Post Content

Dustin, 5/23/19

Wow, this is quite a turn in the depiction of the generational Boomer vs. Millennial battle in Dustin! Sure, the kids these days spend too much time on Twitter and are lazy to the point of narcolepsy, but check out this late-middle-aged criminal who’s shocked, shocked that he might suffer consequences for stealing! And check out Dustin’s dad, a high-priced defense attorney who cheerfully profits from white-collar crime whether he wins his case or not! If you need consolation, my silver-haired thief, maybe you should find it in the fact that you presumably came to court from your nice house, wearing a nice suit, rather than, just to take an example at random, spending three years on Riker’s Island awaiting trial for shoplifting a backpack. Presumably you’ll get to go back to your nice house and will have a leisurely month or two to talk to your broker and accountant about how to sell enough securities to pay that fine without unduly increasing your tax burden. The system works!

Funky Winkerbean, 5/23/19

It’s hard for me to admit that I have a “favorite” kind of Funky Winkerbean, but I do, and it’s this kind: the kind where the character delivering the punchline at least has enough self-awareness to look ashamed about it.

Post Content

The Lockhorns, 5/22/19

I gotta give The Lockhorns credit here: this panel contains a classic “male character is aroused by a sexy nurse character” scenario, but acknowledges that no actual medical professional has worn the stereotypical white “sexy nurse” uniform in decades. However, the direction they did end up going with it, where the nurse is wearing typically pastel scrubs but, like, form-fitting, short-skirted, sexy scrubs, is perhaps even more insane and unlikely, so I suppose I gotta give them credit for that too!

Rex Morgan, M.D., 5/22/19

Oh, huh, I guessed I called it correctly: it’s an armed robbery! I’m very intrigued to see exactly how Rex Morgan, M.D., will make an armed robbery boring.

Family Circus, 5/22/19

Dolly joined a cult because she thought it would finally make people pay attention to her! It isn’t working very well.

Post Content

Mary Worth, 5/21/19

As I predicted, Mary has dragged poor Terry Bryson, an actual cybersecurity expert, down to Estelle’s apartment to help her process her post-scam life, emotionally. Terry’s full of stats meant to buck Estelle up, like the fact that the average romance scam cost its victims $14,000, so Estelle, who only coughed up ten large, was actually like 30% less dumb than the averarge dumb person who gets scammed online. Still, I think it’s kind of insulting that Terry is just casually surfing the web as they talk, showing off the fact that she doesn’t need her full concentration to avoid falling in love with some creep who’s using a photo of a handsome male model on his dating profile.

Sam and Silo, 5/21/19

I’m not sure which syndicated newspaper comic I expected to advocate for tax resistance as a form of civil disobedience that could starve the American imperial war machine, but it definitely wasn’t Sam and Silo!