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Shoe, 4/10/23

I joke about goggle eyes of horror a lot on this site in regards to Shoe but here’s an instance when they’re absolutely justified. Why on earth would you start a conversation like this? Why are you going around springing little “I can’t operate on this man … he’s my son!” riddles on people without their consent? Roz is just trying to supply everyone with passable diner food and make just enough conversation so they don’t feel lonely, so why would you do this to her? It’s unconscionable!

Mary Worth, 4/10/23

I was going to go on a riff about how Estelle’s going to be “getting her hands dirty” all right, once she starts having to euthanize animals, but then I caught glimpse of her eyes in the second panel. That’s a lady who got to her volunteer gig this morning and immediately started enjoying the massive amounts of horse tranquilizer that Dr. Ed keeps on hand at the vet clinic (a vet clinic that does not now and has never in the past treated horses).

Beetle Bailey, 4/10/23

You ever think that Beetle Bailey just might kind of want to die? Would explain a lot!

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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 4/9/23

I actually find Sheriff Tait’s expression in the second panel of the middle row quite poignant. Why, he never meant any harm! He doesn’t even carry a gun! He never should’ve taken Snuffy’s shouts of “I’ll die before I spend anoth’r night in yore jail, Tait!” as mere bluff! What has he done?

Hi and Lois, 4/9/23

Trixie Flagston, the character, has existed for nearly 70 years, but is canonically an infant, so we’re meant to understand that she has experienced each of these milestones exactly once. What happens when she finally encounters the Tooth Fairy? Will the spell be broken? Will the Flagstons finally be freed from their time-prison and be allowed to age, or, blessedly, to die?

Shoe, 4/9/23

“The flags should be at half-mast — to mourn the baby I just killed when my ball landed in this nest! We’re birds, right? Eggs are babies, to us?”

Panels from Blondie, 4/9/23

The canonical gospels tell us various (and somewhat conflicting) stories about Jesus’s disciples learning about his resurrection. But we’ve never seen how his beloved dog reacted when he rose on the third day — until now.

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 4/8/23

Look, Yvonne, either this guy has gone on a journey of personal self discovery that has resulted in the enshittification of his musical career and him dressing like a Secret Service agent for some reason or he and “Dr. Mirakle” are running a badly marketed scam to captive cruisegoers, or maybe Mud Mountain thinks it’s the first one but Dr. Mirakle knows it’s the second one, but whichever one it is, it’s gonna be pretty funny, so please let’s move forward and forget about the “Muddy Boots” thing, OK? I’m sure it’s on Spotify. Maybe ask some probing questions. What’s up with the sunglasses, for instance? Is he blind now? Did Dr. Mirakle order him to blind himself, as part of his ritual of transformation? Or is he just really hungover?

Mary Worth, 4/8/23

“Wow, we just started dating, so suddenly working together every day could be a lot … and you have literally no experience in the veternary field … and you’re clearly very comfortable letting things linger on painfully instead of putting them out of their misery, as evidenced by how long it took you to fully break up with Wilbur … sounds like you’re the pefect candidate! You start Monday bright and early. Hope you own some clean scrubs because the ones down at the clinic have a lot of dog blood on them.”