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Blondie, 2/13/25

I like the first couple of panels here: Dagwood being somewhat indulgent about his barber’s fixation — he knows a thing or two about fixations, ha ha! — but looking concerned as he walks out, knowing that his nervously sweaty friend will be blowing that crisp $20 bill on officially licensed Team USA merch or a Peacock Premium subscription. I don’t care for the final panel, though, as it forces me to contemplate how weird Dagwood’s skull shape is.

Dick Tracy, 2/13/25

Oh yeah so it turns out that Dick’s ex-partner was in fact the real killer, and all his (stolen? I think? or maybe he was paid, to do crime?) money blew away right before Dick punched him in the face. I guess it proves that crime doesn’t pay, because your money will blow away, and that’s even before the part where you get punched in the face.

B.C., 2/13/25

Hey, remember how the ant dad in B.C. died horribly? Were you wondering how his family was doing in his absence? Well! Not good, it turns out.

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Marvin, 2/12/26

A thing about Marvin is that over the years it has strayed further and further from the one thing that made it unique — a comic strip? about a baby? — and made Marvin more of a generic child of indeterminate age who goes to school and speaks in complete sentences. In order to “get back to its roots,” the strip is doing a flashback sequence to show us what Marvin was like when he was really a baby, like a really tiny young baby, and it turns out what he was like was infested by vermin.

Dennis the Menace, 2/12/26

You guys know I am not a fan of the “Dennis insults his mother’s cooking” Dennis the Menaces, but I gotta say I kind of enjoy this one, because (1) Dennis’s insult is fairly silly and actually the sort of thing a small child might say, and (2) we get a reaction panel showing us that Dennis is realizing how extremely sick of his shit his parents are.

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Shoe, 2/11/26

Shoe is a comic strip about depressed bird-people that is pretty committed to the gag-a-day format, but it’s actually been doing a continuing story of sorts for the past week or so. The story is about how the Perfesser bought a beautiful classic car that has turned out to be impractical and unsuitable for everyday use, giving him a specific reason to be depressed beyond the strip’s general sense of ennui.

Crock, 2/11/26

Wow, I bet you assumed Crock’s Legionnaires were involved in a rapacious colonial war to build up the glory and wealth of France, but apparently they will sometimes impose harsh punishments on French industrialists who aim to exploit the colonized population in ways that violate the laws of the Métropole! It really makes you think (about how child labor isn’t really a suitable subject for jokes, and execution by firing squad probably isn’t either).

Mary Worth, 2/11/26

JESUS CHRIST JEFF SHUT UP DO NOT ASK HER ABOUT THIS SHE WILL RECOUNT THE WHOLE STORYLINE AT YOU AND WE JUST NOW GOT OUT OF IT I’M BEGGING YOU