Archive: Wizard of Id

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Dick Tracy, 10/17/25

So Dick Tracy wrapped up the case of the lady scientist with the glowing green zap gun by merely arresting her, not shooting her in the back while she was “resisting arrest.” And this turned out to be a terrible idea, because mysterious, powerful forces, possibly related to Diet Smith’s company’s desire to own the intellectual property behind said zap gun, have gotten the charges against her dropped! Mostly I’m showing you today’s strip because I think the thumb placement in panel three is very funny. How much hush money exactly is Edgar being illegally given via an easily traceable paper check? Three million and how many dollars? I guess that’s a mystery we’re not meant to know the answer to.

Wizard of Id, 10/17/25

A thing that always bugged me as a young comics-obsessed child was that the Perfesser, not Shoe, clearly seemed like the main character in Shoe, just based on how often the two of them were in the strip, and that Les Moore, not Funky Winkerbean, was clearly the main character in Funky Winkerbean, and that the King, not the Wizard, was clearly the main character in Wizard of Id. Now that I’m older and wiser, I realize how the interest of comics creators in their own various characters can wax and wane over the years, but unless you’re Snuffy Smith, it’s unlikely you’ll completely overturn the order of your reality and get your name added to the strip’s title. Still, since I’ve started reading the Wizard of Id more often lately, I feel like the Wiz is in it much more than he once was, and today it appears that he’s trying to violently ensure that his return to glory is permanent.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 10/17/25

“A teacher and an author? How many non-lucrative jobs can one guy have? Is he in an improv group too?”

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Wizard of Id, 10/3/25

It absolutely makes sense that people hear “New York” and think of New York City — the city is a world cultural capital, is the economic engine of the state and indeed much of the country, and a majority of the state population lives either in the city itself or its immediately adjacent suburbs. Still, when you grow up (like I did) in a very different kind of city that happens to be at the complete opposite end of the state, you get a little whiplash when you hear about things happening in “New York.” For instance, when New York legalized marijuana for recreational use, I was already living in Los Angeles, another megacity that was ahead of the curve on that one, so the idea of people in Brooklyn or Manhattan being able to buy weed at some high-end hipster dispensary absolutely made sense. But legalization was a state decision, not a city one, and going home to the Buffalo area and seeing janky stores in suburban strip malls near where my parents live named things like “The Devil’s Lettuce” was significantly weirder. Anyway, that’s kind of how I feel about newspaper comics doing weed legalization jokes. This topic belongs in alternative comics on the seedy internet! Not in the newspaper in front of God and everybody!

Rex Morgan, M.D., 10/3/25

I was trying to imagine what hedonistic and shocking activity the assembled Ameripolitans would be engaged in when Rex and June turn around and sneak back to the wedding as it gets later and wilder to see if they can make off with enough wedding cake to satiate their greedy children. Honestly doesn’t seem like an orgy crowd, but maybe … cocaine? Hard rocking country musicians, many of whom are older guys who probably came of age in the ’80s … they’ve moved on from booze to coke at this point, right? Never mind what I said up above about the Wizard of Id, I’m a blogger on the seedy internet and I’m allowed to make these jokes.

Mary Worth, 10/3/25

Damn, Mary, can’t you just be pleased and satisfied that these dogs Incredible Journeyed it here to see you? Do you need their drippy human owners to show up too? Why is nothing anyone does ever good enough for you?

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Herb and Jamaal, 8/5/25

“I guess this would be considered illegal…”

Hmm, what’s he reading about? Sounds juicy

“…if they didn’t call it a law.”

Ah, I get it, we’re doing a “none dare call it treason” bit. Bold!

“Every law is made for a reason…”

Yes, Herb, yes, it’s time to speak truth to power

“…even when it penalizes those to whom the law would never apply.”

I … uh … um … ????????

Wizard of Id, 8/5/25

Hey guys! Remember back in March, when Wizard of Id compared blocking somebody’s number to shooting a bird, with a gun, from the tower of a castle? Well, here’s today’s Wizard of Id, which compares blocking a spam e-mail to shooting a bird, with a magical power bolt, from the tower of a castle. Honestly excited to see what other important form of communication is going to get this treatment five months from now.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 8/5/25

Have you ever walked away from a concert disappointed by the energy level of the band, feeling like the musicians were kind of phoning it in and weren’t fully present for the performance? Well, have you considered that maybe they had spent their whole lives thinking one guy they had never met was their dad, but then they did a DNA test and found out a different guy they never met was their dad and that guy was dead, and now they’ve sent messages to their newly discovered half-siblings on Facebook but never heard back, and it’s eating them up inside? Bet you hadn’t thought of that, huh? Bet you’re just a rude and inconsiderate person. It’s all about what you want.