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Slylock Fox, 5/25/08

At last, Count Weirdly has hit upon a sinister plan that’s actually sinister, not just irritating: dropping Max and a bevy of decoy robo-Maxes out of the bomb bay of his WeirdlyJet! I don’t even want to imagine the dumber-vs.-dumbest adventure that must have led up to Max’s capture. Fortunately, Weirdly has forgotten the tails on his Maxdroids, because otherwise they are identical to the real thing in every respect — including their no doubt helpless mewling as they plummet to their deaths, and bowler hats that remain firmly in place, in violation of the laws of physics.

The sickest part, for me, is the vulture sitting on the WeirdlyJet’s nose, presumably waiting for Max to hit the ground with a splat so he can enjoy some lunch.

Meanwhile, over in the Six Differences, I like the happy expression on the frog’s face, as he silently salutes his crocodile brother, striking a blow for cold-blooded creatures against their mammalian oppressors.

Blondie, 5/25/08

I’m kind of charmed by Dagwood’s terrified retreat that finally leaves him standing in the empty bathtub, his last place of refuge (occasional incursions from his boss notwithstanding). I also like the fact that Daisy has followed the bickering couple upstairs, wearing a terrified expression that says “Why are male-person-who-feeds-me and female-person-who-feeds-me fighting? Why? Will this affect the frequency with which I’m fed?”

Dennis the Menace, 5/25/08

Gee, when it comes to questions about his past military service, Mr. Wilson seems to be protesting a little too much, complete with his trademarked creepy single bead of sweat. Is it possible that this whole “flat feet” story is just a front (after all, he did walk a mail route for thirty years) and that George Wilson was just too much of a coward to fight the Nazis/the Hun/the Spanish Menace/however the hell old he’s supposed to be?

Sally Forth, 5/25/08

My, the shape of Ted’s squirt gun certainly is … suggestive.

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Funky Winkerbean, 5/13/08

If I’m remembering correctly, the Tragically Ironic Hearing Loss storyline that led to Harry Dinkle’s retirement took place before the decade-long timejump. Since his constant mopey presence around the house has been driving his wife up the wall since day one, she’s no doubt well and truly insane by now. This may explain why she’s harassing a school board official about her personal problems, or why she feels a need to refer to her husband by his full name, including middle initial, in casual conversation. As Harriet’s already admitted that she’s crazy, I hope the school board president is desperately pressing the panic button under his desk, before she turns violent.

Mark Trail, 5/13/08

We all know that Mark Trail only cares about humans to the extent that they threaten wildlife habitat or get punched by Mark, but even by the standards of this strip the handling of little Madeline’s “condition” is shockingly bonkers. Has anyone involved in the production of this strip encountered the modern medical system in any way, shape, or form? What the hell kind of doctor looks at a comatose little girl, scratches his chin thoughtfully, and then writes PUPPY half-legibly on his prescription pad? The kind that gets generous kickbacks from the American Kennel Club, that’s what kind.

Blondie, 5/13/08

Some clever Photoshopper needs to change the dialog in this strip so that Elmo and his towheaded little friend are simply demanding money from Dagwood and threatening to beat his legs with that baseball bat if he doesn’t comply. It would explain his typical but still odd lope in the third panel.

Family Circus, 5/13/08

“But then, most paper money has been up people’s noses, so it’s kind of a mixed bag.”

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Spider-Man, 4/21/08

Behold … the VULTURE! The latest in the rogue’s gallery of sinister, inhuman supervillains to plague the newspaper strip version of Spider-Man, the Vulture terrifies us with his powers … or, um, menacing costume … uh, actually, he just appears to be some ordinary dude in jail mumbling vague threats of vengeance. Since this is Spider-Man, the prison guard is threatening him with the ultimate act of torture: the withdrawal of television privileges.

Blondie, 4/21/08

Attention Amalgamated Blondie Humor Industries LLC: if you are going to do a close-up on one of your characters, as you do in panel three here, please actually draw the character in close-up, rather than just increasing the scale of their face in Photoshop. Otherwise it looks strange and disturbing.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 4/21/08

Any public official will tell you that there comes a time in a town hall meeting when the thread is simply lost, never to be found again. Rex Morgan, M.D.’s MRSA meeting has hit that point, as angry townsfolk begin to demand that the county health commission bring their loved ones back from the dead.

Pluggers, 4/21/08

Pluggers have no idea what an enormous pain in the ass they are to everyone around them.