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Archive: Blondie

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Sorry, nothing that goes on in the Bumstead home constitutes a “healthy lifestyle”

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Blondie, 2/1/25

You know, this strip originally became a cultural sensation when it was about a dissolute failson who wooed and married a flapper and got disinherited over it, but then for a lot longer than that it was about a suburban dipshit who was married to a woman wildly out of his league, and I’m not going to say that’s good or anything, but it’s a hell of a lot better than a strip in which people encourage their children to “vlog” about “healthy lifestyle ideas.” This one is even going so far as to imply that getting involved in the online influencer grift could get you laid! It makes me sick.

Hi and Lois, 2/1/25

Lois was smart to do this: Thirsty is wearing an orange sweater, clearly signaling that he was prepared to go “Garfield mode” on that lasagna. Of course, the sassy orange cat would never let a nagging note stop him from devouring the Italian dish he loves so much, which is why Thirsty, as much as I hold him in great affection, is not a top-tier comic character and never will be.

Shoe, 2/1/25

I’ll say this much for Shoe: when it has characters say jokes like this, it at least has the good grace to make them look like they want to die.

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Grim Wednesday

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Between Friends, 1/29/25

Really kind of depressing that in every panel where we see the Blonde Between Friends Friend’s face here, her facial expression is nothing but grim resignation. She’s not actually getting any joy out of keeping this egg tray. She’s not happy the world is like this, or that she’s like this. But she’s not getting rid of the tray!

Blondie, 1/29/25

I guess it would’ve been a little on the nose for Blondie’s flashback to show her and Dagwood actually saying the phrase in question in their vows, but it’s a little unnerving to instead see them just staring ahead and simultaneously visualizing a big sandwich while the minister blabs on about what Jesus wants their relationship to be like or whatever. Dagwood is doing this because he’s just thinking about big sandwiches all the time, but Blondie … well, I’m not sure what’s going on with her, whether she’s trying to psych herself up to get married to a Big Sandwich Guy or if she’s thinking about spending the wedding night making big sandwiches to feed to him, sexually, or what. Anyway, this wedding sadly cannot hold a candle to the time Dagwood’s parents got him hepped up on ether and tried to force him to marry Blondie’s roommate.

Alice, 1/29/25

Oh, also, Alice has gotten dumped by her boyfriend, a grown man (?) who dresses like a comical child, which has to be pretty embarrassing for her. This is a lady who’s been kidnapped by aliens and flirted at by air conditioners but I have to think she sees this as a low even for the context of the strip.

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Simply refuse to believe that Hi Flagston has a satisfying social life. It doesn’t add up

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Sam and Silo, 1/28/25

You know what would be awkward? If you were a corrupt city official taking kickbacks from a local sporting goods supplier, and one of the things they produced was “rebounders” for soccer practice, sometimes referred to as “kickbacks,” and you pitched them an idea for a small version. That’s pretty much the only circumstance where you’d ever say “Where’s that little kickback we discussed? No, I am not talking about football” to someone on the phone, which would also require you to be using “football” in the non-American sense even though you’re an American. It’s a vanishingly rare scenario, which is why it’s kind of amazing to see it captured in today’s Sam and Silo.

Blondie, 1/28/25

As I long ago noted on here, as a child I read Peanuts anthologies obsessively, and I knew what the context of a sigh was because the characters were always sighing, but I didn’t realize what physical noise was being described so I would just say “sigh” aloud at times when one might sigh, and no adult corrected me for years, presumably because they found it very funny. In my defense sometimes Peanuts would just drop the word in word balloons, so I’m not sure what I was supposed to think. Anyway, in today’s Blondie, I guess Mr. Dithers is supposed to be smacking his lips as he enjoys a delicious donut, but I’d prefer to think he’s saying “Smack!” with the implication being that this delicious donut is taking him to the same state of euphoria that a junkie experiences after injecting heroin into their veins.

Hi and Lois, 1/28/25

A thing I feel very certain saying about Hi Flagston is that he has exactly one friend, and it’s Thirsty Thurston, which means that either (a) they’re on a two-man bowling team and Hi showed up tonight and Thirsty, probably drunk and belligerent, demanded to be captain of the team, and Hi sheepishly backed down, or (b) he’s on a team with a few acquaintances or maybe just people that the bowling league arbitrarily assigned together, and the rest of them decided Hi was a drip and a loser and pulled off some sort of coup, much to his humiliation. I think either of these scenarios would’ve frankly been a more interesting comic strip than this little “oh no, Lois briefly thought the family’s finances were in crisis” switcheroo.