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Hi and Lois, 11/23/15

Awww, looks like somebody has a case of the Mondays, if by “a case of the Mondays” you mean “a nagging realization that life is an joyless cycle of repetitive, meaningless tasks.” I think that’s what most people mean by it, right?

B.C., 11/23/15

B.C., meanwhile, reminds us that the Flagstons’ middle-class suburban ennui is itself a privilege, as many others see life not as a ceaseless loop of drudgery but a straight line that will be ending very, very soon.

Gasoline Alley, 11/23/15

That goodness, all that rude chatter is over and we can get what we came for: little kids telling weird ahistoric jokes on stage. Are the “!”s over our young Squanto and Pilgrim meant to represent solid, emotive method acting on their part, or are they genuinely surprised at Boog’s punchline? Is he improvising? Can you imagine children doing an improv Thanksgiving show? I can! It’d probably look a lot like this, to be honest. Maybe Walt and Skeezix missed the audience suggestions because they came in late.

Mark Trail, 11/23/15

Welp, seems like our no-neck Homeland Security goons had been following Ken and Mark all along by using drones to track Ken’s sweet skullmobile! They just figured they’d let our heroes take out the baddies on their own, without government agents getting involved unless absolutely necessary. They provide a better value to the taxpayer that way, you know?

Spider-Man, 11/23/15

Whoa there, random U.N. General Assembly delegate! You may come from a country with cool hats, but this is America and we don’t use imperious language like “Guards! Seize him!” Try some American law enforcement lingo instead. “Security, we need you to apprehend an Atlantean individual, behind the podium at this time. Suspect is weilding a trident-style weapon and is wearing a vest, repeat, vest.”

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Judge Parker, 11/6/15

Good news, Neddy! Remember that beauty queen Hank was dating, an arbitrarily established narrative roadblock for you having your way with him? We’ll, she’s gone now, without any of us ever having seen her, through some backstory we haven’t discussed, because why bother? There’s nothing to come between you and his hard-hatted, mulletted charms anymore! All the Spencer girls will be getting everything they want, in the sex department, along with all other departments!

B.C., 11/6/15

Wow, look at Curls’s facial expression in panel two. That’s not the face of a man engaging in a long-running, well-established B.C. gag where Clumsy sticks his head in the water to watch fish swim by. That’s the face of man who’s found his dead friend face down in a frozen river. It’s not like the water flash-froze, either; he drowned long before that.

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B.C., 9/12/15

Yes, this is what radio listeners crave: the possibility of hearing a snail DJ slowly dissolving, over the radio! (psst I think maybe someone doesn’t actually know what “shock jock” means)

Family Circus, 9/12/15

Speaking of horrible salt-deaths, I love Big Daddy Keane’s little smile here. At last, he thinks, at last I have evidence that Billy’s heart is incurably hardened against the Lord. I can just leave him by the side of the highway with no regrets.

Pluggers, 9/12/15

Pluggers don’t even remember what it was like to feel giddy, overblown enthusiasm about anything in this life, and will thank you to leave them alone while they eat their ice cream in sullen silence.