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Archive: Beetle Bailey

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Can’t stop staring at that blatantly traced grill

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Blondie and Hi and Lois, 5/20/23

As a participant in the childfree lifestyle, I appreciate what representation I can find in the comics, even if it’s just Dagwood and Blondie’s best only friends Herb and Tootsie, or Hi and Lois’s best friends Hi’s coworker Thirsty and his wife Irma, who they keep at arm’s length. Anyway, Thirsty has at least come round to his opinion on procreation based on hard experience over a too-short fence, whereas Herb seems to be guessing at “parenting” activities based on movies he saw 20 years ago.

Judge Parker, 5/20/23

Oh, right, remember Eric, the traumatized son of the murderous meth judge? Well, his dad went to jail and now he’s living with Abbey, or maybe with Abbey’s horses. Abbey has been “feeling lost” ever since her dumb business venture, her political career, and her marriage all failed, but she has an idea, if Sophie is willing the help! (The idea is using Eric and Sophie to breed a new “master race” of weird sad foundling kids who ended up on Abbey’s ranch for whatever reason.)

Beetle Bailey, 5/20/23

OK, so the bad news is that we’re fighting another war, but the good news is that after like 70-plus years, the military has determined that Beetle is finally adequately trained to fight in it.

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Several opinions from Josh about comic strips

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Beetle Bailey, 5/19/23

It is of course a long-established joke in Beetle Bailey that Sarge is a cartoonish glutton, but every once in a while they also do a joke that he’s a cartoonish drunk. I feel like these are different things! I’m not here to either defend or disparage Sgt. Orville Snorkel, his appetites are between him and his God and his chain of command, I just feel like we’re expected to think of the boozing and the eating as part of the same thing, and I feel like they are in fact different things.

Gasoline Alley, 5/19/23

The current Gasoline Alley storyline is about how Rufus has a real bad head injury, and, maybe this is just me, but I think it should be more obvious when one of your characters has a real bad head injury. Like, they should be acting a lot more differently than they usually do than Rufus is here. Just my take.

Shoe, 5/19/23

As you can imagine, I’ve given some thought about the most succinct way I could describe each and every one of the comics I read and review for this site, and I think my current take on Shoe is “All the birds are very depressed.”

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Monday madness

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Shoe, 4/10/23

I joke about goggle eyes of horror a lot on this site in regards to Shoe but here’s an instance when they’re absolutely justified. Why on earth would you start a conversation like this? Why are you going around springing little “I can’t operate on this man … he’s my son!” riddles on people without their consent? Roz is just trying to supply everyone with passable diner food and make just enough conversation so they don’t feel lonely, so why would you do this to her? It’s unconscionable!

Mary Worth, 4/10/23

I was going to go on a riff about how Estelle’s going to be “getting her hands dirty” all right, once she starts having to euthanize animals, but then I caught glimpse of her eyes in the second panel. That’s a lady who got to her volunteer gig this morning and immediately started enjoying the massive amounts of horse tranquilizer that Dr. Ed keeps on hand at the vet clinic (a vet clinic that does not now and has never in the past treated horses).

Beetle Bailey, 4/10/23

You ever think that Beetle Bailey just might kind of want to die? Would explain a lot!