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Four sentences about four comics

Apartment 3-G, 6/17/07

To honor the professional nature of the setting and somber tone of the occasion, Blaze has finally taken off his moronic cowboy hat.

Hi and Lois, 6/17/07

The artist of Hi and Lois has had secondhand accounts of hippies relayed to him, but has never actually met one, or seen a picture of one.

Judge Parker, 6/17/07

Sam finally admits it: Sophie is smarter than he is.

Spider-Man, 6/17/07

Spider-Man believes that throwing his wife into the air constitutes foreplay.

168 responses to “Four sentences about four comics”

  1. Dingo
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:20 pm [Reply]

    Sophie, Sophie, Sophie. You look like a midget whore.

  2. Dingo
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:20 pm [Reply]

    D’oh! I copped a ‘first.’

  3. Anonymous
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:22 pm [Reply]

    Is it just me or does Julia look sort of like Grimace? I wonder if she likes Big Macs?

  4. LTBF
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:26 pm [Reply]

    I just get a wierd feeling when a strip that debuted in the 1950s and has the same family setup it does today has somebody having a flashback to life as a single young vagabound in the 1960s.

  5. Eric B.
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:28 pm [Reply]

    Nice of Blaze to dress up for the occasion by donning his Charles Nelson Reilly get-up.

  6. Proteus
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:30 pm [Reply]

    “Spider-Man believes that throwing his wife into the air constitutes foreplay”

    Given what she’s wearing (and what she isn’t), the posing and the looks, Spidey would be hard-pressed to do anything that isn’t foreplay.

    Still and all, that is one frisky comic, folks. Wild thing and all.

  7. CrabbyGenes
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:30 pm [Reply]

    Good God, Spiderman is MARRIED?

    I did think that Sunday strip was a little racy for a family comic when I first read it. (Can you tell that it’s almost the first Spiderman comic I’ve ever read?)

    Well, like I said on another thread, I keep learning new things from this website.

  8. Artist formerly known as Ben
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:30 pm [Reply]

    The wayback picture of Hi doesn’t speak “hippy” to me. More like “schizophrenic off meds for five days.”

  9. etho
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:31 pm [Reply]

    Considering the bright pink shirt and the, uh, fabulous cravat thing, “Blaze” has the most appropriate name in the history of comics. Yes, more appropriate than “Crabby” the crabby crab from Mutts. More approriate than “Chubby Hugs”, the fat, hugging cat from Get Fuzzy. More appropriate even than the Patterson Family’s eldest daughter, “Eloserbeth.”

    On a completely unrelated note, happy Gay Pride Week!

  10. Reid
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:41 pm [Reply]

    Blaze is unaware of the Federal law that prevents anyone wearing a neckerchief from serving as someone’s legal guardian.

    And if that’s what Hi looked like after high school, how old was he when he started popping out the kids? If Chip is his oldest, Hi must have dropped off into a bad-acid coma in the summer of love, and not woken up for thirty years.

  11. Skullturf Q. Beavispants
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:46 pm [Reply]

    This Hi & Lois is also guilty of a chronology mistake that a lot of strips seem to commit. (Admittedly, though, to be fair, it’s impossible to remain consistent in a strip where character’s ages are frozen.) It still kind of bugs me, though. People: “Parent of teenager” is no longer synonymous with “ex-hippie”. In fact, they haven’t been synonymous for quite some time. Think about it: the oldest teenagers were born in 1988.

    I was born in 1974 and hence turned 33 this year. Some of my peers half-jokingly describe themselves as “children of hippies”, but we’re close to being the youngest people who can make this claim. And sure, there has continued to be a minority of people who lead a hippie-ish lifestyle in any era, but it’s no longer valid to use the old shortcut: “Oh, you’re 17? Your parents must have totally been hippies!”

  12. Octal
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:47 pm [Reply]

    I can only hope that “Things get WILD again!” is not a reference to a sex scene next week.

  13. Skullturf Q. Beavispants
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:47 pm [Reply]

    Hey, while I was writing, Reid also complained about the inconsistent chronology in H&L. Great minds and all that.

  14. Tom T.
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:48 pm [Reply]

    Same question I’ve asked before, because this fascinates me. The day that is now closing in Spider-Man — how long ago (in our world) did it begin? And how long has he been in LA, for that matter?

  15. SecretMargo
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:49 pm [Reply]

    Sophie is smarter than any of them. As I said before, her only rival is RMMD’s Abbey The Wonderdog. If it came down to it, Sophie’s sheer greed would give her an advantage if they played Monopoly, but Abbey’s got her beat with more cerebral games like chess or Trivial Pursuit.

  16. yellojkt
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:51 pm [Reply]

    Until this day I have never contemplated the erotic potential of Spidey-webbing. Now I need to go vomit.

  17. BTS
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:55 pm [Reply]

    Josh may disagree with me, but I’m gonna say it:
    Blaze is gayer than Judge Parker.

  18. SecretMargo
    June 17th, 2007 at 10:57 pm [Reply]

    17: It’s even better if you remember the spinning/spoojing analogy emphasized in the films! By better, I mean “much more deeply nauseating,” of course (especially the second panel on the bottom).

  19. LTBF
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:00 pm [Reply]

    Maybe it is supposed to be the 1970s when Hi is hitchhiking. But that doesn’t explain why he hs the same hairstyle (and hairline) he has today. I’m 40 and far from bald but had much more hair (not long, just more of it) when I graduated high school.

  20. SamFromUtah
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:01 pm [Reply]

    Spider-Man believes that throwing his wife into the air constitutes foreplay.

    The relative sexual cluelessness of a spider!!!

    I hadn’t heard one of those in a while.

  21. Some Guy Here
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:11 pm [Reply]

    I know this isn’t much of a comment, but reading “Spider-man believes that throwing his wife into the air constitutes as foreplay” is hands-down the funniest thing I’ve read this week (and yes I know it’s only Sunday, shut up! :p)

    …although considering that I [i]have[/i] read the Sunday comics, in a way that’s kinda sad….

  22. Poteet
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:15 pm [Reply]

    BWAHAHA! Hi of Hi & Lois, I’m old enough that I knew some hippies back in the day, and you, sir, are no hippie. But your attempt at being one is so funny it made me spit water on the floor. And dear God, is that brown thing at the back of your head supposed to be a ponytail?

    # 7 — CrabbyGenes, per your earlier question, I’ve been hurling blue glass doorknobs at the Foob reception because I’m dressed like Queen of Diamonds from a recent DICK TRACY plot and part of the plot was that a blue glass doorknob was mistaken for a ginormous blue diamond called the Blue Eye of the…umm… never mind. This explanation is sounding even stupider than the plot did.

  23. TB Tabby
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:17 pm [Reply]

  24. Lettuce
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:20 pm [Reply]

    Foob: I love this upcoming thread! Shannon and her friends will go to the telethon, and with April watching will hold a big banquet thanking Becky and Gerald for thier help.

    Then, they start the Canadian Special Ed chant (One of us / one of us / gobble gobble / we accept her / one of us) and Becky says something totally rude and roadside and gets turned into a chicken.

    It’ll be Lynn’s most believable plotline in years.

  25. bobbaloo (aka bob byrd)
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:20 pm [Reply]

    I never knew Mary Jane was one of those “natural women” but the hairy armpit in panel two indicates otherwise…

  26. Artist formerly known as Ben
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:21 pm [Reply]

    It was never really all that valid to begin with. I was born in 1970, and was really the only child of hippies in my class. Of course it was Catholic school, but still. I’m guessing only about a quarter of baby boomers could be called hippies even defined loosely.

