The Comics Curmudgeon

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One small step for weirdos

(I was planning to comment on the FOOBs today, but the image from gocomics.com was so ludicrously large that I thought it might cause blindness and dementia to those who looked upon it, so I’ll just say in passing BLARRRGGGH.)

Slylock Fox, 8/19/07

Pity poor Count Weirdly! It’s like a guy can’t even have a press conference atop his most scenic turret to promote his faked moon landing (like the so-called “real” ones weren’t!) without some nosey fox sticking his snout where it doesn’t belong and criticizing his Photoshop skills. If telling bald-faced lies at press conferences is illegal, I know a lot of more important venues where Slylock should be putting his patented brand of pedantic deduction to work. As it is, the only organization apparently gullible enough to accept the invitation to the Weirdly Moonshot announcement appears to be Agence France-Presse, as indicated by the reporter’s micro-miniskirt and the cameradog’s beret (and good luck getting any usable footage out of this nighttime press conference with absolutely no artificial lighting, Fideaux). In fact, this pair is probably more likely to be filming for the series Les Hommes Les Plus Étranges Au Monde than they are to be taken in by the idea of air-tight Chuck Taylors.

Mary Worth, 8/19/07

Man, that Dr. Drew is one smooth operator, isn’t he? One date’s worth of his bland, slick-backed handsomeness and Mary-style aphorisms and Vera is literally throwing herself at him! And of course we can see why Drew would be so eager to draw Vera into his web of love. “Ha .. ha .. I’ve decided to go out in public in shoes that I have no idea how to walk in! I belong in a sideshow like the circus freak that I am! AARRGH, I just fell over! Did I mention all the sexual tension with my brother?”

Apartment 3-G, 8/19/07

So I have to admit that when I joked about Alan being an addict and Jones the beatnik being his dealer, I didn’t actually think it was true. I guess I have a lot to learn about the soap opera comics’ willingness to obliquely take on tough themes! Alan’s commitment to sobriety ought to be obvious from his deeply square sartorial choices, as his white dress shirt/black vest combo would get him laughed out of any drug den in the five boroughs. Still, the years of chemical abuse of his brain have taken their toll; he’s undoubtedly spending this entire strip trying to keep his shit together despite the fact that events keep repeating themselves, and his and Eric’s hair keep swapping colors.

Crock, 8/19/07

And speaking of drugs … the combination of misplaced geography (Inca pottery in North Africa?) and garden-variety stupidity is all too typical for this feature, but the final panel pushes today’s Crock into the realm of peyote-addled nightmare. A little boy named Otis in the middle of the sun-blighted wasteland, chatting with a vulture who’s sporting a baseball cap? And where are they going to get the toilets, huh? Where are they going to get the toilets? Ye gods.

Dennis the Menace, 8/19/07

There is no reason why Dennis shouldn’t have unloaded that ball directly into Henry’s nuts in the third-to-last panel. None. They even set it up with the whole “waist high” thing. Still, this’ll keep dad from attempting to spend any quality time with his kid for the rest of both of their lives, leaving Dennis with more time to get into extremely low-level unsupervised hijinks.

This entry was posted on Sunday, August 19, 2007 at 12:46 pm and is filed under Apartment 3-G, Crock, Dennis the Menace, Mary Worth, Slylock Fox.

96 responses to “One small step for weirdos”

Kate
August 19th, 2007 at 12:52 pm [Reply]

Wait, what? Vera went onto the beach in high heels? Am I interpreting this correctly? Has K. Moy ever *worn* shoes.
Kate
August 19th, 2007 at 12:53 pm [Reply]

Crap. Hit “post” before I proofread or even, you know, finished the sentence. What I meant to say was “Has K. Moy ever *worn* shoes? In the actual outside places that you’d wear shoes? Does she understand what sand is?”
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
August 19th, 2007 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

Has the hypothesis already been put forward that the entire run of the comic strip Crock is actually the disturbed hallucination of someone slowly dying alone of thirst in the brutal North African desert?
Jackie Oh!
August 19th, 2007 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

Did Glandthony propose to Liz today? Oy!
BigTed
August 19th, 2007 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

I think “Crock” is about to morph into “Otis and the Vulture,” a zany strip about a kid and his wacky talking pet that will bring in all the readers who miss “Calvin and Hobbes.”

