Archive: Hi and Lois

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Hi and Lois, 4/14/12

The people in this scene don’t go from smiley to frowney because of Thirsty’s little jab — obviously they’re all well acquainted with the sad, hateful Thurston marriage’s dynamics. No, the sudden shift in mood comes because between panels they’ve all fallen through some kind of wormhole portal into a literal mirror universe, where everything is swapped right-to-left. Good luck processing right-handed amino acids in this terrifying hostile dimension, guys!

Mark Trail, 4/14/12

“Do you think he’ll like my green lipstick? I know he’s a square who hates marijuana, hopefully it won’t freak him out too much.”

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Shoe, 4/11/12

I’m not really sure if the pharmacist in panel is telling Roz that her pills have gotten more expensive or that her dosage has been tripled, but, really, who cares? Roz sure doesn’t! She’s high as a kite! Abusing prescription drugs is awesome, that’s the important lesson here.

Hi and Lois, 4/11/12

I guess Trixie in panel two is supposed to have an “I’m sad because I’m sick” face, but honestly to me it really just looks like it’s an “I’m sad because of what’s in my thought balloon” face. “I can’t even walk yet! I’m such a failure! I can’t coast by on a being a cute baby with stupid hair forever, I need to achieve independent mobility!”

Judge Parker, 4/11/12

“And why should he? I mean, there’s no possible conflict of interest in an elected official taking an extravagant gift from a foreign national who’s heavily involved in several murder attempts in his jurisdiction, after all!”

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Mary Worth, 4/10/12

Considering that Nola has finally experienced the change of heart that Mary’s been hoping for through the entire course of this storyline, she sure looks pretty gobsmacked in panel two. Maybe that’s because Mary Worth-style repentance doesn’t involve anything drastic like actually inconveniencing yourself professionally or financially. “Dear, doesn’t that seem a bit … dramatic? Surely you could have just donated a small portion of the raise you received with your ill-gotten promotion to charity. That would have alleviated my conscience if I were in your shoes! But this … well, it’s going to be difficult for me to preach personal improvement if personal improvement involves substantive and unpleasant changes in one’s life. That’s not the sort of thing most people go for.”

Spider-Man, 4/10/12

Poor Spider-Man! Over the course of this storyline, he really hasn’t had much success in defeating toughs or finding MJ or convincing the Avengers to help him find MJ or defeating Thor or getting into Asgard under his own power or defeating Loki or getting back to Earth from Asgard under his own power. But can he berate an underpaid nurse’s aide and jump to the head of the triage line at the emergency room? Yes! He can berate the hell out of that guy and jump the hell to the head of that line! The Amazing Spider-Man!

Hi and Lois, 4/10/12

“So if you want to benefit from our nation’s grinding economic malaise, shut the fuck up, get in there, frown a lot, and let me lowball this guy, because he’s desperate to sell, and when I say ‘desperate,’ it’s not an exaggeration for effect, I’m talking actual, palpable desperation. Nobody said real estate was pretty, bud.”