Archive: Blondie

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Mary Worth, 5/10/19

Aw, isn’t that sweet! Mary has decided to bring her former cat Libby a tuna casserole, and has to make a pro forma offer to share with Estelle, the human who agreed to contain Libby’s allergy-prompting dander in her apartment so as not to damper on Mary’s sex life. Sadly, Estelle is now feral with grief and isolation after spending weeks alone in her darkened apartment, so she lunges at Mary, desperate for human contact. And this, if I’m reading the angles here properly, is about to result in a tray full of gooey, piping-hot casserole hurled skyward, only to flop down on Mary and Estelle and inflict delicious second degree burns onto their faces. Libby will be happily eating tuna casserole off the floor long after Mary and Estelle have been taken to the hospital.

Blondie, 5/10/19

Gotta love how Dagwood doesn’t really have a sense of aesthetics or joy in watching a man practice his craft or anything like that. His favorite part is when they take it out of the oven, because that’s the part right before he gets to eat it. He wants to eat it. He needs to eat it. He hungerssssssss

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Mark Trail, 5/6/19

Yeah, off the top of my head, it could mean that you’re not in the valley you think you’re in, which means that you’re lost in an arid, hostile environment; or that you’ve time-travelled hundreds of thousands of years into the future, leaving behind everything you’ve ever known and possibly arriving to a world where humanity itself has ceased to exist. Either way, it seems pretty not great!

Blondie, 5/6/19

Based on everyone’s body language in panel two, the “best dream ever” Dagwood had was 100% a sex dream, right?

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Blondie, 3/15/19

How old do you think Dagwood Bumstead is? In one sense, he was born already an adult when the comic strip Blondie debuted in 1930 and is thus somewhere in his 110s, older than just about any adult alive and reading about his day-to-day antics is; but in another sense, he has two teenage children and is of working age in the year 2019, so he’s probably no older than his mid 50s and could be as young as his late 30s. Anyway, what I’m trying to say is, despite the fact that all of us have only known Dagwood as an adult our whole lives and therefore think of him as “older than us,” the word “dope” has been used as a positive adjective in the sense depicted here for nearly 40 years! C’mon, man.

Mary Worth, 3/15/19

You ever notice that we’d never seen Mary’s “old friend” Estelle until she foisted Libby onto her because she realized that she couldn’t continue to play whatever cruel long-running emotional game she’s playing with Dr. Jeff if he couldn’t hang out at her apartment? She’d never spent time with Estelle socially before and I’m pretty sure she only drops by her apartment now so she can get some Libby time in. If Estelle were explaining in rapturous detail that all Arthur needs to wrap up his construction job in Malaysia was her social security number and a certified copy of her birth certificate, Mary would just mutter “I’m happy for you, my friend!” while getting just enough cat dander on her clothes to keep Jeff off-balance the next time he comes to visit.