Next week: They go dune-sledding on an unstable toboggan!
Holy Prepuce
August 19th, 2007 at 12:59 pm [Reply]

And why “commode?” Has anyone outside the plumbing supply trade used this term since 1950? Is “toilet” too obscene for the comics page? Toilet toilet toilet.
Sili
August 19th, 2007 at 1:04 pm [Reply]

So the latest arc of A3G is actually a drug-induced halloucination? (I mean, swapping hair colours and repeating your conversations can happen to anyone, but have you seen the ‘art’ on the wall?)

Didn’t we just do this once?

Perhaps every arc so far has been fueled by a different substance. Acid this week, gas the last. Anyone care to dig up the coke, meth and caffeine strips for me?
Inspector Dim
August 19th, 2007 at 1:06 pm [Reply]

I am very fond of the way that Vera and Drew can just touch their lips together, slightly apart, applying no pressure whatsoever, so that their lips are viewable in their entirety from the side. Beautiful. It actually gives the impression of nibbling.
BigTed
August 19th, 2007 at 1:07 pm [Reply]

And speaking of weirdness, could today’s “Blondie” have been any stranger? A random woman on the street bizarrely accuses Dag of staring, then actually calls over a cop and accuses him of stalking her! In reality, he was just waiting for Blondie — who, it turns out, is the wacky lady’s old college roommate! And the “gag” is that Misery McCrazypants is coming over for dinner.

The only way to save this disaster would have been a final frame that pictured Dagwood behind bars, wailing, “Don’t you hate it when you get unfairly jailed on a stalking complaint? They’ll do it every time!”
doug rogers
August 19th, 2007 at 1:10 pm [Reply]

Maybe it’s just me, but replace ’shoes’ with ‘panties’. It’s funny.
scan
August 19th, 2007 at 1:13 pm [Reply]

The only way to save this disaster would have been a final frame that pictured Dagwood behind bars, wailing, “Don’t you hate it when you get unfairly jailed on a stalking complaint? They’ll do it every time!”

ooooh yeah!
doug rogers
August 19th, 2007 at 1:13 pm [Reply]

:-) ‘heels’ and ’shoes’…
Jeff Fecke
August 19th, 2007 at 1:14 pm [Reply]

I went to read FOOB, and I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.
ElSanto
August 19th, 2007 at 1:15 pm [Reply]

I’m a bit disturbed by Mr. Wilson’s dreamy looks in the last panel of Dennis the Menace today. It sorta trascends bemusement and crosses over into … well, maybe lust is too strong of a word, but it’s getting there.

Also, this might be the first time I’ve seen Mr. Wilson encouraging Dennis in his menacing. I guess as long as it doesn’t interrupt his personal nap time, he’s all for that obnoxious action.
Poteet
August 19th, 2007 at 1:16 pm [Reply]

BLARRRGGGH is good. It sure works for me.
Inspector Dim
August 19th, 2007 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

I’m thinking that we can come up with an alternate, usually hallucinogen-fueled (but sometimes not) explanation for just about every strip that’s out there. Many of these have been brought up before:

FOOB: Michael’s coma dream, following the fire. He’s actually languishing in a hospital bed next to Mr. Kelpfroth. Family members aren’t sure which one the smell is coming from.

