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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 7/28/12

I’m not sure what’s more off-putting: that li’l preverbal Tater is fully aware of and completely committed to his tuber-derived name, or that he’s capable of drawing a startlingly realistic potato in chalk on a moment’s notice. But most disturbing of all is Loweezy’s sinister sidelong grin in the second panel, hinting at the dark purpose behind her son’s strange name. The Potato Revolution is coming, ladies, as soon as the Chosen One is old enough to rule. Be ready for it.

Archie, 7/28/12

So based on the clothing and the in-strip technology and something someone said to me off-hand in an email once, I’ve always assumed that the current batch of Archie newspaper strips are from the mid-90s, an assumption upended by today’s references to online dating and Linux. Yes, Linux dates from 1991 and Match.com launched in 1995, but I refuse to believe that Archie comics would ever be so up on any technological trends (or indeed any trends of any sort) as to namecheck them before they could be sure that most of their audience would get the reference, which means I can’t imagine this strip running before, say, 2002.

On the other hand, the startling words are in italics, and we’ve seen the reruns updated before, so who knows what the original text was. “I spend most of my time working on my book learning.” “You give new meaning to the concept of reading things instead of interacting with girls,” says the guy who responds to all romantic advances from ladies with abject terror.

Apartment 3-G, 7/28/12

Oh, don’t worry, everyone, we’re not just going to skip over Lu Ann’s story without acknowledging it! We’re going to acknowledge that we’re skipping over it, then skip over it. Look at how excited Tommie is! “I’m too scared to go first, but it’s amazing that Margo gave me the option!”

Ziggy, 7/28/12

Ziggy can’t remember what company insures his car, probably because he just suffered a traumatic brain injury.

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Mark Trail, 7/25/12

Rusty and his suddenly piercing blue eyes seem to have gone through some kind of handsomification (or at least de-hideousification) process, but don’t worry, he’s still alone in his room muttering furiously about “sheep killers” and “dead animals.”

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 7/25/12

I’ve always assumed that Hootin’ Holler was a socially conservative enclave, but it appears to actually be a polyamorous commune.

Hagar the Horrible, 7/25/12

Hagar the Horrible, the protagonist of a beloved nationally syndicated comic strip, is a thug who always takes what he wants with violence and threats of violence.

Pluggers, 7/25/12

Even before the Internet, pluggers could only make “friends” with people who lived far, far away from them.

Spider-Man, 7/25/12

“Let’s stare at them as he casually saunters away!”

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Click the banner to help sponsor Josh’s novel and to reserve your copy! Details here.

Just another quick thanks to everyone who’s sponsored my novel via Kickstarter so far! And if you haven’t, there’s still time! Why not check out the sample chapter to see if you want to pre-order?

Mark Trail, 7/17/12

Between this sinister aerial bighorn-poacher and Mark’s plane-flying murderous protagonists from the last storyline, we’re finally learning who the true villains in the Trailiverse are: people who have mastered the power of flight. Sure, Mark can fly a plane, but he’s morally incorruptible. The rest of humanity will get too close to the sun, go mad with delusions of godhood, and just start stone cold shooting everybody. Have you people even read the myth of Icarus? Stay on the ground, if you want to save your soul!

Spider-Man, 7/17/12

Peter Parker’s spider-sense might not be much good for saving him from being hit in the back of the head by non-superpowered villains or inanimate objects, but if you are talking shit about him within 20 feet, he will know about it.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 7/17/12

“Don’t worry, Jamey — that jest means she ain’t decided yet whether or not to bake you into a pie!”