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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 8/10/08

Tarnation, look at the logo on that bag o’ grain on the porch in the final panel! It looks like Target, having saturated the suburbs with its big box stores, has decided to expand into America’s rural hollers and rustic shack-based communities.

Family Circus, 8/10/08

Oh, man, Mom, you do not want to look too closely at the front seat of that little car.

Funky Winkerbean, 8/10/08

I think it’s intriguing that what Summer took away from her mother’s message was not “Don’t get knocked up when you’re sixteen” but rather “Your dad has a good track record when it comes to dealing with teen pregnancy, so make sure he doesn’t die of prostate cancer before you inevitably get knocked up when you’re sixteen.” Nevertheless, in the first panel of the bottom row she does look appropriately horrified at the thought of her mom going at it with some dude in the back of a van.

Mark Trail, 8/10/08

OKAY, MARK, I’LL BE SURE TO INSPECT MY CAT FOR FLEAS! NOW CAN YOU PLEASE STOP SHOUTING?

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Mark Trail, 7/21/08

“The scent of the meat” being referred to in panel three is, of course, a coded reference to Kelly Welly’s genitals.

Mary Worth, 7/21/08

What is it that “feels to familiar … and yet so fresh at the same time” to Jeff? Mary Worth’s genitals, obviously.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 7/21/08

“I’m pretty sure the bear represented your genitals! And how, as we enter puberty, I’m simultaneously fascinated by and terrified of ’em!”

Pluggers, 7/21/08

Ha ha, this one isn’t about genitals at all! It’s just an explanation of how this plugger, when slightly less little, came to start getting high from huffing common household solvents.

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Mark Trail, 7/19/08

Smart thinking, Kelly! After all, if you’re a foolish young woman prowling around at night with a forty-year-old camera and an off-tan slab of bacon, the last thing you want is to be surprised wearing only your sexy body-shaping slip. No, it’s best to put on your mom jeans and tuck in your shirt. But be careful! Make sure you don’t wake up your fellow campers with the sounds of rustling polyester as you tie your cravat and adjust it to that kicky angle that all the boys like.

Beetle Bailey, 7/19/08

At last, the idea that Beetle Bailey is completely out of touch with today’s military has been disproved! Obviously General Halftrack refuses to be shown up by those jerks over at the Air Force and has managed to divert Camp Swampy’s allotment of anti-terrorist money to the construction of his own comfort capsule.

Hi and Lois, 7/19/08

Today’s unsettling thing that sounds like the title of ’70s exploitation movie about prostitution and should not be coming out of the mouths of little girls in the comics: “Torn between profit and pleasure.”