B.C.: Post-apocalyptic cavemen (this has actually been confirmed, pretty much)

Wizard of Id: Long running Renaissance Fair

Funky Winkerbean: The band director’s revenge fantasy

Garfield: The last firings of Garfield’s brain as he expires of hunger in an empty house

Crock: Man wandering desert eats the wild desert strawberries

Popeye: A sailor eats some bad spinach

And so on.
AlmostAGhost
August 19th, 2007 at 1:24 pm [Reply]

Speaking of misplaced toilets, why is there on in the background of panel 3 in Mary Worth?
Poteet
August 19th, 2007 at 1:25 pm [Reply]

MW — I’m still peeved that Vera has decided to claw her way to the top of the typing pool instead of at least having a calm discussion with her brother about the fact that DEAR OLD DAD WANTED HIS SON TO GIVE HIS DAUGHTER SOME OF THE MOOLAH. The worse Dear Brother could do is say “I’m keeping every penny,” in which case she’d be no worse off than she is now. Fortunately, Vera is making such dimwitted wardrobe and romantic decisions that my concern for her share of the estate is rapidly fading.
Poteet
August 19th, 2007 at 1:30 pm [Reply]

MW — Besides, Vera and Dawn look so much alike, except for their tragic hairstyles, that I’m thinking Filthy Rich Dad may have cuckolded Wilbur at some point and that Vera and Dawn are really sisters. That would open up the possibility of a tearful joyous revelation followed by a threesome with Drew, but this strip would manage to make that boring as hell even if all the participants were closeup-naked and going at it for a week.
NotThatGuy
August 19th, 2007 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

MW: So I’m looking forward to a whole week of Vera wearing the purple shirt with the boiled kittens, confiding in Mary about wanting to keep her love for Drew secret.

Dawn will look on, furious that not only has Vera stolen her man but her purple boiled kitten shirt as well.
Lame Name
August 19th, 2007 at 1:32 pm [Reply]

FOOB: So Liz and Anthony’s idea of foreplay is asking each other shallow, personal ad-type questions that they probably already know the answers to?

Let’s make this a more useful exercise. How about some questions that Anthony and Liz actually need the answers to?

Here’s my first suggestion:

Anthony: How do you feel about confined spaces?
Esophagus
August 19th, 2007 at 1:38 pm [Reply]

In other news, the Keane family nearly died today in a horrible car wreck. The world mourns their luck.
Jeremy
August 19th, 2007 at 1:41 pm [Reply]

Sign of the apocolypse:
The Keane’s almost die
The moustache scores
and Dennis makes sure he has no other future siblings.
Jeremy
August 19th, 2007 at 1:41 pm [Reply]

Signs of the apocolypse:
The Keane’s almost die
The moustache scores
and Dennis makes sure he has no other future siblings.
whatwhat
August 19th, 2007 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

Nothing says “sexy date time!” like a suit. A ladies’ suit. WITH SHORT SLEEVES.

Oh, and shoes dyed to match. amazing.
Poteet
August 19th, 2007 at 1:48 pm [Reply]

# 18 — That’s supposed to be “the worst,” not “the worse.” I do know better. Argh.
ChristianPinko
August 19th, 2007 at 1:51 pm [Reply]

SFx – Does anyone else find it charming that Count Wierdly is wearing his eye mask in his lunar expedition photos?
Dean Booth
August 19th, 2007 at 1:56 pm [Reply]

MW: Following in Aldo’s Shoes.
Victor Von
August 19th, 2007 at 2:06 pm [Reply]

Nice one, Dean! It’s a vast improvement on the lack of death in Mary Worth lately. Those two are clearly contemplating Sinful Acts, so obviously the vengeful God of Worth must act.

I’m not sure that’s a buzzard in Crock. Maybe it’s… some kind of aardvark? That sits in cacti, without apparent ill effect?

Why does it take two people to create that strip? One to not-write and one to not-draw?
Mibbitmaker
August 19th, 2007 at 2:12 pm [Reply]

Slylock: Looks like Karla Blackwell drew a portrait of Winnie Cooper in the kids’ drawings section.

MW1: Vera once tried to dig a hole in her lawn in her heels, which inevitably lead to her tossing one of them through her window. Luckily a maker of TV ads happened to see the whole thing.