  27. Dr. Dong
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:29 pm [Reply]

    I think these Spider-Man comics are a little better
    Not for kids btw

  28. t.a.m.s.y.
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:32 pm [Reply]

    “Next: Things get WILD again!”? Man, even Stan Lee thinks Spider-Man’s a bad lay.

  29. SecretMargo
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:32 pm [Reply]


    MW: Behind her tight smile, Mary calculates how much to up the level of muscle relaxants she puts in Dr. Corey’s tuna casserole tonight. Is it time to take that final step from “paraplegic” up to “puddle”?

    RMMD: I can understand June’s pique — any association with Rex’s raging incompetence is insulting, even if it’s at the level of job title.

    A3G: The tell-tale teardrop tattoos reveal Nora to be part of the same girl gang as Tommie. Nora’s double marking shows that she’s a more prolific murderess, but Tommie’s kill was more innovative: a steady whine that went on for a full month, which lasted past the point when her target succumbed and put a shiv through the ear by twenty-nine days.

    Blondie: Sure, you’re going to act all offended when you read this, but you know in your heart you’d sleep with a dog too if Dagwood was your other option.

  30. Reepicheep-chan
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:41 pm [Reply]

    Things get wild again, eh? Wait, when were they wild in the forst place? I seem to remember Spiderman geting hit with a brick and watching some TV, but I recall very little ‘wild’.

  31. Christopher
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:44 pm [Reply]

    Jesus, for a former hippie Hi sure is an uptight boxcar.

    I mean, your kid has planned out both college and post-college complete with an alternative job if the career he’s working on doesn’t plan out. How much more direction do you want you old bastard?

    When I was Chip’s age my plan was pretty much, “Uh… go to college, or maybe get a job at Jiffy Lube, I guess.”

    I guess it’s a typo, and Chip’s supposed to be talking about graduating from high school, because otherwise it looks like the only answer Hi would accept is “I plan to go to college, get my MBA, and immediately take a soul-numbing corporate job just like you dad.”

    I bet Hi wasn’t really a hippy; he was probably one of those FBI moles they had in radical groups back in the day.

  32. Uncle Lumpy
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:46 pm [Reply]

    #30 Reepicheep –

    That was no ordinary brick!

  33. Red Greenback
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:51 pm [Reply]

    I don’t like to repost, but I feel there is an urgent moral in two Sunday strips:
    MT: “Give a Hoot, Don’t Drown”…or “Turn Around, Read a Book”
    FOOB: “Canada. Leading the world in being just north of the United States.”


  34. Skullturf Q. Beavispants
    June 17th, 2007 at 11:54 pm [Reply]

    #31 Christopher — or Hi could have been an undercover cop like on that one episode of SCTV. “Say, do any of you hep cats know where I can score some sweet grass? I’ve got plenty of bread, man, no sweat.”

  35. Mibbitmaker
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:00 am [Reply]

    (Keeping in mind that my attempt to catch up got “illegal operation”ed — and, really, whichever hackers invented that cruelty, disemboweling’s too good for ‘em! — early in two threads back, and I’m too fed up to plow through the rest for now to wait…)


    A3G: Blaze, hatless as Josh said, shows up and is played, all of a sudden, by Jeff Goldblum. The conversation stays with [popular divisive social issue] when we see Eric’s wife (I think) worrying about his safety—




    Oh, great! Another person in this strip to worry about! Betcha everyone in the 3G universe comes close to helping him, but fall short for contrived reasons, all the while we see him being harrassed nearly to death by the ghost of Van Gogh, whose J. Paul Getty jokes get way too monotonous.

    Meanwhile, back at BarelyCare Memorial Hospital, the gang follows instructions in a book written by Dr. Hack –er– Jack Kevorkian, with illustrations by Albert Pinkham Ryder (a-HA!!).

    * (said Dave Letterman style)

  36. Cornwhacker
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:08 am [Reply]

    I love how that last Spider-Man panel urges us to give Peter and MJ some privacy in the caption, and yet invites us to spy into their bedroom window in the drawing.

    I think Hi’s flashback takes place in the 1980s. He’s sporting the 50s/60s retro look that was so popular back then.

  37. dreadedcandiru2
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:09 am [Reply]

    9CL : Edda rejoins Halucination Nation today. Since the unicorn is a Symbol for her concerns that she acually is a flake, how do we interpret her giveing herself the mental bird?

    Curtis : Ah, good! Billingsley is playing the relevance card! Since he’s not an insane white woman fron Ontario, HE’LL be able to pull it off, unlike the mess we’re gonna see in the Foobiverse.

    Luann : More wacky adventures with Brad and the Fuck-up Fairy!

    FW : Whoopty FREAKIN’ Do!! Darin gets to hug Lisa on her deathbed! Like we didn’t see THAT coming when he started looking for his birth parents.

  38. dreadedcandiru2
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:12 am [Reply]

    Spider-Man : I keep forgetting that Iron Man hasn’t screwed Peter over in the comic strip. Not that I wouldn’t mind seeing Shell-head in the four-panel world — making Mike Patterson eat repulsor rays!!

  39. Cornwhacker
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:13 am [Reply]

    That last Judge Parker is lovely, too: “We have a long day tomorrow!”

    You always do, Sam. Approximately four months long, to be exact.

  40. SecretMargo
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:17 am [Reply]

    34: Perhaps this flashback is not from when Hi was a teenager, but actually last year, when he had a midlife crisis, took an unpaid leave from work and pursued his long-held dream to be mistaken for a German tourist and adopted as the lovable “Führer figure” to a group of wayward teens who’d get “Hi” enough under his influence to help him overthrow the government. It all ended in tears, of course, and though Lois never found out, the kids always suspected. This strip illustrates his eldest son’s decision to let his father that the secret’s out and that the past can never be truly buried for good. Hi’s sudden look of abject terror tells us that the message has gotten through: he’s dealing with more than just a Chip now; this is the rise of a whole new Bloc.

  41. Anonymous
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:18 am [Reply]

    40: “Seig Hi!” ?

  42. Gg83
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:26 am [Reply]

    A3-G: Man, Blaze has got one hell of an inappropriate sneer in panel three. He looks like a snobbish jerk, and not the smiling cowboy we once knew. I’m going to start calling Cravat Man “Blaise” until he starts being less smarmy-looking and puts his hat on again, and nothing can stop me! Unless I forget.

    Also, I wonder if he has any relation to this Blaze.

    Note to Josh, regarding sentence #1: he took his hat “off,” not “of.”

    23 TB Tabby–

    I was just going to scans_daily to look up the picture in your first link! I love the comic book Spider-Man, and he is so darn adorable when attempting to be romantic with MJ. It may not be for everyone, but if I were married to Peter Parker, I’m pretty sure that would get me in the mood for number 5ing*…er, [margo]ing. I wish that comic strip Spider-Man were as awesome as comic book Spider-Man is. It makes me wonder what happened to Stan Lee; it’s hard for me to believe that he’s actually the one writing the comic. Someday, I need to gather a collection of links of Spidey being awesome and post them here, so those who only know him through the comic strip can revel in his awesomitude. (Wait, should I drop the “e,” or should it be “awesomeitude”? Ah, the perils of made-up words.) Sadly, I may be too procrastinatory to do so. But someone should.

    * The mix-up in board terminology was caused by my sudden delayed realization that I know you from elsewhere. The identical names should have been a tipoff, but I’m horrible with online names, so what prompted my recognition was the fact that you posted comic book pages (or links) both here and there.

