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Archive: Rex Morgan, M.D.

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Boring Thursday

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Hi and Lois, 10/5/17

I guess the joke here is about how Ditto cleaned his hands by … ruining one of the good towels, with his hand-filth? Anyway, I’m more intrigued by the giant steaming bowl of light-brown whatever on the counter behind Lois. Be sure to get all the dark brown off your hands, Ditto! Your whole family is going to be elbow deep in the light-brown goo soon enough! You don’t want to contaminate the goo, do you?

Spider-Man, 10/5/17

Ah, yes, our heroes have executed their strategy perfectly: isolate the villain from the substance he needs to stay alive, then claim that, despite the villain’s control of an army of thousands, only Spider-Man, with the proportional strength of an creature that we can all agree is primarily known for its digging prowess, can dig to said substance in time, then save the villain’s life and rejuvenate him so that he returns to the height of his powers. There are literally no holes in this plan!

Rex Morgan, M.D., 10/5/17

Hmm, looks like Rex Morgan is pivoting away from dogs too nightmarish to look upon and senile billionaires and the people who get to live their houses rent-free to … counterfeit comic book art being auction off on eB[I PASS OUT FACE-DOWN ONTO MY KEYBOARD OUT OF BOREDOM BEFORE I CAN EVEN FINISH THIS SENTENCE]

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Thursday quickies

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Family Circus, 9/28/17

I have no clear idea of what emotion Kittycat’s expression is supposed to denote, but it seems extremely sinister to me. “Ha ha, yes, I will keep purring, fool! For you shall seek but never find! There is no ‘it’ to discover! You’ll be pleasurably rubbing my fur with that stethoscope … forever! MU HA HA HA!”

Rex Morgan, M.D., 9/28/17

Clearly the powers-that-be at Rex Morgan have introduced this hideous, just-out-of-frame “dog” to distract us from the true horror — that Fox News personality Sean Hannity has donned a blond wig and is moonlighting as “Sarah’s friend from school.”

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 9/28/17

Ahhhh, life in Hootin’ Holler: the cargo cult keeps updating, but these folks are still as far from being able to participate in advances of modern civilization as ever!

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Depressing Tuesday

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 9/26/17

Oh, I forgot to mention the other day that we got a look at what our other beloved Rex Morgan, M.D. characters are up to, and what Heather is up to is being pregnant in England with the child of her now-fully-demented husband who no longer recognizes her, with the method she used to to achieve this state left tastefully unmentioned but presumably being along the lines discussed here. This means that family manservant Jordan’s job went from the extremely tricky (trying to help care for an increasingly infirm old man and offer emotional support to his bereft younger wife) to the comically easy (living in the Averys’ vast American mansion and, like, making sure it doesn’t burn down or anything). Apparently the price he has to pay is that whenever he brings a lady over, he has to kill any sexual tension by reminding her of her own mortality. He doesn’t make the rules!

Beetle Bailey, 9/26/17

Speaking of dementia, in Germany one nursing home figured out how to keep Alzheimer’s patients from escaping: setting up a fake bus stop just outside. The patients might be seized with the idea that it was very important that they go home, and rather than forcibly stopping them from leaving, staff would just allow them to go sit on a bench waiting for bus that will never come; eventually they forget why they’re there and can be convinced to come back inside more easily. I’ve always been fascinated by this technique, and it really came to mind today when I read Beetle Bailey, in which a soldier at a military base that has never quite seemed to have any of the details correct stands smiling at an obviously toy BUS STOP sign with two pork chops in his pockets.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 9/26/17

Ha ha, it’s funny because the pets in Hootin’ Holler are covered in vermin, just like the people!