live for anyway, it’s common courtesy to remove your earbuds.
CS: Pam and Jeff are going to neck in the theater.
GT: Ha haaa, now Keri’s being reprimanded for calling her “Mom” when she’s clearly identifying as “Coach.”
RMMD: “Hey, if you two want to screw on the couch or something, don’t mind me.”
JP: Sophie, can you please stop droning on about this?!?
RMMD: Isn’t this the origin story for Jigsaw? It’s too bad we didn’t get to see this guy’s boring traps.
JP: Abbey knows how to get through unpleasant conversations: beige wine and plenty of it.
RMMD: Cut! We’re going to have to do this scene again. We’re getting quite a shine on the kid’s left ear. Lighting, can we fix that?
Phantom: Centigrade? That’s commie talk. What’s next? Kilometers? Universal health care?
DTM: Notice how one of Dennis’ purple classmates is enjoying this little scene. “Okay, the blond kid seems determined to drive our teacher to madness with his devastating comebacks. And I’m here for it!”
Don Abundio, translated:
“You’re having problems with your jukebox?”
“Yes. You look like an ice cream salesman”
“I know, just humor me”
“It’s getting great distance, but the aim is all over the place”
MW: Dawn, you shouldn’t take advice from someone who paints her toes, not just the nails.
FC: “You wouldn’t like Daddy when he’s hangry!”
Dustin: You’ve had years and years of verbal abuse, you finally get your chance, and this is the best you could come up with, “hurr hurr, yer forehead.”
9CL: For today’s lesson let’s practice drawing hands. Contrive a scenario where you can draw lots of hands.
JP: “Please Sophie, I didn’t know there was murder footage on that drone! I mean sure, I was hoping there was, but that’s not the same thing!”
RMMD: Remember, kids, vigilante justice is okay if you’re terminally ill! Justice Wargrave had the right idea!
DT: Sadly disappointing that Uncle had laid a paper trail up to the point he would have been supposedly missing, then allow his card to be used by some vagrant thereby making it seem it was stolen or lost. It would have kept the MCU busy chasing down leads and the Itemizer would have additional charges for photocopying the various receipts.
MW: Is this an example of irony in comics? We know that Bats isn’t just unfriendly she has homicidal intent, but little Wilbur is still leading Wilbur’s brain around. At least Dawn at some primitive reptilian brainstem level senses the presence of a threat.
RMMD: At some point, the police will take notice that the Morgan Clinic is a site that draws in susceptible people and makes them into vigilantes. Like the villain in Agatha Christies novel, Curtain, Rex and June set up events that manipulate otherwise rational people and turn them into killers.
@richardf8: Not a 42° air temperature, no. It’s not enough to heat the meat to its temperature in the space of one day. Sitting in a waterfall with hot water pouring over you for a longer period could be dangerous though.
Luann: Ha! Frank and Nancy are forcing Luann and Bernice to forage for food. They will certainly die, probably 15 feet away from a Publix.
CS: They’re not going to the Valentine (or whatever it is call now)?!? Jeff has been replaced by a pod person!
9CL: Geez, Lolly, why don’t you get your own boyfriend with whom you can make out on Seth’s couch?!?
@SteverinoCT: Yeah, the Fall of Rome is pretty weighty subject matter for whatever early elementary grade Dennis is supposed to be in. Maybe the teachers figure these kids ought to get an early start on learning what life is like in a decadent collapsing empire?
What came after the fall of Rome? Well it seems they just built Naples or maybe Salerno in its place, if we go by your map of Maybe-a-Third-of-Italy or whatever was salvaged when they terminated the Department of Education.
@Pozzo: Because schools these days have security protocols reminiscent of a minimum security prison, teachers do wear ID badges–but they’re almost always those credit-card sized deals that double as a key card and that you hang from a clip or lanyard, not a clip-on tag like you find in service industry hell jobs.
JP – Why does that guy continue to refer to her as a second-year college student?
Luann-It’s funny because they don’t know how to shop or cook or even order takeout.
Phantom: According to the Consumer Product Safety Commission, : “Hot tub water temperatures should never exceed 104 degrees Fahrenheit. A temperature of 100 degrees is considered safe for a healthy adult.” The reason for this warning is that water temperatures of more than 40 degrees Celsius can lead to heatstroke. OK, that warning was issued in 1980, but apparently it’s still in effect. Hot tubs and spas are subject to Underwriters Laboratories (UL) controlling document UL #1563. Here is section 32 of that document, which covers Temperature Regulating Controls:
32.2 – The temperature regulating control shall be adjustable and shall have marked settings, but it shall not have any settings marked hotter than 40 °C (104 °F).