  43. Mibbitmaker
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:28 am [Reply]


    9CL: …And the same to you, too, Brooke.

    JP: Abbey wanted to stick it to Roger Cabot with the house-buying? I thought it was the other way around! And we learn that Rachel wasn’t all she’s cracked up to be, either… unless you’re Ronald Reagan.

    MT: First there was WHAT
    Then there was WHERE, like now.
    And I have to ask, Elrod…

    RMMD: “No, it’s my husband who’s the physician. Oh, I almost forgot: he was your chauffer!” And the slow burn will be very funny, indeed!

  44. SecretMargo
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:30 am [Reply]

    41: Dammit Dammit Dammit! Whoever you are, you just came up with the joke I was trying to get to without knowing it. Dammit! (And thank you)

  45. Jym
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:30 am [Reply]

    =v= Hippies were mostly the 1960s but the mass media image of hippies changed a lot, later. Basically the 1970s were an era of marketing whatever “hippie” thing could be commodified. Look back at issues of Look or some other photojournal and you’ll see some dorky-looking shorthairs amongst the hippies. None that quite look like Hi, though.

    The old photos of Walt Duncan in Zits really do look like the late 1970s.

    Also, MJ’s armpit hair is timelessly bohemian.

  46. DaveyK
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:38 am [Reply]

    Apartment 3G can’t find it in itself to spend more than 5 panels on LuAnn’s life-threatening illness before reflexively changing topics to give center stage to someone else’s petty problem. Margo would be proud.

  47. Dub Not Dubya
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:39 am [Reply]

    Monday’s A3G:

    Am I the only one who misread the first panel so that she was saying “This strip is taking too long.”? Truer words were never spoken, Margo-clone.

    Monday’s Judge Parker (no link because the Chron takes a million years to load for me): alright, I’ve been reading this strip for more than two years now, but I don’t know who the hell Marie is. Oh wait, it’s Judge Parker, so I don’t care.

  48. TB Tabby
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:49 am [Reply]

    ZtP: AUGH! Again I am reminded that the crazy, pointy-headed man who wears booties and a muumuu is more built than I am.

    SFx: Not that it matters. The kind of people Count Wierdly is selling this scam to will happily believe that Slylock is part of a Roswell/CIA/black helicopter/one-world government conspiracy cover-up. The truth is out there…just not here.

    Blondie: …is into bestiality.

  49. Brendan
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:51 am [Reply]


    Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die!

    That is all.

  50. Red Greenback
    June 18th, 2007 at 1:02 am [Reply]

  51. Old Bean
    June 18th, 2007 at 1:11 am [Reply]

    Judging by MJ’s appearance today, Mr Person-Who-Draws-Spiderman seems to be labouring under the old idea that woman = man + boobs + cheap red wig. If it were that simple, I think a number of surgeons would be out of work.

  52. Sylphi
    June 18th, 2007 at 1:27 am [Reply]

    Nono, Sam admits it: he’s a pedophile.

  53. Red Greenback
    June 18th, 2007 at 1:32 am [Reply]

  54. Obstreperous B
    June 18th, 2007 at 1:33 am [Reply]

    Ok, this “Nora Mills” is clearly Margo’s doppelganger. If this were any other character, I’d call her an evil twin, but in this case, she’s obviously the good one. I yearn to see a flashback sequence in which the hapless Nora Mills stumbles across some relic of Sunken R’lyeh that extracts all her evil impulses and gives them bodily form, which form takes upon itself the unholy name of Margo and goes forth to drown the world in its disdain.

  55. Lynngineering
    June 18th, 2007 at 1:41 am [Reply]

    So its all about kinship is it…

    A3G – I would be greatly concerned about the chance that, if I end up in a hospital, with coma, potential vegetable state and inoperable condition, my fate resides in the decisions of my only next of kin, who is named like a stripper, “Blaze”.

    Hi – “Relax Dad, just kidding! Actually, I do want to be just like you. I want to get a nameless, soulsucking, dead-end job in some corporate outpost, live in some non-descript suburbs where barbecue is king, and my best buddy is the alcoholic neighbor, and whenever we want to get away from our valium and ‘luded wives and just get sloshed we go “play golf”!

    JP: The judge would take one look at this and say, “Sam you are so p-whipped! Get a hold of yourself man! You were — what, a lawyer? a detective? whatever, it was MANLY for gods sake. Abbey is horny in Paris with ridiculous investments, Neddy is a total fool, and you’re sitting here in the middle of nowhere, imagining some fantasy dialog with this girl who is actually screaming and throwing things at you since half an hour!”

    Spidey: I can just hear Aunt May: “So…. this is how you take on the great responsibility? Laying that slut Mary Jane?”

    FBOFW: Oops, Michael couldn’t keep her out, APRIL has re-emerged in the fantasy! Ready to reprise and complete her role as T(G)er(ald)minator. She wasn’t going to do it, she wasn’t going to do it, she wasn’t going – - then SHANNON, Julia’s spiritual kin, is deployed, with her special-needs friends, to remind April this telethon with no particular name or target, is for “us”.
    Julia is Anthony’s “beard”, Shannon is the equivalent of blue-balls for April. Carrie-like fun ahead…

  56. The Spectacular Spider-Brick
    June 18th, 2007 at 1:48 am [Reply]

    Land ho! At last, I’m back on American soil! Good ol’ Southernmost City in the Continental U.S., Key West!

    …I would have to land here on the first weekend of Gay Pride Week, wouldn’t I?

    Well, hell, I’m wearing a purple bow tie, who am I to judge? Let’s snark some Monday strips, goils! Wooo!

    9CL: Y’know what, Brooke? Same to you, too.

    Archie: It was funny when Stephen Wright said it. It was slightly less funny when Jerry Seinfeld said it. It got incrementally less funny every time another hack Seinfeld wanna-be said it. Now that it’s completely unfunny, the AJGLU3000 says it… and emphasizes the wrong words, to boot. Archie: Alerting you the instant a joke is played out for more than 40 years!

    BS: The theory of parallel universes says that somewhere, in another dimension, there’s a person who is identical to me in every way, except that he thinks every single panel of Ballard Street is pure comedy gold. Oh, and that he’s intensely stoned.

    BB: Dropo, you’re the laziest man on Mars!

    DT: Look out, Dick! The Baron is smuggling polonium-210 in his eyebrows!

    (DT)GT: It makes sense now! They’re all reverse Samsons!

    HotC: Oh, thank God that sound effect wasn’t what I thought it was. (Definitely NSFW!)

    JP: I know I haven’t been reading this strip long, but who the hell is Marie, and why does she look like the love child of Spider-Man’s MJ and Alfred E. Newman?

    Kudzu: This joke wasn’t funny when it was on a T-shirt. I just said it was funny ’cause I needed an excuse to be staring at her tits.

    RiR: Isn’t Pasquale supposed to be despondent that school is out? Consistency, Wimmer, consistency!

    SFx: Count Weirdly’s interstellar communicator looks slightly more plausible than E.T.’s, considering that E.T. didn’t have a live crab powering his.

    SS: So that means Jughaid was almost a bastard in both senses of the term!

    ZtP: I’m hearing Rod Stewart in my head right now, for some reason.

  57. Mibbitmaker
    June 18th, 2007 at 1:54 am [Reply]

    FOOB: Lynn David Chased us on Foobocalypse. Telethon at the mall, huh? Don’t tell Robin Sparkles! Uh-oh, it’s PodApril again!