MW2: The penultimate panel would’ve been vastly more effective if they blacked out the dialogue. Much more subtle. But it is MW, so they went with “soapy” instead, of course.

MW3: Like with the A3G sequence of a while ago showing Margo getting out of bed in her darkened room, the last panel here shows that you can make passable but mediocre “realistic” art much more awesome with line shading and shadowing.

MW4: Yeah, Vera, that’s right, you just wore heels as a mistake for walking on the beach… and just happened to fall into Dr. Drew… suuuuuuuuuuuure…… ;o)
10 AM and drunk as lord
August 19th, 2007 at 2:13 pm [Reply]

Is it just me, or could Liz and Anthony have just boiled down that entire checklist to “not Margo”, thus saving more time for awkward, unenthusiastic sex? Oh, who am I kidding? No matter how much time they have, the sex will take two minutes and end with Anthony apologizing.
Dean Booth
August 19th, 2007 at 2:19 pm [Reply]

SFx: Disbelievers cite the lack of or inconsistency in shadows to poo-poo the moon landing:

FOX narrator: “On the Moon, the astronaut’s only source of light was the Sun. … Here’s an astronaut who descends into the huge shadow cast from the lunar module, yet his entire body is still visible. How is it that he is not shrouded in darkness?”

People should listen to Slylock FOX news.
Max
August 19th, 2007 at 2:26 pm [Reply]

I find it interesting that you didn’t touch upon today’s Family Circus, in which The Mommy’s left shoulder, due to a car crash scare, is briefly relocated to her stomach.
TargemQ8
August 19th, 2007 at 2:31 pm [Reply]

Oh, i shouldn;t have gone and looked. I really shouldn’t have.
“Let’s read out EHarmony profiles aloud as some sort of very boring foreplay! Commitment makes me hot!”
Anonymous
August 19th, 2007 at 2:46 pm [Reply]

As if Crock wasn’t bad enough with everything Josh pointed out. Still, I feel the need to point out that there are NO CACTI IN NORTH AFRICA. And no way that’s a vulture.
SarahSunshine
August 19th, 2007 at 2:49 pm [Reply]

Crock’s Inca-relic-filled North African desert is apparently really the Sonoran Desert, since that’s the only place the saguaro cactus (the one with the “arms”) can be found. That means he’s either in Arizona or Northern Mexico.
AeroSquid
August 19th, 2007 at 2:59 pm [Reply]

Oh that cheeky Boo Boo !

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1254/1174343712_d4011e8b50_o.jpg
odinthor
August 19th, 2007 at 3:00 pm [Reply]

Oh, dang! While I was working on the following, SarahSunshine beat me to the punch. Well, (sigh) might as well post it anyway…

Crock — Just to add my mite to the “misplaced geography” file: Deep, deep in the cartoonist’s mind, he is drawing on his idea of a Saguaro cactus for the plant in which the vulture is sitting. Oh the ~~humanity~~ botany! Right now, right even as we ~~speak~~ input stuff, plants of north Africa are snickering and shouting, “Hey, Mr. Smart-Ass Artist! Ain’t no stinkin’ members of the Cactaceae native to this continent, and no use pretending there are! If you can’t draw a proper cartoony succulent Euphorbiaceae or Asclepiadaceae, go teach your nanna to suck eggs!”.
odinthor
August 19th, 2007 at 3:04 pm [Reply]

Anonymous beat me too. Bah! Back to scorching my lunch.
IdleDandy
August 19th, 2007 at 3:10 pm [Reply]

Baby Blues: Am I the only one who needed several seconds to figure out that Zoe was eating from a sleeve of crackers, and not a stick of butter?
Masem
August 19th, 2007 at 3:14 pm [Reply]

No comment on today’s PbS?
http://www.comics.com/comics/pearls/

I wonder if someone is reading this blog.
Joe Blevins
August 19th, 2007 at 3:14 pm [Reply]

MW: Alan is cearly taking his fashion cues from Han Solo. I also like the abrupt rude turn the conversation takes in the last panel.

