Archive: Gearhead Gertie

Post Content

Gearhead Gertie, 7/17/25

Oh, man, the domestic drama in the Gearhead household just gets more fraught! Gertie’s husband Harold, in a desperate attempt to introduce a new topic of conversation into his life, has dragged his wife to an art show, and you have to imagine that there was a brief moment where he really believed he had pulled it off, believed that he had managed to awaken something in Gertie’s soul when he brought her face to face with the greatest examples of human creativity. Sadly, what she actually took away from the experience was “What if we got more NASCAR shit, for people to look at, in our house?” Gertie may not know much about art, but she knows what she likes, and what she likes is having Dale Earnhardt’s death car, acquired and restored at great expense, hanging on the wall of her living room.

Pardon My Planet, 7/17/25

Man, what the hell, do you think vampires would ever in a million years wear cross necklaces? Of course not! They would burn their skin upon touching it! These are just goths! Goths with deep respect for Madonna’s iconic cone bra!

Rex Morgan, M.D., 7/17/25

I gotta say, we’re all pretty used to nothing really exciting happening in Rex Morgan these days, and so when this plot about Truck’s maybe-son started out, I don’t think any of us would’ve pegged “Truck finds out he got cucked by his own drummer” as the dramatic conclusion. I’m trying to parse out what his facial expression in the first panel is conveying … excitement? Respect? I hope we dive ever more deeply into his psychosexual landscape over the rest of the week.

Post Content

Gearhead Gertie, 7/3/25

I am if nothing mercurial, and do you know what I’ve decided? I like the Gearhead Gerties where the focus is on Gertie’s perpetually put-upon husband. I’m done feeling bad for him. He had to have known what he signed up for. His wife is Gearhead Gertie, for Pete’s sake! I like his grumpy little face in the second panel as he endures this latest NASCAR-related indignity. Ha ha, he has to watch TV sticking way up in the air, for NASCAR reasons that I don’t fully understand!

Pluggers, 7/3/25

Over the past several years, I reached an age at which some of my parents and in-laws have reached ages at which stairs, and the need to accommodate their lives minimizing the number of times they go up and down them, became an important thing we all had to think about. Stairs, man! You think you’ll be able to use them forever with ease, but I’m here to tell you: that’s probably not true. Anyway, today’s featured plugger is not yet at the stage where he can’t use the stairs, but it’s a lot harder to use them than it used to be, and he knows in his bones it won’t ever get any easier, and every time he goes up, the little pep talk he gives himself needs to go a little harder in order to do its job. In its quiet way, this is the most genuinely harrowing Pluggers panel since Rhino-man hocked his TV.

Hi and Lois, 7/3/25

You know I’m on the record as being in favor of Hi and Lois depicting “Thirsty” Thurston as a lovable drunk, but I think it’s a little too on the nose for him to just be blurting out his various disorders like this. “I’m getting addicted to online gambling!” “I let my lawn and my hair get so unkempt because I’m very depressed!” “My wife doesn’t love me and I don’t think she has for a long time!” C’mon, let us use our imagination a little here.

Mary Worth, 7/3/25

“Remember the last time they took a father-daughter vacation together, and they almost died in a cruise ship disaster? I think this one will finish them off for good.”

Post Content

Slylock Fox, 6/12/25

Years ago, I read a book about the Velvet Revolution in Czechoslovakia, and one of my strongest memories of it is that after the Communist dictatorship had been overthrown, even in their euphoria the leaders of the broad alliance that had pulled off this transformation — which included conservatives and liberals, free marketeers and social democrats, unionists and Czech and Slovak nationalists — began to realize that they would soon be political opponents, but allowed themselves to enjoy the moment of victory together before that turn came. The story of Slylock Fox is in many ways the story of how the animals came into conflict with one another after overthrowing humanity, and how they learned to manage that conflict. But sometimes you get a glimpse into the origins of their society, like the little story captured here. These guys are free, they magically know how to operate a motor vehicle, and they’ve just violently killed and eaten all the zookeepers who’ve been holding them captive their entire lives. They have a world to build, and that’s important, but in some ways it will never get better than it is on this night.

Dick Tracy, 6/12/25

Sam, not to tell you how to do your job, which I assume is disparaging suspects without much evidence, but if the way you want to disparage this suspect is by calling him a drunk, you should be making a little “drinky” gesture in front of your mouth, with your thumb and pinky extended to make it look like your hand is a bottle of liquor. What you’re doing is a “crazy” gesture, which is not the same thing at all!

Gearhead Gertie, 6/12/25

Sorry, Harold, you know I am usually sympathetic to your plight, but how could you possibly be asking this right now. Your wife is named “Gearhead Gertie!” You’ve been married to her for a decade! You know this is the only sport you’re allowed to watch. You know that very well.