    And just when I’m about to loathe the sudden turn into another dopey storyline mid-story, we may actually see Apes getting knocked off her Pod Patterson Pedistal! YAY!!

    ….oh, who’m I kidding? Sha…nn…on will probably just be the wing man for Gerald/April. JuliaShannon, that is.

  58. Randy S
    June 18th, 2007 at 2:58 am [Reply]

    Say what you want about Hi’s version of a “hippie” but nothing could be more bizarre than the way they were actually portrayed in the popular media of the time, for example on shows like Bewitched.

    (i.e., Nehru jackets and love beads)

  59. zooby
    June 18th, 2007 at 3:02 am [Reply]

    I choose to believe Margo’s stony glare is not for Alan, but for Blaze, whom she has just spotted walking into the hospital wearing his black neckerchief of mourning. She’s absent for the rest of the strip because she had to go laugh at him privately. After all, nobody wants to see a grown, singing gay cowboy cry. At least, not without his hat on.

  60. The Avocado Avenger
    June 18th, 2007 at 3:45 am [Reply]

    Sunday Hi & Lois: Wrapping a necktie around your head and calling it a headband usually indicates mental instability, not hippieness. I’m really surprised the writer/artist didn’t know this already. I guess he’s been in the ScadutoDome, where it’s still 1954, and he can only imagine what a hippie will look like. (He should have beatniks down pat, though.)

    Monday A3G: I think they took Tommie’s single-teardrop pane and Xeroxed it, drew Nora’s hair on her, and re-used it for panel 2 of this strip.

    (DT)GT: Now that some heads are trimmed, we’re having a winning season and everyone’s getting along. For fifty bucks I’ll tell you what needs to be trimmed to win the playoffs.

    Luann: Someone remind me why I read this stupid strip.

    I, for one, did not need to start the week with hot Spiderman action.

  61. Meggie
    June 18th, 2007 at 3:55 am [Reply]

    In the third panel of A3G, when Tommie said “She’s in the intensive care unit,” I glanced and thought it said “She’s an insensitive cunty slut!”.

    I would’ve perferred that.

  62. Alex
    June 18th, 2007 at 5:19 am [Reply]

    A3G: Most people need surgery to have a face that tight. Margo just has to pull her hair back and her entire body is ready to go. Presumably her pride in this is why she didn’t bother to wear anything but her open robe to the hospital.

    Mibbitmaker, regarding Blaze: You see Jeff Goldblum, I see Alan Alda. Then he became Don Knotts in panel four. I started toying with the idea that he also looked like Larry Storch and that Marlo Thomas was the special guest star at the end. Then I had to turn off TV Land and lie down in a dark room for awhile.

  63. Old Bean
    June 18th, 2007 at 5:28 am [Reply]

    I just got another laugh out of Margo’s inappropriate scowl in the first panel. She probably doesn’t even know she’s doing it. Why so angry, Margo? ‘Angry? Shut up! I’m trying to look concerned. Someone woke me and now I’m in some sort of hospital and LuAnn’s dead or whatever and I’m kind of horny and these people aren’t talking about me and GOD I’M BORED.’

  64. .Doc
    June 18th, 2007 at 5:29 am [Reply]

    FOOB: Already got this one nailed. April will attend the telethon in support of Shannon. Meanwhile, while playing in Rebecca’s band, Gerald will hear Shannon make some horrific comment about “retards” or something similar. Gerald will, quite rightly, take immediate umbrage and verbally sanction Rebecca in a most satisfying manner, quit the band mid-Telethon, leaving Rebecca and her Bad Karma Band without a drummer. April will witness the whole thing, be quite impressed by Gerald’s performance, and soon they will be back in their comfy accommodation.

  65. .Doc
    June 18th, 2007 at 5:30 am [Reply]

    64: Oooops! That should read “Gerald will hear Rebecca make some horrific comment…” Sorry. Typing fast — have to get to work!

  66. Anonymous
    June 18th, 2007 at 5:36 am [Reply]

    11, 31: Hi was the FBI infiltrator that engineered the sterilization of all the hippies, so they couldn’t have children after ’74.

  67. Trotzenbonnie
    June 18th, 2007 at 5:53 am [Reply]

    Hi wasn’t a hippie. He was AWOL and hitchhiking his way through the Himalayas after fragging his CO in Da Nang. There’s an M-16 in that guitar case and he’s wearing a coolie hat swiped from some peasant while he was slogging across the rice paddies. He got the camera at the Great Wall from a Japanese tourist that he had for dinner with some fava beans and a nice Chianti which, it turned out, is really hard to find in China. And that headband is just a souvenir garter from a plus size hooker he “met” in Bangkok. Duh.

    Archie – Imagine how perplexed Dilton will be when he figures out that his nose runs and his feet smell.

    Rex Morgan MD – No, Mr. Avery. I’m in the health care business. Now bend over so I can give you this ginger ale enema.

    Judge Parker – What the – ? Abbey has grown a penis and there’s a smallpox outbreak in Parkertown?

    FC – The poor little doll on the headboard looks like it suffered the same fate as that crucifix in the Exorcist.

    Blondie – Daisy has the most satisified expression seen in the Bumstead bed for a very very long time.

  68. Grinderman
    June 18th, 2007 at 5:58 am [Reply]

    I’m surprised nobody realized the obvious here – Hi wasn’t a “hippie” back in the day, Hi was a NARC. Every anti-war demonstration I ever went to there was an undercover cop dressed like this, talking about blowing up the draft board or scoring some “good weed, man.”

  69. John C Fremont
    June 18th, 2007 at 6:01 am [Reply]

    Retail – Somebody please read Retail today.

  70. John Small Berries
    June 18th, 2007 at 6:15 am [Reply]

    I see Darby Conley has taken lessons from Mark Trail about word-balloon tail placement, for in today’s Get Fuzzy, Rob’s genitalia are participating in the conversation.

  71. Little Guy
    June 18th, 2007 at 6:15 am [Reply]

    Sunday Spideys are for maximum Mary Jane boobiage.

    JP: Does Sophie have spur-of-the-moment chicken pox?

  72. Trotzenbonnie
    June 18th, 2007 at 6:22 am [Reply]

    #69 – JCF
    Maybe Lio and Zippy were shopping together in Macy’s….

  73. Pozzo
    June 18th, 2007 at 6:25 am [Reply]

    Let’s face it — the writer of H&L has never seen a teenager, either.

  74. Trotzenbonnie
    June 18th, 2007 at 6:41 am [Reply]

    First Mary, then June and now Wanda…Are interrobang blouses becoming the fashion de rigueur for comic strip women?

  75. Lettuce
    June 18th, 2007 at 6:42 am [Reply]

    let’s play the “how will FOOB resolve the April storyline?”

    Since April, for all of her would-be roadsidedness, is still saintly (remember, she never got TOO roadside with Gerald, and then Mom came home) the comeuppance will have to be with Becky and Gerald.

    So, either
    a) Gerald is caught mid-smooch with Becky, and Apes storms out, post-biting zinger, dignity in tact;

    b) Gerald gets his comeuppance, with Becky proving she was only after him to hurt April, who still has her dignity.

    c) Becky gets her comeuppance, likely at the hand of Shannon and her friends. (I think Becky’s comeuppance will begin with a rant about how dumb Shannon is, that the mics pick up. Then comes the slowly-moving mob of stammering people that will leave her chastened and ironically brain damages.

    d) While Becky is being comeupped, April will take the stage and sing a song of love, betrayal and how much she likes puppies — which will totally rock the puppy-focues crowd. An A&R guy will give her the standard Rich and Famous contract, thus proving that they’re ALL in a coma dream, not just Mike.

    e) Becky will apoligize, and get a saintly hug in return.

    f) I still think the “Freaks” one-of-us ending is plausable.

