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Dennis the Menace, 3/24/23

Ha ha, that is not the face of a lady who is amused or a little perturbed at the memory of of what went down during her last visit with the Mitchells; that is the face of a lady who, just as Dennis hopes, doesn’t remember that visit at all, and finds that terrifying. Was she here before? Why doesn’t she remember? Is she losing it, finally losing it once and for all?

Rex Morgan, M.D., 3/24/23

“By the way, don’t mention that to him. I’m not saying that I’m using my power of attorney to blow through all his money, but I am saying that you definitely should not mention anything I just said about his money subsidizing this cruise to him. OK? Nothing to worry about. But don’t say a fucking word to him on this subject.”

Beetle Bailey, 3/24/23

“Like, he knows about my crippling alcoholism, ha ha! Huh. that probably is too well, actually.”

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Beetle Bailey, 3/22/23

Miss Buxley’s baggy, shabby outfit today is going to disappoint both General Halftrack and the legions of Beetle Bailey fans who find “Miss Buxley Wednesday” to be a reliable means of getting off. Anyway, I definitely would like to see General Halftrack fumble his way through this conversation, asking “But wait, what happened to all your other clothes? Like the ones you were just wearing yesterday? The ones where you look like [swallows hard] you, uh, usually do?”

Mary Worth, 3/23/22

Oh, gosh, I guess Estelle was right to worry. Drinking beer straight from the bottle? We need the Santa Royale legal equivalent of a 5150 (a firm talking-to from Mary Worth), stat!

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Blondie, 3/14/23

Normally, the purpose of Blondie is to deliver laughs to comics lovers everywhere assure its readers, who are on average shockingly old, that their instinctual distrust and loathing of any novel cultural or technical developments from the past three decades are well founded. Unfortunately, today’s strip misses the mark, as pickleball is a trend that is almost entirely driven by Blondie’s core demographic of semi-active seniors. Ironically, this makes the exchange here, in which a couple of fortysomething guys express bewilderment about it, sort of loop around back to making sense again.

Beetle Bailey, 3/14/23

Big news, everyone! The good folks at Walker-Browne Amalgamated Humor Industries LLC have become aware of the existence of app-based food delivery services! Based on today’s strip, they definitely think that they’re just restaurants that you can use your phone to order food from, but it’s a start.

Hagar the Horrible, 3/14/23

Ha ha, it’s funny because the physical injuries Lucky Eddie has suffered in combat pale in comparison to his mental and spiritual trauma, yet his supposed best friend Hagar is positively gleeful at the thought of sending him back into battle!