Post Content

Lockhorns, 9/21/12

Loretta staring forlornly at Leroy’s paycheck as she cracks wise about his financial inadequacies is part of her shtick now, of course, just as most of the Lockhorns’ interactions with each other can be reduced to a formula aimed at emotionally destruction, repeated in endless permutations as the situation demands. Still, you’d think she’d at least make the pretense that she’s actually surprised by how little money he makes and open the envelope before making fun of it. Maybe Leroy should switch to direct deposit and deny her the use of her prop.

Family Circus, 9/21/12

We can all tell by looking at them that the Keane Kids are monstrous genetic anomalies, but now it seems that Jeffy’s deformed body is falling apart internally. Poor little mutant! You were never meant to be!

Post Content

Apartment 3-G, 9/20/12

Oh, man, Aunt Cathy is quickly vying for the title of Josh’s favorite Apartment 3-G character, non-Margo division. In fact, she’s almost as good at efficiently belittling Evan as Margo is. New theory: “Aunt Cathy” is actually Margo, who, decades in the future, remembered all the good times she had in the early ’10s humiliating her young employee for sport, and then travelled back in time so she could relive the magic.

B.C., 9/20/12

Wow, those mammoth sure are blase about the brutal dismemberment of their friends and relatives. I think that if I stumbled upon an awning made out of human skin, I wouldn’t be hanging around debating the aesthetics.

Crankshaft, 9/20/12

Haha, it’s funny because Crankshaft’s family decided to sell something that was important to him without asking his permission!

Post Content

Apartment 3-G, 9/19/12

Oh boy, Aunt Cathy’s back! You remember Aunt Cathy: she’s the aunt whose love Evan treasures so much, and who in return sometimes remembers that Evan exists. Anyway, she’s perfect for helping Evan with his new job, which involves recruiting and training suicide bombers.

Beetle Bailey, 9/19/12

Haha, remember in the ’90s, when General Halftrack was forced to endure sexual harassment training, because apparently you’re not allowed to tell ladies anymore that you have sexual access to them just because they work for you? Well, maybe some of the other members of his staff should have been included.

Archie, 9/19/12

“And I mean, I really want you to take it out. Bring this overflowing bag of putrefying filth to a nice restaurant, hold hands with it at the movies, go park somewhere secluded with it, maybe try to get second base. And take pictures! I want to see pictures!”

Family Circus, 9/19/12

“Mommy, PJ needs a hug but I have more love in my heart for these unfeeling plastic objects than I ever will for any human being!”