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Rex Morgan, M.D., 5/26/21

So Sarah’s been writing this very long fan letter to Kitty Cop scribe and noted local writer’s block sufferer Kyle Vidpa for a while now, and Rex has done nothing but make fun of her for it. I had naturally assumed this was primarily because Rex likes making people in general and his children in particular feel bad for experiencing enthusiasm, but let’s not forget that Rex may be projecting a bit because he also sincerely dislikes being on the receiving end of enthusiasm, even from people who owe their lives to his doctoring skills. As far as Rex is concerned, the only way to demonstrate your positive feelings for someone is to send them a tiny envelope that is exactly large enough to include a check and nothing else. Please do not write “thanks!” on the memo line.

Mary Worth, 5/26/21

A key thing to remember about this storyline is that that Ashlee chose Drew as her photographer because of his Instagram account, which in turn earned a decent following not because he actually takes portraits of people, but because he takes nature pics. But gosh darn if the good Dr. Corey the Younger isn’t going to throw his all into this assignment, by dressing Ashlee in an extremely cringeworthy fringed two-piece and yelling things at her that he’s probably half-remembering from the sequences in Austin Powers where Austin is going undercover as a fashion photographer.

Pardon My Planet, 5/26/21

“Aw man, I guess if this joke is going to be contemporary, it should reference Netflix, not normal television. Netflix has season lineups, right?”

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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 5/21/21

Ha ha! It’s funny because Orville in his grief has been forced to part with his ancestral home, his one asset that can raise cash in his crushingly poor community thanks to the interest of a relatively wealthy outsider, but now he’s about to be fleeced of all his money from that outsider’s friend!

Hagar the Horrible, 5/21/21

I’d like to imagine that this strip as originally submitted featured Lucky Eddie sitting astride his centaur steed, but the syndicate editors deemed that “too horny” and demanded that it be redrawn. The revised version, with Eddie riding demurely sidesaddle, is just horny enough.

Mary Worth, 5/21/21

Jeff, you want to live, don’t you? You want to keep on living on this Earth? Then I’m going to need you to choose your next words very carefully.

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Mary Worth, 5/19/21

“I certainly would not have formed a romantic liaison with this family had I known about the lapses in judgement lurking in your bloodline!” [throws on life jacket, pinches nose, pitches backwards out of the boat and into the sea]

Gil Thorp, 5/19/21

You ever think that the staff of the Milford Star, a non-student newspaper produced and read by adults, are a little too up-to-date on what the local teenagers are up to?

Pluggers, 5/19/21

Sure, it would make a plugger’s life easier in some ways if he allowed himself to form professional or personal relationships with people with non-Anglo-Saxon surnames. But a man has to have a code, you know?

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 5/19/21

DAMN IT THIS JOKE DOESN’T WORK IF WE CAN’T SEE INSIDE THE CAVE

IT COULD BE REAL NICE IN THERE