Comment of the Week

Is Dr. Jeff's 'again’ meant to indicate that he's already (willfully?) forgotten what Mary's told him, or does it display his belief that Wilbur's life is a karmic circle of disasters that are superficially varied but basically the same thing happening to him over and over?

Pozzo

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Slylock Fox, 3/24/14

Yes, yes, I’ve covered it all here exhaustively: at some point in the history of the Slylockverse, most species of animal abruptly achieved sapience and for the most part displaced Homo sapiens from its previous dominance of the ecosystem, with only a few genetically abnormal remnants like Wanda Witch surviving. Normally I’m obsessed with the question of when and how this Change occurred, but it’s worth contemplating some of the more subtle effects on the transformed animals themselves. For instance: just about every creature has a survival instinct, of course, and most animals will fight or flee when their dim minds understand that their health or life is in immediate danger. But only the most intelligent species have the time or capability to contemplate death in the abstract, to see grey hairs and smile lines in the mirror and realize with icy certainty that they herald the looming end. Would a bear in a forest in our world, or a beaver happily building a dam by instinct in some pristine lake, feel the slightest urge to trade some food or other precious item for a potion that would reverse the aging process? Of course not. And yet we humans understand all too well why these gullible beasts are willing to fork over hard-earned cash for the fraudulent promise of eternal youth. In the Garden of Eden parable, we imagine that humanity came into its own when it suddenly understood good and evil. But perhaps the truth is that awareness — and terror — of death is the true mark of a species that’s graduated to adulthood.

Wizard of Id, 3/24/14

I guess “Monkdonald’s” represents one of the Wizard of Id’s occasional acknowledgements that it notionally takes place in a vaguely medieval setting — because, they had, like, monks and stuff back then? Get it? Anyway, as a true indication of how half-assed everything about this is, the Monkdonald’s Happy Meal analogue is called a “Slappy Meal”, because it, like, rhymes and stuff? Get it? It so offends me that not the tiniest bit of effort has gone into making some joke mashing up McDonald’s product offerings and the golden age of European monasticism that I’m going to refuse to do it for them, even though making anachronistic jokes about monks is literally one of my favorite things in the world.

Heathcliff, 3/24/14

Is Heathcliff perhaps not quite the unstoppable badass that we’ve imagined? First we find out that he kisses his parole officer’s ass, and now we see that his suburb has been invaded and annexed by skunks and all he can do is watch in mute horror.

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Thank you all for being so kind to Uncle Lumpy — and for being so kind to me in the hugely successful spring fundraiser! I’ll be contacting everyone individually over the next week to thank you and find out where I should be sending your rewards. But a big thank you to all now. Some Monday comics will appear later this afternoon, but until then, what better thanks could you get than a tasty comment of the week?

This Pluggers is either extremely meta or utterly oblivious, and the fact that I can’t decide which spooks me the hell out.” –Fillmore East

And the hilarious runners up!

“Of course a Winkerbean is smoking outside. That’s what happens when you expose them to the light of day.” –Droopy Says

Apartment 3-G: “We need to talk. You’ve actually worked here a total of three days in the past two years, and now you show up stinking of deer shit and grief. It’s got to stop!” –bourbon babe, unbuckled

“I’m sorry, Tommie, but you’re only human. Unlike me, the incredible GOATWOMAN!” –pugfuggly

Spiderman: ‘I’m here to save you!’ Worker: ‘Dude, we’re just filming a commercial for crazy glue!'” –hogenmogen

“Luann’s measure of a close relationship is how well she can exploit it.” –TheDiva

“Next season on Marvinpiece Theatre: ‘Gruppenfuhrer Marvin and His Wacky Stormpoopers.’” –Pozzo

“I think this is the foundation for the old expression, ‘He screwed the pooch.’” –Dennis Jimenez

“Next on Marvin: 12 Years a Toddler” –Nuklhd

“If you buy the Judge Parker Blooper Reel you can see how many times the actors cracked up after the line, ‘Sorry, Flaco, I jerked on the stick.’” –Artist formerly known as Ben

Retro things are cool; retro people are pluggers.” –Baka Gaijin

Thanks to everyone who put some scratch in my tip jar! And, just as an advertising program note, I’ve started using BuySellAds as a platform for you to buy ads directly on my site on a CPM basis. To find out more, you can go to my BuySellAds page or just click here.

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Apartment 3-G, 3/23/14 (panels)

“Listen, you idiot! I have found a need to fill: as a nurse, at this hospital! In fact, I think I’ll take your job, since it’s so obviously vacant! Sheesh, who do you think I am — Lu Ann?”

Dick Tracy, 3/23/14

When Chester Gould launched Dick Tracy in the 1930’s, newspaper comic strips were a big deal. Like reality TV today, comics had prima-donnas, feuds, alliances, bitter contract disputes, knockoffs, parodies, the whole megillah. One of the best parodies was Al Capp’s Fearless Fosdick comic inside his own L’il Abner. Fosdick “ran” from 1942 through 1977 and spun off comic books, TV shows, endorsements (Wildroot Cream-Oil), jazz compositions, and toys. And here it is again, reparodied in its own source as “J. Straightedge Trustworthy” by in-strip cartoonist Vera Alldid. Wheels within wheels.

Anyway, I hope that Dick Tracy tries to recreate the entire 1930’s comic-strip ecosystem, especially if it makes good on the hint in panel 2 there.

Hi and Lois, 3/23/14

Hi and Lois entertains the Boomer fantasy that their nostalgia represents the apex of culture, but has the wisdom not to push it.

Mary Worth, 3/23/14 (panel)

“Gee whiz, weed and booze are already taken …. I guess it’s meth for me, then!”


Time for me to toddle off into that good night: Josh will be back Monday with your Comments of the Week and brand-new comics snark. Thank you for the wonderful response to the fundraiser, and for a fun week!

— Uncle Lumpy