The Comics Curmudgeon

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Moon over Flagstontown

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Hi and Lois, 1/10/23

You know and I know that Trixie Flagston has been doing her thing (“her thing” being sitting unattended on the floor for hours at a time and fixating on the shafts of light coming in from the outside in the absence of any other meaningful stimulus) since 1954, but I suppose we must concede that, in the world of the strip, Trixie is a literal baby and has only been doing it for a few months. Like maybe this is her first winter? Maybe this is the first she’s seen the moon? Anyway, watch out, Sunbeam, looks like Trixie has a new friend! You’d be upset, if you were the jealous type, and if your existence as a being with feelings and desires was anything other than a product of Trixie’s sad, lonely imagination.

Shoe, 1/10/23

Say what you will about Shoe, but its creator Jeff MacNelly was a real old-school newspaperman, and you can tell that’s built into its DNA by how accurate its depiction of most working journalists are (they’re all very depressed and hate the act of writing with their whole heart).

The Lockhorns, 1/10/23

Seems kind of obvious, Loretta. It’s so he doesn’t have to wash them! Glad I could help.

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Bowling … the most erotic of pastimes for the divorced man

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Slylock Fox, 1/9/24

Foolish animals! Did you really think that you could overthrow the humans and that your dominion over the Earth would be secure? In fact, your rule was a mere interregnum, the last moment of the ascendency of the flesh before the Machines, the true masters of the future, took their rightful place atop the hierarchy. Your time will be a scarcely remembered blip in the historical records that the cybernetic ones will meticulously maintain in their cloud-based collective memory banks.

Gil Thorp, 1/9/24

It’s fairly common in TV shows for a terrifying Big Bad character to be introduced who becomes so popular that they stick around and ultimately become allies with the protagonist. In the process, they sometimes lose much of the air of menace that made them intriguing in the first place, but this is the price of existence in a medium where the story never quite ends, and each character must adapt to its eternal rhythms or die. Anyway, while I don’t think anyone found Coach Hernandez scary per se upon his introduction, I also don’t think anyone expected him to become Gil’s loyal lieutenant who promises to hook him up with the town’s finest namesake MILFs so quickly either.

Shoe, 1/9/24

There are a lot of implications to unpack here — is bowling a signifier of a “hick” milieu? what would open-toed bowling shoes look like, if designed for either a normal human foot or a bird’s foot or whatever kind of hideous hybrid foot the bird-people of Shoe have? — but I’m stuck at the inciting incident, in which some guy who presumably Isn’t From Around Here just starts yammering about high fashion in a local bar, late at night when most people there are probably good and drunk. I’ve been accused of being a liberal city-dwelling coastal elitist in my time, and perhaps with good reason, but I don’t see the benefit of opening up this line of discourse and simply wouldn’t do it! Especially if I were wearing a v-neck sweater over a polo shirt, c’mon now.

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“It’s for the drinks!” Oh, ok, that’s normal then, I guess

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Dick Tracy, 1/8/24

“Wait,” you’re probably thinking, “Why is that any better? Why is getting back at Dick Tracy by killing his wife somehow easier or less dangerous than killing Tracy himself?” Oh, so you think Tess Trueheart doesn’t have anything else going on other than being married to Dick Tracy that would merit someone putting a price on her head? Sexist much???? I don’t know what that might be, but I’m sure we’re going to find out! In the final panel, Rikki Mortis is relieved to learn that today’s Dick Tracy does in fact pass the Bechdel Test.

Hi and Lois, 1/8/24

It wasn’t till today that I realized that I take the zany antics in Beetle Bailey in stride but think of its sister strip Hi and Lois as being more “realistic” for whatever reason. If General Halftrack were erotically snuggling his golf bag I wouldn’t blink an eye, but in this strip, it feels like we’re seeing the end of a long and elaborate passive-aggressive argument that has led to Hi embarking on an extremely ill-advised bit that he can’t back out of now.

Six Chix, 1/8/24

Wouldn’t it be great if one of your party guests showed up with a bag full of neatly cubed human flesh? That’s what the syndicated newspaper comic strip Six Chix would have you believe, anyway.