  76. Tracer Bullet
    June 18th, 2007 at 6:56 am [Reply]

    (DT)GT: I realize this makes me a terrible person, but the first think I thought when I saw Monday’s panel two was, “Bergen-Belsen has a softball team?”

  77. Squawk
    June 18th, 2007 at 7:08 am [Reply]

    SM: “Things get wild again” means that next week Spider-man will get hit on the head with two bricks.

  78. Jlu
    June 18th, 2007 at 7:18 am [Reply]

    Not only does he remove his cowboy hat, but Blaze also dons the traditional black neckerchief of cowboy mourning.

  79. Trotzenbonnie
    June 18th, 2007 at 7:21 am [Reply]

    #75 – Lettuce
    Cast my vote for – f)

    Citizens demand Becky’s head photo-shopped onto a chicken and pasted into the last panel of today’s FOOB.

  80. Dennis Jimenez
    June 18th, 2007 at 7:22 am [Reply]

    52 – Pedophile – that means he loves to go walking – right?

  81. King Folderol
    June 18th, 2007 at 7:23 am [Reply]

    A3G – Hhe hocked that hat for that scarf.

    H&L – That’s not the future…that’s the dystopian past that the writers of Hi & Lois have concocted in their minds.

  82. colorado
    June 18th, 2007 at 7:29 am [Reply]

    Talking eyebrows and talking chests seem to be the Mark Trail theme today…Does no one ever speak from their frickin’ cakehole????

  83. Keg of Curd
    June 18th, 2007 at 7:35 am [Reply]

    Looks like Mark Tatulli is not entirely up to date on internet slang. Or if he is – that’s a horrible though.

  84. Inspector Dim
    June 18th, 2007 at 7:40 am [Reply]

    FOOB: Shan…non…pa…loo…za….

    Hagar the Horrible: Is it me, or is one of Hagar’s men trying to frag him? I can’t blame him. What do they have to show for all those years of raiding the civilized lands of Northern Europe? Hagar can’t even afford to move out of his crappy hut.

  85. Theominousoat
    June 18th, 2007 at 7:52 am [Reply]

    For the first time ever, Spiderman is exciting.

    Well, not Spiderman the character, Spiderman the comic. Don’t worry everyone, the webcrawler is still achieving epic quantities of dullness.

  86. Dean Booth (Tyler Bid Page)
    June 18th, 2007 at 7:55 am [Reply]

    BC: How Stupid Was He? (SFW).

  87. Dennis Jimenez
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:09 am [Reply]

    Blondie – Well, do I have to be the only one to make a tasteless doggy style reference?

    MW – In the meantime, you’re doing a wonderful job sitting on your bum – I’m so proud of you.

    RMMD – I’m gonna have an epileptic seizure looking at June’s top – but what a way to go.

    GF – Panel three – Rob practices his dick-tation.

  88. TybeeDawg
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:15 am [Reply]

    #87 – GF – Panel three – Rob practices his dick-tation.

    Maybe Jackelrod is guest artist for the day?

  89. Saxman
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:20 am [Reply]

    Ballard Street

    r.e. Male nipples in comics. Happy? Are you? because I’m not!

  90. Teem
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:25 am [Reply]

    My first thought on seeing Blaze enter the whatever hospital was to wonder what a member of The Village People is doing in A3G.
    May Blaze should be introduced to Rex Morgan.

  91. AtomicDog
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:25 am [Reply]

    Slylock – All the Count has to do is claim that he has invented a FTL (Faster Than Light) communicator.

  92. Dean Booth
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:28 am [Reply]

    FC: Bat Boy Lives (SFW, but kinda icky).

  93. Groovymarlin
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:30 am [Reply]

    “Blaze has finally taken off his moronic cowboy hat…”

    …but the ridiculous neck kerchief is never coming off!!

  94. Jamus The Bartender
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:32 am [Reply]

    Spidey: In the Marvel Universe, or this newsprint offshoot of same, throwing your wife in the air DOES constitute foreplay.

  95. TurtleBoy
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:38 am [Reply]

    re TDIET: I don’t think Maughta‘s mentioned it yet in this thread (I think she’s still asleep), but today’s strip is us, with the gender roles reversed to make it more Scadutolike.

  96. Chat Noir
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:39 am [Reply]

    A3G: I first saw that Luann’s closest relative is called Blaze and thought, “Where are Nitro, Turbo and the other American Gladiators?” Then I saw Blaze and thought he’s probably wondering the same thing.

  97. Meander
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:43 am [Reply]

    The Spider-man daily strips are terrible, and they always have been, but:

    That was the Definitive Mary Jane.

  98. willethompson
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:48 am [Reply]

    A3G: If someone’s trip is taking ‘too long,’ I generally do not invoke an unnamed deity for the protection of the laggard. I am dialing their cell number and screaming, “Hey, BOXCAR for brains! Where the SATURN are you? 2000 MARGOING free minutes and you can’t tell me why you’re three days late reporting in??”

    JP: Dropping $2.5 mil on a flat worth 1/3 of that is “sticking it” to Roger? Hey, Sam! C’mon and ‘stick it’ to ME! I’ve got a 1994 Ford truck with perforation rust and a power-steering unit that sound like a cat in heat! Bidding will start at $43,000, but you can lowball me for $35,000 AND you can have the rusted lawnmover and the bungee cords.

  99. Justafoob
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:49 am [Reply]

    Poor Apewill, caught between the dilemma of the helping the noble ‘tards and giving the shaft to the Beckster and GerOLD. She got the shaft from GerOLD and it wasn’t all that fun.

  100. finger quotin’ annie
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:49 am [Reply]

    OK, I don’t read “Judge Parker” except when it’s on this site, so forgive my confusion as I ask … is Sophie not, like, eight years old? She certainly looks about that young, and that was always my assumption, but if that’s the case, how could she even think about being “left alone” while the rest of her family (? — what exactly are the dynamics here?) is cavorting in their mansion-flat in Paris?

    This is why I never used to read ANY soaps … evidently my soap strip intelligence quotient is way down in the simpleton world of Mary Worth.

  101. Calico
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:58 am [Reply]

    #99 – Hell, maybe the thing at the mall will be twice as horrible as Beckster’s Halloween fiasco.

    Or, wait, wait, I’ve got it – Gewald will come down wif an awfuw viwus and Apwil will turn into Bill Bruford for an hour.

    Put all that Foobian rage into pounding the skins, doll, and you’ll feel allllll right.

  102. Calico
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:01 am [Reply]

    #100 – I think they are quite the Blended Family, which is cool IMO.
    I believe Sophie nad Ned are blood sisters, but have been adopted by Abby and Sam?
    Not sure about Marie-she may be a cousin to one of them.

    In 3G, I’m not certain as to how Eric is related to Nora. Anyone?

  103. Another anonymous lurker
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:04 am [Reply]

    “To honor the professional nature of the setting and somber tone of the occasion, Blaze has finally taken off his moronic cowboy hat”… bad move – he’s apparently turned into Liberace.

  104. Josh
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:07 am [Reply]

    #100 finger quotin’ annie — Since the Spencer/Driver blended clan are obscenely wealthy, if Sam had left without Sophie there would still be a team of servants left to see to the needs and safety of the latter. By “alone” she means “without others of my social standing.”

