Metapost: C ……. OTW!!!!
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Comment of the week? COMMENT OF THE WEEK, BABY!
“Is this the first time we’ve seen the Daddy Daze daddy without glasses? There goes my theory that he was the victim of some diabolical experiment involving psychosis-inducing glasses.” –Pozzo
Hilarious runners up? HECK YEAH
“The world’s largest corporations are spending trillions of dollars so the Montoni’s robot can drop the awful puns that are the staple of Westview discourse and make Crankshaft redundant and completely unnecessary to the point where he can vanish from his eponymous strip. Worth it!” –But What Do I Know?
“Pro tip: don’t drink milk out of jugs that are a solid nonwhite color.” –Morgan Wick
“Looks like Greg’s mutant powers are changing the weather to match his mood again. Little-known fact: Hurricane Sandy was the result of a particularly bad loss Greg suffered betting at the horse track.” –Abram Beazer
“Okay, I’m not saying turning this strip into Pepper the Pizza Robot (featuring Crankshaft) is a good idea, as such. I’m just saying it’s better than Harry Dinkle, World’s Greatest Band Director (featuring Crankshaft) which is where we seemed to be heading last month.” –Horace Broon
“I guess Pluggers was never meant to be seen at this resolution — it’s meant to be seen roughly the size of a postage stamp, printed in the cheapest inks on the greyest paper America’s struggling newspapers can afford — but those wonky pupils don’t look excited, they look manic with fear and rage. This is a man who is either suffering a breakdown, or is being depicted at the very moment he experiences his last colonoscopy.” –Schroduck
“I know that because they wouldn’t shut up about it while they were doing it. Just kept talking out loud as if they were narrating their own lives in the world’s most pointless documentary. God I am looking forward to the silence…” –pugfuggly
“What’s alarming is that by ‘apartment newsletter,’ she means a newsletter for their apartment — her husband is the only reader! It includes articles like ‘Study Finds Picking Up Socks Associated With 20% Increase in Happiness,’ ‘Local Man Needs to Buy More Toilet Paper,’ and ‘Gray Sofa Has Got to Go.’ Plus there’s a weekly dinner schedule (which only covers six meals, plus a recipe for Newsletter Night: ‘1 can chili + 1/2 bag frozen vegetables + microwave.’ Remarkably, she also writes and draws three surprisingly funny comic strips.” –BigTed
“If you’re a plugger, raising your arms in triumph and yelling ‘WOO HOO!’ would probably kill you, right there and then. I mean, you’d die with a smile on your face, but they’d also have to saw your arms off to fit you inside a coffin.” –Joe Blevins
“I look forward to the rest of this week’s Rex Morgan strips, in which Head-Lump tries out different ways of explaining the concept and process of moving to the twin’s increasingly addled grandfather. ‘Loaded some boxes and suitcases in their car and split.’ ‘Packed up their stuff and left.’ ‘Okay. First, they removed all their belongings from the premises. Are you with me so far? Good. And then they vacated said premises. Still with me? No? Hmm. Here, let me get out my finger puppets…’” –Doctor Moreau (Not a Doctor)
“First we have Nelly, who hates Mary and everything she stands for, and now we have Alma, who responds to the tepid ‘drama’ of the strip with dismissive ‘so what?’ I think we may have the most relatable Mary Worth arc in history here.” –TheDiva
“Actually, Helpful Apartment Resident’s head lump makes perfect artistic sense when you consider the tableau formed by the last two panels in today’s strip. Clearly these characters are being set in stark contrast to each other: Ollman is white, Lumpy is black; Ollman is old, McLump is young; Ollman wears black over powder blue, the Lumpster wears powder blue over black. So of course, since Ollman doesn’t have a weird head lump, there’s only one option that makes narrative sense.” –Vulpes
“And what about the reports of Marty Moon infiltrating your honeymoon suite and giving a play by play account?” –Liam
“We live in a cancel culture.’ Horsefeathers! You live in a legacy strip, the very definition of something that should be cancelled but isn’t!” –Ettorre
“What’s he doing with Mary? No, seriously. What’s anyone doing with Mary? In fact, in that light, avoiding witnesses sounds perfectly reasonable.” –Hibbleton
“Alma: Shots fired. ‘But his wife is hot! What could he possibly want with that hag?’ is such a funny take on this. ‘Mary’s far more age-appropriate, but laughing? In a car? You should only car-laugh with your wife, who is [checks notes] pretty! I mean, that’s the only thing I know about her, honestly, we’ve never spoken, I think her name might be Tommy, but — she’s beautiful! And young! Mary’s not even funny! Have you heard her tight five at the Charterstone monthly residents’ breakfast? So many jokes about muffins. Anyway, Nelly, gotta dash, I’ve got like five past-due bills here and I’ve gotta make myself scarce before The Man comes a’callin’. Toodles!’” –els
“The girls are giving Ian WAY more player cred than he deserves. I’d have gone with ‘Ian got out of the car and looked around like he didn’t know where he was.’” –MKay
“The most disturbing part of The Lockhorns is how much they have to fuck up the proportions of their entire world, just so that Leroy and Loretta can interact with it.” –Rosstifer
“So the purchase and unpackaging, to say nothing of possibly baking, of the cookies in the Flagston house is kept secret from Ditto? What other elaborate ruses are perpetuated? Can the sugar be salt? Liquid soaps interchangeable with lotions?? The Scott is now Charmin??? Oh, Flagstons, you purveyors of delightful madness!” –A Grave Mind
“[3 min earlier] No. Look. You see the sign ‘Adult Non-milestone Birthday Gift Suggestions?’ Just past that.” –Kevin on Earth
“He ate all those cookies? Ooh, somebody stop him! [long silence] You know, like, ‘Ooh, somebody stop me!’ From The Mask? Another hit movie from 1994? [more silence] Look, I did a lot of research for this joke, so I’m not going to not type it out.” –Mr. A
“They sat down in the middle of the lobby to fully dissect the salacious gossip of … two people sitting in a car and one of them looking around as he got out? Does no one in this complex have a job? Or hobbies? Or self-respect?” –Lauralot
“Right, anyone know a good black light black velvet poster maker who can pull this off? Something like this deserves a place of honor on my dorm room wall forty years ago!” –Buck Ripsnort
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