DTM: Does it bother anyone that Mr. Wilson is staring at Dennis’ dad in the classic “lovestruck schoolgirl” posture? All the last panel needs are little floating hearts around his head.
off-model
August 19th, 2007 at 3:16 pm [Reply]

#31 10 A.M., the sex will take two minutes and end with Anthony apologizing.

And then Anthony will later tell Liz’s father all about it pretending to feel bad while implying that it was all Liz’s fault.
John will assure him that it happened because Anthony loved Liz too much and his daughter is a shameless hussy if she thinks otherwise.
Echo
August 19th, 2007 at 3:20 pm [Reply]

FOOB — “More boring than humanly possible?” “Check.”

Seriously, wtf? Nothing about that strip tells the reader anything about Liz or Anthony except that they’re both pathetic, dull and scarily desperate to suction onto each other so neither of them might have to consider growing a personality.

A3G — It’s not that Alan has a history of substance abuse. It’s that he’s not wearing a tie. This is an obvious clue that he doesn’t follow society’s rules, and therefore must be a druggie. Next thing you know, he’ll be on the street. It’s a slippery slope, after all.
Joe Blevins
August 19th, 2007 at 3:24 pm [Reply]

Er, I mean “Apartment 3-G.” But, still, my point is that Eric is being kind of a dick in the last panel.
Applemask
August 19th, 2007 at 3:26 pm [Reply]

I believe Mr. The Menace in that penultimate panel is releasing 56 years’ worth of rage and despair, screaming “THIS IS NO FUN” at a God now long dead.
AeroSquid
August 19th, 2007 at 3:27 pm [Reply]

3-G: Alan looks like he is going to audition for stage version of ‘Midnight Cowboy’.
Loppie Scaduto
August 19th, 2007 at 3:43 pm [Reply]

For some reason, the merest glance at this A3G strip made me think of decades ago when it was drawn by Alex Kotsky, and the art wasn’t just good, it was astonishingly good.

I mean, I understand that one wouldn’t expect today’s offering to cause anyone to think of the concept of “astonishingly good art”… nevertheless, there it is.
ItAintEazy
August 19th, 2007 at 3:50 pm [Reply]

FOOB: Well if nothing else, I bet Mustache and Lizardbreath are hits at speed-dating sessions.

Shorter Doonesbury: “If I lost BD. . .” yadda yadda yadda.
bats :[
August 19th, 2007 at 3:58 pm [Reply]

30. Mibbitmaker: sure, you might fault Vera…but what about Dr. Drew? Has he forgotten what a tragically frail ego Dawn Weston has? And what about that promised moonlight trail ride?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/9545446@N07/1174838246/
LynnyM
August 19th, 2007 at 4:17 pm [Reply]

Today’s Family Circus was really great… up until the point where they survived.

And if I weren’t emetophobic, I’d LOVE to see Dolly projectile vomit.
bats :[
August 19th, 2007 at 4:29 pm [Reply]

42. Joe Blevins: yes, that Corellian stylin’ is all the rage…it can be embarrassing at times…
http://www.flickr.com/photos/9545446@N07/1175093380/

51. LynnyM: yeah, the lack of that yearned-for outcome was a disappointment. I’m convinced that Kitty has to be dead and stuffed, or drugged out of its little feline mind: no cat is going to sit through being banged around in a near head-on collision, and then stick around anywhere near the site if the window’s open…
Anonymous
August 19th, 2007 at 4:40 pm [Reply]

MW: Am I the only one who thinks Vera pretended her heels felt funny so she could bump into Drew and initiate love?
Reynard Noir.
August 19th, 2007 at 4:56 pm [Reply]

Slylock’s only human, you know. Well, he isn’t, but you know what I mean. He can let a guy have his fun…
Don
August 19th, 2007 at 4:59 pm [Reply]

Did anyone else notice the hidden political message in today’s Marmaduke?

