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Crock, 10/27/23

If, like me, you have constructed a professional life that requires you to read the syndicated newspaper comic strip Crock every day, you need to learn how to “make your own fun.” For instance, despite my usual attempts on this blog to humorously link Crock with the actual history of French colonialism in North Africa, I generally “hear” the dialogue in my mind in standard English. But what if these guys have been speaking in comical French accents this whole time? What if Crock pronounces the improbable name of the new man in the “computer section” as “vee roos”? That would definitely be funny, right? Or at least funnier than whatever else is going on here? Please, I need this.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 10/27/23

“Say,” the average Rex Morgan, M.D., reader is thinking to themselves, “now that this whole Rene storyline appears to be wrapping up, I’m left with a question: should I care about it, or about Rene as a person and motivator for events?” Here’s one Rex Morgan, M.D., character to give you the answer: no.

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Gasoline Alley, 10/26/23

I don’t usually get a chance to deploy my classics degree, but when I do, it’s usually to make a joke about the etymology of some word in the daily comics on this blog, which if you think about it is probably a better use of it than trying to trick undergraduates into enjoying Vergil or whatever. Anyway, meretrix is Latin for “prostitute,” and “meretricious” means, basically, “whorish,” or, metaphorically, something that looks attractive but has no value, which is not something people really say anymore, what with changing attitudes around sex work and sex work’s usefulness as a metaphor. It definitely does not mean and has never meant “loud,” so I’m not sure if this is supposed to be a joke about how this bear, despite his surprising ability to mimic human speech, does not have as full a command of English vocabulary as he believes, or if the Gasoline Alley brain trust simply decided to do a joke that was specifically about the meaning of the word “meretricious” but just assumed they knew the meaning of the word “meretricious” and didn’t bother to double-check.

Dick Tracy, 10/26/23

Speaking of vocabulary, I like the fact that Dick is meticulously writing down everything in this conversation that he doesn’t entirely follow (“Whitman little big books,” “guttersnipe level”) and will be looking them up later to find out if he was being insulted.

Mary Worth, 10/26/23

You know, if your long ago ex finally found out about the child of his that you had 20 years ago and never told him about because said child tracked him down and showed up on his doorstep, and then he tracked you down and made you go dinner with him, I’d think you’d be less … bored? I mean, this is an experience I’ll thankfully never have, so I guess I can’t tell Kitty how to live her life or conduct herself, but the vibe I’ve been getting from this dinner is that she doesn’t find this whole scenario particularly interesting. Anyway, probably she spent less time telling her daughter that Keith was a cop/Marine and dwelt more on the fun parts (that he was a rippling hunk of a man who she largely finds dull but who’s pretty good at sex).

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Six Chix, 10/25/23

After yesterday’s debacle, I’m pleased to see today’s Six Chix, in which a corporate dog discusses his frustrations with measured dignity. There’s a fire hydrant in the foreground, and since this is a comic about dogs, I think we’re supposed to assume one of them will piss on it eventually. But they’re not rubbing our faces in it and I’m sure we can agree that when they do get around to it, they’ll do it in a normal and relatively wholesome fashion.

Dennis the Menace, 10/25/23

Hey, Dennis, since we’re talking body parts, where’s your neck? Pretty sure we should be able to see at least some of it from this angle, but instead it kind of looks like your head’s just floating an inch or so above your shoulders. Just to keep with the counting theme, you have zero necks, which is fewer necks than you should have!