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Dennis the Menace, 2/3/26

OK, this is, no joke, some significant menacing here. First of all, this guy has never appeared in the strip before, so I assume Dennis is in the yard, unaccompanied by a parent or guardian, of an adult who is a total stranger to him. And check out that fence! That’s a serious fence this five-year-old kid scaled, presumably with pockets full of rocks, which he is now spookily skipping across a pool belonging to, as noted, someone he’s never met in his life. Kudos to you, Dennis, this time! You’re really freaking me out!

Rex Morgan, M.D., 2/3/26

Man, I love Rex’s grim expression here in panel two. It’s pretty clear that “Jimmy” is a mistake for Johnny and not Michael, but it’s very important that he know for certain whether this embarrassing failure of an appendix to maintain structural integrity happened inside the torso of his biological son or his adopted son, so he can start figuring out whose genes to blame.

Herb and Jamaal, 2/3/26

Normally, actually prestigious restaurant awards are driven by their own institutional investigation and decision making processes — you don’t send in an “application” that gets “declined” or anything, you just wake up one day and find out that they gave the award to your hated rival. Still, I’d like to believe that the Michelin Guide made an exception for Herb and Jamaal and sent them a personal note in the mail telling them to eat shit.

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Heathcliff, 2/1/26

Before the heavy crown of Heathcliff stewardship descended upon Peter Gallagher from his uncle, he contributed comics panels to Weird NJ magazine, which included a character named “The Jersey Tomato.” It’s difficult to find images of The Jersey Tomato online, but her whole deal appears to be that she’s a tomato who’s a sexy lady, or possibly a sexy lady whose head is a giant tomato. Anyway, since taking over Heathcliff, Gallagher has rewritten much of its DNA, and it’s impossible not to see a bit of the Jersey Tomato in this incredible new character, “The Hot Ham,” a ham who’s a hot, sexy lady, or possibly a hot, sexy lady who’s mostly a giant ham. I’m excited for this strip’s burgeoning audience of Zoomer fans to add “aromantic (except for hams)” to the long list of sexual-emotional orientations that I as a middle-aged person do not have to worry about.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 2/1/26

Oh, snap, it’s not Buck at all who’s picking up Rex from his surgery, it’s June’s crazy beloved Aunt (?) Tildy! A few years ago we were teased with a “Tildy is an old drunk” storyline that immediately turned out to be a “Tildy loves soda pop and takes ‘unplanned naps’” storyline, but let’s keep our hopes up that she has some kind of impairment that makes Rex’s drive home a truly terrifying one.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 2/1/26

Somewhat counterintuitively, this strip about caricatured hillbillies with occasional cameos from a big-city sharpie from the Woodrow Wilson administration was a pioneer in making jokes about cryptocurrency. So I’m excited for them to explore the crypto-adjacent world of prediction markets, where anyone can place prop bets on just about anything and insider trading is not just legal but encouraged because it makes their predictive powers more accurate (and enriches insiders in the process).

Crock, 2/1/26

I mean, obviously. What did he think the “car going in the tunnel” thing was about?

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Wizard of Id, 1/26/26

I guess a running bit in the Wizard of Id now is that the titular wizard is encountering aspects of contemporary life one by one and commenting on them as an outsider, and, look, I’ll allow it if all we get is some mildly corny jokes about emo, but I have to draw the line at “the Wizard sees women wearing much more revealing outfits than he’s used to in his culture and gets horny about it.”

Rex Morgan, M.D., 1/26/26

Oh, man, it’s gonna be Buck, right? June’s going to get Buck, the soap opera comics’ biggest drip, who doesn’t have much going on beyond scouring Etsy for dumb nostalgic bullshit, to “cover” for her in terms of providing Rex with emotional reassurance? This is gonna be great. Rex is going to open his newly healed eyes only to lunge for the nearest scalpel so he can gouge them out and never look Buck’s stupid face again.

Dick Tracy, 1/26/26

Being a one-off ancillary character in Dick Tracy seems like a mixed bag. On the one hand, they get to wear cool outfits and have sexy, drunken adventures! On the other, they tend to stumble upon horribly mangled corpses much more than you or I would.

Hi and Lois, 1/26/26

“Plus Marky Mark is out there drowning somewhere! It’s a win all around!”