    #102 Calico — She’s the mother to his adored cancer-striken niece Katy, and thus either his sister or sister-in-law — probably the latter, since she shares a last name with him, and A3G doesn’t strike me as a strip that aims to rock the boat, marital-name-changing-wise.


  105. Kip W
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:08 am [Reply]

    Comic time is a very flexible thing. Judging from the last panel, Mr. Flagstone probably used to get high with Dagwood Bumstead. (#73: Would you believe these guys used to do a strip in the National Lampoon, at a time when it had still been funny in human memory?)

    LA is a perfect locale for the particularly odd flextime of continuing comics, as it spares the reader the spectacle of watching the seasons change through the course of a particularly long day. (“Gentle Uncle Ben”? Pete’s uncle was a bear!)

    (#40-41: Google on “Hi Hitler” — feeling lucky) (#56: Dilton is going a step beyond. wondering why one case takes “in” and the other takes “on.” Even when he’s banal, he’s miles beyond you and me.)

  106. Rebochan
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:11 am [Reply]

    Curtis: And now Ray Billingsly’s issues with the comics industry surface in the strip. Gentlemen, start your issues!

    FOOB: And because the rules of the FOOBiverse require that your first love is true love no matter what, naturally Gerald and April will get back together again because of the magic Very Special People!

    A3G: Why is the teenager wearing snowmen on her ears?

    MT: Hopefully the crisis will be resolved before anymore innocent ducks are hurt. I mean, innocent sexpots. I mean…hey look, birds!

    FW: Oh look! Lisa’s bald again! Must have started her chemo. Of course since we know she’s just going to die anyway thanks to Tom “I Spoil My Plot Points!” Batiuk, it’s just a sign of the impending doom…

    9CW: Oh look. More unicorn narrativeness. Less actual comicness. Hooray.

  107. AllieCat
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:15 am [Reply]

    Funny story. We bought a Sunday paper yesterday, which we hardly ever do, and I tore through the thing looking for the funnies, and they WEREN’T there. I expressed my displeasure and my husband said,

    “Let me sum it up for you – Cathy is still fat. When Garfield wants in, he wants in now. Doonesbury hates Bush and Mark Trail is still boring.”

    For a man who doesn’t follow the comics, he pretty well nailed it. But I hate having one of my hobbies reduced to that.

  108. Marked Trail
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:25 am [Reply]

    Mark Trail got is so wrong.


  109. Dennis Jimenez
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:37 am [Reply]

    Extra, Extra – MT gets wild hare up his ….

  110. Artist formerly known as Ben
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:39 am [Reply]


    FW: So Lisa’s trying to contact her birth son. Darin’s looking for his birth mother. You don’t suppose… No, that’s crazy.

    Cranky: For the record, the Who are still together, although at this point it’s just Pete, Roger, and a couple of ringers. Only one reason why the punchline doesn’t make sense.

    Luann: TJ is Christian Slater from “Very Bad Things.” Don’t go to Vegas with him, Brad.

    Archie: Dilton, you better not’ve spilled bongwater on Jughead’s George Carlin album.

    MW: “Oh hi Mary! Just sitting here not looking at porn. Woo, how ’bout those sick kids!”

    (DT)GT: Gil just gave a 12 word speech. Guess he’s done for the week. They’re all yours, Clambake.

    WofI: Atkins diet jokes already? These up-to-date topical references are making my head spin.

    Blondie: All the last panel needs is Daisy handing Blondie a cigarette.

  111. Hogen Mogen
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:42 am [Reply]

    MJ’s shadow in panel 6 doesn’t match her position. I knew there was something supernatural about her.

  112. SecretMargo
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:42 am [Reply]

    105: Kip — Well, I did say it ended in tears.

    (But I was just kidding! Kidding! It is terrible when one’s most random-seeming megrims turn out to be but pale shadows of reality’s goofiness. This reminds me of when two men were convicted in my hometown for tying another up in the woods and laying strips of bacon on the ground around him in hopes of enticing a bear to do their dirty work for them.)

  113. Chaz Larson
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:45 am [Reply]

    Did Mark Tatulli have to choose “fap” as his sound effect today?

    I wish he hadn’t. Reading that strip made me feel like a sex offender.

  114. Foobar
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:45 am [Reply]

    I had assumed that Hi’s hippie-trek was being imagined by Chip, so apparently mocking was the image therein. The tucked shirt, thigh-high mocassins and thin headband accentuating his receeding hairline are only the first of his crimes. Not pictured: skipping San Francisco because “it’s too hilly”and skipping Woodstock because “it’s too ethnic”.

  115. Hogen Mogen
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:47 am [Reply]

    A3G: Good God. Eric Mills joins Milton Avery on their little raft stranded in the North Atlantic. The waves pelt the small craft, throwing Milton to the side. Eric valliantly grabs him, preventing Milton from plunging into the unforgiving ocean. Eye to eye, locked for a moment in each other’s arms, suddenly, they kiss.

    “You saved me from falling in to the water,” Milton says, “but you can’t save a man from falling in love.”

  116. Chaz Larson
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:47 am [Reply]

    Meanwhile, Herb and Jamaal are revealed to be Borrowers or something; those Oreos are as big as their heads!

  117. Hogen Mogen
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:58 am [Reply]

    Hi & Lo: If Chip is like, 15-18, I’d say that Hi’s Euro-adventure probably would have happened around 1987. So, we’re not really talking about a 1960′s era hippie here. I for one would love to see the hilarity that could potentially ensue if this was developed into a rare H&L story arc. Hi’s college-age hitchhiking adventure would begin with getting a Corey Feldman haircut, an A-Ha cassette and a pair of parachute pants. I have no idea how the brown rubber boots fit in. That’s all it takes to survive the Swiss Alps, right? A few pseudo-Nixon/Johnson-era bumper stickers and plastic accessories and you can take on the old continent in a heartbeat. I think the fact that he’s completely alone is quite instrumental in understanding what’s really going on.

  118. Ned Ryerson
    June 18th, 2007 at 9:58 am [Reply]

    MW: Fund raising, my ass. Dr. Jeff is playing Mortal Combat with a friend in Vietnam!

  119. Uncle Lumpy
    June 18th, 2007 at 10:01 am [Reply]

    #47 Dub not Dubya, #56 S.S.B. #102 Calico

    Marie is the Parkers’ maid; hence washing up the dishes and serving Sam coffee. They’re all pals, though, cuz the Parkers is jes’ folks, an’ don’ put on no high-falutin’ airs. Abbey gave Marie time off to tend a sick brother, and picked her up at the airport when she came back: yesterday morning in strip time, and December 19 in ours.

  120. Tweeks_Coffee
    June 18th, 2007 at 10:01 am [Reply]


    Blondie: I see Blondie knows how to keep herself busy while Dagwood’s away. Even without those overtones, the image of Daisy sitting in bed like that disturbs me rather deeply.

    DT: Awesome, now we’re going to get exposed to Dick Tracy doing the duties of a nurse in a retirement home! What could possibly be more thrilling than watching him guard an old man? They can spend hours watching Jeopardy, maybe even go for a walk down to the local Hometown Buffet!

    FC: Why the heck is Billy doing arm curls with a bat?

    HotC: The fact that I’ve seen the term “fap” used as a term for masturbation makes this a very disturbing strip indeed.

    MW: What the… has Jeff been in the backroom during the entire Vera storyline? I certainly wouldn’t be stunned if Mary’s been keeping him locked in there ever since she brought him back from vietnam, though.

  121. commodorejohn
    June 18th, 2007 at 10:02 am [Reply]

    9CL – Edda telepathically flips someone off.