http://img469.imageshack.us/my.php?image=barakvr6.jpg
Ivan Lermolieff
August 19th, 2007 at 5:01 pm [Reply]

cameradog […] Fideaux

This is one of those few things that make life worth living, in spite of almost everything else.
Anonymous Novelist
August 19th, 2007 at 5:04 pm [Reply]

Photographer Fideaux also appears to be shooting with the same 8mm camera used to make the Zabruder Film.
Ryl
August 19th, 2007 at 5:08 pm [Reply]

Why oh why did Lizardbreath not strangle Granthony with his (probably 1970s polyester) tie?
dale
August 19th, 2007 at 5:22 pm [Reply]

40 – Idle Dandy
re BabyBarf: I didn’t look that closely at what the kid was eating; but when I was in the sixth grade, a friend told me that his little sister would eat a stick of butter.
linear Z
August 19th, 2007 at 5:25 pm [Reply]

Funky winkerbean: Zing!!! Merry Dissmiss, bush administration. You’ve just been leesed!
Jaxon Grwffydd
August 19th, 2007 at 5:27 pm [Reply]

Dunno how you managed to miss Friday’s stellar ep of Mark Trail, in which Jackelrod had a conversation balloon coming out of Cherry’s crotch that said “Let’s go see what’s going on!”

Methinx you’re slipping.
AeroSquid
August 19th, 2007 at 5:52 pm [Reply]

#61: You’re right ! I think Elrod is just screwing with our heads now.

http://pst.rbma.com/content/Mark_Trail?date=20070817
Foobar
August 19th, 2007 at 5:53 pm [Reply]

Is the Apartment 3G universe continuous with They’ll Do It Everytime’s? I wonder, what with the constant head-swiveling and consternation and shirt/ vest combinations– and urges, presumably, but I won’t speculate.
AeroSquid
August 19th, 2007 at 5:54 pm [Reply]

That word balloon isn’t just in the general area of Cherry’s pie, its wedged in there tight !
Foobar
August 19th, 2007 at 5:59 pm [Reply]

It’s very common, but I still love the Dimension of Eternal Plaid that cartoon textiles often open into.
Old Man Muffaroo [Kip W: certified funny!]
August 19th, 2007 at 6:07 pm [Reply]

SF – And here I thought the solution would turn out to be “So who took the picture? Eh? Eh, smart guy??”
Dr. Mad
August 19th, 2007 at 6:30 pm [Reply]

Uncle Lumpy is back, and he’s as bad good as ever! Yay! I snicker-snorted at Foob on Sunday because we had just been watching an MST3K short on dating and marriage starring 45 year old college -students, and -drum roll please – THEY HAD THE SAME LIST Asshathony and Lizzardo are reading to each other! BTW-my definition of fake love is ‘Restaurant love,’ by that I mean anybody can be in love in a restaurant – both parties should try being at home with two toddlers, neither toilet-trained, while getting over a head cold, with three sick cats, your mother-in-law [even if you love her dearly] and a broken sink, if you’re still in love -you got it nailed.
andreavis
August 19th, 2007 at 6:42 pm [Reply]

Dr. Drew, are you sure you want to date a woman who can’t walk and talk at the same time? Geez, give her a piece of gum, and her head will explode.
Artist formerly known as Ben
August 19th, 2007 at 7:22 pm [Reply]

Yes, the artist wanted to show Dennis heaving a baseball into his dad’s sack. But that was a little too raunchy for THE MAN, Muthafucka!
apricoco
August 19th, 2007 at 8:25 pm [Reply]

Did anyone else think it weird that two of today’s comics featured sloths? First, Get Fuzzy and then (right below in my local paper) Zits. I thought it was sloth day in the funnies.
Some dude
August 19th, 2007 at 8:31 pm [Reply]

Aw man, for a moment there I thought that the Family Circus strip had ended. :(

And as for Spiderman, why does everyone expect every crime to be resolved by Spiderman? What happened to L.A.’s trust in its police force? I mean…they’re being terrorised by the Shocker. The Shocker
Some dude
August 19th, 2007 at 8:33 pm [Reply]

