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Blondie, 3/22/26

The saddest part of this strip is the throwaway panel, which reveals that Blondie has a whole spring cleaning bit lined up to unleash on her husband, only for it to be totally short-circuited by Dagwood’s avoiding-spring-cleaning bit, so they just end up mad at each other. Imagine if she had told him about laundry-robics! Maybe he would’ve been into it, maybe it would have become a beloved family tradition, but I guess we’ll never know. Dagwood’s spring cleaning chore being painting the house isn’t sad per se, but it is confusing.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 3/22/26

I’m beginning to think that a decade of sheltering inside her vast Hollywood mansion has left Mae Mae/Lorna unprepared for actually living in the world incognito. “He’ll never put two and two together, and certainly there’s no way he can hear me, speaking at full volume, in this relatively small and otherwise empty hotel cafe! My secret is safe … forever.

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Mary Worth, 3/21/26

“My heart … my delicate heart … too weak to fly to see my injured beloved. Time to heal myself using the best technique known to man: taking a pill and then tucking into an enormous bowl of hearty chili. It’s an old family recipe: you cook a pound and a half of ground beef, add barbecue sauce and exactly two beans, and serve!”

Blondie, 3/21/26

“Yeah, it turns out that every day of the year — every moment, really — is a crushing, depressing chore. But at least there’s death waiting for us, right? At least there’s death. [suddenly remembers he’s a character in a long-running comic strip who hasn’t aged appreciably in nearly a century] oh NO”

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Well, well, well … looks like it’s that time again … comment of the week time, that is:

“I, for one, always type my scam emails with my fingers held beyond the keyboard itself. Palm-typing, I call it. I make a lot of typos, but that’s unrelated.” –Lauralot

Also time for these hilarious runners up!

“They’re not removing their glasses for comfort. They want to be sure they don’t accidentally see each other.” –Nevin, on Patreon

“I was looking forward to Rustic Romance. But, depending on how desperate Lorna is to keep incognito, I could settle for Homespun Homicide.” –MKay

“I’m sorry, I’m not buying that ‘Fergus Murphy’ and ‘Mae Mae Clodfelter’ are from the same town or whatever. Pick a down-home, banjo-pluckin’ rural background and run with it, you can’t do Co. Kerry and West Virginia.” –Dan

“Henrietta. Get yourself to the best chicken doctor around. If your rhamphotheca is that rubbery, you’re at high risk of necrosis of the periosteum. Do you want to lose your upper and lower mandibles?” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“In happier times, Loretta used to joke that if she replaced the bread tag with a twist tie, then Leroy would starve to death. Yet now, years later, she can’t even find satisfaction in being proven right.” –Guts Dozier

“Anyway, it turns out fleas really like these big antique oak drawing boards and will pay top dollar. They use them for parade grounds, combat exercises, and basic training camps. Not sure why they’re readying themselves for conquest. Also not sure where they’re getting their dollars, but they spend just as good as any other blood-stained buck.” –Voshkod

“Power move of Thirsty to wait until they both got to the office to tell Hi this.” –matt w

Head count? Complete heads or pieces as well?! Ha, I kid, but seriously, I think we just committed a war crime out there.” –pugfuggly

“Is this supposed to be an episode of sci-fi where we feel sympathy for a child who will never grow up because she realizes that there might be a more sinister aspect to what she perceives as a friendly beam of light from a sun in the early stages of going nova? That, or two dull suburbanites discussing setting the thermostat? I’m going with the former.” –Hibbleton

“I hate today’s strip for two reasons — first, for being so weird that I felt compelled to look back to work out what the hell is going on (Why is everyone writing on paper and talking about what type of animal they are? Why is R.E.A.R. stamped on the book cover? Are they playing some weird furry sex version of D&D?), and secondly for being a complete letdown when I actually went back to check. It’s so dull I’m not even going to bother explaining it, which is not how you should describe the set-up to the phrase ‘I’m a Neon-Cliff-Fox and I’m good at rappelling!’” –Schroduck

“‘That loud machine is interfering with my enjoyment of all the loud machines’ is certainly … what’s above a first-world problem?” –Vice President John Adams

“Where’s your leaf blower? I’ve got a better question: How come you have what appears to be a half-car garage?” –Weaselboy

“There’s no project. This dude just sets up that table and laptop and spouts vague work vernacular. It’s always encouraging, though. How did he know Alice’s name? Oh, he knows all the names. Like a muffin?” –A Grave Mind

“‘What turned you around?’ ‘Oh, that’s a long story. And it’s about to get even longer!’” –Bob Tice

“I’ve always assumed that, in keeping with its art style, Alice was always meant to be some sort of vague, unsettling, Eastern-European version of expressionist morality play. If we were to continue following this particular episode, we’d see Alice retreat into her office, with her name and a job title like ‘Happiness Injector’ on a plaque, only to find her inside vivisecting kittens while off-key circus music plays in the background. As the camera dollies closer to her, she’d pause, look at the audience, and say, ‘Well, where did you think marshmallows came from?’ as the image dissolves into a clip of an atomic bomb exploding.” –Glarryg

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