    A3G – ATTN: Dean Booth – your next comic entry need only add an S to Nora’s second thought bubble. Also, good gravy, there are a lot of Margos around lately.

    Archie – The ALGJU3K is beginning to grasp the concept of language quirks – however, its “punchline setup” module is in dire need of upgrade.

    B.C. – How about we start referring to it as Not B.C.?

    BB – “Droppo, you are the laziest man on Mars!”

    Crankshaft – What on Earth am I missing here?

    DT – It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a Baron Grue.

    FOOB – Goddammit, Johnston, can’t you let at least one of your ladies have a happy, healthy relationship with a guy who’s not a dickless wonder? Also, I know you don’t think much of imperfect people, but the mentally handicapped don’t actually look like putty sculptures.

    FW – And thus great boring things are set in motion.

    GF – Taking a page from Mark Trail, Rob speaks from his personal regions.

    GT – The Lady Mudlarks have pulled a reverse Sampson – they cut their hair and haven’t lost since.

    HOTC – “ffffFAP.” Not the wisest choice of onomatopoeia.

    H&L – Childrens’ Day is May 5th, but it’s not celebrated in the USA. On the other hand, we have Memorial Day and July 4th and a handful of other holidays nobody else celebrates.

    JP – “Except for being greedy and ruthless, she was OK!”

    MT – FoJ impending.

    MW – Did we really have to go back to Dr. Jeff and Mary? I liked Vera better.

    NS – Disgusting urine-related plays on computer terminology? Gee, how did I ever live without?

    Pluggers – Amusingly, the samples lady looks quite a bit like the samples lady at the grocery store where I work. (Hint: there’s no reason to buy lunch on the days she’s working.)

    SFx – On a technical level, the Count could have received a greeting from aliens and sent off a reply, and that would count as a conversation. Just sayin’.

    SM – What is that thing on Peter’s upper lip?

  122. Mumbles
    June 18th, 2007 at 10:08 am [Reply]

    FOOB: Apparently the school district let Jesse Jackson interior-decorate the special ed class: “Yes We Can” wallpaper, and probably an “I am Somebody” carpet. From Martha Stewart Home’s “Patronizing Platitudes” line.

    Also it looks like Iris is in the class, from the last panel.

    Shannon looks like a real estate broker in the first panel.

    (DT)GT: Tracer Bullet (#76), lol. And the streak of “these freaks look better without hair” comes to a screeching halt.

  123. finger quotin’ annie
    June 18th, 2007 at 10:11 am [Reply]

    Thanks Josh and Calico for the clarifications!

    Still doesn’t entirely explain why an 8-year-old needs to come along as the “insightful” one on the trip, but I guess compared to Abbey and Neddy, even the family dog would look pretty smart.

  124. A Nony Mous
    June 18th, 2007 at 10:11 am [Reply]

    Dr. Jeff isn’t looking at porn or playing games. He’s busy sending out his fund-raising letters.

    You know, “my died and left me billions of dollars, but I need your help getting it out of the country.”

  125. AhClem
    June 18th, 2007 at 10:12 am [Reply]

    JP – Marie is Sam and Abby’s sex slave servant. Why she suddenly looks like she’s 14 with a festering case of acne is anybody’s guess. Probably from reading too much FOOB.

  126. sally
    June 18th, 2007 at 10:22 am [Reply]

    I don’t have time to read through the comments to see if someone else has already said this, but what the hell is Mary Jane wearing? It looks like a nursing gown. Are we about to hear the patter of little spider feet?

  127. Calico
    June 18th, 2007 at 10:27 am [Reply]

    #123 – You got that right, as Ronnie Van Zant would say.
    Don’t know if you saw this one, but Neddy gave a ring to Sophie before Ned went to Paris-cash value approx. 40K USD.
    Maybe Soph uses the magic ring to “see things” with her “critical insight.”

    #118 – Or Second Life, so he can escape from Mary even for a short while.

  128. Fried Froid w/ Squid
    June 18th, 2007 at 10:35 am [Reply]

    Comic history:

    ” Fap! ” was the exclaimation uttered by Major Hoople in Our Boarding House.

  129. Fried Froid w/ Squid
    June 18th, 2007 at 10:40 am [Reply]

    Sunday’s Judge Parker –

    Sophie’s expression as Sam says he lovers her and enjoys her company is very disturbing… as if she’s heard this before and something wonderful happened… eeuuggghhh!!!

  130. Dean Booth
    June 18th, 2007 at 10:51 am [Reply]

    MW: “Talk to the Hand!” (NSFW).

    #121: Here ya go, cj. I added a little A3G body language in the 3rd panel.

  131. commodorejohn
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:04 am [Reply]

    #130 Dean Booth – Perfect.

  132. Jym
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:12 am [Reply]

    =68= H&L (Grinderman): The “narcs” are still pretty obvious. They infiltrated my bike activist group around the time of the Republican National Convention and said stuff like, “It’s anarchy, dude!” Their “intelligence” was recently release by court order, and it’s downright hilarious.

    =105= NatLamp (Kip W.): ObComics: The last thing that was funny about National Lampoon was the funny pages, when Shary Flenniken was the editor. There’s an informative book out, A Stupid and Futile Gesture, detailing the decline of that once-funny magazine (executive summary: the talent went elsewhere and P.J. O’Rourke took over).

  133. queek
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:12 am [Reply]

    from the Wiki page on the web-comic Sexy Losers:

    “The most significant contribution the comic made to popular culture has been the popularization of the onomatopoeia “fap” for the sound of male masturbation. While Clay did not invent it (the source is VIZ Media’s translation of Heartbroken Angels), his use of “fap” has led it to become an almost universal term online. The term was first used in his third comic produced in April 28, 1999 and appears to be the first appearance of the term on the Internet.[12] In a similar vein, Clay used the onomatopoeia “schlick” for the sound of female masturbation.”

  134. Tom Ames
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:21 am [Reply]

    Adding my 2 cents: I just turned FORTY and I was a child of hippies. They even took me to the Stones concert at Altamont when I was 2 y.o.)

  135. gh
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:21 am [Reply]


    I spent two sleepless nights since the Saturday strip, in fear and trembling that I would be forced to witness a bald Paris this morning, a sight from which even I, a seasoned veteran, would run screaming. Luckily the Thorpmeisters drew back from the brink. Perhaps the Saturday “what if” was their way of saying, “Don’t get cocky. We can snuff you out like that”. Then they fly back to Guantanamo and their day jobs.

  136. queek
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:23 am [Reply]

    now that we have *that* out of the way:

    NonSequitur was hilarious today. More subtle than usual, but still a wonderful slam.

    Jump Start was sweet. “What a wonderful world it would be.”

    MG&G was amusing, if somewhat dated.

    Pibgorn does indeed have the RHoJ, and not only knocked out her opponent, but knocked herself right into another dimension! Wonder if she gets to keep the sword? If so, will the female samurai have to follow Pib across the dimensions to retrieve it? Will an insufferablely smug unicorn be involved? Does the onna-bushi smell of sunflowers? The mind, it boggles.

  137. gh
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:31 am [Reply]

    #95 TurtleBoy [and Maughta] –

    If you’re saying you as in “We sent that one in” then hearty congrats all ’round!

  138. juggernaut
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:33 am [Reply]

    I do do do do do DO dig Hi’s authentic black hippie belt, and the way he tucks his snazzy button down shirt into his pants (and his pants into his boots, for that matter). I can see why the conservatives were so afraid of these commie pinko freaks ever taking over the country……….

