Metapost: COTW ASAP
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Real quick: it’s comment of the week time!
“Steve, I accidentally ordered too many birdcages. Try to upsell any customer who comes in to buy bird food. Especially if they bring their bird in with them!” –Weaselboy
And also hilarious runners up time!
“Yes, this is a convoluted set-up, one requiring that Ed and Ralph play a game they’ve never shown any interest in at a community center they’ve never been shown attending and the twins to also be at the same community center they’ve never been shown attending and having nothing better to do either there or elsewhere, but all of that doesn’t matter because the punchline just isn’t that good.” –TheDiva
“Maybe the animal people are just hard of hearing. Even though Ma Barker is loudly complaining about the scam clam to Slylock Fox a mere two feet away, people are still lining up to give away their money.” –Guts Dozier
“I know how frustrating that can be. That’s why I switched to ‘Organ Blender’ hollowpoint rounds.” –RogerBW
“New Bird Lady gets all the attention here, but Roz tells a whole story with those bored, sad eyes. This is not the first time she’s met someone who thought they finally killed Shoe. It seems to be a regular occurrence. Now Roz is going to have to help this lady work through her trauma and grief, even though no one in this town tips over 15%.” –Nevin, on Patreon
“I for one hope the Ghost Cat is precisely what their name indicates: the spirit of a normal house cat whose freedom from earthly bonds allows them to achieve hitherto undreamed-of levels of idleness.” –Hergen
“With a lifespan of 50 to 70 years, that parrot will easily outlive Ian, and will probably outlive Toby. And oh, the stories it will have to tell. The boring, tedious stories. Okay, maybe it won’t outlive them thanks to an accident where it flies into a window in a desperate attempt at sweet freedom. –Tabby Lavalamp
“I like the little touches that Chip brings time that outfit, like keeping that tie super loose. He’s not just grandpa, he’s drunk grandpa!” –pugfuggly
“Sincere kudos to the Dennis the Menace artist who kept everything about the art generic 1950s, except for updating the light switch to a touchpad dimmer. A+, way to let us know you’re still in the game, buddy!” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV
“‘Now, when Ozob broke into that auto body shop, did he take anything?’ ‘Well, as you can see from today’s first panel, that’s kind of a gray area!’” –Bob Tice
“We Love Pets is having its annual bone sale! Time to stock up.” –Everything Is Better With Monkeys
“I got it … in normal human speech ‘bald’ often comes out as ‘ball,’ with the d sound buried, as few people really pop that final consonant, and in this context of buying meat near thanksgiving, particularly after the word ‘butter,’ I just assumed he’d actually said ‘butterball.’ The confusion would only arise if he had written his request, but if he actually wrote the word down, you might question his cognitive abilities, or consider his written language might have been affected by a stroke. Anyhow, how many pounds?” –Chance
“Half of Gearhead Gertie strips are ‘The death of Dale Earnhardt was the greatest tragedy in human history’ and the other half are ‘lol fast cars go crash.’ It was only a matter of time before the threads got confusingly crossed.” –Schroduck
“Sarge’s newest recruits are his younger self pulled to the present through the timestream, his evil mirror universe doppelganger, and his illegitimate son.” –ectojazzmage
“Is the county CALLED Nearly, or is this a dig? The Almost State Fair. The Not Quite World’s Fair.” –MKay
“Mary brings a third muffin for Toby’s ‘guest’ but after the big reveal realizes that listening devices alone are not enough. It’s time she installed some cameras in Toby’s apartment.” –Hibbleton
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