Mary Worth, 10/7/14
Few things have unsettled me more today than Hanna thinking to herself “My grandson is safe with his mother … for now.” What could this possibly mean? Safe from what? Is he the Chosen One of Prophecy, with a magical protection charm keeping evil at bay as long as he stays in his mother’s home? Is this why Hanna’s been so reluctant to babysit him, because while his mother’s out finding self-actualization or true love or whatever, Hanna must maintain constant vigilance against the emboldened dark forces who seek to snuff out Gordon’s life before he can come into his full powers? Probably not, and I guess we’re never going to really find out, because right in the middle of this reverie she just stone-cold rammed into the front of Ian’s car, and I assume that his condescending rage will be both extensive and hilarious.
Apartment 3-G, 10/7/14
Kudos to Margo for maintaining her utter dominance over both Tommie and Lu Ann with one power move. I certainly hope that every third night over the past few months she and Lu Ann sat together staring at empty plates for several hungry, agonizing hours. “Look, Margo, I don’t think she’s coming home tonight, I could cook something real quick–” “No. It’s Tommie’s night.” “Well maybe we could just get some Thai food delivered, or–” “It’s Tommie’s night, and put that phone down RIGHT NOW or I am not responsible for the consequences.”
Better Half, 10/7/14
Remember, only in the sweet grip of death can you escape the extractive power of the tyrannical state! SUICIDE IS A REVOLUTIONARY ACT