  139. mel
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:40 am [Reply]

  140. Calico
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:47 am [Reply]

    #132 – P. J. “Not from FC” O’Rourke – God help me.

    He and Dave Marsh were two I could have easily done without during their tenure at RS magazine.

    #132 – Perfect! Hee hee.

    #134 – “I spend a little time on the mountain, I spend a little time on the hill…”

  141. commodorejohn
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:48 am [Reply]

    I don’t know, I find P.J. O’Rourke to be quite funny, at least in his books. Then again, just being funny doesn’t make you a good magazine editor. Never having read National Lampoon, I’ll defer to those who have on this question.

  142. gnome de blog
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:51 am [Reply]

    JP: Unlike the other characters, Neddy and Sophie age, albeit slowly. When we first encountered them10 or 20 years ago, Sophie was about 8 and crippled. Neddy was maybe 15 and dressed like a nun in civvies. Neddy is now 18, and Sophie about 12. As Josh and others have pointed out, she’s clearly the smartest one in the family.

    Marie has been Abbey’s maid for about 40 years. She always wore a uniform with a little lace cap until Barreto took over the strip and changed how everybody looked.

    H&L: I’d say Hi is in his early 40s. His wife has a teen-aged son and a 21-year-old brother. It’s possible (I know a guy who has an aunt and an uncle younger than he is), but it doesn’t happen very often.

  143. Skunkard
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:51 am [Reply]

    Where is Josh getting these Sunday Spiderman strips? Is he scanning them? Since Chron stopped showing Sunday strips, I’ve been unable to find Sunday’s comic on the web.

  144. 2xMartini
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:51 am [Reply]

    I wish Mark Trail would skip all the “plot development” and just have him unleashing his fists of justice on anyone he comes into contact with.

  145. Trotzenbonnie
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:54 am [Reply]

    #128 – FFw/S
    And Don Martin.

    Honestly, if ‘fap’ is an onomatopoeic for snapping one’s baloney, may I suggest the use of a better lubricant?

  146. Kip W
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:55 am [Reply]

    #121: BC (commodorejohn) I think we should call it A.D. (After Demise)

    #128: Egad! Haf-kaf… I remember it well, FF. (In fact, a friend gave me a scrapbook full of 1943 panels of “Our Boarding House” and “Out Our Way” which I’m slowly scanning — slow because the yellow-brown newsprint and glue spots take so much fixing up.) The recent use of the word makes reading the old Hooples sort of… well, never mind.

    132: Jym, I’ll keep an eye out. I was interested to read Tony Hendra’s account of the decline of NatLamp in Going Too Far.

    R=R – Why, Mister Gumbo! Without your hair, you’re a Don Martin character!

  147. nsr
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:58 am [Reply]

    What’s with Ozzie in Mutts? He’s feeding Earl ice cream! Is he trying to kill him? The presence of dog bones in the ice cream should be a tip-off. But what’s Earl know? I always thought Ozzie looked kind of evil.

  148. commodorejohn
    June 18th, 2007 at 11:59 am [Reply]

    #143 Skunkard – Chron hasn’t stopped showing Sunday strips. You have to manually change the URL to reflect Sunday’s date, but it’s always been that way.

  149. Phoebe
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:02 pm [Reply]

    There are two ways I could convery Margo’s expression in panel one: 1, “Blaze? God, not that hick.” 2, “Wait a minute, we’re supposed to be concerned for Tommie’s well being?”

  150. Phoebe
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:04 pm [Reply]

    EDIT: Woe is me! I meant LuAnn, not Tommie! It’s so easy to confuse them. Both have recessive genes, both are hellishly BORING…

  151. Joe Bftsplk
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:04 pm [Reply]

    Blondie – Poor Dagwood’s position in his own household has declined to the point where not only is Blondie just as happy to be sleeping with the dog as with him, but his children are halfway through dinner before they even notice that he’s gone. The previous panel would have had them looking quizzically at the empty chair and saying, “Wait a minute, isn’t there usually some goofy-looking guy sitting there?”

  152. Doola!
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:07 pm [Reply]

    Good to see that Blaze was able to take some time away from spying on Jack Tripper and his sexy girl roommates to make it down to the hospital…

  153. kodijack
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:12 pm [Reply]

    I fear for this whole Internet thing when in the span of two weeks Skylock Fox was converted to porn and Blondie decided to bed her dog while her husband was out of town. Whats next – Luann decides to keep her brother for herself rather than whoring him out to beat on her chief rival?

  154. gh
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:14 pm [Reply]

    So DtM
    now stands for Dennis the Motivational Speaker?

  155. SatanicMechanic
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:16 pm [Reply]

    Hi, presumably never having gotten high has a disturbing lack of high heels. Come on, man, they’re supposed to be cowboy boots!! In fact, thats a disturbing lack of all things kind.

    I have to admit, he does kind of look like Eddie from rocky Horror Picture show, with that flesh colored line across his misshapen forehead.

  156. AppleGirl
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:20 pm [Reply]

    FBOFW – Is the wedding over? Sorry, I must’ve passed out for the weekend. Last I heard, Julia was telling Asshat to go for it. Where are we?

    Red Greenback, if this is California, you sure know how to make that Mini Winnie fly. Thanks for the great ride. Let me know how much I owe you for gas.

  157. The Spectacular Spider-Brick
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:24 pm [Reply]

    I call ur-snark on Heart’s sound effect being reminiscent of Sexy Losers and on “Dropo, you’re the laziest man on Mars!”

  158. commodorejohn
    June 18th, 2007 at 12:31 pm [Reply]

    Ah, dammit. That’ll teach me to post before reading everyone else’s snark.

  159. Brent
    June 18th, 2007 at 2:05 pm [Reply]

    For all of you thinking dirty thoughts about Daisy and Blondie remember this one important fact.

    Daisy is a BITCH!

    Now go think other dirty thoughts about Daisy and Blondie.

  160. Cornwhacker
    June 18th, 2007 at 2:32 pm [Reply]

  161. Cornwhacker
    June 18th, 2007 at 2:33 pm [Reply]

    Crap. here’s the link. May 7, 2004

  162. Steve S
    June 18th, 2007 at 3:48 pm [Reply]

    “Some female”? Who talks that way? “Salutations, spouse. You are a particularly visibly attractive member of the female gender during this rotation of the Earth.” The computers are writing Spider Man now.

  163. grapesaresour
    June 18th, 2007 at 4:33 pm [Reply]

    A3G: “Sign some documents??? But then they’ll find out I’m illiterate!”

  164. Stev0
    June 18th, 2007 at 6:36 pm [Reply]

    The lesson of today’s Spiderman: With great power comes great sex.

  165. joel
    June 18th, 2007 at 8:06 pm [Reply]

    Spidey’s last panel would imply that the sex life of Peter and M. J. Parker is less wild than Peter’s thrill-a-minute crime fighting career.

    Who says marriage dulls the romance?

  166. genevieve
    June 19th, 2007 at 1:07 am [Reply]

    I am completely scarred by that Spiderman cartoon. I thought Daisy sharing Blondie’s bed was bad, but now I’m going to have nightmares!

  167. Christian
    June 19th, 2007 at 1:30 am [Reply]

    “It makes me wonder what happened to Stan Lee; it’s hard for me to believe that he’s actually the one writing the comic. ”

    Try watching his films. Or reading his new comics… he’s been bad for ages without talent to steal

  168. Starvin Artist
    July 7th, 2007 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

    Without his hat on, Blaze’s true identity has been revealed as Quentin Crisp’s younger brother (or sister).

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