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In the 48 hours or so since he first waltzed onto Milford High’s practice diamond, it’s become clear that Otha “Clambake” Yancey is a true hero for our age. Let’s review some of his classic utterances:

• “You’re pulling your head, son.”
• “Lock your eyes on one hole, get set, and swing.”
• “And keep doing it!”
• “Everyone calls me Clambake.”

The question quickly became: Should Clambake be commemorated by items of clothing that sport a logo that Josh quickly threw together using royalty-free clip art and offered for sale at the Comics Curmudgeon store? Frankly, to ask this question is to know the answer.

Yes! You can now display this baffling, ludicrous artwork on numerous items that you can purchase at CafePress! (Including the baseball jersey type shirts, natch.) If you’re sick of everyone calling you Otha and want to start going by Clambake, well, these are the shirts for you.

Meanwhile, there’s been some controversy over a statement I made about our good Clambake earlier today. Is Mr. Yancey indeed black, as I posited? I admit that, because this is Gil Thorp we’re talking about, subtle features like skin color can be hard to figure out. My own wife called me from work today to argue that he’s supposed to be a crusty old New Englander (which would ground the “Clambake” nickname somewhere near to sanity) and that “Otha” is some kind of Maineification of “Arthur.”

I base my assertion on being a longtime student of the subtleties of Gil Thorp artwork; plus, when Clambake was first introduced to us last week, he was seen talking to his son:

I admit that Yancey Junior is kind of racially indeterminate as well to the untrained eye, but the jagged nimbus around his head is one of the two styles of hair in this feature that generally indicates African-American status (the other, cornrows, being way too edgy for this harried buppie). Plus, Clambake pretty much exudes that vibe, associated with nice old black men in too many movies and books to count, of “Here’s a nice old black man who’s going to help you white people solve your problems with his folk wisdom/instinctive understanding of human nature/magical powers, but isn’t going to do anything to make you uncomfortable, like have sex with white women or vote or speak in that damn ‘izzle’ language.” But I could of course be wrong. Maybe Clambake’s racial background is unimportant. Maybe it’s just important that we call him “Clambake.”

Speaking of insanity and Gil Thorp, I’ve gotten quite a few good entries in the Self-Clubbing Tyler contest. I’ll probably be posting the first batch of pics by Friday, but you should absolutely send yours in today!

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Were you under the impression that only members of the species Homo sapiens could wear Comics Curmudgeon merchandise? Well, let Thing and Yong Yong, adorned in Molly the Bear gear by faithful reader Andrea D and the Grandstanding Oddballs, disabuse you of that notion!

Now that you know that Comics Curmudgeon gear can be enjoyed by your pets, you’re going to want to buy some, obviously.

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Dennis the Menace, 4/17/07

It’s easy to feel like you don’t make a difference in this cruel world, but every once in a while you realize that concentrated effort can effect change. For instance, lately I think I’ve detected a modest but measurable uptick in menacing on the part of Dennis Mitchell, and I’m more than willing to credit that to the hectoring from this site. Today’s installment is particularly delicious, as Dennis manages to emasculate his father on two levels: by revealing to a third party that his wife openly flirts with other men, and by suggesting that he make a pass at this strappling officer of the law. The look of barely internalized rage on Henry’s face might suggest savage beatings down the road, but the Mitchells are a civilized clan: presumably some act of psychological warfare will be perpetrated against his son instead.

Mark Trail, 4/17/07

Speaking of savage beatings, I can’t wait to see the epic fisticuffs that will soon break out in this dingy hotel room, reducing the cheap furniture to so much kindling. In the second panel, the reason for Mark’s tie becomes obvious: for a brief moment, Dan has mistaken Mark for a Mormon missionary, and that instant of confusion gives our hero the opening he needs to force his way in and get all shouty shouty.

Apartment 3-G, 4/17/07

I have a great memory for useless trivia, and it’s both a blessing and a curse. For instance, most of you have probably long forgotten that more than six months ago Margo casually mentioned that she had an assistant, but I’ve been on tenterhooks to find out who this person was, or if the very existence of such an individual was just a figment of Margo’s bravado and need to look important and/or imagination. Today, we learn that she’s hired an attractive, younger fellow, naturally, though his unnaturally wide hair part and taste in powder blue polo shirts are unfortunate. While it’s impossible to say for sure, we can reasonably assume that he harbors lustful feelings in his heart for his boss, which her frequent outbursts of unreasonable rage only intensify.

By the way, Margo, I don’t mean to speak out of turn, but you were, strictly speaking, hired to, um, help. Don’t be mad at me.

Gil Thorp, 4/17/07

Oh, so he’s a preternaturally helpful old black man with a colorful nickname! Nice. I bet he has some real life lessons to impart to these young white people. Yup.

To be fair, if my name were “Otha,” I’d go by a nickname too. The fact that he likes to be called “Clambake” may indicate that his real agenda is to protect the Milford baseball team from Scientology.