@71: Hey, you’ve got to admit that the sloth in the Flames jersey was ingenious.
Some dude
August 19th, 2007 at 8:34 pm [Reply]

Ack! I meant #70. Ack again for the triple post :(
Chet McCord, Wildlife Defender
August 19th, 2007 at 8:56 pm [Reply]

I don”t know which is more disturbing– that Crock’s creator(s) don’t know of the the new world distribution of the cactacae, or that multiple — multiple! — readers of the Comics Curmudgeon do.
Chet McCord, Wildlife Defender
August 19th, 2007 at 8:57 pm [Reply]

That’s cataceae, not cactacae, as several of you know.
RoboMax IS NO FUN!!!
August 19th, 2007 at 9:05 pm [Reply]

Man, Mister Wilson is sporting quite possibly the gayest look I have ever seen on a comics page.

Meanwhile, Mary Worth’s storyline about dull, uninteresting people dating continues to be dull and uninteresting.

I miss Aldo, you guys.
Tommy Smarts
August 19th, 2007 at 9:15 pm [Reply]

As a working field archaeologist specializing in Incan artifacts, it is only a strange coincidence that the sherds recovered look exactly like broken pieces of modern toilets, glossy white surface, slight surface crackling, down to the centuries of mineral and organic material staining. It isn’t nice for the Crock cartoonist to say that, though. And the market for antiquities will likely be flooded with fake artifacts thanks to their thoughtless writing.
Tamex
August 19th, 2007 at 9:32 pm [Reply]

FOOB: The word is BOXCARRRGGGH!
snacktime
August 19th, 2007 at 9:36 pm [Reply]

Is this one of you curmudgeons? I don’t know the crowd here very well just yet.

http://home.comcast.net/~wdboldstar/fbofw_parody_by_pixelfish.jpg

MW: I think we need to see a Vera-Dawn confrontation pretty soon so we can verify that they are not, in fact, the same person. Note in both cases the badly fitted wigs and the outfits purchased hastily at the local Sally Ann. Dawn/Vera is clearly curious to see whether Dr. Drew will live up to his reputation as a raging manwhore and I believe she has just found her answer.
Cyan
August 19th, 2007 at 9:55 pm [Reply]

Huh. I thought for sure that the reason Weirdly’s fraud was detectible was that he’s wearing the same frigging sneakers in the moon photo as he is at the press conference.
dungbeetle[s]
August 19th, 2007 at 9:59 pm [Reply]

Since when does romantic equal sickly pastel yellow?
Lammergeier13
August 19th, 2007 at 10:36 pm [Reply]

FOOB: Hey guys, everyone knows that the relationship isn’t serious until you meet one another in a public place and exchange your lists of demands. Until that happens, how can the hostage negotiations continue?…. Wait, what’s that? This is supposed to be a wedding engagement?! WTF?
Sylphi
August 19th, 2007 at 11:15 pm [Reply]

@ Kate: Actually, women wear shoes which make absolutely zero sense all the time. Just walk around Boston in the middle of the winter and look out for women in high heels slipping on the icy sludge.

We call them ’shuttle girls’ because their inappropriate footwear condemned them to waiting for shuttle buses to get anywhere on campus, rather than just walking.
Zamboni_Rodeo
August 20th, 2007 at 1:23 am [Reply]

#67, Dr. Mad:

Your theory on “Restaurant Love” makes me realize that someone here simply MUST do a parody of the Captain and Tennille’s “Mustkrat Love.” Surely SOMEone here is equal to the challenge. I’d do it myself, but alas, I am not as equal as others when it comes to cleverly re-working song lyrics.