UL has strongly advised that any hot tub or spa manufacturer that produces a control, or modifies a standard control, to exceed 104 °F is in violation of their UL listing and can have their listing pulled by UL.
CS: Tomorrow we see Jeff’s rictus-faced inner child watching them from the end of the bed.
Pibgorn: It’s been 256 days since the last installment. Presumably, the schtupping continues.
Bizarro: Let me just say – our featured Crustacean, Larry, does NOT have a cord stuck into any posterior orifice! That is just a trick of prop placement, intended to show him as the subject of a surrealist pun. A bit of a stretch, but in this economy of comic cutbacks, sometimes choices have to be made. This gig is far better than that offer of “dinner guest at The Phantom Cave after a hot shower”….
RMMD: “Yeah, I remember you. We have the CAT scan of your liver posted on the wall of the break room, and we’re running a pool on how long you’ve got left! If you croak two weeks from tomorrow, I stand to win $32.50!”
PBS: This seems wildly inaccurate.
Dennis the Menace: Ooh, sorry Dennis, the answer we were looking for was “Augustine of Hippo wrote De civitate Dei, then died during a Vandal siege of his city.”
C’shaft: Look, I’m not saying that late middle-aged couples cannot have a robost sex life. I’m saying that this particular middle-aged couple should never, ever engage in anything more suggestive than friendly pat on the shoulder, certainly not in public and probably not in private either.
DT: If you’re using your homeless doppleganger to fake your death so you can collect your own life insurance*, and you’re supposed to be away on business while all this is going down, wouldn’t you at least make some charges for a business trip on your card, if not take the trip yourself? I think the dumb nephews come by it honestly.
*I think that’s what’s happening here. Is that what’s happening here? This whole situation is perplexing, and not in an intriguing mystery way.
Dustin: Dustsis can dish it out–oh, how she can dish it out, it’s practically all she knows how to do–but she can’t take it.
GT: You’d think Keri would be used to calling their parents “Coach” in an athletic setting by now…
Luann: Apparently among the many, many life skills Luann has never picked up are “grocery shopping,” “ordering delivery,” and “using the drive-thru at McDonald’s.”
MT: What, you think your lunk of a husband is going to come home with a Tiffany blue box? You’ll be lucky if you get cheap Statue of Liberty earrings out of this.
MW: Belle likes Wilbur. Belle willingly and repeatedly engages in acts of physical affection with Wilbur. Belle wants Wilbur all to herself, jealous of the token gestures towards fatherhood that Wilbur displays towards Dawn. At this point, attempting to poison Dawn is the least insane of Belle’s observable behaviors.
Pluggers are so very, very lonely.
9CL: “MY boyfriend is 17 years old and HE can maintain an erection for more than ninety seconds! HAH HAH, loser!”
Judge Parker: Guys, you’re not gonna believe this, but I’m starting to think that Randy is not a very good lawyer.
Rex Morgan: Maybe the Terminally Ill Strangler should team up with that janitor vigilante from awhile back. Really put a dent in crime in this town.
The Phantom: Lord, when is this Mozz Prophecy shit gonna end? Each time I think the comic is done bringing it up, its right back in your face!
Dennis The Menace: Unfortunately for Dennis, his incorrect “funny” answer is going to get him fed to lions (mangy stray dogs dressed as lions) in the gladiatorial arena (the teacher’s backyard).
RMMD:
“Oh, by the way, while I’m confessing — and as if to put an exclamation point on my recent crime jag — I also swiped Kristi Noem‘s purse!”
@richardf8:
Was this around the time The Mummy came out?
@seismic-2: Yes, but just try a thermometer in a nice hot shower. You’re not soaking, and 41C is well below the full hot water temp for a house (looking it up, 49C in the tank seems considered the minimum standard to avoid bacterial growth). Seriously, 42C in mine makes me feel nice and warm. It’s not even heat-up-quick-after-an-icy-walk hot.
@Amelie Wikström: For those of us in Europe 41C (105F) is considered the maximum healthy shower temperature by dermatologists. Which is probably who paid for this hot spring product placement.
Dennis wasn’t being menacingly literal. He just has a poet’s heart. He knows Rome was about to enter into a dark, wintry night of the soul.
Phantom: When we think that we’re finally finished with this prophecy garbage, the next arc will introduce Old Man Mozz’s daughter “Mozzarella” who will have a different conflicting prophecy.
This cycle will never end.
