Post Content

Shoe, 11/13/25

“Plus I forgot we live in a tree! Like where am I even supposed to go? The end of that branch is maybe fifteen feet away, tops!”

Garfield, 11/13/25

Garfield is of course the title character of the comic strip Garfield, making him by far the most important being in his own narrative universe. You might think it’s depraved that these foodstuffs are begging him to not restrain his appetites, but being consumed by such a divine figure would surely be the apex of their existence.

Pluggers, 11/13/25

I feel like this is the most at odds I’ve ever seen a Pluggers caption and cartoon be. Look at that bear-man’s face! He doesn’t think bacon is the only critical part of a BLT. He thinks he’s made a huge mistake!

Mother Goose and Grimm, 11/13/25

Look, after years of reading some not-so-great comic strips, I think I’ve given up on demanding that everyone recognize that the comics are a visual medium. But I think we can at least all agree that the comics are not an audible medium and write jokes for them accordingly.

Post Content

Dick Tracy, 11/12/25

New Dick Tracy storyline, everybody! This one involves (a) a guy named “Rojo Ozob,” and (b) a sheriff who accidentally drove over a cliff. OR WAS IT AN ACCIDENT? Well, Dick Tracy seems to think so, based on this news story he’s looking at on his phone (?). Honestly, Dick is a big city cop, he doesn’t have time to worry about sheriffs out in the sticks, where there are cliffs everywhere you can just drive off of, like there aren’t even any proper guardrails. Get your shit together, country folk, Dick has got urban crimes to keep track of.

The Lockhorns, 11/12/25

Ah, an extremely rare Lockhorns where both Leroy and Loretta are smiling! Truly the one thing that brings these two together is some petty gripe about the world that they express through an elaborate act-out.

Alice, 11/12/25

Yeah, Alice, don’t lie to the kid! When you turn off the TV the people inside die. They die and their souls are immediately transported to hell. The only way to save them from eternal torment is by always watching your favorite shows!

Post Content

Family Circus, 11/11/25

One of my favorite unintentional running Family Circus bits is when panels drawn decades ago that depict the Keane Kids in a car have seatbelts added in extremely half-assed ways. Just look at that shoulder strap vaguely dangling across Billy’s torso; he doesn’t even appear to have a lap belt, and there really is no way to overemphasize the degree to which none of this setup would restrain him in an accident. Presumably Big Daddy Keane knows this, and is more and more tempted to slam on the brakes and hurl his son towards the windshield as his blather becomes increasingly irritating. If only it weren’t for this blasted traffic!

Hi and Lois, 11/11/25

I was an early advocate for Hi and Lois returning Thirsty to his roots as a comical alcoholic, but even I have to admit that “Eat food? Produced via agriculture? No thanks, I’d rather drink an intoxicating beverage” may be going too far.

Mary Worth, 11/11/25

Similarly, I’ve had no complaints as Mary Worth does more and more animal-themed storylines, but “Ian acquires an erotic rival in the form of a parrot” is probably the point where I would start to register some mild complaints.

Shoe, 11/11/25

“Do you understand how much my spirit yearns to be free of this corrupt matter? Take this knife. Sacrifice the man that clothes me. Do it now.”