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Crock, 11/6/26

The thing about wars — even low-level wars of colonial occupation, like the interminable one the Foreign Legion is fighting in Algeria — is that they’re dangerous. Even if you’re not shooting at someone, or getting shot at, you’re living in a milieu where there’s a constant baseline of violent chaos. There are weapons around, along with just a general sense of disorder, with civilians finding that their needs and safety take a backseat to those of the occupying forces even in their own homes. It’s the sort of place where a baby could crawl into an artillery piece and get blown up, is what I’m saying, which is one of several good reasons not to fight wars.

Dick Tracy, 11/6/26

I have no idea if Dick Tracy strips in the year 2026 accurately depict old-timey police jargon, or even current police jargon, so I can’t tell if this lady referring to a home that police investigated without coming up with any leads as a “dry hole” is realistic, but I am comfortable saying that it’s gross. I don’t want to hear about dry holes! It’s a very upsetting phrase! Also, I have a problem with Dick’s “different hole” line in the last panel here; for one thing, it’s somehow even grosser, and for another thing we’re clearly looking at two holes and also there’s zero blood or even bloodstains on this white nurse’s uniform, so this is yet another unsettling dry hole situation, in fact.

Mary Worth, 11/6/26

“So, Nelly, dear, are you going to tell me why you spread that rumor? Remember, you’ve already eaten the muffins, and only I have the antidote.”

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Crankshaft, 11/4/26

I don’t talk about it very much, but ever since Funky Winkerbean triumphantly (?) concluded, Crankshaft has been afflicted by thinly veiled authorial insert character Batton Thomas, creator of the comic strips 3 O’Clock High (thinly veiled Funky Winkerbean) and The Wrinkles (thinly veiled Crankshaft). Except the characters in Crankshaft and Funky Winkerbean look more or less like people, while the characters in 3 O’Clock High and The Wrinkles are these grotesque, large-eared parodies of humanity, symbolizing the fact that they are a narrative layer further away from our real world. But now they’ve escaped containment! And they walk among their Funkyverse counterparts! What happens when Lovable 3 O’Clock High band director character [NAME NOT INTERESTING ENOUGH TO FIND] interacts with his obvious model, Harry Dinkle? Will it tear a hole in the fabric of reality and allow them to enter our universe, in a crossover event that will greatly amuse some unknowable-to-us observers in yet another, more “real” universe? I hope not! I don’t want to talk to any of these guys! What if they read all the mean stuff I’ve written about them on my blog?

Herb and Jamaal, 11/4/26

I was going to try to parse the “punchline” here and try to figure out if it represented a joke or even wordplay of any kind, but then I realized that the dialogue in the first panel is in a thought balloon, which I guess means that this isn’t Herb being sullen about one of his loudmouth customers, it’s him ruminating at random, possibly after experiencing a minor cerebrovascular event, so I don’t feel obligated.

Mary Worth, 11/4/26

I know “suspenseful” is not a term we usually use about Mary Worth plots, but I’m genuinely unsure if where she’s going with this is “Nelly is such an unhappy soul, nothing I could do or say would be worse punishment than just living with herself” or “Nelly could lash out and hurt anyone at any time, and that’s why we have to put her down like a rabid dog.”

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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 11/2/26

Look, I get that they might have been misled by the “racing days” reference, but it’s embarrassing that these two birds have mistaken their fellow avian for a horse. This is just proof that they’re very stupid and, despite their ability to talk in the context of these Barney Google and Snuffy Smith Present … Sparkplug’s Grandson Li’l Sparky strips, it’s actually fine that Snuffy is going to steal them from his neighbors so Loweezy can kill and cook them.

Dick Tracy, 11/2/26

I know I’ve recently celebrated Dick Tracy’s turn back to the macabre, but I have to say the strip may have gone too far today. Streaming media personalities? In the comics? No thanks. Oh also the family appears to have murdered their pinheaded nurse, to cover up their various crimes, I guess.

Mother Goose and Grimm, 11/2/26

I am ignoring whatever joke they’re attempting to implement here, but I do want to point out that it’s now strip canon that the title characters can just drop by the office of Satan, the great Adversary, which is clearly in the depths of Hell itself, whenever they feel like. Not sure if we’re meant to understand that they have the power to move back and forth across the veil that separates the worlds of the living and the dead, or if they in fact inhabit Hell full time themselves, and the various misadventures we see them get into represent some kind of ironic punishment tailored specifically for them, due to their sins.

Mary Worth, 11/2/26

It’s day 17 of the siege by various law enforcement agencies that began when Mary hung Nelly Fenele’s flayed skin on the gates of Charterstone as a warning to those who would dare betray her. The feds thought it would take only a few days for the hungry residents to turn on the woman the media is calling “The Butcher of Santa Royale,” but the produce from the Charterstone garden has so far been enough to keep everyone loyal. Thank goodness for mild California weather!