Comment of the Week

Really liking that accusing look on Dennis's face. 'I was promised some kind of circus freak who lived like a dog, and instead I get this boring suburban schmoe? Boo! Zero stars!’

pugfuggly

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Mark Trail, 5/31/08

For those of you new to Mark Trail, that individual in panel two is Kelly Welly, the strip’s resident sexpot, who’s always trying seduce Mark away from his virtuous, ever-faithful wife Cherry. The fact that you’re supposed to be looking at that face and thinking “irresistible seductress” and not “fetal alcohol syndrome” tells you pretty much everything you need to know about the depiction of humans in this strip.

Naturally, when Kelly started talking about “filming” at Lost Forest that could net the big bucks, my mind immediately turned to pornography. My bet is that Kelly initially hoped to get Mark to star in her sexy wilderness production, Naughty Nature Lovers, with herself as both the auteur and female lead; Mark’s dogged professionalism would overcome is total asexual disinterest and finally lead him to give her the ravishing she’s been wanting for years. But with Mark out of the area, her Plan B is to make Cherry her star, and once Mark sees her naked (he hasn’t yet, obviously), their marriage will be destroyed, as he can’t deal with yucky girl parts.

Mary Worth, 5/31/08

Mary thought she was done with Jeff — but then she caught a glimpse of that Corey ass, the one that always keeps the ladies coming back.

Sally Forth, 5/31/08

New #1 on my list of incredibly creepy euphemisms for having sex that will ensure years of involuntary celibacy: “practice making a baby”.

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Judge Parker, 5/30/08

“A virus called … reefer madness! How could we resist, when it sold like hotcakes?”

Spider-Man, 5/30/08

Uh-oh! The last time a guy with a mustache like that bellowed “This means war!”, the world was in a heap o’ trouble, for about six years or so.

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So I’m going away tomorrow for the weekend, and was hoping to polish Friday comics off before bed, but here it is after 1 am and the King Features strips are all down (have we angered you, O Chennux?). So, you’ll get three day’s worth of comics when I get back Sunday, or maybe four days on Monday at some point. Happy weekend!

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