Archive: Dennis the Menace

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Dennis the Menace, 9/28/23

Look, Mr. Wilson, I know your irritating neighbor has pushed you to the brink of madness, but when a couple renews their vows, that doesn’t represent a “reset” where they can decide they actually want to be child-free and any progeny they’ve already sired simply wink out of existence. That’s not how vow renewals work, or how children work, or how the progression of linear time works.

Dustin, 9/28/23

This kid voluntarily hangs out with Dustin all the time, which is a big clue the he’s not in a great place, but after today’s strip I really think someone should be looking into his home life, because it seems like it might be pretty grim.

Mary Worth, 9/28/23

“Sometimes,” he continued, “it’s not about what you like, it’s about what you need — what you need in terms of protein to maintain your massive, rippling physique, and how efficiently you can ingest it.” Then, without further ado, he shoved his face into the pan and started slurping.

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Slylock Fox, 9/18/23

I love how the narrator (reflecting official Forest Kingdom Regime propaganda) just has Slylock “overhearing” this conversation, like it’s a conincidence or something, as if he hasn’t very obviously broken into the Count’s castle without a warrant to snoop on his private interplanetary conversations. You could’ve been the first sapient Earth creature to make contact with extraterrestrial life, Sly, but now you’ve spoiled it and probably started our planet’s first space war in the process, so congrats.

Curtis, 9/18/23

Curtis, I honestly think you should be less shocked by “My teacher got a new haircut over the summer” and more shocked by “I have had the same teacher every year for as long as I can remember, and every year I neither advance to the next grade nor get any older.” Anyway, remember a few years back, when you still stayed the same age but got a new hat? This is like that, pretty much.

Dennis the Menace, 9/18/23

OK, Dennis telling grinning and updating some unknown third party about his mom’s sleepiness status … I don’t know what’s going on here but the vibe is very menacing.

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Hi and Lois, 9/11/23

Sometimes it can be easy to forget that we live in an age of technological wonders. For instance, if you have a leak in your house, you can contact a plumbing professional, send them a photo or video of the problem, and have them give a preliminary diagnosis and estimate, all without the need for them to make the trip out to your house. Hi and Lois absolutely hate this, for some reason.

Dennis the Menace, 9/11/23

Not sure if this guy is supposed to be the Mitchells’ minister (in which case their denomination’s clergy has undergone a significant sartorial downgrade in the last few years) or just some hapless victim Dennis has decided to annoy while Henry and Alice stand idly by doing nothing to stop him, but that is the face of a man who is either unable to politely get away from a little moron who’s so theologically misguided that he reinvented Scientology, or the face of a guy who isn’t listening to anything that little moron is saying because he has to take a huge dump. I guess it could be both.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 9/11/23

Look, Rene, the days which you’d get paid for your musical talents and flim-flam schemes in cash or cocaine are over, you current operate as part of an interconnected network of specialized professionals, so get used to it and stop kidnapping people.