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Mary Worth, 4/17/26

Oh, I’m sorry, did you think there were stakes to this storyline? Did you think that losing two hundred thousand American dollars might have some material impact on Harvey’s life? Well, sorry, chumps, this motherfucker’s got ascot money and the whole episode is just kind of embarrassing for him to admit to his daughter, and probably more for horniness reasons than monetary ones. You know what, I’m not just glad “Trixie” escaped the compound; I’m actively glad the money went to a Southeast Asia-based crime lord, who’s at least showing some business acumen by building the compound in the first place.

Andy Capp, 4/17/26

Flo has never really had much character development over the past seven decades beyond “sick of Andy’s bullshit,” so I think today’s strip represents a small victory for feminism, even if the characterization offered is “really smug about not exercising.”

Hagar the Horrible, 4/17/26

“He knows what you Vikings did to Yorkshire and the Shetland Islands — and he wants revenge.”

Blondie, 4/17/26

Notice how Blondie doesn’t recommend Dagwood invest time and energie in their marriage? I mean, what’s the point, really? Anyway, she’s got her Sudokus, so whatever.

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Dennis the Menace, 4/16/26

OK, since I complained about yesterday’s “exciting” tax panel from Pluggers, I have to praise this one. You know what’s exciting? When you’ve been up for three days straight trying to do your taxes and you’ve missed the deadline by several hours but you can’t stop because you’ll lose your momentum. “Please, let him rest!” begs Dennis. “He does so much for us!” It’s not very menacing of him but I’ll allow it.

Blondie, 4/16/26

I really like Dagwood’s facial expression in the second panel. It’s like he’s thinking “Oh, am I being cruised? Is this the cruising section of the park? Not really my thing but I guess you should try everything once.” By the time we get to panel three he’s disappointed that he misread the situation.

Heathcliff, 4/16/26

“Heathcliff sees a therapist” is an occasional bit in this strip, and I don’t care for it because I really don’t think it’s a match for his character. Heathcliff may have any number of real psychological issues, but I think he’s pretty happy with himself and lacks the desire to change that usually drives people to therapy. Anyway, despite what the therapist says, I appreciate the fact that today makes it clear he doesn’t take the process very seriously.

Crankshaft, 4/16/26

OH WE’RE ALLOWED TO START THINKING ABOUT A SCENARIO WHERE CRANKSHAFT SUFFERS A MASSIVE HEART ATTACK NOW? LIKE, CANONICALLY, IN THE WORLD OF THE STRIP, THAT’S SOMETHING THAT’S ON THE TABLE? GOOD TO KNOW, GOOD TO KNOW

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Pluggers and Hi and Lois, 4/15/26

Look, I actually feel strongly about this: excitement is very much not “getting [your] income tax return submitted on time.” I guess racing to complete your return could be exciting, but that’s not what’s being portrayed in today’s Pluggers. The emotion we’re seeing is instead “the satisfaction of a job well done.” Now, in Hi and Lois we’re seeing other forms of excitement around today’s big deadline: the excitement of realizing that you are definitely not going to get your taxes filed on time and you’ve moved one step closer to just failing out of polite society completely, for instance, or the excitement of seeing your neighbor and coworker screw up once again, keeping you on top as the “sensible one” in the friendship/office. But that plugger isn’t excited. He’s smug. There’s a difference!

Rex Morgan, M.D., 4/15/26

Oh, hey, were you worried that Rex Morgan, M.D., was getting kind of interesting, as Mud Mountain Murphy struggled to keep a secret? Well, don’t worry, we’re instead going to be focusing for a bit on how suspicious diner guy can’t hit his sales numbers in today’s uncertain economy. This probably won’t ever get interesting at all, and if it does, well, we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.