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Hi and Lois, 3/27/26

A thing about Hi and Lois and comic strip time that you really have to keep in mind is that Hi and Lois has been in newspapers with Trixie as one of its characters since 1954, but Hi and Lois just had their youngest child within the last year. She’s a baby! She’s pretty much brand new! That’s why it’s deeply psychotic to see them grinning broadly about how happy their bird friend is about being an empty nester. You just reset that clock! You’re nearly two decades out from singing this cheerful tune! Are you not listening to yourselves?

Pluggers, 3/27/26

Pluggers sing in the shower so their spouse will know they’re OK, and choose lyrics to reaffirm the fact that they’re bisexual and polyamorous. Yeah, that’s right! It’s 2026 now! Pluggers are bi and poly! Get on their level.

Gil Thorp, 3/27/26

I’m willing to follow Gil Thorp to a lot of places, so I would’ve accepted it if the strip had told me that this year’s golf program was going to get mildly interesting. But very interesting? Nope. Not buying it. This is golf we’re talking about, c’mon.

Crankshaft, 3/27/26

I’m sorry if my last Crankshaft post gave you the impression that the title character would be slowly and tragically fading away into senility over the coming months. In fact, he’s going to be very rapidly but still tragically smeared all over the highway in the next few minutes. I regret the error.

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Blondie, 3/26/26

Every once in a while, you get a hint that Alexander is recapitulating many of his father’s most distinctive traits. This makes sense, as the two are obviously genetically identical, and I assume Alexander was created by some sort of asexual budding process. Still, how does Dagwood feel about all this? Well, not great, if his facial expression in the last panel is any indication.

Wizard of Id, 3/26/26

Imagine if you were a second-generation comics creator, gifted with one of the shrinking number of viable newspaper comics out there, but feeling increasingly uninspired and desperate to find some way out of your situation. I’m not saying I know that’s what’s happening with the Wizard of Id, but I am saying that if you were trying to do the comics version of suicide by cop, then inviting a lawsuit from JK Rowling would be a good way to go about it.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 3/26/26

“I’m sick and tired of all this roots country bullshit!” you’re probably saying. “I want to get this strip’s focus back to its roots: contemporary medical issues!” Well, OK, buckle up for “Rex has pivoted his clinic to mostly writing GLP-1 scrips for anyone who asks and then directing them to a dodgy grey-market compounding pharmacy that he gets kickbacks from.”

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Crankshaft, 3/25/26

I like the combination of Crankshaft’s dopey smile and Keesterman’s look of genuine concern in the final panel. Consistently misspeaking like this isn’t normal and it isn’t funny, and I guess someone should tell the latter to Andrews McMeel Syndication, which sells this strip to newspapers all over the country.

Hi and Lois, 3/25/26

Wow, Hi’s face in that last panel is a lot less “Ha ha, the mayor wasn’t even able to get that ball over the plate!” and a lot more “Oh my god … the mayor somehow killed six and injured dozens more with an errant throw. This is awful. This is the darkest opening day in the history of Major League Baseball.”

Mary Worth, 3/25/26

I feel like logically we must assume that there’s an unseen third panel, where someone is fretting that Mary hasn’t reached out for a bit. Is it Wilbur? Probably Wilbur. He’s hit some new emotional low in a comical fashion and Mary is the last person he knows who won’t laugh directly in his face about it. Obviously there’s no unseen fourth panel, because nobody is worried that Wilbur hasn’t gotten in touch lately.