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Mary Worth, 3/6/08

Self-Satisfaction Week continues at the Charterstone Compound. “Wrong advice? Ha ha my dear, I’ll have you know I’m well-intentioned! And as someone once told me, “The road to . . . er . . . a happy outcome is paved with good intentions!”

Mark Trail, 3/6/08

Poor Johnny Malotte has had to endure a lot of exposition this week — yesterday from Mark; today from Sergeant Mountie McQueen. Fortunately none of it reaches him, aloft on his jimson-weed pinnacle of bliss: “Eez zat zo? Come, mon ami, ‘ave a word eenstaid weeth M’seiur Marc — I must return, return now to Eextlan! Oooh, look down zair — eet ees ma fran’ M’sieur ‘Awk! ‘Allo, M’sieur ‘Awk!”

For Better or For Worse, 3/6/08

OK, anybody would have to be blind not to see how this will work out. Nicely played, Warren, but wasted on Anthony — what’s left to crush?

– Uncle Lumpy

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Lots of comings and goings in the continuity strips today!

For Better or For Worse, 3/3/08

Hey, it’s Warren, the dashing helicopter pilot! He says his head’s a mess, and he’s come to Liz for clarity. Which more or less proves his point.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 3/3/08

Big Rex and Little Niki, packin’ out: no fish, but no “disappointment”, either — except for poor Rex, who faces the grim prospect of sex with his wife.

Mark Trail, 3/3/08

Recaps all ’round in Mark Trail, and good news for Johnny Malotte: with Bull dead and Luke in jail, his camp empire will span the whole of Lost Forest. “Hey, Marie, now we can have those nine other kids we always dreamed about!”

Funky Winkerbean, 3/3/08

That’s it? Two weeks of the Pizza World interview just to establish that Funky’s a dick? I’d call it a waste, but squandering two weeks of Funky Winkerbean hardly qualifies. Cue Summer Moore’s championship season — too bad there wasn’t room in panel three for Bull to tell us more about what we read in panel two. C’mon Bull, focus: which of your Westview teams is going to that championship game?

Mary Worth, 3/3/08

Pool party! Pool party! Pool party! And there’s Wilbur, and Chinbeard, and Toeby — and, and Guy on the Stairs! Oh, it’s gonna be great this time, I just know it!

But what on earth are they feeding that leprechaun? And where’s Mary’s customary glass of human blood? Never mind for now — I’m sure all will be explained in the weeks and months ahead.

Pool party! Ahhhhhhh. . . .

– Uncle Lumpy

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I thank everyone for your e-mails! You always keep me up-to-date on the latest comics-themed insanity from the dark recesses of the Web. But today there’s been such a flood on two items that I feel I should share them with the rest of you:

• We all had a good laugh at Garfield without his thoughts; but are you ready for Garfield minus Garfield? When will the nonstop abuse of poor Arbuckle end?
• Fark.com frequently has Photoshop contests, and today they launched one based on Mary Worth. Probably not safe for work, but utterly hilarious.