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Gil Thorp, 5/27/09

One of the (many, I swear!) things I like about Gil Thorp is its tendency to keep once-starring players around as background characters for as long as their fictional high school careers last. So, during basketball and baseball season of 2008, Andrew “The A-Train” Gregory (whose name was meant to taunt one of the strip’s younger readers) was an obnoxious, egomaniacal superjerk who dominated the plotlines with his self-aggrandizing antics. Now, though, he looks positively cuddly when compared to prank-happy megadouche Shep Trumbo. Presumably all of the strip’s readers will forgive Andrew’s past irritations if he makes good on his promise to choke the life out of Shep with that disturbingly realistic toy snake.

Marvin, 5/27/09

What is Marvin’s greatest affront to human dignity? This is a complex question that can probably only be fully answered by a duly constituted war crimes tribunal, but here’s my take. One of the things that make babies so enchanting is their innocence, their complete unfamiliarity with the world; everything is fascinating and delightful to them, even something as mundane as a household toaster, because it’s so new. But Marvin completely lacks this quality; instead, he’s a paradoxically cynical baby, viewing the world with heavy-lidded ironic distance. He’s a monstrous adult-infant hybrid: the worst aspects of grown-ups (emotional numbness, sarcasm) and babies (squalling, pants-shitting). He should be left on a hillside to be eaten by coyotes.

Herb and Jamaal, 5/27/09

This cartoon does a pretty good job of illustrating how difficult it must be to manufacture clothing in Herb and Jamaal-world, where individuals that are notionally of the same species can exhibit radically different physical characteristics. For instance, a baseball cap that fits snugly on the tip of Jamaal’s oblong skull can only balance precariously atop Herb’s spherical cranium.

Mary Worth, 5/27/09

Say, do you know what sort of people would be easy to snare in some sort of con? People who place their absolute trust in someone based on one ten-minute meeting and a relationship with his family that ended decades ago, that’s who!

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Two items of potential interest to you in a special mid-week metapost! First comes this AMAZING thing from faithful reader Jon. Did you know that one of the writers of the comic strip Six Chix is Margaret Shulock, who also writes Apartment 3-G? Also, did you know that there was a Six Chix blog? Well, both of these things are true, and Shulock last week put up a blog entry detailing how an installment of Apartment 3-G gets written. It just might blow your mind. Also, she says she needs info on A3G history before the ’90s, so get crackin’, folks!

Also! In non-comics-related news, I’m writing another one of my tech pieces, this time about IT “pet projects.” If you work in tech, have you been forced to toil on dumb pet projects on your bosses’ whim? If you want to share your funny or sad stories, send me a note at bio at jfruh dot com. I will anonymize to keep you out of trouble!

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Dick Tracy, 5/26/09

Dick Tracy may be a thug whose joy in enforcing the rights of the powerful are matched only by his delight in the anguished screams of his dying enemies, but you have to admit that, as panel one indicates, he has a pretty philosophical attitude about death, presumably because he’s seen so damn much of it. “Yeah, go ahead, ludicrously dressed card-themed villain, put a bullet in my head. What other kind of fate could possibly be awaiting me? At least I’ll be released from this world of suffering, where you’re either enduring pain or dishing it out. I’m just going to stare grimly ahead at you, not even giving you the pleasure of seeing my eyes opened widely; I reserve that for truly remarkable events, like, say, if I’m miraculously saved by you getting shot in the spine and presumably paralyzed for life.”

Dennis the Menace, 5/26/09

Is it really “menacing” if Dennis is doing what many would like to do, yet dare not, due to social conventions — berating people shouting into their cellphones inappropriately in public, for instance? Perhaps not, in and of itself. But look at the flummoxed, vaguely guilty expression on this fellow’s face. He’s already eating dinner out by himself; now his one attempt at human interaction has been stymied, and everyone else in the restaurant is staring at him, increasing his self-consciousness. Presumably he’ll hang up the phone, quickly wolf down his food, and leave in embarrassment, going home to his lonely, empty apartment to cry. Perhaps this is an act of true menacing — or perhaps Dennis is menacing us by showing us the real human consequences of our hidden desires.

Shoe, 5/26/09

Ha ha, it’s funny because shitting something something the economy!