Anyone?
Edward
August 20th, 2007 at 1:32 am [Reply]

Pluggers, 20/8. If there are three words I never, ever wanted to see together, and in this particular order, they are ‘The Plugger Facial’. Farewell, libido.
praepes
August 20th, 2007 at 1:45 am [Reply]

A3G: Actually, Alan’s abuse of alcohol was mentioned way back in February, albeit very briefly:

http://joshreads.com/?p=962
"Semicolon" Jones
August 20th, 2007 at 2:26 am [Reply]

Third in the parade of Drew’s love interests… Aldo?
Ivan Lermolieff
August 20th, 2007 at 5:04 am [Reply]

Crock: to be read “crack”, following the illegal substances’ lead: that would explain the mound of smashed cans and sinks, de rigueur accessories in any self-respecting crackhouse.
Ginger Yellow
August 20th, 2007 at 5:15 am [Reply]

That’s got to be the harshest Slylock Fox ever. It could be anything – the fact that Wierdly is taller than the rocket, the fact that moon craters don’t look anything like that, the fact that he’s wearing a frigging top hat inside his helmet (how big must it be? He’d never get out the hatch), the trainers mentioned by a poster above, or the total absence of any room for fuel in the rocket. And to top it all off, the shadows in the “real” part of the cartoon are all over the shop. Is this a Dickian style commentary on the nature of reality?
Other_Sally
August 20th, 2007 at 7:44 am [Reply]

I must admit some slight fondness for this MW strip because I’ve actually used that “oh no, my shoes are painful!” trick on men I’ve been interested in before. “Oh no, these shoes are terrible–do you mind if I hold onto you for balance as I remove them–whoops, thank you!”

It works surprisingly well, so long as you don’t play too dumb, since it activates the protector instinct, elicits sympathy, and gives you the excuse to show off some leg while removing shoe. And of course, lets you do that whole falling-into-someone’s-arms-by-accident deal.

However, what the hell is up with Vera’s hair?
Ginger Yellow
August 20th, 2007 at 8:37 am [Reply]

As Marlowe once said: “She tried to sit on my lap while I was standing up”.
Chris
August 20th, 2007 at 9:21 am [Reply]

GT: Coach Kaz: “Great show. With luck it’ll be the last one I see.” Nice compliment, Slick–what do you tell Gil after Milford wins–”Great game. With luck it’ll be the last one I see.”

MW: Two possible plotlines: Dawn, spurned by what she thought was true love at last, goes hyper-emo and starts cutting on herself, or, Vera, spurned by what she thought was true love at last, goes crazy and seeks solace in the incestuous sheets of brother Von. Either way, we readers win.

FC: 65 MPH is the latest “update” to bring the vintage strips into the 21st century. Watch for “My Humps” to be playing on the car radio any day now.

JP: I don’t care how this tired storyline plays out, just get back to the boobs, please.
Edgy DC
August 20th, 2007 at 10:16 am [Reply]

Drew: hauling her (un)romanitically down by the splintery old docks that he uses to take his countless conquests — last names unimportant and long since forgotten — and pick up smuggled drug drops. You can almost hear the old salty dockhand saying, “Thar be Dr. Feelgood, and Dawn, or Sally, or whoever. Snicker.”

Vera: throwing herself clumsily at Drew like a broken bat at Mike Piazza, torturing herself with heels, but not thkinking enough of the date to bother to take her damn hair out of that damn ponytail, slipping out of the shoes in a symbolic hint of all she will take off for Drew if he’ll just catch her when… oops. Ugh.

How can the stars allow themselves twinkle on these two awful people?
vbg
August 20th, 2007 at 1:51 pm [Reply]

What IS that reporter’s species? I see no tail, nor ears protruding through her coif; is she human? When have there ever been any human characters in Slylock Fox?
Dan
August 20th, 2007 at 3:43 pm [Reply]

Missing from the second to last panel in FOOBs is:
“Looks disturbingly like my father.”
“Check.”
“Willing to get freaky and do the retrograde wheelbarrel.”
“Check!”
Adam Villani
August 22nd, 2007 at 3:39 pm [Reply]

I don’t care what species she is, just make sure Slylock keeps investigating the same stories she is. But don’t make me have to choose between her and Cassandra Cat.

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