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Crankshaft, 10/29/08

Good lord, is there a more menacing sight than Crankshaft’s hateful old face framed by a sinister black cloud rolling in from nowhere? This is no mere cantankerous old grump; he’s clearly some kind of winter-demon, determined to turn our beautiful country into an icy hell to inspire what passes for delight in his frozen lump of heart by calling down all manner of sleet and snow with his dark powers. Expect our frigid nightmare to continue until the ’Shaft decides that scorching summer heat might provide a better backdrop to his cranky, malapropistic wit.

Hi and Lois, 10/29/08

Sure, laugh all you want at Hi for not trying to use any search terms that might actually be helpful — the gentleman’s home town, his job, that sort of thing — but in his defense, sharing that sort of information is really frowned upon at anonymous sex parties, which I suppose is why they call them anonymous sex parties.

Ziggy, 10/29/08

It seems like there’s a sub-prime joke here trying to get out, but heck, let’s give the comic credit for trying. Ha ha, Ziggy’s flower is dying!

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Hi and Lois, 10/28/08

Did you ever come to believe that Hi Flagston was actually a full-on delusional lunatic, that he spent his days in some kind of locked asylum for the incurably mentally ill, and that his wife and children were mere figments of his imagination? If so, your suspicions might be confirmed by today’s strip, in which Hi asks Mr. Foofram to say hello to his daughter, while holding a small desk-sized speaker that’s tethered by a string to a box of the sort that a necktie might come in. (Another hint: he believes that his “boss” is named “Mr. Foofram.”)

Apartment 3-G, 10/28/08

To deliver the raw emotional intensity required in panel three, Apartment 3-G spared no expense, bringing in special guest star Bea Arthur to play the part of Blaze.

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Slylock Fox, 10/20/08

Dirty Dog is wearing some kind of anteater costumer that compresses his jaw forward and thrusts his sore tooth into an incredibly unnatural position, which ought by rights to be punishment enough for his bank-robbing ways.

I was about to remark that it seems strange that he would bite somebody or something during a bank robbery, but he is, after all, a dog. He probably rolled around in his own poop while he was at it.

Blondie, 10/20/08

Hey everyone, guess what the Word That We’re Going To Repeat And Emphasize Over And Over Again For No Good Reason Until It Totally Creeps You Out is?

Hi and Lois, 10/20/08

Hi and Lois were on drugs at that party, just like they are right now.