MW: “Belle does make me feel uneasy! She spilled sauce on me and interrupted my karaoke duet with my dad! Also, she’s tried to kill me twice.”
Pluggers: Landline phone service doesn’t seem like something pluggers would pay for. I imagine most pluggers just have a Consumer Cellular subscription and their Nokia from 2005.
@seismic-2: They say the road to Skull Cavern is paved with the bones of CPSC inspectors.
MW: Usually, the villain, waits until AFTER she marries, before getting rid of the step-daughter.
Belle really should brush up on her fairy tales.
@seismic-2: Miss Crabtree, urinate, but you’d be a 10 if you had bigger tits.
@Banana Jr. 6000: Like with the arc introduced Eve Lourd.
“My husband kept tripping me and insulting me it was horribly traumatic boo-hoo-hoo!” -20 days later- “….oh and he tried to shoot me”
RMMD:
“It all started when he threw water on me on Dyngus Day. That led to a chill, and now to the bronchitis which I’m suffering from!”
JP:. First reading this morning Soph came off as a whiner– seeing murder of a stranger on a video shouldn’t seem personal any more. But after the life she’s lived, it could be a trigger. Remember when Grandpa had her and Ned homeless? Remember when she was captured by a crazy relative and kept in a hole? These permanently changed her brain.
I had to repeatedly watch video of a murder last fall, and it shook me tho I’ve seen similar killings for decades. Some just get to you. And the young are especially vulnerable.
MW: Wilbur’s “superpower” is his rude clumsiness inadvertently saving people. Dawn’s “superpower” is to sense danger but only be able to phrase it in the most idiotic way possible.
@erdmann:
“Pibgorn: It’s been 256 days since the last installment. Presumably, the schtupping continues.”
Pibgorn is a dead comic walking ever since the archives were put behind a paywall. Any Pibgorn fan who wants to read the strip has only the August 2024 installment available without having to write a check first.
Phantom: It’s great that most are ignoring the gratuitous nudity and focusing instead on optimal shower temperatures! This is a classy and knowledgeable group!
9CL – Twin #1 is making out with Sweater Vest Middle-Age-Gut Man on the couch. Twin #2 sneaks down to watch. Twin #1 notices and pushes her away.
I just wonder how long Middle Aged Silver Fox is going to remain a character in the strip. The 50 year age gap is going to be a challenge for his relationship, and presumably there is at least one male left in Manhattan who is under retirement age for Twin #1 to frot with while fully clothed on the couch.
@Myrtle: Nudity-schmudity, let’s argue plumbing!
@Yesyouar ghbc ch jj hjfhjn: Dude, like chill!
Aside from Dawn’s wording making her sound like a whiny child with an Electra complex, Cathy (Ack!) has stopped taking Dawn seriously ever since the cute guy she shared a lab with suddenly had an outbreak of “cold sores” just a week after she told Dawn about him.
Luann: If this story ends with Luann and Puddles stripping the last shards of flesh from Bernice’s bones I’ll take back everything bad I’ve said about this strip.
Luann: Big meh. Those two will just mooch free meals at the family owned Fuze for two weeks, and not even tip.
@Ukulele Ike: #33: Yes, but was Manley wanking to nekkid Diane or nekkid Kit?
@Philip: That version? You flatter me! It was around the time the Tutankhamen exhibited debuted at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. That was our big field trip. Oh, and she was an aviatrix, so there were lots of aerial photographs of the pyramids in her vacation photos.
RMMD – Last week, with the cop questioning the guy who slept on Summer’s couch (can’t be bothered to look up his name) about the murder, it looked like an interesting plot could be developing.
Whew! That was close!
Rex Morgan – I thought it was terrible when St. Lisa’s doctor misfiled her test results, but Rex gave this patient the correct diagnosis and then hustled him out the door.
I don’t remember this guy in Rex’s office – it didn’t involve roots country, so I didn’t dream that it might be relevant later.
JP – I thought that Genius Sophie was upset because Sam asked her to tamper with evidence. I was wrong and stand corrected. The illegal part wasn’t an issue. Sophie’s fee fees were hurt because she saw a recording of a murder. This is Sophie we’re talking about. I remember the previous drone incident, but I had forgotten that she was interested in war. Now suddenly she’s Ms Sensitivity. An entitled brat does not change that much.
Pluggers – No, he also gets calls from his many doctors’ offices reminding him of appointments. And from car warranty companies. Not to mention calls telling him that his Social Security number was compromised.
It’s more likely that the pharmacy texts him about his prescriptions, and they’re the only texts he receives.
FC – Does anyone “go on a diet” any more?